Why, God why were these songs recorded

Reviving the classics yet again. Once again, this is your master thread to rant, bitch, piss and moan about the most vile, vapid, stomach-turning, rage-inducing songs ever to get recorded and released upon our unsuspecting ears. I'll start off with "Beautiful Girls" by Sean Kingston. :hair:

I don't know if Ben E. King is still alive. If he is, I wonder what he would say about this horrible use of his classic "Stand by Me". Half the time, Sean Kingston whines "SUICIDAL!" throughout the track. I can think of a better word: Homicidal. As in this song makes me homicidal.

But that was in 2007, however this junk still makes the rotation, and rears it's ugly head every now and then, along with it's equally horrible buddies "Do You Know" by Enrique Iglesias, and "Sorry" by Buckcherry.

How about you folks? What songs, old and new, do you wish never got recorded and released?

Ugh. I work in retail. I work in a hip youngster clothing store, and so they play everything that's "in."

And apparently what's "in" is some of the whiniest shit to ever hit the radio, I'll tell you what. I'm so fucking tired of listening to singers WHINE about EVERYTHING. On the rare occasions when they play an OK Go song or Mika or Jason Mraz, it is like the brightest moment of my day. How sad is that.

One song that I really. Really. Wish they would not play (and I really do hear this EVERY DAMN DAY without fail, sometimes twice in one shift), is this song called "Soulmate" by Natasha Beddingfield.

First of all, I know I'm a grammar tyrant and no one cares, but when you kick the English language in the face in your first two lines in a really half-assed attempt to rhyme, I am immediately leaning toward not liking your song.

"Incompatible -
It don't matter, though"

UGH. UGH UGH UGH.

Then there's the chorus. Which she wails over and over.

"Who doesn't long for someone to hold
Who knows how to love you without being told
Somebody tell me why I'm on my own
If there's a soulmate for everyone"

Okay, first of all, Natasha, who the hell told you there was a soulmate for everyone? They're deluding you. Some of us end up alone. Some of us don't need another person to validate our existences. Maybe you should whine about that instead of Fate not handing you your sexy man on a silver platter.

Second of all, maybe you should stop whining at all. It's not attractive. It's not helping you find "Mr. Lovable" [sic]. SHUT UP WHY DO YOU KEEP PLAYING THIS SONG AND WHY DO PEOPLE LIKE IT UGHHHH

One other song I hate is by Kelly Clarkson, and it's mostly because the chorus is just her YELLING things. That's the general impression I get from Kelly Clarkson, though. She has a beautiful voice, in my opinion, but it would be a lot more beautiful if she would stop screaming into the microphone. I know she's trying to sound pop-rock but bellowing

'CAUSE WE BELOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG TOGEEEEEEEEEEEEETHER NOW, YEEEEEEEAH
FOREVER UNIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITED HEEEEEEEEEERE SOMEHOW, YEAH
YOU GOT A PIEEEEEEEECE OF ME
AND HONESTLY
MY LIFE WOULD SUCK WITHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOUT YOUUUUUUUUUU

is just not attractive. Nor is it music to my ears. In fact, every time it comes on, I just want to go into the back room and plug my ears until it's over. STFU, Kelly Clarkson. YOU ARE CAPABLE OF MAKING GOOD MUSIC. I KNOW YOU ARE. SO DO IT.

InkWeaver wrote:

In fact, every time it comes on, I just want to go into the back room and plug my ears until it's over. STFU, Kelly Clarkson. YOU ARE CAPABLE OF MAKING GOOD MUSIC. I KNOW YOU ARE. SO DO IT.

The thing that bothers me about that song is how she goes on about how terrible they are for each other and then goes on singing about how her life would suck without him. Um... if you're terrible together, JUST GET OVER IT.

The song that really makes me grit my teeth every time it comes on is 3OH!3's stupid song about Helen Keller. It starts making no sense and gets worse. "Shoosh girl, shut your lips, do the Helen Keller and talk with your hips". WTF??

The sad thing is, that song bothers me because Helen Keller didn't talk with her hips. She talked with her hands.

/anal retentive

Solitia wrote:

The song that really makes me grit my teeth every time it comes on is 3OH!3's stupid song about Helen Keller. It starts making no sense and gets worse. "Shoosh girl, shut your lips, do the Helen Keller and talk with your hips". WTF??

I fucking hate that song.

It's so god damn annoying and it comes on all the fucking time.

Another stupid and annoying song is Halo by Beyonce. I seriously fucking hate that song. Repeating yourself over and over again in an obnoxious voice doesn't make a good song, so SHUT THE FUCK UP.

InkWeaver wrote:

One other song I hate is by Kelly Clarkson, and it's mostly because the chorus is just her YELLING things. That's the general impression I get from Kelly Clarkson, though. She has a beautiful voice, in my opinion, but it would be a lot more beautiful if she would stop screaming into the microphone. I know she's trying to sound pop-rock but bellowing

Sounds like Linkin Park. Watch, it's a PARODY!

