My Little Mary Sues: Magic is Believing in Anthromorphic Winged Unicorns

TheIan wrote:

Took some doing, but I found the miserable bastard's author page..

oh god this is pathetic

This is, like, every trope of an old-school 14-year-old, privileged, self-important, fanbrat, badfic authour. I havn't seen a profile like this since we were posting in The House!

Quote :

Age: 26

CHRIST!

Quote :

Hello... I am Dakari-King Mykan...(Just call me Mykan) No I'm not a real king, it's just something I think to play around with for fictional roleplaying and helps me come up with ideas.

Ugh.

Quote :

That's right... I'm really the same Mykan who made that horrible mess of Fanfiction.net years ago, but I have come back to mend my ways.

Oh bless. He caused some e-drama and now he thinks he's important.

Quote :

Alot of people out there really do see me as a leader to the Dakari's,

WTF is a Dakari?

Quote :

and when it was thoguht about hard enough, it was kind of true, even I was surprised for that.

[...]

Quote :

Never the less, just because I am called KING doesn't mean I will treat any of the other Dakari's like weaklings

SEE HOW YOUR KING IS MODEST!

Quote :

Alot of my fics will have the Character's OOC... only becuase I'm allowed to do that, after all it is fiction, and why let the other authors tell you how to write fics.

I love these characters so much, I am such a fan of them, that when I write FANfiction I shall remove their personalities and replace them with things I like better. I can do this because it's MY story. And it's Fanfiction. So NYEH!

Quote :

Just do it your way. If you don't like the stroy, don't read it... if you intebd to reveiw it...at lest give the atuhor a compliment for trying.

Wow.

Just wow.

Just...

wow.

"don leik don read", "no bad comments" and a plea for asspats just for trying. This is just so... so pathetic.

If this author was 12, I'd probably ignore it. If they were 14, I'd be leaving a soft-worded critique. If they were 16 I'd be sending a flame.

This guy is 26. I don't know what I should send.

Social services?

Quote :

I think it's timefor Takari's learned about the Dakari's...We have just as much right to be here as you do.

Oh...

I've got a horrible feeling that people he likes are "Dakari" and people he doesn't like are "Takari".

This is reminding me of Stephen King's Misery, where a delusional, psychotic FanBrat devides th world up into three groups: "Poor Poor things" (Children she'd put out of their misery), "Dirty Birds" (Baddies) and Her.

Quote :

Takari's and Dakari's Don't see Eye to eye, which means we shouldn't be intereacting with each other... in other words. TAKARI'S shouldn't read DAKARI Fics... or vice-versa.

Segregation is the only way forward. Compromise is never an option.

Quote :

The Way I see it... Takari's... you go your own way... and me and my people will go mine. I Don't want to see any flame wars. I made that mistake long ago, and I'm not going to let it happen again.

[...]

I wish not to cause any disturbances... the only person who can really overthrow me THE DAKARI KING is the FF.net administration, but no one else.

YOUR KING ANSWERS TO GOD ALONE!

Quote :

Since some of my fics can't be posted here... I have a second account at MediaMiner.org, where all my fics are, including a Rated MA one...but don't take my word for it, go read it yourself.

Totally checking this out BTW. I am fully expecting (and half hoping, to be honest) a self-insert sexfic with him, Renamon, Submissive!Rika and S1 Kari.

Oh, did I mention he's a Digimon fan?

Quote :

Dakari's [are] the greastes, most powerful group of Digidestined in all of 01 and 02.

Quote :

The Rules of Fan Fiction.net say you can't add non-fictional Characters, However... that doesn't mean you can't CREATE a character that has your name, and your voice.

After all... it may look like you, it may act like you, it may eve sound like you, but that character is not really you, and I didn't really see a rule that prohibits that!

Quote :

As for my fics... most of the Characters are OOC, but that's because I'm not really focussing on that part of their character.

"Who gives a shit about their personalities, motivations or morals. They exist as 2-dimensional ego-stroking cardboard cutouts to tell me how awesome I am, nothing more. Leave me alone! I'm a fan! I'm allowed to do this!"

Quote :

For example... If DAVIS MOTOMIYA was real (Which he is not)

Although part of me wants to put a sarcastic "Thanks for telling me that" comment here. I am, actually, relived he's told me this. It tells me that this guy still has a reality/fantasy barrier in place.

Quote :

Kari and TK have broken his spirit several times over before, and in the real world, anyone would have done exactly what I wrote.

...

I'm remembering his views on "friendship" and the rather dubious connection this author has with actual emotions and the nature of human interaction.

