House of Succubus: AND LEWDNESS (NWS)

Zeiss: here's some snarking music [You must be registered and logged in to see this link.]
Delcat: Okay, here we go. Again, I don't know what the details are on this one--it says it's a commission, but I don't know if it was commissioned to be drawn or commissioned to be translated. Whatever the case, it's apparently fresh off the /d/ presses and ready to terrorize the world.
Zeiss: THE MONSTER CALLED /d/ IS ATTACKING THE CITY

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Delcat: I also have no idea what series this is, but freckle-girl scares the piss out of me.
Zeiss: Is this a Mike, Lu, & Og doujin?
Delcat: More like Dyke, Cooze, and Cock
Delcat: Which I admit is kind of reaching but what the hell kind of cuss starts with Og
Zeiss: Well, look, more banana tits!
Zeiss: Dickgirls and banana tits go hand in hand.
Delcat: Did I specifically state that there were dickgirls in this, or did you just feel it in your water?
Zeiss: It's /d/. I can put two and two together.
Delcat: I think the priestlady is feeling it in her water. Run, priestlady, run!

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Zeiss: Do priestesses piss holy water?
Delcat: No, they just turn water into urine.
Zeiss: ...Her vulva is bigger than her HEAD
Delcat: Speaking of piss, did I mention this doujinshi likes piss? Piss piss piss.
Zeiss: ...
Zeiss: this is going to be a fun one, isn't it?
Delcat: I warned you, man. I gave you all due warning.
Delcat: Unless I forgot a couple of kinks, which is entirely possible.
Delcat: I'm confused by the dialogue. "You don't mean, you want her to..." ...what?
Zeiss: We're on the second page and already the art is this bad
Delcat: At least there's a background. And lovingly detailed piss.
Zeiss: This honestly looks traced. Nothing looks like it's in any relation to anything else.
Delcat: I would not be surprised.

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Zeiss: I actually think the layout here is kind of cool.
Delcat: Hey, who left this naked girl lying on the steps? I could have broken my neck!
Zeiss: It's a shame about everything else.
Delcat: The layouts are...ambitious, to say the least.
Zeiss: So many questions.
Delcat: Wait until you see the next two pages. It's a splash! ...in more ways than one!
Zeiss: D=

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[url[http://yfrog.com/7872378906j[/url]

Zeiss: WHERE THE FUCK IS WALDO
Delcat: In the apartment below, banging on the ceiling with a broom. He hasn't slept in six years.
Zeiss: Someday, I'm going to cross across one of these where no one says "Move your hips more!" and I will be delighted
Delcat: It was about here that I started rushing to save the entire thing before the thread died.
Delcat: These women don't even have hips, they just have a pair of beachballs stapled to a spine.
Zeiss: HEY WAITAMINUTE THESE WOMEN HAVE SMALL VAGINAS
Delcat: I dunno, the preggo lady is kinda bulging.
Delcat: Maybe priestlady's vulva is trying to run for help.
Delcat: Oh, and the dicks are censored, I forgot to mention. Doesn't that make this loads less offensive?
Zeiss: It looks like preggo girl's vagina is trying to suck itself inward
Zeiss: OH IS THAT WHAT THOSE ARE
Delcat: I DO NOT KNOW THEY COULD POSSIBLY BE EGGPLANTS
Delcat: OR MS PAINT THROWING UP
Zeiss: INCONVIENTELY LOCATED CABINETS
Delcat: I wonder how many long hours the artist spent on this. I like to think he did it on a plane ride, with a little old lady looking on in horror.
Zeiss: Asking her for references...
Zeiss: SO HOW WOULD YOU FEEL IF YOU WOKE UP AND THERE WAS A DICKGIRL ORGY
Zeiss: HOW MANY EXCLAMATION POINTS DO YOU THINK YOU'D EMENATE
Zeiss: AS A WOMAN
Delcat: I THINK I WOULD GO THE INTERROBANG ROUTE
Delcat: FOR CLASSINESS
Zeiss: AH THANK YOU
Zeiss: I SHALL PUT THIS INFORMATION TO GOOD USE
Delcat: Well, I think this page has soaked in...er, I mean, we've soaked up enough of this page. Let's move on.

