Movies That are Going to Suck: Part Deux

You know what else worries me about the LA version of Akira. With Kaneda and Tetsuo as brothers, will they think this gives them the right to give Kaneda powers? He never had powers, although he still managed to fight Tetsuo, which was part of what made him awesome.

Unless you count being a stubborn bastard as being a power.

I don't mean to necropost, but Jason Statham and Robert DeNiro are working on a "Killer Elite" remake that's shaping up to be a "Gigli"-level flop.

Here are some of the less than flattering comments that have been posted about it at Comingsoon.net:

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Deniro is terrible anymore these days and Statham is the same guy in every movie. Pass.

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S I read the book, this is NOT the damn plot and NOT what really happened. They took a real life badass event and turned it into the transporter.

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Clive Owen as the villain, He's a horrible actor to begin with. This is going to end up as bad as Macgruber (Villain-wise, It was still a horrible movie to begin with).

They are making a second Percy Jackson movie . The first one was bad enough--they murdered Annabeth's character, and for Chrissake didn't even get her hair right--I don't want to see how badly they will butcher the second book. (Yeah, okay, PJO is a guilty pleasure of mine. It's like eating Nutella: not actual chocolate ice cream, but it still tastes pretty good.)
Why god why isn't the PJO movie franchise going the same way as the Eragon movie franchise?

Shubby the Lurkette wrote:

The first one was bad enough--they murdered Annabeth's character, and for Chrissake didn't even get her hair right--I don't want to see how badly they will butcher the second book.

Hair is such a staple of how true the movie has stayed to the books, innit? Thanks God they haven't chosen a cute actor to play the main character or they might -- oh, wait.

Shubby the Lurkette wrote:

They are making a second Percy Jackson movie

Well, i'm somewhat happy that they are even bothering putting Kronos, Ares, and Clarisee in it. But, now i'm scared what they are going to do to poor Tyson! And, if they even going to put Thalia in it at all.

Jay/Cris wrote:

Shubby the Lurkette wrote:

The first one was bad enough--they murdered Annabeth's character, and for Chrissake didn't even get her hair right--I don't want to see how badly they will butcher the second book.

Hair is such a staple of how true the movie has stayed to the books, innit? Thanks God they haven't chosen a cute actor to play the main character or they might -- oh, wait.

Hell, I'd have been fine with the whole brown hair thing if they hadn't failed so much at capturing Annabeth's Annabeth-ness. That was just the yicky icing on the cake of fail. She was so Faux-Action-Girl-y in that movie it hurt. Also, how they're going to finagle the whole dangerous-sixteenth-birthday thing when it appears Percy is already a sophomore is beyond me.
And if they put in Thalia and screw her up, by god I'll...well, honestly what I'll do is bitch about it, but a girl can fantasize, right?

Shubby the Lurkette wrote:

Also, how they're going to finagle the whole dangerous-sixteenth-birthday thing when it appears Percy is already a sophomore is beyond me.

Okay, I admit to not having read the books or seen the first movie. But this seems a really stupid thing to get worked up over. Sophomore year of high school does not automatically make someone sixteen years old. You may well be. Or you may be younger (I didn't turn 16 until after sophomore year, thankyouvermuch) or you may be older - people get held back, or end up being born right after the cutoff date for the school district, etc. Same goes for driving courses given during sophomore year - some states/school districts make you wait until you're of age for a license, others simply start instructing you if you're old enough to have a permit.

But again, I haven't read the books, so maybe there is more of a reason for this to be such a huge deal.

^I'm not saying he already has to be sixteen, but the books take place over I think four years. The last book is about his sixteenth birthday--in the first one he's twelve. So in this one he looks about fifteen, but since he's only at the Lightning Thief adventure that means there are four more books' worth of plot to cram into about a year, movie-time.

Sparrow wrote:

Shubby the Lurkette wrote:

Also, how they're going to finagle the whole dangerous-sixteenth-birthday thing when it appears Percy is already a sophomore is beyond me.

