Things You've Learned from Badfic

Yeah, heh heh, tend to get the two words mix up.

It's so easy to fall in love with your rapist. Or in my case, just A rapist.

Like, OVER-FUCKING-NIGHT.

I forced it before, and what happened? Bloody Domination 2. Which I enjoyed, but both parts are enjoyed for the sex with minors, the contrived rescue from the dead, and the eventual Karma Kick, not some kind of deep and involving storyline.

Look at Beauty And The Beast (not exactly the same, but he did basically kidnap her) It took like, four months minimum for Belle to fall in love there. And it still feels fucked up sometimes.

Harley Quinn hyenaholic wrote:

Apparently the unarmed hero has a massive advantage over the asshole who is practiced with a shiv.

That's funny, because it happens a lot in films too. Watch the Mortal Kombat TV series if you get the chance...as soon as somebody picks up a weapon, you know they're going to lose the fight.

Quote :

It's so easy to fall in love with your rapist.

This is another one that comes from a film trope. In action-adventure films, if the heroic lead and the romantic interest know each other for half an hour and exchange as much as two lines of dialogue, you can pretty much guarantee that a full-on smooch fest will follow, especially if they start off hating each other - that just makes it even more likely.

I think the rationale is "You picked up a weapon against the unarmed guy. This means it's not a fair fight. You're cheating. You're the bad guy. BAD GUYS LOSE."

And while that's a nice, satisfying rationale, and we certainly get a kick out of watching the good guy win against impossible odds...

It's still pretty damn stupid.

King Bee wrote:

In slash, it's always important to emphasize how much one character is taller than their partner/boyfriend, even if they're only taller by a smidgen or in other cases, are actually the same height.

Oh god that. That's just so urgh especially in cases where you KNOW the logic can't work with the characters you've seen on the show. ]

I recently dealt with a particularly stupid Gundam Wing fic that kept stressing how much bigger Heero's hand was compared to widdle ladylike delicate Duo's... which only made me think of Heero having acromegalia since they are exactly the same height in canon. (both are also very short, which made all the references to Heero's manly proportions all the more laughable)

The 'chick' in a gay relationship (and there always is one) is always the smaller more delicate one. Or in Sonic, it's always Shadow cus he's the emo.

Not really badfic but just something annoying as fuck that I've been seeing in pornfic in general. Authors seem to have an aversion to using the words 'vagina', 'clit/etc.', 'labia' when describing female genitalia. Every time I see 'her sex' instead of this drives me bonkers; wetness and slickness I can tolerate sine they haven't been used as widely as far as I've seen/read. I will admit I've seen more use of 'length/shaft' for males than penis or dick, but seriously? Why do this?

Well clit and labia are alright in my book but vagina feels really clinical. And penis just sounds silly. It is real hard to find words that will keep the mood going if you are going for srsly erotic.

"Her sex" is pretty awful tho.

Yeah, in romantic fanfic it's tough to find a word that tops 'cunt' or 'pork organ'.

Reepicheep-chan wrote:

It is real hard to find words that will keep the mood going if you are going for srsly erotic.
.

I think the right word use depends on taste. Some people might find correct terms too clinical and dry, while others will think any metonymy at all is silly. Some want direct descriptions of what's happening, others find them gross and prefer their stories to just imply positions and movements while concentrating on feelings.

I think our difficulty in expressing sexuality in prose might have something to do with our cultural hangups regarding sex, but I'd like to know if there's any literature on the matter.

Capital Murder is better than a dozen roses and a gallon of Spanish Fly. Totes.

- If you're a female and you stand so much as 1 millimeter away from your love interest, you will immediately and randomly be attacked and almost raped by a guy or guys.

- No matter how "tough" or "strong" or "a fighter" your OFC is, she will immediately be overpowered by a potential rapist.

- Being grabbed by the wrist or the upper arm is the easiest way for someone to forget how to fight.

No orifice needs lubrication. You could just shove your eight foot dick into someone and it won't have any negative effects ever.

There is no such thing as the clitoris, and in some cases, no such thing as vaginas at all.

Men can sleep with men, first time, and no stretching or lube is needed. And there's never, never any shit up that asshole. Clean as a whistle up there, every time.

Women douche with all sorts of shit on a regular basis, from strawberry yogurt to spritz.

[quote="Summercorn"]Men can sleep with men, first time, and no stretching or lube is needed.  And there's never, never any shit up that asshole.  Clean as a whistle up there, every time.[/quote]

I was going to make a parody this trope once; now I wonder if it would be seen as gross though...that and farting/ or just the "X/Y never poops/etc." in general. Want to write a romance fic that parodies the OC/Canon char cliches...I have quite a few ideas and this was one of them. Still...that would be going too far, right?

Kakashifan727 wrote:

Summercorn wrote:

Men can sleep with men, first time, and no stretching or lube is needed.  And there's never, never any shit up that asshole.  Clean as a whistle up there, every time.

I was going to make a parody this trope once; now I wonder if it would be seen as gross though...that and farting/ or just the "X/Y never poops/etc." in general. Want to write a romance fic that parodies the OC/Canon char cliches...I have quite a few ideas and this was one of them. Still...that would be going too far, right?

Not too far at all. Haven't you seen the shit some people write?

No...scat freaks me out. I don't go looking for that stuff; but farting and referencing the fact that people do poop (like dicks being slightly covered in poo after anal) doesn't bother me since that's just normal. Covering yourself in the stuff, ingesting it, or other that I don't know would probably disgust me.

That and the way I have it planned in my head is to start off as a cute little erotic scene, like first time doing anal or some shit, then embarrassment because of accidental gas. Extra exaggerated reactions from the characters and all that. Then again, I'm not that great at parodies; I've tried several times but can't seem to get the humor down when I'm being 'subtle' in referencing things.

Nobody's saying you're gonna be whistle-clean after some anal, but nobody needs to know about it.

I prefer blood on my anal anyway!