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Delcat: The vulva looks on in shock and awe
Delcat: And a puddle of various bodily fluids
Zeiss: Put two little beads where her pubic hair would be, and you'd have a little Cthulhu.
Delcat: D'aaaaw.
Delcat: That dick in the first panel is nearly the size of her head. Things the size of heads is apparently a theme here.
Zeiss: Remember that Simpsons episode where Bart and Homer eject themselves into space? That's what top left panel reminds me of.
Delcat: Yeah, there was a lot of breastmilk in that episode, I remember.
Delcat: "What's going on...? Those mosaics are so confusing!"
Zeiss: Don't lick that toadstool! It might be dangerous!
Zeiss: This is worse foreshortening than PARTYTIME.
Delcat: Terrible foreshortening is ALSO a theme here.

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Delcat: LESLITAAAAAAAA
Zeiss: THEY'RE PISSING OUT CUMS BY THE SECOND
Zeiss: Leslita is the new Quamp, it's official
Delcat: Funny, it really does look like pancake batter.
Delcat: Think they can do it in animal shapes?
Delcat: Mickey Mouse cumcakes! For the kids!
Zeiss: Why doesn't she have hips?
Delcat: Told you, beachballs on spine. It's ~*MAGIC*~
Delcat: Violence is so adorable!
Zeiss: awwwwwww

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Zeiss: So Del, is this really what succubi do?
Delcat: Actually, I contacted one of the succubi OCs from my old RP campaign on the subject.
Delcat: [You must be registered and logged in to see this link.]
Zeiss: So I'll take that as a 'no', then
Zeiss: In the first panel alone, there's a giant disembodied ass lunging out at me, and someone performing annilingus on a cardboard standee.
Delcat: General consensus was that they don't take their work home with them.
Delcat: If I had to perform annilingus, I'd prefer to do it on a cardboard standee. I can see that logic.
Delcat: Is their very aura dripping with jizz? You'd think it'd smell.
Zeiss: Either that or she's practicing her mime act at a very innoppurtune juncture.
Delcat: Think that milk is banana flavored?
Zeiss: It better not be pancake flavored.

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Delcat: Look at this, I'm molting! {/Gilbert Gottfried}
Zeiss: And this, kids, is why you shouldn't fuck on the sun.
Zeiss: You know, guys can't come and urinate at the same time. Is it different for girls?
Delcat: Are her eyes melting out of her sockets? Bad trip, man.
Zeiss: LIME AND LIMPID GREEN A DICKGIRL SCENE A FUCK BETWEEN THE COCK YOU ONCE KNEW
Delcat: Yes, actually, since they're two different sets of plumbing. There's actually a constant argument over whether female ejaculate is composed of piss or...pancake batter.
Zeiss: But can you piss out cums?
Delcat: Couldn't they just, y'know...restore the succubi's energy with magic?
Zeiss: That is the question.
Delcat: I have never tried, sir.
Delcat: I value my sheets more than that.
Zeiss: 'Cause, uh, only the piss is magic?
Zeiss: oh god that girl's legs in the last panel
Delcat: Piss is piss even if it sparkles.
Delcat: oh God I didn't notice it's like the trident optical illusion
Delcat: but with jizz
Zeiss: And that girl in the middle panel has labia the size of her hands.
Delcat: You mean you don't?
Zeiss: Unfortunately not.
Delcat: What kind of dickgirl are you, then?
Zeiss: A labia-impaired one, I guess.

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Delcat: I think I'd be making more of a D: face if I started lactating yogurt.
Zeiss: I think I'd be making more of a D: face if my labia started inflating.
Delcat: I think I'd be making more of a D: face if the action lines from Vibrator Company started attacking me. We saw what happened LAST time.
Zeiss: ...If you look closely, her vagina itself isn't secreting anything. It's all coming from the crevice underneath her labia.
Delcat: Are you saying her taint is bleeding milk?
Delcat: Are we having an Akira moment?
Delcat: ...again?
Zeiss: That always seems to happen.
Zeiss: Well, the drugs *are* kicking in.

