Dr. Who Fic - 10th Doctor

Compassion by Tennant'sWolfofGallifrey

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Felicia was a small girl with a unique look about her. Her hair was stark against her pale skin and her green eyes often gazed off into the distance often. Images of brightly colored skies and citadel's always ran through her mind. On nights like these she didn't have time to paint, but she was always up for a night out. The rave they were at bustled with young people of all kinds from the city.

How often do her green eyes often gaze off into the distance often? I thought it was weird that stationary things like skies and citadels were running through her head until she mentioned she was at a rave. Kid's obviously on drugs.

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"That's fine. I think I'm going to step out for a minute, splitting headache," she said motioning to her head.

No shit, Felicia. Where else would your headache be?

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I'm the Doctor by the way. Judging by your facial expression and body I'd say I've landed in Earth's 21st Century, which is odd because you sort of smell different. A bit like time itself…" he advanced towards her.

The Doctor can judge what century he's in by facial expression and body type? He's not going by clothes or surroundings? That's...impressive. She smells like "time itself?" So she smells like an old person's house?

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He grabbed her hand, "What the hell-" he put her hand against his chest and she felt two heart beats, her eyes widened as she looked down at his chest, "What the hell..."

She should've been scared of him, but she wasn't. She was attracted to him...

"Two hearts inside of one man, should be impossible right?" He asked with a particularly wide smile gracing his face.

Felicia had no idea what to do except push her hands harder into his chest and let the awe she felt frame her features.

"It's like music…"

No, no, her first reaction of "what the hell" was correct, because a strange man just calling himself "The Doctor" grabbing her and putting her hands on his chest is weird and creepy. I also want to fix the sentence to "Felicia had no idea what to do except push her hands harder into his chest and chant KALI MA!"

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He was quite beautiful and he had those flecks in his eyes, just like her. He needed to get her to open her mind to him and humans were so susceptible to emotional connections, but if she turned out to be a lady of his people he would want to be connected to her forever. He needed to link with her mind and be able to force the energy back about her, so he kissed her. He kissed her with everything he had left inside of him and he nearly sobbed as she brought her hips closer to his.

Jeebus, Doctor, rapey much? He wants to open her mind and force energy inside her?

Second chapter starts with them *taking a cab back to her place*...because the TARDIS is just not cool enough I guess?

Wait. What? Okay, I'll admit that Ten was never exactly my favorite Doctor, but neither was he the sort who'd be likely to pick up strange girls outside clubs and start making out with them. What happened to Rose? Or even Martha or Donna?

Also, I'm laying odds right now this girl is a Time Lady and doesn't know it. Why else would she be having visions that sound a lot like Gallifrey before it was destroyed?

You know, in the series, Nine made it fairly explicit that he was the only survivor of Gallifrey after the TimeWar. But this chick is at least the 3,459th self-insert Time Lord/Lady who managed to survive as well. At this point, there should be enough of them around to repopulate Gallifrey again.

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Judging by your facial expression and body

Man, screw those Time Lords, always judging my body. Who do they think they are?

Chapter 2!

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"Left, on Hemming Way."

She looked curiously at him as he laughed loudly, distracted by the street name momentarily. He was an incredibly nice bloke, and he, shortly, thought about taking her to meet the famous writer. She hummed briefly suddenly understanding his thought process.

"Happiness in intelligent people is the rarest thing I know." She said.

The Doctor in the previous chapter has made just the reference that he's a Time Lord, with no specifics of what that actually means, yet Felicia figures out his EXACT thought process by just saying her street name. Add to this the Doctor is giggling in delight over what is really just a pun, and she's calling him intelligent. Kid, you're bringing a strange man home, so what does that make you?

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She winked at him and turned to the driver, to inform him to stop at the red car. He did and she tossed some cash with a bit of extra, then climbed out of the cab with The Doctor. He laced his fingers with hers and immediately felt like he could take a deep breath. She pulled him towards her door and let go of his hand as she unlocked the door. As she stepped in she walked to the side to remove her shoes and throw her keys into a little bin atop the table in front.

I'm SO glad we have these little details, because otherwise we wouldn't have any idea about how they paid the driver, got out of the car, opened the door to the house, where she put her shoes, and then put her keys. BUT DID SHE LOCK THE DOOR BEHIND HER?

But get ready for the sexay:

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She cut him off by bringing his lips to hers once more, then she pulled away long enough to say, "I want you... Take me, Doctor."

That was enough for him, he wrapped his arms around her and she wrapped hers around him. He was so skinny, but she could feel the muscle. He pulled her closer and his right hand twisted into her chocolate brown hair, with blonde streaks, as his tongue tangled with hers. He pushed her against a wall and Felicia groaned as The Doctor pressed into her body, more. Her hands buried themselves into the back pockets of his suit and she felt something, which seemed to gravitate towards her hand. She pulled it out curiously as the Doctor rested his forehead against hers. It was glowing yellow in her hand and it was beautiful.

I bet you could feel the muscle, Felicia. Sigh, of course the author is going to take time out to describe the heroine's hair at this point. Not only does this girl have flecks of gold in her eyes, but brown hair with blondes streaks.

Ugh, so she felt around his ass and something came out, and it was beautiful?

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"A box? I thought you were a Lord…" Her hand came up to trace his cheekbones as she rested her head against the wall.

"I am... It's a bigger on the inside kind of box." His hands went up the back of her shirt as he un-clipped her bra within one snap.

"My box is bigger on the inside too, Doctor", said Felicia seductively. "Ever hear the phrase 'throwing a hotdog down a hallway'", she said with a smirk.

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"You'll have to show me the box."

"We have time later for the wonders of the world, beautiful."

Yeah, that Doctor; he's always putting off adventures in favor of one-night-stands.

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He suddenly picked her up bridal style and felt his hearts swell when she giggled.

"Nooo, giggling exacerbates my Congestive Heart Failure, Felicia! It's a Time Lord thing!"

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He hadn't said anything to her, and the air grew rather nervous before he finally got the bloody knot undone and threw his tie with the jacket.

Taken out of context, it seems this tale took a sinister turn...

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but brown hair with blondes streaks.

The way this is written leads me to believe that she stole the streaks from women who were actually blonde. Somewhere out there are dozens of blonde women with big patches missing.

Also "the air grew rather nervous'? So the air is sentient now?