I am predicting that he has written a fic in which Davis has killed Kari and TK for hurting his feelings.

Quote :

25 Year saga: Davis runs a military empire conisitng of clones of the DD's kids and their Digimon in an atempt to make people suffer becuase he never got to be with Kari

Quote :

That's why my Character's are OOC, I focuss on their INNER-NATURES as well as their originalities. It makes storiy writing easier and so I don't have to violate my code as a Dakari.

YEAH! I don't bother with their personalities, or their established principles. I focus on their INNER-NATURE! And if you think I'm wrong, it's because you just don't know the characters like I do!

Also, I've figured out what Dakari and Takari is.

Davis/Kari & TK (Takeru)/Kari.

This whole nation he's built up, and crowned himself King of (although he's oh so modest about that) is based over a slashfic divide.

And just as I got to that revelation...

Quote :

A Long long time ago in 2003... I had another account...I was just called MYKAN... And I was a novice writer.

It seemed that no matter how hard I tried, I got nothing but flames, flames and more flames. even if I changed the stories, they still flammed me. They didn't even commend me for trying.

Finally... I couldn't take it anymore... so I flammed them back... and my account got banned.

Shortly after that... I started Flaming the Takari's... get them to shut down anonymous reveiws so the Dakari's would get more reviews... and was partaily succeeding.

Before long... I turned this entire website into a Flame war zone... I got lot's of Takari's down.

Some people even called me... The King of Dakari's... and when you stopped to think about it...it was kind of true.

I led the Dakari's to victory.

I always stayed on my feet.

I made the Dakari's realize that they are stornger than Takari's in power.

But after a long time... some people made me realize that fighting wasn;t really all that good... and boy were they right, after I signed myself on Mediaminner.org (Homepage) I decided to give F.F another try.

Now I'm back... and I tend to make up for all my misdeeds.

No more battles.

No more flaming

And... No one will ever look down on me again... I am the Supreme Kai of all Dakari's... and it is true. I am the Leader of the most powerful Digidestined (Dakari) in all of Season 01 and 02

There may be other Dakari Kings...but they are onlyLeaders of different types of Dakari... but my title...is the King of them all... THe KING OF KINGS.

Still... I don't see myself all powerful and wonderful... I treat all the Dakari's as equals... Nobody Dakariis better or worse, we are all Dakari's... and all we want is for Davis and Kari to be together.

Forgive me this little indulgence:

Quote :

I alos want to help Dakari's who are having trouble with Wroter's block,

I did a real lol when I read this.

Quote :

It's not easy for me to be Dakari King... I have to workalot harder than most authors. Day and night... every hour on the hour (Almost)... and there's nothing I can do about it.

Because I'm the Supreme King of Dakari's... I'm in a class by myself... no one can help me because even if theywanted to...My concentrarion as well as my working is too much for them to handle.

SO SPESHUL!!1!

Quote :

Besides... I only have friends over the Internet...but no friends whom I call my own... Nobody gives me chance anymore, and they never did before... Even those who never knew me at all or the things I've done don;t give me a chance... that's another reason why I'm so down all the time. (I feel just like Davis would without Kari)

SO RONREY!!1!

Quote :

(SONG)

-The Happiness of being me

is not what it's cracked up to be

It's lonley being One... of a Kind!

...what?

Quote :

-With all the known varitey

The Fame that Fiction gave to me

It's lonely being One...Of a Kind

And I write fanfiction not only to help Characters like Davis...but also ME!

-I'd like to be like everyone I see.

Not Specail, Just an ordianry guy.

WHAT?

Quote :

A Guy who is loved by many of those in life

At least, I'd like to have the chance to try.

-The Happiness of being me

is not what it's cracked up to be

It's lonley being One... of a Kind!

It's lonley...being

One... of a Kind!

(Tear)

Sniffles...Please excuse me

oh god...

Quote :

But I want you all to know... I'm not called Dakari King becuase I think I am. (I don't think I'm better than the the rest)

Oh no! What could have given us the idea that you think you're better than anyone else?

Quote :

Quote :

It's not easy for me to be Dakari King... I have to workalot harder than most authors. Day and night... every hour on the hour (Almost)... and there's nothing I can do about it.

Because I'm the Supreme King of Dakari's... I'm in a class by myself... no one can help me because even if theywanted to...My concentrarion as well as my working is too much for them to handle.

Quote :

And... No one will ever look down on me again... I am the Supreme Kai of all Dakari's... and it is true. I am the Leader of the most powerful Digidestined (Dakari) in all of Season 01 and 02

There may be other Dakari Kings...but they are onlyLeaders of different types of Dakari... but my title...is the King of them all... THe KING OF KINGS.