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Delcat: Uh, yeah. Two actions that are DEFINITELY not related. It's like punching someone in the nose and their ears wiggling.
Zeiss: SHE REACHES IN, AND GRABS RIGHT ON TO YOUR CLIT
Delcat: I mean not that I think anyone seriously thought otherwise except SOMEONE SERIOUSLY THOUGHT OTHERWISE
Zeiss: SHE SEEMS TO HAVE THE INVISIBLE SHITS, YEAH
Zeiss: ...Her torso is directly attatched to her legs. Like an Iguanodon.
Delcat: And her vulva is crawling up her body, possibly to seek shelter between her tits.
Zeiss: Is she pregnant with her own vagina?
Zeiss: What is going on?
Delcat: Man, Freud would start pissing if he heard that one.
Delcat: I don't know, man, let's try to roll with it.

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Delcat: "Oh boy, I get to birth five invisible sea cucumbers a day from now on. No, that doesn't worry me at ALL."
Zeiss: So they just gave her a cocktail of laxatives?
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Delcat: It's like they wanted scat without the filth and smell of it, which is...kind of the point of scat, I'd been led to believe.
Zeiss: I thought her foot was a piece of shit there for a second.
Delcat: There is not a laxative known to man nor beast that makes shit invisible and scentless. If there was, Sues would be snarfling it down like candy.
Zeiss: TONIGHT, A TRAGIC DISASTER AT THE SLINKY PLANT...
Delcat: Are...are her nipples talking?
Zeiss: It's Mark Trail all of a sudden.
Delcat: How did she keep her glasses on this long, anyway? Were they just glued on with cum or something?
Zeiss: Her nipples, vag and anus just have the best LOLWUT expression.
Delcat: Oh God they do. I could cut that out and make it into a new meme, if I was a HORRIBLE PERSON.

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Zeiss: And now the naughty bits are going o_0
Delcat: "You forgot humans have to breathe again, didn't you?"
"Gomen nasaaaaaai (T-T)"
"Fine, go throw the body on the heap."
Zeiss: She's making the beast with three conjoined backs!
Delcat: This room has got to be like a giant Slip'n'Slide at this point. I hope they have "WET FLOOR" signs, or they're gonna get sued.
Zeiss: This is gonna make for the worst Pauly Shore movie ever.
Delcat: Now, now, Zeiss, don't go saying anything you'll regret later.
Zeiss: TOTAL SHITTAGE FOR THE TIT-ZONE

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Zeiss: First panel: NEED MORE CHEESY POOFS
Delcat: So basically every body part on these girls is like a "Ring bell for crap" appendage, is the basic gist here
Zeiss: Press once for shit, twice for piss.
Delcat: It really is a lot easier if you think of them as sea cucumbers.
Delcat: And think of them being as upset by this as we are.
Delcat: Is she shitting on a random patch of grass?
Delcat: Or did someone steamroll Crono flat?
Zeiss: I think I would rather see two sea cucumbers mating than whatever these things are.
Delcat: It's...actually pretty cool, I've seen nature documentaries.
Delcat: Is that a date, Zeissy?
Zeiss: Sing along (sing along) with the birds! It's a wonderful page but it's all about turds!
Zeiss: I guess

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Delcat: Y HALO THAR
Zeiss: The cock is a sexual organ attatched to male humans and succubi. It looks like this:
Zeiss: {/vonnegut]}
Zeiss: ...Unless I'm wrong, her dick has a rabbit attachment
Delcat: I was always under the impression that incubi had the cock market covered.
Zeiss: Which would actually be pretty handy, now that I think about it.
Delcat: ...I had totally failed to notice that. It really does.
Delcat: But it's up way too high to do its job.
Zeiss: Apparently, her cock stole the muscle of that girl's fingers.
Delcat: It has to to survive. At this point it's basically a giant terminal tumor.
Delcat: Oh, you know what? I think that's actually the cock of the girl behind her. That was a good idea, though. ...well, in this manga's context.
Zeiss: We can dream, Del, we can dream.