Okay, I admit to not having read the books or seen the first movie. But this seems a really stupid thing to get worked up over. Sophomore year of high school does not automatically make someone sixteen years old. You may well be. Or you may be younger (I didn't turn 16 until after sophomore year, thankyouvermuch) or you may be older - people get held back, or end up being born right after the cutoff date for the school district, etc. Same goes for driving courses given during sophomore year - some states/school districts make you wait until you're of age for a license, others simply start instructing you if you're old enough to have a permit.

But again, I haven't read the books, so maybe there is more of a reason for this to be such a huge deal.

This. I was 15 when I was a high school sophomore.

Hey, you know what I read online? That Sonic Fa Film that the creators thought was damn near greenlighted? Apparently it's been totally pulled because Sega in Japan has finally decided to make a real one.

You know, a good one, not the first animation.

As long as it's not based on Sonic X okay...

But I have deep fear lodged deep in my chest... Deep fear that it won't live up to my expectations... that it won't be made...

THAT IT WON'T HAVE SHADOW...

Ahem... yeah, whatever...

Harley Quinn hyenaholic wrote:

THAT IT WON'T HAVE SHADOW...

This would be a good thing. Shadow is the very worst "evil version" of a character ever created. Examples of this character archetype that are better than Shadow include:

* the million or so "evil" versions of characters whose names are the hero's name in reverse
* the Game Antithinker
* Waluigi
* and many more

TheHermit wrote:

* the million or so "evil" versions of characters whose names are the hero's name in reverse

Naitsirhc not included, I suppose.

Shadow's not evil any more, and he angsts less. He's got his own personality now. Very much 'for himself', and screw the world, and 'Sonic, I'm still better than you'. But he's lost his evil streak. He's got a personality.

Damn...I was really looking forward to the fan film. Mostly because they got for the voice of Sonic...

JALEEL WHITE!!!

Seriously! For old school fans like myself, that was awesome! Not as awesome as when that fan series of Star Trek managed to make an episode starring George Takei...but still awesome!

Not looking forward to Dark of the Moon.

Transformers rocked! It was by far the best film of the three, and they got rid of the bitch! Yay. The new one's okay.

I really liked it.

The Scientist wrote:

Transformers rocked! It was by far the best film of the three, and they got rid of the bitch! Yay. The new one's okay.

I really liked it.

But they replaced her with an even dumber, uglier/skankier bitch?

I highly doubt I'm going to think it's better than the first. What that had going for it was it's badass novelty and "this really isn't like anything else I've ever seen before". This will now be the third one I've seen so far, so it's got a lot more work to do and much to make up for. I found the second one so abysmal that my fondest memory of that movie experience was in fact the 3 hour wait to get into the theater.

She's not as annoying, though.... and I really like Shia, so there's that.

Michael Bay films are always dumb, but this one has Linkin Park in it.

I can hardly see how Linkin Park in it can make a film less annoying.

Yes, I like some of their music, but it's on a case-by-case basis.

Well, I'm a fan and I go to every gig of theirs I can, so that's that.

The Scientist wrote:

and I really like Shia, so there's that.

Never reproduce.

I only watched Transformers 2 for Skidz and Mudflap, seriously those two are kick-ass.

I might watch Transformers 3 when it comes out on DVD but only to see if the new actress is any better than Megan Fox. That, and I really like Shia's acting style.

4shadow, KELP is a better actress than Megan Fox.

Harley Quinn hyenaholic wrote:

4shadow, KELP is a better actress than Megan Fox.

I know I'm just hoping that they chose who actually knows how to express emotion this time. Also just call me Shadow, it's what I usually go by.

4shadowedice4 wrote:

I only watched Transformers 2 for Skidz and Mudflap, seriously those two are kick-ass.

WHAT.

I never want to be anywhere near you in my entire life oh my god those two were the most irritating things I've ever seen on screen