Long live the new king! :D

.. Wow. I couldn't make this up if I tried. What has been going on in my small little country?

Holland used to have a quin and now she will hand the thrown to her son, so that we will have a king again. So far nothing special. The royals are purely ceremonial here and their only job is to cut ribbons and be friendly to people they don't care about. But they nonetheless have a massive fanclub. Everyone with a misplaced sense of national pride loves them. We are orange, tulips, football, windmills and the quin king, yay!

So, what happened? Some fanbrat thought it would be a great idea to ask the Dutch people to write a song to celebrate the new king. The idea being that everyone could send him a line of text and he would try to mix and combine that garbage into a coherent song text. Of course it was a disaster right from the start. Soon, evil internet trolls made fun of his song on twitter. Last Saturday, he was so butthurt that he decided to withdraw the song from the official celebrations! The links are in Dutch, but I will translate this juicy bit:

Quote :

Ewbanks zus Jennifer zegt op Twitter dat ze het vreselijk vindt. "Ik ben zo boos! Ik schaam mij diep voor diegene die zich zo respectloos op John hebben gestort." Marco Borsato toont begrip voor het besluit. "#begrip #metopgehevenhoofd #oranjeboven", twittert hij.

Ewbanks sister Jennifer says on Twitter she thinks it's horrible. "I am so angry! I am deeply ashamed of those who did this, with such lack of respect." Marco Borsato understands the decision. "#understanding #withraisedhead #orangewillprevail", he twitters.

But fans, don't despair: last night he saw the light. Ignore the trolls! He will still present the song coming sunday. So much joy.

And the Dutch media presented it all as it is: Completely Serious Fucking Business.

In case anyone is curious, here is the refrain of the masterpiece this is all about:

Quote :

De W van Willem Drie vingers in de lucht, kom op, kom op De W van Willem is de W van wij Heel Oranje staat zij aan zij De W van water waar we niet voor wijken We leggen het droog en we bouwen dijken De W van welkom in ons midden Tot welke God je ook moge bidden De W van Willem De W van wakker, stamppot eten Miljoenen coaches die beter weten De W van altijd willen winnen Wat het ook is waar wij aan beginnen De W van wij zijn een met elkaar Met de schouders naast elkaar En dus roepen we vandaag van

The W of William Three fingers in the air, come on, come on The W of William is the W of we all of Orange is standing side by side the W of water that we don't stop for but drain dry and we build dikes The W of welcome in our midst Regardless of what God you pray to The W of William the W of wanting to win whatever it is we start The W of we are together shoulder to shoulder And that's why we yell today

Spork wrote:

We are orange, tulips, football, windmills and the quin king, yay!

I doubt you all are any good at either type of football.

spork wrote:

Holland used to have a quin

It's queen, you dolt. Queen.

spork wrote:

But they nonetheless have a massive fanclub. Everyone with a misplaced sense of national pride loves them.

It's like you have an opinion about our royal house our something.

spork wrote:

In case anyone is curious, here is the refrain of the masterpiece this is all about:

Actually, this would be a verse? A refrain is a recurring set of lines in a song, a verse happens in between of the refrains.

Also, it might be helpful to link to the song in question, so that the one or two people here who are marginally interested in Dutch affairs can actually judge the song on something else than a really bad translation.

Anyway, so, the idea of this was kind of cool? I'm always a sucker for those We Are the World/Live Aid-things, and this would be a similar thing: roughly fifty Dutch celebrities (ranging from the A-listers to, well, the F-listers, I guess) would sing a song to celebrate our new king. So far so good. But then:

• The lyrics were collaboratively written, resulting in a huge, disjointed mess.
  
• Musically, the song seems like somebody put the arrangements to four different songs together. Which is probably what happened, since there were four to five different people involved in writing this Frankensteinesque little ditty.
  
• Oh, also, the main melody sounds suspiciously like an already existing song.
  
• The idea is that the Dutch people will sing this to the new king, Willem-Alexander. The lyrics, however, are more suited to a mother singing to her newborn babe. 'We will keep you strong and weather the storm - together', indeed.
  
• Oh, and there's the gratuitous rapping, which is... Absolutely bizarre. Spork was right in quoting that bit, because it's the absolute worst.

It's a real shame, because the artists involved are generally pretty good, as long as we ignore the various people culled from various televised television competitions. None of them mean anything to you lot, though, so... But they even had Wouter Hamel, this pretty cool jazzy singer, who's actually pretty decent and one of the few semi-famous Dutch people I wouldn't mind showing around in my bed.