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Zeiss: Her naughty bits are Noseybonk
Zeiss: [You must be registered and logged in to see this link.]
Delcat: I would kind of like eager beaver!succubus if not...well, if not for everything else in the manga.
Delcat: NOOOOOOOOOO
Zeiss: PLANTING A CLUE TO THE NEW WORD
Delcat: So, Zeiss, there are six of them. Can you name all the orifices that they're gonna use?
Zeiss: let's see - Vag, ass, mouth...
Zeiss: urethra and ears?
Delcat: Close!
Delcat: I think that one directly behind her is just going to gnaw all her skin off or something
Delcat: That girl is not well

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Delcat: OH GOD ZEISS THEY'RE DOIN' THAT THING WITH THE TITS AGAIN
Zeiss: OWWWWWWWWWWW
Delcat: At least that's the most painful thing on the pageOH GOD ARE THE COCKS PUSHING OUT HER STOMACH WALLS
Zeiss: And there's another weird bulge right to the left.
Delcat: I think that's a second cock.
Delcat: ...maybe.
Zeiss: So somebody is fucking her liver?
Delcat: No, the liver's a solid organ. Probably a lung.
Delcat: I think this page really highlights just how fucking random the censoring is.
Zeiss: JAPANNNNN
Delcat: 8====D \(^o^)/

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Delcat: Yes, Susie, her hand is entering your pussy, we saw. It's not all ABOUT you.
Zeiss: It looks more like she's just picking at it than anything.
Delcat: That bra is like the anti-bra
Delcat: And I'm not sure how it's being held up
Zeiss: I'm not sure what the hell is up with her arms.
Zeiss: This is Liefield-tier anatomy here, folks.
Delcat: *tries to manage the same position*
Delcat: *fails*
Delcat: *even without the head doubling*
Delcat: Is that supposed to be the girl from Spice and Wolf in the middle there?
Zeiss: It looks like she has nachos in her hair.
Delcat: Like I said, the girl from Spice and Wolf.

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Delcat: Oh fuck me Nippon Heroine 3 flashbacks
Zeiss: HAIRY ARMPIT'S CRYIN'
Zeiss: FALLEN ANGEL DYING
Zeiss: RISK A LIFE TO DRINK YOUR MILK
Delcat: IT MAKES ME CRYYYYY WHEN DICKGIRLS DESERVE TO DIE
Delcat: God, she's gonna be a plucked goose at this rate. That amount of shedding can't be healthy.
Zeiss: hold on
Zeiss: MAKE ME AN ANGEL THAT FLIES FROM A DICKGIRL
Zeiss: MAKE ME A SWIMSUIT WITH NO PURPOSE AT ALL
Zeiss: JUST GIVE ME ONE THING THAT I CAN HOLD ON TO
Zeiss: TO BELIEVE IN THIS ARTWORK IS JUST A HARD WAY TO GO
Delcat: *golf clap* You forgot one thing, Zeiss.
Zeiss: And what is that?
Delcat: How wonderfully LEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWD it all is
Zeiss: WHEN CORRECTLY VIEWED, *EVERYTHING* IS LEWD
Delcat: More importantly, I'm thirsty. Let me drink your milk, please.
Zeiss: One bourbon, one Scotch, one tiiiiiiiiiit

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Delcat: Well, I'm going to be sticking to orange juice for a while.
Zeiss: There was a girl
Zeiss: A really ethereal girl who was pregnant, you see
Zeiss: Got drowned by 800 gallons of milk in a succubi orgy
Zeiss: THIS ANGEL'S GONE TO (boob )HEAVEN
Zeiss: THIS ANGEL'S GONE TO (boob) HEAVEN
Delcat: Very nice.
Zeiss: THIS ANGEL'S GONE TO (boob) HEAVEN
Zeiss: and yeah
Delcat: Is that girl in the second panel actually the guy from Anal Justice 2?
Zeiss: fffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffff
Delcat: IT IS AN UNCANNY RESEMBLANCE, IS IT NOT??
Zeiss: last panel: AGAIN with the LEGS
Delcat: I've got no tits to hold me down, to make me come, to make me crown
Delcat: I've got no tits but I still pee, I've got no tits on me
Zeiss: Oh heaven, heaven is a place
Zeiss: A place where lactation seems to always happen...
Delcat: HEY ZEISS, YOU KNOW WHAT
Zeiss: WHAT WHAT
Delcat: I THINK WE'VE MILKED THIS PAGE FOR ALL IT'S WORTH
Zeiss: BADUMTISCH

(continued)