Thanks for reminding me InkWeaver. I have heard that damn Kelly Clarkson song "My Life Would Suck Without You" so many times at work, and practically everywhere else, more times than I can count on both my hands. C'mon Red Robin! Play something funky and upbeat like "Get On Your Boots"!

As for "Soulmate" by Natasha Beddingfield, UGH!! How does that one always manage to get played every frakking TWO HOURS?! :suspect:

"I Do Not Hook Up" by Kelly Clarkson is also getting on my last nerve.:panic: :hair:

Katy fucking Perry's "I Kissed A Girl" is worthy of mention again. It actually makes me angry, and if it's on in a bar, I will stomp out for a cigarette swiftly.

I hate Rihanna's "Unfaithful"!!! Whenever it comes on I have to stop myself from screaming: "JUST FUCKING BREAK UP WITH HIM!" Honestly, it is such an idiotic song. If you can't stop cheating on him, and you know it's hurting him why not just end it? Seriously. And the putting the gun to his head. Worst. Metaphor. Ever.

lovedless wrote:

InkWeaver wrote:

One other song I hate is by Kelly Clarkson, and it's mostly because the chorus is just her YELLING things. That's the general impression I get from Kelly Clarkson, though. She has a beautiful voice, in my opinion, but it would be a lot more beautiful if she would stop screaming into the microphone. I know she's trying to sound pop-rock but bellowing

Sounds like Linkin Park. Watch, it's a PARODY!

AHAHAHAHAHA. That was great. Thanks for linking it! ^.^

Inciter wrote:

Another stupid and annoying song is Halo by Beyonce. I seriously fucking hate that song. Repeating yourself over and over again in an obnoxious voice doesn't make a good song, so SHUT THE FUCK UP.

I just heard that one today. It's not as bad as her other song "If I Were A Boy". SO. MUCH. HAET.

ZoZo wrote:

Katy fucking Perry's "I Kissed A Girl" is worthy of mention again. It actually makes me angry, and if it's on in a bar, I will stomp out for a cigarette swiftly.

What annoys me about the song besides the obvious trivializing of bisexuality and the line "it's not what good girls do" is that Katy Perry SHOUTS. EVERY. SINGLE. LINE. She isn't singing, and it doesn't make her sound brassy or brazen or anything. It just makes her sound like an untalented, obnoxious dumbass who wears carousels and pineapples.

OH MY GOD SERIOUSLY YOU PEOPLE.

The constant bitching about Katy Perry for no reason is fucking stupid. IT IS NOT TRIVILIALIZING BISEXUALITY. It is a song about the genuine reaction of someone experimenting with a semi-sexual relationship that they were taught was wrong (hence the "it's not what good girls do" line) and knowing that it is something new that they may not like, but they are interested in. She also does not yell.

I like a lot of the other songs you guys bitch about, but this one is one that you all go on and on about, and you're being overly sensitive about it and completely misinterpreting it. I'm sorry if not all people are born into the world completely accepting and understanding bisexuality and homosexuality, but for some people, it is something new and confusing and, occasionally, shaming, until they learn about it. She was singing about that experience.

GET THE FUCK OVER IT.

Hence the at the beginning. However, I see it as a fun rant type of dead horse beating.

Hell, I'm as a hardcore a fan of Duran Duran as they come, and yet, I could come here saying "DAMN IT! That's the third time in a week that I heard "Hungry Like The Wolf"!

But, I digress..... another song I'm really getting tired of hearing is "Not Meant to Be" by Theory of a Deadman. I like their other songs, but this one is too much teh whinez.

A_Note_Chaotic wrote:

OH MY GOD SERIOUSLY YOU PEOPLE.

The constant bitching about Katy Perry for no reason is fucking stupid. IT IS NOT TRIVILIALIZING BISEXUALITY. It is a song about the genuine reaction of someone experimenting with a semi-sexual relationship that they were taught was wrong (hence the "it's not what good girls do" line) and knowing that it is something new that they may not like, but they are interested in. She also does not yell.

I like a lot of the other songs you guys bitch about, but this one is one that you all go on and on about, and you're being overly sensitive about it and completely misinterpreting it. I'm sorry if not all people are born into the world completely accepting and understanding bisexuality and homosexuality, but for some people, it is something new and confusing and, occasionally, shaming, until they learn about it. She was singing about that experience.

GET THE FUCK OVER IT.

Thank you for your calm, collected and cool reply. It´s obvious your interpretation of the song is the only right one, and everybody else is wrong. I guess nobody could possibly, in some roundabout, farfetched way, see the song as somewhat frivolous about the whole bisexuality-thing, because that means that they... how did you put it? Ah, right. It means they're being 'overly sensitive'.
So. Yeah. Overly sensitive, as in, using all caps to get their point across?

Bad Luck Charm wrote:

But, I digress..... another song I'm really getting tired of hearing is "Not Meant to Be" by Theory of a Deadman. I like their other songs, but this one is too much teh whinez.

