Things You've Learned from Badfic

Mouse wrote:

Nerdanel wrote:

As of 1888, there were slave plantations with black slaves in England. The Scotland Yard chased after runaway slaves with dogs. Abolitionists kept safe houses for the escaped slaves and had an underground railway to, I don't know, Scotland?

Are you fucking kidding me?! What fandom is this anyway? Because that is truly fail-tastic.

It's a real fic, and the fandom is Kuroshitsuji. I think I should try to find that fic again, as I think it would provide excellent snarking material. It's a Mary Sue fic too. And yes, the author bragged about her awesome historical accuracy.

Nerdanel wrote:

Mouse wrote:

Nerdanel wrote:

As of 1888, there were slave plantations with black slaves in England. The Scotland Yard chased after runaway slaves with dogs. Abolitionists kept safe houses for the escaped slaves and had an underground railway to, I don't know, Scotland?

Are you fucking kidding me?! What fandom is this anyway? Because that is truly fail-tastic.

It's a real fic, and the fandom is Kuroshitsuji. I think I should try to find that fic again, as I think it would provide excellent snarking material. It's a Mary Sue fic too. And yes, the author bragged about her awesome historical accuracy.

We have a thread for things like this. It's called the Horrible Histories thread.

It's really terrible, though.

ViewSonic wrote:

Nerdanel wrote:

Mouse wrote:

Nerdanel wrote:

As of 1888, there were slave plantations with black slaves in England. The Scotland Yard chased after runaway slaves with dogs. Abolitionists kept safe houses for the escaped slaves and had an underground railway to, I don't know, Scotland?

Are you fucking kidding me?! What fandom is this anyway? Because that is truly fail-tastic.

It's a real fic, and the fandom is Kuroshitsuji. I think I should try to find that fic again, as I think it would provide excellent snarking material. It's a Mary Sue fic too. And yes, the author bragged about her awesome historical accuracy.

We have a thread for things like this. It's called the Horrible Histories thread.

It's really terrible, though.

Well, you know if schools in the US are still using outdated and bogus curriculum about Christopher Colombus, then sure, build all of the underground railways to Scotland that you want.

Hey, Nerdanel. Did the author honest-to-God think that the Underground Railroad was, you know, underground? Or a railroad? Because that would be even more hilarious.

A girls in living in the 1950s/1960s wore T-shirts, leather jackets, and torn skinny jeans as oppose to blouses, skirts, dresses, and sweater vests.

ViewSonic wrote:

Hey, Nerdanel. Did the author honest-to-God think that the Underground Railroad was, you know, underground? Or a railroad? Because that would be even more hilarious.

A couple of years ago, one of the students at the high school I work for was doing a project on the Underground Railroad. She was very frustrated with not being able to find any pictures of the tracks. (This is what happens when you download your paper off the Internet instead of doing your own research.)

ViewSonic wrote:

Hey, Nerdanel. Did the author honest-to-God think that the Underground Railroad was, you know, underground? Or a railroad? Because that would be even more hilarious.

Actually, no. I got the impression that the author had learned about slavery in her American History class just recently, but failed to understand that those old-timey things might not have been the same everywhere in the universe.

Or maybe she thought the Victorian London was in Alabama or something. I don't know.

Nerdanel wrote:

ViewSonic wrote:

Hey, Nerdanel. Did the author honest-to-God think that the Underground Railroad was, you know, underground? Or a railroad? Because that would be even more hilarious.

Actually, no. I got the impression that the author had learned about slavery in her American History class just recently, but failed to understand that those old-timey things might not have been the same everywhere in the universe.

Or maybe she thought the Victorian London was in Alabama or something. I don't know.

It would still be History Fail, because slavery was abolished in the U.S. in 1865.

Lady Anne wrote:

Nerdanel wrote:

Or maybe she thought the Victorian London was in Alabama or something. I don't know.

It would still be History Fail, because slavery was abolished in the U.S. in 1865.

It could also have been canon research fail. Maybe she didn't realize that her story was taking place in the autumn of 1888 based on the canonical events to which her Mary Sue added herself. As far as I remember, I don't think the exact year was mentioned until quite late in the anime, although since Episode 4 the year would have been easy to figure out with a brief look at Wikipedia. But well, maybe she assumed Jack the Ripper was a fictional character.

(I think the most likely answer is that she was completely ignorant of both 1865 and 1888, among many other things.)

Lady Anne wrote:

Nerdanel wrote:

ViewSonic wrote:

Hey, Nerdanel. Did the author honest-to-God think that the Underground Railroad was, you know, underground? Or a railroad? Because that would be even more hilarious.