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Delcat: NOOOOOOOGLURGLeurgleurgle
Zeiss: NEED MORE LIQUID CHEESY POOFS
Delcat: Some poor, sad bastard has this as his background, I'm sure. On his laptop. Airport security HATES him.
Zeiss: HOW CAN YOU SAY YOU LOVE HER IF YOU CAN'T EVEN EAT HER POOP
Delcat: All of the girls are holding their pussies open except the catgirl. I thought only BOY cats sprayed urine on things.
Delcat: I have absolutely no idea who is talking and whose ass that is.
Zeiss: I think she's shrinking.
Zeiss: Is like the hentai "Powers Of Ten"?
Delcat: Haven't heard of it. Not sure I want to, now.

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Zeiss: So Del, your thoughts?
Delcat: Sorry, did you say something? I can't hear anything over my darned vagina screaming.
Zeiss: What's it like to be raped from 6 cocks, What's it like to be raped from 6 cocks, What's it like to be raped from 6 cocks, early in the morning?
Delcat: Whay hay and up it rises, whay hay and up it rises, whay hay and up it rises ear-lie in the morning
Delcat: There's an item in Yume Nikki that makes the protagonist's body soft and squishy, called the Buyo Buyo effect for the sound it makes.
Delcat: Zeiss, she is making that sound in my head. Make it stop.
Delcat: Buyo buyo~ Buyo buyo~
Zeiss: That uterus looks might pissed.
Delcat: I would be too, if I was frisbee-shaped for absolutely no reason.
Delcat: ...wait a second. Is someone under her, or does she have three tits?
Delcat: IT BE THE WITCH'S TEAT! BURN HER!
Zeiss: hold on
Zeiss: It's the Solway Firth tit!
Delcat: ...*surreptitously Wikis*
Delcat: Ah ha ha ha, but of course! A good jibe, sir!
Zeiss: Now give my my free film.

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Delcat: One of my favorite ways to piss my sister off is to hug her, then yell "NO BONES!" and hang on her like I'm boneless.
Delcat: Clearly, this lady just took that trick too far.
Zeiss: There's that tit again.
Delcat: I mean, not seeing accurate organs in these things is a given, but SHE HAS NO RIBCAGE OR PELVIS
Zeiss: And she's apparently an amputee now
Delcat: She's not even on her side, so that diagram shouldn't even work AS IT IS
Delcat: And I recognize the bladder, the uterus, and the bowel, but what are those other two openings?
Delcat: WHY DOES HER BOWEL SUDDENLY CUT OFF
Delcat: WHAT IS WRONG WITH THIS WOMAN'S ANATOMY
Zeiss: I guess those are the...jellymakers.
Delcat: I NOW WANT THAT QUESTION TO REMAIN UNANSWERED IN RETROSPECT, BUT THANK YOU FOR YOUR THOUGHTFUL CONTRIBUTION

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Zeiss: Her whole body will turn into a hole?
Delcat: "No, I want you to stick it back in because it's the only thing holding my guts together now. Call an ambulance."
Delcat: The sad truth behind how portals are made
Zeiss: I guess her uterus has had enough and is just going to collapse into a singularity now.
Delcat: I've had days where I've felt like that.
Delcat: From what I can see of that dick, it looks diseased.
Zeiss: ...It's Bender.
Zeiss: Look real close.
Delcat: D:
Zeiss: "Screw you guys, I'm going to start my own porno manga! With blackjack! And hookers!"
Delcat: Are...are we in Robot Hell?

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Zeiss: DEL
Zeiss: DEL YOU MUST REMAIN STRONG
Delcat: "All right, I'm gonna go in and out real fast!" Good God, woman, you're a succubus and you're only now figuring out that's how sex works?
Delcat: I'm actually pretty okay with this. Nephilim Lamedh left me totally numb.
Zeiss: I think it's just a newbie succubus who wants to show off.
Delcat: "Look! Look, guys, I'm in her pussy up to my knees! Look, now I'm in her pussy up to my THIGHS! Isn't this cool? Look, guys! Look!"
Zeiss: "GUYS"
Zeiss: "GUYS I'M STUCK"
Delcat: "Well, that's what you get for sticking it in orifices that don't exist!"
Zeiss: AND SO CONCLUDES THE WEIRDEST PEER PRESSURE PSA EVER
Delcat: MR. B NATURAL, NOOOOOO!
Zeiss: OH MY GOD DELCAT PLEASE SAY THIS ISN'T HAPPENING

