The Badfic Contest to End All Badfic Contests (EXTENDED TO SEPT 1)

My first chapter is up. (Should I link to it, or keep it secret?)

Keep it secret and see if someone sporks it

Keith Fraser wrote:

grmblfjx wrote:

OR you could give him a girlfriend and they both come to realize that ghey buttsexx is much better than stupid girls. Complete with wangsting over "it's so wrong, but it feels so good!!!"

Ooh, I can use that to link the two plotlines. Arcee is Optimus' girlfriend so Hot Rod thinks he'll never have a chance with her, but then he sees Optimus and Megatron together. What should he do?!

Oh yes, the evergreen High School AU/Everybody is Gay combo. A double dose of fail before it's even written.

To be honest, it's about time someone around here started a badfic contest, we're supposed to be the experts, right? I've seen them held elsewhere and most of the entries actually weren't that bad.

I'm surprised to see "Slave Fic" didn't make the list but I then suppose it comes under the "Stockholm Syndrome" category.

Okay, I guess I'll share mine:

FF.net Username:

EbonyGothicky

Fandom:

Harry Potter

Tropes:

Popular Character and Troubled/Badass/Nerdy Character Fall in Love
Cutter!fic
Mates/Mating Season
Character X is Inexplicably a Vampire/Werewolf
Healing!Sex

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Quote :

He was naked to the waist, sweat gleaming upon his bare white chest like tiny pearls, dewing his body hair with tiny jewels.

EHL. OH. EHL.

Wat?! What is this crap? Waiting 2 days to post?! JEEZ! Stupid fanfiction.net. Hmph.

EDIT: Ok. Well, I just changed one of my old accounts' names. It should work, and Linky!

Full Circle (jerk)

Okay, guys, here I am. [You must be registered and logged in to see this link.]

I should be able to post my Twilight fanfic in two days. =D

Ok, Ink, I'm totally stealing the template for your profile to make a suitably bad one myself. :D

Well, if you insist, here's mine:
I uh, am also not in this to win. Being as I can choose my own title at will and all. The whole idea just looks like a lot of fun, and come on, potential publicity?
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You know, I googled for those stupid "copy this to your profile" things. I came across this:

Quote :

If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day, so I never have to live without you. - Winnie The Pooh

Ok, that's cute. It's also retarded. What if you're a year younger?

Hurm, er, crap. I might have lost already. I used one of my old accounts that I never did anything with to post instead of waiting the 2 days. I guess I'm disqualified. Ah, well. :-/

Maximilia, just delete it and start again. No problem.

Oh Jesus. I must do this, I must! Tonight after painting is done I'll get the account up and linkied.

I made an awesome account, and have written my first chapter. Now I just need to wait until I can post it. In the meantime, I think I'll pretty up my profile and decide what sorts of crazy I'll gradually add to my story. Fun stuff!

Narwhal wrote:

Maximilia, just delete it and start again. No problem.

Yah, I figured that out while I was cleaning. I've been having a NUUUUUUR weekend. Been really busy.

ANYWAY...here's the new profile, and I"m waiting 2 days now. *siiiiiigh*

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OK, I created my profile. I wasn't sure I could pull of the TF slash high school AU, as I haven't written slash before (although that might be all to the good), so I came up with a new idea:

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FF.net Username: Firebreathing Ninja From Space

Fandom: Harry Potter

Tropes: Misplaced Historical Fiction, Healing!Sex, Thin Line Between Love and Hate; possibly Eating Disorders and/or Character X is Inexplicably a Vampire/Werewolf.

Premise: Set in feudal Japan. Harry is a samurai, Draco is a ninja, and they're deadly enemies on opposite sides of a war. Hermione is a geisha in love with both of them; she has to keep the fact that they both partake of her services a secret from both. She knows she should hate Draco, but he's just too damn sexy. HOW WILL IT END?! Also featuring Ginnybashing and Chobashing.

I figure since I managed to troll all of you guys once, I should be able to do this again (unless it was a fluke last time... oh please, I hope not).

FF.net Username: xXHimeSamaMaiXx - complete with retarded copypasta profile

Fandom: Avatar the Last Airbender

Tropes: Millionaire Playboy Meets Girl Next Door, Thin Line Between Love and Hate, Conniving Ex Tries to Break Up the Couple, Cutter!fic, possible Healing!Sex (might leave that for as a promise for "chapter 6" though).

It's done!!! :mwahaha:

FF.net Username: LydiaWitchet

Fandom: Kingdom Hearts

Tropes: Everyone Is Gay! Horrific Noncanon Childhood Abuse, Secret Baby, Mating Season, Character X is Inexplicably a Vampire/Werewolf, Rape Is Love, Stockholm Syndome, Healing!Sex.

Poor Sora thought he'd finally escaped. Going to boarding school at Paopu Academy means he no longer has to live with his abusive parents. Little does he know that he's walking into a new kind of torment--in the form of evil English teacher Sephiroth, who has his eye on him. Vampire Mating Season is coming up, you see, and Sephi has been deprived for so long. What will come of this illicit affair, and how will Sora hide it? Stay tuned to find out!!

Working title is 'Welcome to My Life'.

I have a suggestion, everyone. Make your account look legit -- fave some fanfics and authors.

I'm currently faving every Jacob/Renesmee fic that has over a hundred reviews. XD

This is awesome. I think I might do this. :D

OK, I am totally in!

FF.net Username: BadWolf1995

Fandom: Doctor Who

Tropes: Secret Baby, MPREG, Diary Style Narrative, Eating Disorders

One more question: Seeing as the fanbrats do it, is it OK if we review-whore like crazy? Obviously, I'm going to begin each "chappie" of my "ficcie" with a call for reviews, but are we allowed to hold our fics hostage for more reviews, or is this cheating a lot?

Well, ZoZo, people won't review unless they actually want to, and so long as it's other people reviewing, I don't see why not.

I have a question about reviewing as well. Is it okay to review other stories to make our socks more realistic, or is that cheating because the author may read our story as well?

I understand wanting to appear more realistic, but there seem to be so many ways to whore for votes.... I'll have to think on this one. I guess we can take it on a case-by-case basis? Like, if you leave a couple reviews for authenticity it's okay, but if we find out you're spamming the shit out of every story in that section to try and inflate your stats, that's not okay.

Yeah, I don't think reviewing other people's stories is a good idea. Especially because that can give you an advantage. It's not like fans will know if you haven't ever reviewed anything.