Actually, no. I got the impression that the author had learned about slavery in her American History class just recently, but failed to understand that those old-timey things might not have been the same everywhere in the universe.

Or maybe she thought the Victorian London was in Alabama or something. I don't know.

It would still be History Fail, because slavery was abolished in the U.S. in 1865.

Maybe she reasoned that it must have taken longer to spread to the rest of the world, especially since the English are all evil. I don't know much about the anime, but is slavery even mentioned in it, at all?

Also, I doubt it would have been called "underground railroad" because we don't say "railroad" in the UK. We never use that term. We call it the "railWAY", we get the "train" to places, and we follow the "rail tracks". Never the "railroad".

In fact, this reminds me of another common thing I've learned from fanfiction: every country in the world uses American spelling and terminology for everything! English cars have "licence plates" (instead of "number plates" or "reg numbers"), we drive on the "highway" (instead of "motorway") and we use "cell phones" (instead of "mobile phones"). Not only that, but uniquely American brand names like "Hot Topic" can be found available everywhere in the world.

Cunovendus wrote:

Lady Anne wrote:

Nerdanel wrote:

ViewSonic wrote:

Hey, Nerdanel. Did the author honest-to-God think that the Underground Railroad was, you know, underground? Or a railroad? Because that would be even more hilarious.

Actually, no. I got the impression that the author had learned about slavery in her American History class just recently, but failed to understand that those old-timey things might not have been the same everywhere in the universe.

Or maybe she thought the Victorian London was in Alabama or something. I don't know.

It would still be History Fail, because slavery was abolished in the U.S. in 1865.

Maybe she reasoned that it must have taken longer to spread to the rest of the world, especially since the English are all evil. I don't know much about the anime, but is slavery even mentioned in it, at all?

Also, I doubt it would have been called "underground railroad" because we don't say "railroad" in the UK. We never use that term. We call it the "railWAY", we get the "train" to places, and we follow the "rail tracks". Never the "railroad".

In fact, this reminds me of another common thing I've learned from fanfiction: every country in the world uses American spelling and terminology for everything! English cars have "licence plates" (instead of "number plates" or "reg numbers"), we drive on the "highway" (instead of "motorway") and we use "cell phones" (instead of "mobile phones"). Not only that, but uniquely American brand names like "Hot Topic" can be found available everywhere in the world.

This is further complicated by American phrasing becoming more common in English speech. When I hear English people saying "You do the math", I want to rip their kneecaps off.

I did once offer to Anglo-check a Harry Potter fanfiction. To be fair, the writer was actually good and was trying hard on the details - she just came up with a few turns of phrase that no English person would ever use. Badfic writers, on the other hand, will either not bother, or chuck in every random English reference they've ever heard of (secure in their knowledge that everyone in the UK is either a member of the nobility or a cockney sparrow, we all live in London and dress entirely in tweed).

Cunovendus wrote:

Maybe she reasoned that it must have taken longer to spread to the rest of the world, especially since the English are all evil. I don't know much about the anime, but is slavery even mentioned in it, at all?

There is indeed slavery in the anime, "The Maiden Tribute of Modern Babylon" style, entirely illegal and very much underground. (The things you can find in stuff classed as shounen...)

By the way, I found the fic in question. It had gained a new chapter, and in that chapter Ciel tells Ndele, our African heroine, that slavery had already been abolished in England. That's an utter and complete retcon, as is the claim in the author notes for that chapter that she had really been meaning for slavery to have been illegal all along. Chapter 1 shows otherwise, with the Scotland Yard officer talking about abolitionists and all.

I've been thinking that I probably should post the fic in New Releases.

Lady Anne wrote:

Nerdanel wrote:

ViewSonic wrote:

Hey, Nerdanel. Did the author honest-to-God think that the Underground Railroad was, you know, underground? Or a railroad? Because that would be even more hilarious.

Actually, no. I got the impression that the author had learned about slavery in her American History class just recently, but failed to understand that those old-timey things might not have been the same everywhere in the universe.

Or maybe she thought the Victorian London was in Alabama or something. I don't know.

It would still be History Fail, because slavery was abolished in the U.S. in 1865.

Unless they're convicts.

When I was writing with my asshole of a co-author I learnt something from him...

* Apparently the unarmed hero has a massive advantage over the asshole who is practiced with a shiv.