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Delcat: "...with a giant mosaic smear! So hot!"
Delcat: ...gaping...nipple chasms...
Zeiss: YEAH STICK IT IN HER CLITHOLE
Zeiss: ...wait
Delcat: Is she talking, or are even the succubi surprised by this development?
Delcat: "...well. I was just gonna tittyfuck you, but this works, I guess."
Delcat: Her tits look like Octoroks without eyes.
Zeiss: I'M SO HORNY I COULD FUCK A NIPPLE
Delcat: Any second now I expect to hear *PWOOMP* and have to pull out my Deku Shield real fast.
Zeiss: ...Her clit looks like someone giving the thumbs-up
Delcat: I'd prefer the OK sign. "It stinks!"
Zeiss: Indeed it does.
Zeiss: I don't even WANT to know what the gaping nipple chasms would smell like.
Delcat: *squirm* I may have overestimated my numbness D:

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Delcat: "NOOOO, DON'T PUT YOUR PEE-PEE IN MY PEEHOLE!"
Zeiss: I'm getting serious Chocobo Nights flashbacks.
Delcat: At least she doesn't get knocked up with a baby bird.
Zeiss: FUCK ON YOU CRAZY DICKGIRLS
Zeiss: Remember when she was young?
Zeiss: Her anatomy was all wrong.
Zeiss: FUCK ON YOU CRAZY DICKGIRLS
Zeiss: And now her urethra's as wide as a lesser girl's thighs.
Zeiss: FUCK ON YOU CRAZY DICKGIRLS
Zeiss: Well she wore out her fuckholes with great vim and vigor!
Zeiss: With cocks as big as trees!
Zeiss: Come on you dickgirls, you plowers of nipples
Zeiss: Come on you strange succubus girl-entrappers and fuck!
Delcat: *snf* That was beautiful.

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Delcat: Aaaaand she pops like a birthday balloon.
Zeiss: Doo doo, doo doo, doo doo-doo-doo-doo...
Delcat: Seriously, that's gotta be as bad as Pop Rocks and Coke.
Zeiss: I'm not even sure how they can all penetrate her like that unless they're all melting into each other.
Delcat: It's the singularity at work. Or they ARE melting together, like that one fic back on the Green Boards where a slime monster started at both ends of a guy and punched its way through to make "one solid fuckpole".
Delcat: Never gonna forget that line, unfortunately.
Delcat: Is...is her navel squirting jizz? How could that even...no, no, I don't want to know.
Zeiss: Well...it's technically a hole...
Zeiss: Oh wow, her breasts are cookie jars.

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Delcat: H-her breasts look...popped... D:
Zeiss: Or like turnips.
Delcat: SO FREAKING LEWD, ZEISS
Zeiss: She's had an entire tree of cherries popped.
Delcat: Didn't this manga have backgrounds once?
Zeiss: yeah about that
Delcat: Oh God she is definitely leaking jizz from her navel SOMEBODY CALL 911
Zeiss: I think they shoved all the backgrounds into her.
Delcat: Is that like the NC-17 version of chewing the scenery?
Zeiss: Even the succubus carrying her looks discontent.

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Delcat: FRECKLE GIRL SCARING ME EVEN MORE NOW
Zeiss: How does that bra work
Zeiss: seriously
Zeiss: I didn't know Escher made lingerie.
Delcat: I think the point is that it doesn't, in any sense of the word
Delcat: Her nipples look fucking peeled.
Zeiss: The girl on the left was damned to spend an eternity doing squats.
Delcat: At least they let her keep 99% of her outfit.

