House of Holes

Nicholson Baker has been writing for quite some time. I remember reading some of his books back in the '90s, so when I noticed that he'd published another one, I figured I'd give it a try.

I got about thirty pages in before giving up in apathetic disgust.

The flap jacket describes the novel as an over-the-top exercise in sex-positive hilarity [paraphrased]. What I read was the most unerotic, only faintly amusing for sheer absurdity, wordspew worthy of the urplest of trolls. Consider this titillating exchange between a young woman and a disembodied, animated arm:

Quote :

"Oh my god, two fingers. Haw. Haw." Shandee glanced at her. Rianne's knees had fallen apart and her eyes were slitted closed. "He seems to want to make me come, oh god, oh shit." Then: "Ham, ham, oo, oo, oo, oo, oo, oo, ham, ham, HAW!"

She lay still and held up the arm. He made an O with his fingers, which glittered with her sex juices."

Damn, doesn't that make you hot?

A later scene has deceased Russian composers playing symphonies on a woman's legs while she sits in a "pussy cradle" and covering her feet in Russian come. The word "cockitude" puts in an appearance.

Every horrible euphemism in the thread elsewhere on this board and dozens other besides put in an appearance.

...I just wish I had the time and energy for a full snark. As it is, if anybody has access to it, you might want to share your thoughts with the rest of us.

myeerah wrote:

Quote :

Then: "Ham, ham, oo, oo, oo, oo, oo, oo, ham, ham, HAW!"

Damn, doesn't that make you hot?

Dunno about hot, but it's sure made me hungry.

WD40 wrote:

myeerah wrote:

Quote :

Then: "Ham, ham, oo, oo, oo, oo, oo, oo, ham, ham, HAW!"

Damn, doesn't that make you hot?

Dunno about hot, but it's sure made me hungry.

Hungry for man-sausage and gallons of jizz gravy?