No. If you've got a weapon you have a GIGANTIC advantage over anybody unarmed, no matter how shitty your weapon is. Christ, you're punching with your fists, they're punching with their fist full of shiv; who's really going to win?

That guy fucking SUCKS at fight scenes. What the hell happened to tension and getting more development time with the hot nurse because you got injured? Goddamn ass-bandit...

Harley Quinn hyenaholic wrote:

If you've got a weapon you have a GIGANTIC advantage over anybody unarmed, no matter how shitty your weapon is. Christ, you're punching with your fists, they're punching with their fist full of shiv; who's really going to win?

Uh... no. Pretty much every form of martial arts that has ever been invented is based on the fact that you can defeat a person with a weapon without having one yourself. It all depends on the relative strengths and skills of those involved.

Weapon-based martial arts > Unarmed martial arts.

Unarmed - damn good for defence.

Weapon-based - deadly

It pisses me off when the writer equates 'narrow dodging' with battle tension.

Harley Quinn hyenaholic wrote:

Weapon-based martial arts > Unarmed martial arts.

Unarmed - damn good for defence.

Weapon-based - deadly

No real argument about that, however, what you actually wrote and what I replied to was this.

Harley Quinn hyenaholic wrote:

If you've got a weapon you have a GIGANTIC advantage over anybody unarmed, no matter how shitty your weapon is.

The advantage only applies if your opponent's skill level is low enough not to compensate for you being armed. It does not apply to 'anybody unarmed', particularly if you don't know how to use the weapon in question. It is not an absolute.

I guess you're right. However... it was Sonic vs Shadow. They're supposed to be on the same skill level. And the same goes in all badfic - when people are supposed to be on a similar skill level, and somebody suddenly gets a huge power boost JUST because they're the hero.

Thus, in badfic being the Hero makes you stronger than your enemy, regardless of their usual canon strength.

Ghost in the Machine wrote:

Harley Quinn hyenaholic wrote:

Weapon-based martial arts > Unarmed martial arts.

Unarmed - damn good for defence.

Weapon-based - deadly

No real argument about that, however, what you actually wrote and what I replied to was this.

Harley Quinn hyenaholic wrote:

If you've got a weapon you have a GIGANTIC advantage over anybody unarmed, no matter how shitty your weapon is.

Actually, what Harley wrote was

Harley Quinn hyenaholic wrote:

Apparently the unarmed hero has a massive advantage over the asshole who is practiced with a shiv.

Practiced is the key word there. Against someone with a knife who knows what they're doing, a skilled defender will get off about three blocks before getting cut. However, if you're "punching with a fistful of shiv" I'm taking you down with gauntlet fall and then stepping on your fingers.

Thanks for noticing, Cy. I'm not talking about a guy who just picked up a piece of glass off the floor, but the character was supposed to be used to improvised weapons. And my ex-co just had his 'hero' character defend easily, and indeed fight him to a relative draw.

He sucks at writing fights. He also sucks at writing sex because that's as dominant and one-sided as the fights. In fact he sucks at writing any character except for the 'Alpha Male' personality, and even that escalated into obnoxiousness. He can't pace a deep and meaningful relationship; hell, he couldn't pace what should have been an increasingly abusive relationship without blowing off all the worst stuff straight away.

And that's the sort of thing that I've learnt. In badfic, the power of heroism will make battles a breeze for you, and every sexual encounter is equally as awesome as the one before.

I'm so glad I'm rid of him.

Harley Quinn hyenaholic wrote:

Thanks for noticing, Cy. I'm not talking about a guy who just picked up a piece of glass off the floor, but the character was supposed to be used to improvised weapons.

We-ell, define "used to improvised weapons". Had the character ever had any proper training? Someone can be "used to" improvised bladed weapons and still have basically one move - say, an overarm downward stabbing action. That could serve them very well, until they encounter someone who actually knows some martial arts, and then all of a sudden they're on the floor and their knife-arm's being broken.

If a person gets raped, they've been unfaithful to their twu wuv (unless said twu wuv is the rapist; then the rape will make them fall in love).   

Lady Anne wrote:

If a person gets raped, they've been unfaithful to their twu wuv (unless said twu wuv is the rapist; then the rape will make them fall in love).   

Just like in the Bible.

In slash, it's always important to emphasize how much one character is taller than their partner/boyfriend, even if they're only taller by a smidgen or in other cases, are actually the same height.

King Bee wrote:

In slash, it's always important to empathize how much one character is taller than their partner/boyfriend, even if they're only taller by a smidgen or in other cases, are actually the same height.

Empathize? Do you mean emphasize?