Mikey Go WOOGA wrote:

Spork wrote:

We are orange, tulips, football, windmills and the quin king, yay!

I doubt you all are any good at either type of football.

Whatever, Mikey. Has your country come around to accepting European football or gay marriage yet? Didn't think so.

Jay/Cris wrote:

one of the few semi-famous Dutch people I wouldn't mind showing around in my bed.

"And this is my pillow... and here behind the mattress is where I keep the condoms... and this is the footend, where- are you listening? WHY AREN'T YOU LISTENING ò.ó"

Jay/Cris wrote:

It's queen, you dolt. Queen.

Holy smoke, I wrote quin? I'll blame it on the booze.

Jay/Cris wrote:

It's like you have an opinion about our royal house our something.

or something.

I don't mind the royals, they're ok. It's just how everything surrounding them is so overhyped at the moment. I mean, when someone being offended over internet trolls flaming his crap song is treated as a serious news item, as if it matters just as much as wars and femines and .. that's just surreal.

spork wrote:

Jay/Cris wrote:

It's queen, you dolt. Queen.

Holy smoke, I wrote quin? I'll blame it on the booze.

Could have been worse

Ahahahaha

haha

"This is for our KING! Our leader, our Lionheart, our Alexander the Great! We shall WATCH HIM SLEEP."

Jay/Cris wrote:

Mikey Go WOOGA wrote:

Spork wrote:

We are orange, tulips, football, windmills and the quin king, yay!

I doubt you all are any good at either type of football.

Whatever, Mikey. Has your country come around to accepting European football or gay marriage yet? Didn't think so.

Gay marriage is irrelevant.

I get the feeling we could crush the Dutch at rugby. But what we REALLY need to do is get better than the goddamn French. It's depressing that the French are 1.) Better than us at anything and 2.) Better than us at a sport that is actually a sport and not a overhyped "contest" which is basically schoolgirls jogging and falling over.

Mikey Go WOOGA wrote:

Gay marriage is irrelevant.

I get the feeling we could crush the Dutch at rugby. But what we REALLY need to do is get better than the goddamn French. It's depressing that the French are 1.) Better than us at anything and 2.) Better than us at a sport that is actually a sport and not a overhyped "contest" which is basically schoolgirls jogging and falling over.

It's not irrelevant, though it might not be particularly relevant to you.

Aw. The Dutch beat you at skating too, love.

Jay/Cris wrote:

Mikey Go WOOGA wrote:

Gay marriage is irrelevant.

I get the feeling we could crush the Dutch at rugby. But what we REALLY need to do is get better than the goddamn French. It's depressing that the French are 1.) Better than us at anything and 2.) Better than us at a sport that is actually a sport and not a overhyped "contest" which is basically schoolgirls jogging and falling over.

It's not irrelevant, though it might not be particularly relevant to you.

Aw. The Dutch beat you at skating too, love.

It's completely irrelevant to anything I (or anyone else in this thread) have said. You've awkwardly shoehorned your Issue into a thread that never had anything to do with it.

What kind of skating? Hockey, speed skating, or icetwirl? Because only the first two are sports. If you have judges as the sole deciders of the outcome, it's not a sport. Which is why the NBA and its Sternball isn't a legitimate sporting league anymore than the WWE (I watch the WWE, because even that shitshow beats the NBA).

Boxing is a grey area.

Mikey Go WOOGA wrote:

It's completely irrelevant to anything I (or anyone else in this thread) have said. You've awkwardly shoehorned your Issue into a thread that never had anything to do with it.

Do you not get the irony of the fact that you've managed to make this thread about American sports when it started out about the Dutch monarchy, and then said something like that?

TheHedonist wrote:

Mikey Go WOOGA wrote:

It's completely irrelevant to anything I (or anyone else in this thread) have said. You've awkwardly shoehorned your Issue into a thread that never had anything to do with it.

Do you not get the irony of the fact that you've managed to make this thread about American sports when it started out about the Dutch monarchy, and then said something like that?

The Dutch Monarchy is related to Europe and stupidity, which is related to fairyball, which is something the poor, retarded Europoors keep calling football, which isn't football, only rugby and manpile are legitimately football.

So on topic

Inb4 Jay says that the Dutch monarchy is related to the Dutchland, and he lives in Dutchland, and he's 110% gay, therefore this thread is related to gay marriage.

