This is not how you reconnect with your child!!!

I wish to point out an inconsistency. In his discussion about 'pegging' Bistromath defends himself when allegations of homosexuality-ism crop up.

But in his okcupid profile (I laughed so hard I couldn't type. I'm good at sex and cuddles too!) he says he's bisexual.

I realise being gay and being bisexual are not the same thing.

But does Bistromath like the cock or not?

Or is it only horse cock?

Bisexual means he loves the cock, but also loves the pussy. So the answer to "does bistromath like the cock or not?" would be yes.


Although personally, I think he's normally into women, but got fucked in the ass by his Dad and thinks that makes him bisexual, because he totally wanted it like all kids.

Hey hey hey hey hey hey hey




... Nothing wrong with pegging (or liking to get pegged).













If you're anyone other than bistromath.

Only in this place your average topic could have this sort of turn of events.

Mafiosa wrote:

...Dude.

Man, those pictures up at the top....

A calf giving a guy a blowjob. That's something I could have lived my whole life without seeing.

Mafiosa wrote:

Holy.

Suddenly everything makes sense.

Yes, yes it does.

*prepares to snark the pronfic on the last link*

Malganis wrote:

Mafiosa wrote:

...Dude.

Man, those pictures up at the top....

A calf giving a guy a blowjob. That's something I could have lived my whole life without seeing.

Mafiosa wrote:

Holy.

Suddenly everything makes sense.

Yes, yes it does.

*prepares to snark the pronfic on the last link*

ilu

And yeah, sorry, that may have needed more warning.

Mafiosa wrote:

Malganis wrote:

Mafiosa wrote:

...Dude.

Man, those pictures up at the top....

A calf giving a guy a blowjob. That's something I could have lived my whole life without seeing.

Mafiosa wrote:

Holy.

Suddenly everything makes sense.

Yes, yes it does.

*prepares to snark the pronfic on the last link*

ilu

And yeah, sorry, that may have needed more warning.

Yeah, probably. When I saw the top, I was like "What the shit... Oh, God"

Mafiosa wrote:

Malganis wrote:

Mafiosa wrote:

...Dude.

Man, those pictures up at the top....

A calf giving a guy a blowjob. That's something I could have lived my whole life without seeing.

Mafiosa wrote:

Holy.

Suddenly everything makes sense.

Yes, yes it does.

*prepares to snark the pronfic on the last link*

ilu

And yeah, sorry, that may have needed more warning.

When I clicked there was just animals doing animals, and then this awfully depressed looking German Shepherd sitting on a couch rather normally.

I wonder if Al and Penguin knew what kind of sick fuck they were associating with.[You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

Yay, Cyberwulf! [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

Cyberwulf wrote:

I wonder if Al and Penguin knew what kind of sick fuck they were associating with.[You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

You hear that? It's the sound of bistromath explaining to them that he was just trolling no really gaiz.

Verandering wrote:

Mafiosa wrote:

Malganis wrote:

Mafiosa wrote:

...Dude.

Man, those pictures up at the top....

A calf giving a guy a blowjob. That's something I could have lived my whole life without seeing.

Mafiosa wrote:

Holy.

Suddenly everything makes sense.

Yes, yes it does.

*prepares to snark the pronfic on the last link*

ilu

And yeah, sorry, that may have needed more warning.

When I clicked there was just animals doing animals, and then this awfully depressed looking German Shepherd sitting on a couch rather normally.

When I clicked there was a couple of human cocks, one of them getting licked by a calf.

Verandering wrote:

Cyberwulf wrote:

I wonder if Al and Penguin knew what kind of sick fuck they were associating with.[You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

You hear that? It's the sound of bistromath explaining to them that he was just trolling no really gaiz.

Doesn't Al know him in real life? Today's going to awkward for them.

I wish I was there.

Cyberwulf wrote:

I wonder if Al and Penguin knew what kind of sick fuck they were associating with.[You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

I'm wondering that, myself. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

I'd hope not since people can be different online than in RL, but...

Well, that was...different. [Goes to wash brain.]

007bistromath's LJ wrote:

I am a very strange man

No arguments here.

I felt the eyes of the FBI just by clicking the link...

Cyberwulf wrote:

I wonder if Al and Penguin knew what kind of sick fuck they were associating with.[You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

Oh, I've known for years. I'm usually the one outing him. Mostly when conversations get stalled and/or boring.

...while in retrospect it obviously wouldn't have panned out well, I'm surprised I never thought of doing that here.