Quote :

You know... sometimes when I write a fic about romance and love and all that stuff... I wonder... How is it that I have no romance in my life but I'm able to make such romantic fics sometimes.

Considering what you think "Friendship" is, I honestly doubt your credentials when it comes to "romance".

I'm not planning to stay ignorant, mind. I've been wanting to snark something, and I'm still hoping that on your own site there's a Self-Insert/Renamon/Davis/Kari/Rika/Veemon/Noodlecart orgyfic.

Quote :

-You wake up one moring,
and you find that something's new.
The rains have all ben chased away,
and the sky is bright and blue.

ohjesus, AGAIN?

Quote :

-When you log on to fiction.
You'll find something I know
That the love some couples share
Is continuing to grow.

-You know who has been there,
and I think it's really nice.
To feel the feeling of fiction
With warmth instead of ice.

-He'll tickle on you nose.
You can feel it in your toes.
A Shiver or a tear...
Let's you know Mykan is here.

Ugh...

Y'now what? With the lack of any tune or music to this piece. I'm going to sing the chorus to King Mykan's Theme along to the Chorus of Fireman Sam.

Quote :

-If you try to turn around
(Fireman Sam) (Mykan)
When you hear him coming round.
(Fireman Sam) (Mykan)
He's sure to dissapear
But you know Mykan is here.

Oh good. He has a section in his profile where he lays down the laws for writing Fanfiction.

Quote :

I'd say it's time you all learned How Digimon coupling fandoms really work in the (fictional world)

This written right after a journal post stating:

Quote :

You know what really burns me up? The people ont this site who just don't get it!

When I write a story... I WRITE IT... not you/them. You can;t make me change them or delete them, and what bursn me up more, is they try to convince me to be more like them... to me... THEY'RE CRAZY!

If I want to make my stoires that way... then THAT WAY they shall be. I don't want write my fics like I have to pass some sort of inspection or something, I just want to write them out the way I see things... Likeevery decent authour here knows that.

Back to the laws:

Quote :

I'd say it's time you all learned How Digimon coupling fandoms really work in the (fictional world) See in the REAL world, there is nothing better than anything in Digimon couples, everyone is just trying to do their best.

0.o

What does that even mean?

Quote :

But in the fictional world, there is a difference. It doesn't matter how many people support the couple. (Like if there are more Takari's than Dakari's) that doesn't mean SQUAT!

What really matters is the CRESTS of the Digi destined in te couple you support. Each Crest has it's own different power that it gives to all the supporters in the fictional world.

NOTE: You can only use the powers of the digi destined you support, if they never controled that power, then you can't use it either, (And Digimon movies don't count ONLY THE SHOW itself)

What does this even mean?


He goes on to list al the Crests (magical McGuffins picked up by the characters throughout the first run on Digimon) and lists their "powers".

It's all very Captain Planet up until this:

Quote :

HOPE:

Owned ONLY by TK (I really hate him!)

Hope does not really grant you anything too special, except it does allow you to keep believe in all the positve things.

TK is stinky and smelly and his crest is poo.

Quote :

LIGHT:

Owned ONLY by KARI!

This gives you the power to either shine light on the darkness, or extract it and make the darkness stronger.

(HOPE and LIGHT are NOT powers used for battling in combat)

Forgive the Digimon fansperging here BUT:

The crest of Hope was basically the Digimon equivalent of a Hyper Beam.

The crest of Light is LITERALLY the Mary-Sue Speshul Powah of Digimon.

Both have ONLY manifested during combat.

But let's not get too hung up on the Dakiri King's need to make Stinky TK useless, or make Mary-Sue Kari a delicate little flower that needs to be protected from danger.

Quote :

Again... if the Digi destined you support does not have that power, they can't use, which means you can't either. Also, once you select a copule to support, you MAY NOT support a couple that rivals that of your own. Like Taiora's and Mattora's... or... Takari's and Dakari's.

Couples like that are at a rivaling war to get the girl. The winners gets the girl, but the losers are locked away forever as punishment for their failure.

There are no compromisies in these type of rivalrys. You can only do ONE of TWO things to your rivals.

SHOOT THEM DOWN

or, BE SHOT DOWN!

There is no other way.

You can however support couples where the Digi destined in it are close to the ones in your own. Like Dakari and Kenako. Yolei and Ken are really close friends to Davis and Kari so it works out. They may help you, and you may help them.

And finally...

True Davis and Kari lovers are the most powerful Digidestined int he Univers because of their MIRACLES, but there are other Davis and/or Kari couples out there. Which one is stronger?