Is that the one where they're like, "IS THIS THE MOMENT WHERE I LOOK YOU IN THE EYE; FORGIVE MY BROKEN PROMISE THAT YOU'LL NEVER SEE ME CRY" -- oh wait no it's apparently some guy named David Cook. I get that one and Not Meant To Be mixed up 'cause they're equally whiny.

"It's never enough to say I love you
No, it's never enough to say I try
It's hard to believe that's there's
No way out for you and me
And it seems to be,
The story of our life"

Ooooh right. That one. Yeah, after that particular verse, I sort of want to sit down with a cup of tea with that guy, look him in the eye, and say, "Dude, she sounds kinda like a douche bag. Which is no fault of yours, but hey, if she's a douche, you should probably dump her. Just sayin'."

I don't think Katy Perry trivializes bisexuality, I just think she's an untalented, flash-in-the-pan annoyance.

LEAVE KATY PERRY ALOOOONE! SHE'S A HUMAN BEING!

Personally, I'm sick of the song "Before He Cheats" by Carrie Underwood. It's all over the radio, country and pop!

Jay/Cris wrote:

A_Note_Chaotic wrote:

OH MY GOD SERIOUSLY YOU PEOPLE.

The constant bitching about Katy Perry for no reason is fucking stupid. IT IS NOT TRIVILIALIZING BISEXUALITY. It is a song about the genuine reaction of someone experimenting with a semi-sexual relationship that they were taught was wrong (hence the "it's not what good girls do" line) and knowing that it is something new that they may not like, but they are interested in. She also does not yell.

I like a lot of the other songs you guys bitch about, but this one is one that you all go on and on about, and you're being overly sensitive about it and completely misinterpreting it. I'm sorry if not all people are born into the world completely accepting and understanding bisexuality and homosexuality, but for some people, it is something new and confusing and, occasionally, shaming, until they learn about it. She was singing about that experience.

GET THE FUCK OVER IT.

Thank you for your calm, collected and cool reply. It´s obvious your interpretation of the song is the only right one, and everybody else is wrong. I guess nobody could possibly, in some roundabout, farfetched way, see the song as somewhat frivolous about the whole bisexuality-thing, because that means that they... how did you put it? Ah, right. It means they're being 'overly sensitive'.
So. Yeah. Overly sensitive, as in, using all caps to get their point across?

No, it's not the only way it can be interpreted, but that's the way the song was intended. Sometimes, I post in all caps because otherwise, people just skim past. Also, I had a bad day and I was being a douche. This happens on the internets. If everyone else can be a dick most of the time, I should be able to do it some of the time.

Who are you, by the way? I don't recognise your username.

Narwhal wrote:

I don't think Katy Perry trivializes bisexuality, I just think she's an untalented, flash-in-the-pan annoyance.

I'm totally fine with that. I am just tired of people going on about the trivializing bisexuality thing because it's a) completely last year, and b ) really stupid.

A_Note_Chaotic wrote:

No, it's not the only way it can be interpreted, but that's the way the song was intended.

Well, I don't think there's ever been much doubt about that. But just because something is intended a certain way doesn't mean people are going to hear it that way.

A_Note_Chaotic wrote:

No, it's not the only way it can be interpreted, but that's the way the song was intended. Sometimes, I post in all caps because otherwise, people just skim past. Also, I had a bad day and I was being a douche. This happens on the internets. If everyone else can be a dick most of the time, I should be able to do it some of the time.

Who are you, by the way? I don't recognise your username.

And your post is just that important that people skimming over it is unacceptabubble.

anangrychocobo wrote:

A_Note_Chaotic wrote:

No, it's not the only way it can be interpreted, but that's the way the song was intended. Sometimes, I post in all caps because otherwise, people just skim past. Also, I had a bad day and I was being a douche. This happens on the internets. If everyone else can be a dick most of the time, I should be able to do it some of the time.

Who are you, by the way? I don't recognise your username.

And your post is just that important that people skimming over it is unacceptabubble.

Exactly. :teach:

I don't know. I liked her album alright.

But then, my tastes are not everybody's. I'm cool with that.

The song that has been driving me up the wall is 311's "Hey You". This has nothing to do with stupid lyrics and rhyming arrangement, my normal irk, and everything to do with 311. Strictly speaking, I hate them. I've hated them since they wrote that gawdawful "Amber" song. The singer cannot sing. He just speaks in tune with the words, and he has the most nasally, smokey sound to his voice.

I feel this is more of a "Why Was This Band Signed" though.

Bad Luck Charm wrote:

I don't know if Ben E. King is still alive. If he is, I wonder what he would say about this horrible use of his classic "Stand by Me". Half the time, Sean Kingston whines "SUICIDAL!" throughout the track. I can think of a better word: Homicidal. As in this song makes me homicidal.

Have you heard Bayside's cover of it? [You must be registered and logged in to see this link.]

It is one of my all-time favorite songs ^.^