Twilight: The Death of Feminism

I'd also like to point out that the real draw in these books is not the fact that Edward is perfect and gorgeous. The draw is that Edward is perfect and gorgeous and obsessed with the Mary-Sue self-insert character. These books are nothing more than a narcissistic fantasy. The eroticism is derived from the man's obsession with the woman, not the woman's obsession with the man. Ask any of the fans. Edward is at his "hottest" when he's being "protective" because he simply can't bear to lose her and must gaze upon her as she sleeps and blah blah blah.

Bella (a.k.a. any loser reading this stupid fucking book) is lauded as being more intelligent than her peers, beautiful but OH SO HUMBLE at the same time, and lusted after by every guy that looks at her. All the girls want to be her friend so that they can be popular. All the cute boys and even some of the ugly ones want to ask her to the school dance. She so Sueper Special that she manages to melt the ice around Edward's heart and earns his undying devotion and obsession. He wants her so bad that it's a constant struggle for him not to drain her dry or, metaphors aside, sex her up.

Meyer squawks on about choices and the importance of them, but at the end of the series Bella has her cake and eats it too. She has a beautiful baby that she doesn't really have to work hard to take care of and won't be saddled with for long, she can still associate with her friend Jacob, and she becomes an insanely powerful and beautiful vampire. She never has to worry about growing up. She never has to worry about things like college and aging and money and what she's going to do with her life. Hell, she doesn't even have a hard time resisting human blood. Everything is tied up with a neat little bow and she gets to spend the rest of eternity worshipping and being worshipped by Edward.

The real thrill for these girls is the idea that somebody so powerful is stupidly in love with the Bella Suit and whatever reader is wearing it in her fantasies. Meyer has written the ultimate self-indulgent daydream. The more I think about it, the more I realize that the sexism is almost incidental. Meyer is so hideously immature that this is her ultimate fantasy. Being young, beautiful, completely without responsibility, and the center of some gorgeous man's universe. Wouldn't that seem like an exciting prospect to you if you were a put-upon Mormon housewife raising a litter of kids?

She has four sons and some boring-ass husband that she met when she was a child. It's obvious she was a total knockout when she was younger and is very self-conscious about the fact that she's aging. But Bella will never grow old and lose her beauty. Bella doesn't have to deal with dirty diapers and soccer practices and grocery store tantrums because Renesmee is fully self-aware and will only take 6 years to grow to maturity. Bella gets along famously with her husband's family, no shitty in-laws here. Bella doesn't have to make any decisions or do any work because Edward takes care of everything and has a fuck ton of money.

I think this series was her way of gilding her own cage. It's what her life would look like if she was allowed to play God for five minutes.

I almost have the urge to read that on camera and post it on You Tube just to see the wank that gets started.

I so want to, its that brilliant. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

Mythandariel wrote:

I almost have the urge to read that on camera and post it on You Tube just to see the wank that gets started.

I so want to, its that brilliant. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

DO IT!

ZoZo wrote:

Mythandariel wrote:

I almost have the urge to read that on camera and post it on You Tube just to see the wank that gets started.

I so want to, its that brilliant. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

DO IT!

May I mention that I am WGW member and Twihards retaliate at their own risk? I would love to watch the wank and flailing fits of fail.

Just don't make it sound like an Internet Tough Guy I DARE YOU FAGGOTS thing.

Mythandariel wrote:

ZoZo wrote:

Mythandariel wrote:

I almost have the urge to read that on camera and post it on You Tube just to see the wank that gets started.

I so want to, its that brilliant. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

DO IT!

May I mention that I am WGW member and Twihards retaliate at their own risk? I would love to watch the wank and flailing fits of fail.

Please do. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

Sigh.

[You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

The Air Force's relationship with the Twilight series is almost official now. FML.

I would like to wholeheartedly support the idea of Mythandariel reading out Narwhal's rant on YouTube, preferably with some background to give it context (i.e. part of/a summary of the exchange that led up to it).

Narwhal wrote:

Meyer has written the ultimate self-indulgent daydream.

Yes, everyone comments on how Bella was "born thirty, and gets more middle aged every year", which is really fucking convenient when you're a middle-aged author writing a teenage Mary Sue.

It's actually kind of funny when the mask slips. Like Bella having a sudden onset of mid-life crisis on her 18th birthday.

Hell, Bella even gets to have a daughter. According to the wikipedia article Meyer has 3 sons, not 4. My bad. But still, it fits.

Narwhal wrote:

Hell, Bella even gets to have a daughter. According to the wikipedia article Meyer has 3 sons, not 4. My bad. But still, it fits.

It's also another way to lash out at the patriarchy since daughters aren't normally viewed in the same light as sons are.

She's in way too deep to even acknowledge that there is a patriarchy. It's just more evidence that she uses these books as a way to build herself a better life.