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Delcat: SUDDENLY, TENTACLES
Zeiss: GOTTA FIT 'EM IN SOMEWHERE
Delcat: AND TWO DICKS
Delcat: TWO OF 'EM
Zeiss: COUNT 'EM, TWO
Delcat: How many dicks must a girl chug down before they call her a man?
Zeiss: How many holes must a dickgirl fuck before they can close once again~
Zeiss: The answer, my friends, is pixeled on the dongs
Zeiss: The answer is pixeled on the dongs.
Delcat: You'd think if they were such dab hands at body modification, they could fix their fucking hips.
Zeiss: YO GIRL I HERD YOU LIKE DICKS
Delcat: SO WE PUT A DICK ON YOUR DICK SO YOU COULD HGLARGHALARGH

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Delcat: You notice I had some overly specific wording when I was talking about people being knocked up
Zeiss: is this good
Delcat: No, Dot. This is bad. This is very bad.
Zeiss: WELCOME BACK MY DICKS TO THE SHOW THAT ALWAYS SQUICKS
Zeiss: WE WILL PROMISE YOU'LL SHIT BRICKS, WHAT A FIX, WHAT A FIX
Delcat: ROCK BAND: DICKGIRL EDITION
Zeiss: If a kid ever asks me why some passing girl is pregnant, I am so going to tell him that someone put a fairy in her womb.
Delcat: You're right, Zeiss. If we have to be fucked up by this, so does the younger generation.
Delcat: Curse their untarnished little eyes!

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Delcat: Tell me, Zeiss, do you wear your cock on your sleeve?
Delcat: Is that the way you swing?
Zeiss: Cocksleeves is what they were, and cocksleeves were their delight~
Zeiss: Haste, haste, the succubi who by our ladies BLARGHHH
Delcat: Is that succubi in the middle spanking that girl with her tits?
Delcat: And aren't they full by now? Isn't this the human equivalent of eating the entire buffet in one go?
Zeiss: I can barely even tell anymore, really.
Delcat: Let's keep going, my eyes are starting to melt.

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Delcat: SO. FUCKING. LEWD.
Zeiss: Never felt anything like that before...poor girl's bodies tumble 'cross the floor...
Delcat: I don't know if they should be stirring her peehole AND her womb. Too many cocks spoil the broth, you know.
Zeiss: This is begging for an eggbeater joke, isn't it
Delcat: I think the eggbeater speaks for itself at this point
Delcat: Are those tentacles even attached to anything?
Zeiss: They're just floating by in the void, like everything else.

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Delcat: You'd think they would have suffocated by now.
Delcat: SHE'S COMING OUT BREACH! CALL THE MIDWIFE!
Zeiss: Then unbirthed the fairie queene, an angry queene was she
Zeiss: Woe betide her ill-far'd face, "An ill death may she die!"
Zeiss: "If I'd known, dickgirls", she said, "What this night I did see,
Zeiss: I'd have looked you in the cock and turned it to a tree~"
Delcat: So if the Tooth Fairy leaves money in exchange for teeth, then the Shit Fairy...that's absolutely disgusting, but a pretty good deal.
Zeiss: Look, somebody's maidenhead is pretty well gone by now, that's all I know.
Delcat: "Hey, what crawled up your ass and died?"
"She DIED? Oh gawd, I am not goin' up the river for this!"

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Zeiss: Dr. Freud, your thoughts?
Delcat: Sigmund Freud: *PISSES OUT OF NIPPLES*

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Delcat: HEY ZEISS
Delcat: GUESS WHAT GIVING BIRTH IS??
Zeiss: *sigh* What is it, Delly.
Delcat: LEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD
Zeiss: Those looks like rocks in her ass. IT'S AN ADVENTURE CAVE
Delcat: NO, ZEISS, DON'T GO IN THE ADVENTURE CAVE
Delcat: I will admit that I've never seen a woman give birth, but I am pretty sure they do not work up a fucking head of vag-steam doing it.
Zeiss: AWW HOW COME THEY CAN SEE THE INSIDES OF HER WOMB BUT WE CAN'T
Delcat: WE DON'T WANT YOU GETTING ALL OVERSTIMULATED, ZEISS, WE MUST ONLY SHOW YOU WHAT IS DECENT AND MODEST
Delcat: "I'm going to do something even more amazing, watch!"
"Everyone can do that finger-wiggle trick, Fairy."