Lapin wrote:

Alhazred wrote:

So, this just popped into my PM box.

Lapin wrote:

Bet you a quarter your friend's head is all explodey.

Seriously, a private message about forum drama.

[You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

It was just a joke dude.

Oh, I never doubted that, but surely you can understand that when Internet forum drama reaches the lol private message lol stage in here of all places, joke or not, it's a bit of a wallbanger.

I almost clicked on that link but then I remember I have to go through a security clearance and went fuuuuuck that.

-wince- not only did i get the calf BJ, I got a dog licking a woman.... gah.. I REALLY didn't need to see that.

Also -winces again- Why must he be from Seattle? This is one thing that actually makes me happy I don't live there anymore, even though I love the city. O.<;

-goes to listen to OOMPH! for hours to bleach the brain.-

Mafi, did you ever know that you're my hero?

Salamas wrote:

Wait...She tracked her son down, and then had sex with him? What is wrong with her brain?!

Only a higher being or a well-trained psychoanalyst can answer that. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

Lysander wrote:

Mafi, did you ever know that you're my hero?

I try, baby, I try. But today, the real hero is google and natural stupidity.

Oh man, I love satisfying conclusions.

Quote :

Sorry, that was uncalled for. I'm just, y'know... This is stressful. I've been looking for this for years. What seemed to happen all the time back in the day was I'd meet girls who wanted to do this with me, but they didn't have one, or they didn't bring it with them, or they were scared of it or something, or they turned out to have a boyfriend (!), or they were just too busy.

Do I hear the mating call of the Misunderstood Nice Guy? A long, whining BAAAAAAW? Yeah, I thought so.

Dear Bistromath (because we all know you're still watching this): You claim on your OKCupid account to be polyamorous, yet you balk at the idea of your girlfriend having another boyfriend. Exactly what do you think "polyamorous" means? (Hint: It does not denote an all-girl harem fawning over you 24/7.)

Quote :

Ever since I bought the thing, I have not been able to set up so much as a movie date or get a hug, like it's sitting in my drawer radiating anti-mojo or something. I'm getting just a titch tired of trying to get dates/relationships the normal way and introducing the idea to that. So, I figured I'd take the direct approach.

Since doing that, the only responses I've ever received are "how 'bout the real thing?" and "lol why would u want that it's gross/pathetic"

Yeah, I'm slightly bitter.

Yeah, it's totally because you bought a sex toy that you can't get any, not because you're a pathetic, homophobic horsefucker with loony political views that thinks kiddy rape is AWWWWWRIGHT.

God, just looking at his OKCupid profile is like dipping your fingers into week-old pizza grease. HEY GUYS, HE LIKES KIDS AND ANIMALS.

Quote :

I also enjoy writing, though I really do better at editing and contributing to a friend's work than anything on my own, and I've dived about as deep into psychology as a person can go without actually going to school for it.

SO HE'S TOTALLY QUALIFIED TO SPOUT THIS BULLSHIT, AS OPPOSED TO THOSE OF US WHO HAVE ACTUALLY ACED MULTIPLE PSYCHOLOGY CLASSES IN COLLEGE, GUYS, BECAUSE HE IS JUST SO FUCKING DEEP

Quote :

I have a truckload of weird kinks. I frequently meet people who say they're "into anything," and amuse myself by forcing them to redefine "anything."

Nice girl: Hi, what's your--
Bistro: I ENJOY WRITING STORIES ABOUT HORSES FUCKING GIRLS LIKE YOU
Nice girl: --name.

Quote :

Does this make me look gay?

As I adjusted my high heels and made sure my falsies were in order, this is what I asked Tyrone and Lance.

"No, of courthe not. You look FABULOUS."

I felt so much better. I wouldn't want to look gay out in public, and all. Certainly not I. The straightest man on the planet.

TRANSVESTITES ARE ALMOST ALWAYS STRAIGHT. I WILL BEAT YOU ABOUT THE HEAD WITH EDDIE IZZARD.

Mafiosa, you win. You win everything.

The thing is, that profile's out of date; apparently he hasn't lived in Seattle for years, and wants me to be VERY AWARE THAT HE HAS A GIRLFRIEND AND FUCKS HER REGULARLY and stuff, which makes him far more sexually healthy than I.

Mafiosa wrote:

Thanks a fucking lot Penguin and Alhazred.

I'm a generous man; I share my suffering with everyone.

/or however that quote went

Cyberwulf wrote:

I wonder if Al and Penguin knew what kind of sick fuck they were associating with.[You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

Yes.