Jesus Christ I can't believe I spent time typing all of that, I need to turn my life around.

Mikey Go WOOGA wrote:

TheHedonist wrote:

Mikey Go WOOGA wrote:

It's completely irrelevant to anything I (or anyone else in this thread) have said. You've awkwardly shoehorned your Issue into a thread that never had anything to do with it.

Do you not get the irony of the fact that you've managed to make this thread about American sports when it started out about the Dutch monarchy, and then said something like that?

The Dutch Monarchy is related to Europe and stupidity, which is related to fairyball, which is something the poor, retarded Europoors keep calling football, which isn't football, only rugby and manpile are legitimately football.

So on topic

Inb4 Jay says that the Dutch monarchy is related to the Dutchland, and he lives in Dutchland, and he's 110% gay, therefore this thread is related to gay marriage.

Jesus Christ I can't believe I spent time typing all of that, I need to turn my life around.

Hee. Dude, if national sports are related to the government of a country, then national legislation concerning what the fuck ever (including gay marriage) is definitely linked to the government. The Dutch are proud of the fact that they were one of the first to legislate gay marriage, the same way they are proud of their football team and their speed skaters. (I mean, even in the song: there's a gay couple in the video.) If you want to cite sports accomplishments to 'prove' that your country is better, I am definitely free to cite open-minded legislation to lord over your torn country that's made up of dissenting voices that have no idea how to compromise and that can't make up their minds on anything, except maybe how awesome the Superbowl Sunday is and that a BigMac is the national dish.

But yes, great American football and baseball teams definitely make up for your fucked up health care system and your splendid rates of education, teen pregnancy and gay bashing. Go America!

Jay/Cris wrote:

But yes, great American football and baseball teams definitely make up for your fucked up health care system and your splendid rates of education, teen pregnancy and gay bashing. Go America!

To be fair you guys are a lot smaller and more homogenous.

TheHedonist wrote:

Do you not get the irony of the fact that you've managed to make this thread about American sports when it started out about the Dutch monarchy, and then said something like that?

This is MIKEY we're talking about, if it doesn't involve the Red Sux or the Boston Exploshun, it won't impress him.

Reidmar wrote:

TheHedonist wrote:

Do you not get the irony of the fact that you've managed to make this thread about American sports when it started out about the Dutch monarchy, and then said something like that?

This is MIKEY we're talking about, if it doesn't involve the Red Sux or the Boston Exploshun, it won't impress him.

I'm already sick of hearing about the BAWWWWWston explosions and their laughably insane overreaction. And I HAET the Red Sox with ALL OF MY HAET

Even though even the Red Sox could probably beat the Dutch rugby team. I mean, the Red Sox are so fucking bad at baseball, maybe they'll actually be good at something else. It's not likely they'll every be any good at anything, but one can hope.

TheHedonist wrote:

Jay/Cris wrote:

But yes, great American football and baseball teams definitely make up for your fucked up health care system and your splendid rates of education, teen pregnancy and gay bashing. Go America!

To be fair you guys are a lot smaller and more homogeneous.

To be fair, you guys have a lot more resources and this drive to be seen as the most best, most democratic and most freedomest country in the world.

Jay/Cris wrote:

TheHedonist wrote:

Jay/Cris wrote:

But yes, great American football and baseball teams definitely make up for your fucked up health care system and your splendid rates of education, teen pregnancy and gay bashing. Go America!

To be fair you guys are a lot smaller and more homogeneous.

To be fair, you guys have a lot more resources and this drive to be seen as the most best, most democratic and most freedomest country in the world.

At one time, yes america strove to be and do those things, now america strives to control and butt-fuck all other nations simultaneously. BAWWWWWWston explosion was highly over rated mikey, lets face it 3 people die? OMG SO SAAAAAAAAD!111one meanwhile... Turn back the clock about 70 years and bam. hello sweet sweet 9 million dead.

Jay/Cris wrote:

To be fair, you guys have a lot more resources and this drive to be seen as the most best, most democratic and most freedomest country in the world.

I mean, yes, but it's easier to set up a workable healthcare and education system for someodd-twenty-million people than it is for upwards-of-three-hundred-million, is my point, especially when your government is super-touchy about centralized power.

TheHedonist wrote:

Jay/Cris wrote:

To be fair, you guys have a lot more resources and this drive to be seen as the most best, most democratic and most freedomest country in the world.