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Delcat: Dang, shoulda taped that gerbil.
Zeiss: IT'S HER PARTY AND SHE'LL RUPTURE IF SHE WANTS TO
Delcat: Fun fact: Disney Adventures magazine once listed "Taping the hamster" in their slang section as "doing something cool". God knows how the fact checkers missed THAT one.
Delcat: I like that they continue to narrate really obvious things for us. Because I'm STUPID.
Zeiss: You know, I'm getting the feeling that the author doesn't like fairies that much.
Delcat: Maybe they're the little biting faeries from Labyrinth.
Delcat: In which case they probably have a nasty vagina dentata surprise.
Zeiss: Del, we already did that song in the Nippon Heroine thread if you're trying to lead me on.
Delcat: I wasn't even thinking of that, oh man
Delcat: So is that "V for victory" or "V for vagina, split"?

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Zeiss: It took me about thirty seconds for that jumbled mess of flesh on the right to take on coherence.
Delcat: You know, my succubi and incubi characters definitely had lives outside of sex. Hobbies. Interests. That sort of thing.
Delcat: There is a point in every orgy when even the most seasoned dickgirl starts yawning and checking her watch, y'know?
Delcat: Maybe they go on shifts.
Delcat: ...is Scary Freckle Girl actually saying "derp" in the last panel?
Zeiss: I wish
Zeiss: Witch-girl looks like she's finally going "EWWWWWWWWWWWW" though
Delcat: She just looks stoned to me. Actually, she's looked stoned through the entire doujinshi, come to think of it.
Zeiss: EVERYBODY MUST GET NIPPLE-FUCKED
Delcat: NO I DON'T WANNA
Delcat: I GOT AN EXCUSE FROM MY DOCTOR
Delcat: HE SAYS HAVING MY BREASTS RIPPED IN HALF IS BAD FOR MY ASHTMA

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Delcat: oh man not sexy tentacle action not sexy tentacle action
Zeiss: Hey, that girl's got a pretty nice six-pack OH GOD NOOOOOO
Delcat: She looks kinda like Misty in that panel, which is eight kinds of horrible
Zeiss: Hey, those girls are like one long living fuckpole.
Delcat: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Zeiss: I COULDN'T RESIST
Delcat: CURSE YOU ZEIIIISS

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Delcat: "Hello, name's Escher. Have you seen my stairs?"
Zeiss: DO THAT TO ME ONE MORE TIME, ONCE IS NEVER ENOUGH WITH A DICKGIRL LIKE YOU
Delcat: Zeiss, I thought we had some class left somewhere
Zeiss: So that explains the background! They're on the cover of Stratosfear!
Delcat: I love the look on the succubus in the back. "Eh heh heh...what?"
Delcat: And the kid from AJ2 is just loving all of this so much
Delcat: Ready for the last page?
Zeiss: ...
Zeiss: Bring it on.
Delcat: Trick question! Nobody could possibly be ready for the last page.

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Zeiss: [You must be registered and logged in to see this link.]
Delcat: You ever wonder what made the Nazis' faces melt off in Raiders of the Lost Ark? Yeaaaaah.
Zeiss: Okay, now I'm getting Watchmen flashbacks.
Zeiss: CONGRATULATION. THE STORY IS HAPPY END.
Delcat: Are those tentacles going in the girls' asses, out their mouths, in priestlady's mouth, and out her pussy? 'Cause dang, those are some devoted-ass tentacles.
Zeiss: They're non-union, they'll do anything.
Delcat: ~HAPPYDNE~
Delcat: Well, Zeiss, there's only one thing that can make this better.
Zeiss: And what is that?
Delcat: [You must be registered and logged in to see this link.] Sea cucumbers mating!
Zeiss: YAY
Delcat: THEIR LOVE IS SO PURE
Zeiss: AND CUCUMBERY

UPDATE: I'm not sure if people didn't care because Imageshack turned the links into swiss cheese, or if people just didn't care, but the problem has been brought to my attention either way. Rather than try to find and fix all the broken links and risk having them go down again, please download and follow along here. Or, y'know, don't, if you don't care.

Delcat wrote:

UPDATE: I'm not sure if people didn't care because Imageshack turned the links into swiss cheese, or if people just didn't care, but the problem has been brought to my attention either way. Rather than try to find and fix all the broken links and risk having them go down again, please download and follow along here. Or, y'know, don't, if you don't care.

I don't know about anyone else, but I didn't click the links because my room doesn't have a door. But I read your snark and it was awesome as always.