I mean, yes, but it's easier to set up a workable healthcare and education system for someodd-twenty-million people than it is for upwards-of-three-hundred-million, is my point, especially when your government is super-touchy about centralized power.

Yes, but not so much easier that it'd be impossible for a larger government. Are you seriously going to argue that the problems of the US are due to the fact that there's too many people to properly govern?

Jay/Cris wrote:

Yes, but not so much easier that it'd be impossible for a larger government. Are you seriously going to argue that the problems of the US are due to the fact that there's too many people to properly govern?

Nah, just those two. Well, that and the fact that the states want federal money without any kind of regulation and that about half of our population doesn't think 'free health care' qualifies as governance.

Still, though, the sheer size of us is an issue, especially when you have what is essentially a small country's government that is forced to work with what is essentially a large country's government without a real country and the two need to work together for anything to get done (which, aside from disaster relief, nothing does, and even then not always).

Also we're spread super-thin resources-wise and people have crazily differing political views and education levels that are at least partially a function of geographic location (the farther south/west you go, the educational standards drop and political opinion moves from blue to red). These are not problems the Netherlands, as a country, will have to face any time in the near future unless your population begins to increase exponentially and you have a civil war that the entire southern half of your country never quite gets over.

So yeah, 'There's just too many of us' is a simplistic way of putting it, but it boils the issue down well I think.

TheHedonist wrote:

So yeah, 'There's just too many of us' is a simplistic way of putting it, but it boils the issue down well I think.

This is true. Each state is practically its own country so moving forward as a whole is much slower and more difficult. Not impossible, but definitely harder.

TheHedonist wrote:

Jay/Cris wrote:

Are you seriously going to argue that the problems of the US are due to the fact that there's too many people to properly govern?

Nah, just those two.

Actually I think the problem with health care in the US isn't a size issue, it's an ideological one. There is a much stronger emphasis on going it alone and 'every man for himself' and not needing anyone, in America, whereas Europeans* think you're responsible for those around you, whether you know them or not.

If you notice, people who are militantly opposed to 'Obamacare' aren't against it because it doesn't hold up financially or something (they often say that, but you never get the impression they did the math or even read about someone doing the math); the real reason is that they're averse to the idea that someone undeserving might benefit from their money. "Why should I pay for someone else's lung cancer? Dumbass shouldn't have smoked." I'm sure you've seen that, oh, only a million times.

Americans still think of it as 'their' money, even once they hand it over to the insurance company. It's like the company is more or less a trustee, using your money to make your own little rainy-day-fund, kind of like your retirement plan. To Europeans, health insurance is more like a bet; you all throw money in and some will need a payout one day and others will not.

It's entirely possible Obamacare is expensive and inefficient and will need money pumped into it- I wouldn't know, but I find it likely, because I've never heard of a healthcare system that isn't. The reason it's meeting so much resistence isn't math, it's not the size of the country, it's in people's mindsets.

Allow me to demonstrate:

Mikey Go WOOGA wrote:

grmblfjx wrote:

Mikey Go WOOGA wrote:

A small amount of government support isn't necessarily a bad thing, but it is always going to waste some money.

We all know that it's impossible to make sure nobody gets a cent more than they totally deserve.
The difference is that the ebul European commies think that price is worth paying.

Don't be so hard on yourself. It's not because you're evil, it's because you're stupid.

...This, just applied to health care.



*the terms "Armericans" and "Europeans" used here to stand for the cultural sentiment, not for the individual. Don't you dare go nitpicking. ò.ó

grmblfjx wrote:

Actually I think the problem with health care in the US isn't a size issue, it's an ideological one. There is a much stronger emphasis on going it alone and 'every man for himself' and not needing anyone, in America, whereas Europeans* think you're responsible for those around you, whether you know them or not.

This is also true. I think it is both of these things.

grmblfjx wrote:

Americans still think of it as 'their' money, even once they hand it over to the insurance company. It's like the company is more or less a trustee, using your money to make your own little rainy-day-fund, kind of like your retirement plan.

Unless it's a company scheme being paid for out of their salary, in which case, strangely, it's the employer's money and they have a right to try and claim it back from you.

Strangely enough, the principles on which insurance companies operate is the same in the US and Europe. It's only people's perceptions that differ.
Insurance is a system where a lot of people make contributions to a pot which is then paid out to those of the contributors that need it, when they need it. It's the only way to both have affordable premiums and still be able too cover the costs.