The most popular ones from the show are supperior to the others, Davis and Kari were the ones on the show, so they can't be beaten becuase Davis never gave anyone else a try.

And... There you have it... now you see how Digi-couples really work, and how Dakari's are really the most powerful Digidestined in the Universe! IT's almost unthinkable that any other couple can beat them with their miracles.

Well, thanks for clearing that up.

...

An adult wrote this.

An adult, presumably, writing for other adults.

Quote :

I have this very rare, very weird and very horrofying condition.

Whenever I see a couple on anything at all either anime, or cartoons, or regualr shows. If there's someone with a broken heart who worked so hard in the end... I suffer from very stressful things.

-Hypervetilation. -Rushing blood. -Numness in the muscles... etc, etc.

Like Davis not being with Kari... or Couples that result in the same category.

If I see ANY COUPLE either Anime, cartoon, or TV show, ANYTHING at all that resembles what happens to a man not getting the girl after struggling so hard, and ends up broken hearted, alone (Finding another is not the same) , and miserable... for some reason I just get so stressed out that it hurts, both physically and emotionally.

My Fan fics alone can keep the stress at bay for a short time, but it will not last long at all, so I must make another, then another, and another... On, and on, and on, and stopping for a break is out of the question for me.

This guy is, basically, the Forever Alone meme given flesh.

Quote :

FEB 28th, 2008...

Bad news everyone...

You're not going to believe what I found, but there's a website in which some authours are goign about and making MOKERIES of Fanfics they don't think is good.

They might even have YOUR fiction on there, but don;t worry about them. they can do nothing to us.

[You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

Quote :

So if you ever see these rats, don;t let them get to you. They just can't tell their brains' from their brianless ideas.

Yeah! Fuck those haters! They just can't tell their brains' from their... brianless... ideas...?

Wait. What?

Quote :

December 27th, 2011...

To those who are still curious about my "My Little Unicorn Magic is Believing" fic, here is the explinations you seek...

Oh, this'll be good.

Quote :

First of all, I don't write fanfics for fun and games (That's the least bit) I write them because I'm angry and frustrated, and in pain.

...

He gives us a clip to his youtube account.

He has a Youtube Account BTW

And..

Well...

This:



A 5-min tribute video, complete with self-insert Anumu animation, over how horriable it was to him when Beast Boy and Terra split up.

Check from 3:52 onwards.

...

Open his profile and Ctrl-F for "December 27th, 2011"

He has a couple of essays about why he chose MLP:FiM for his venting fic.

It is very sad.

And very pathetic.

And this guy wrote it when he was in his mid 20's.


I can't.

I just can't.


This guy.

He's right, you know.




There's no one on here named Brian.

Dakari is a name of a pairing in Digimon- between Daisuke and Hikari. In the dub it's Davis and Kari, so he thought it was more appropriate to call it Dakari.

And holy shit,t hanks for the spork on his page. I knew how big his ego was, but holy shit that was... that was something else.

Maybe one day, I'll do his revenge fic after how hard he raged after Things Change in Teen Titans. Maybe.

If you go on his youtube, he made "A Fictional story of the Dakaris and Takaris" Iiiiiii am probably not gonna watch that, at least not for a while. Still though, if anyone wants that, it's probably pretty lulzworthy. Maybe if I ever get around to MLU Star Fleet...

...

Oh yeah I forgot to mention that THIS STORY HAS SEQUELS?

But with that, lets spork Chapter 5, Strong as a Rock, a metaphorical allegory to read this without bashing your own head in, something I have sadly failed and have required head surgery for. Damn you horrible sotry !

Quote :

The Rainbow Rod was indeed a mystical weapon, and was powered to respond to Lightning's command, and only his command. All he had to do was call for it in battle and it would come.

NO, REALLY? It's a magic weapon that will come to his call!? I mean, wow! I never would have learned that if I hadn't just seen him use it in a few more fights!

You know, you can show us and we'll remember. We're not idiots.

So, the Grand Bling has increased security measures everywhere because you know EEEEEEEEEEEEEEVIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIL lurks around every corner.

Quote :

Magical force fields would also surround the buildings and homes to avoid collateral damage and keep the monsters outside.

Practice drills were held and everyone seemed to get the hang of it. Emergency supplies of food and water were passed all over the kingdom in case of long waiting periods. Lightning, of course, spent the whole week helping to deliver supplies, as was his job as town helper, but he was glad when the last of the supplies were dropped off. "Well, that should be all of it, Kyrsta."

... I hate to say it, but it seems like they're actually more prepared for this than Metropolis.

Quote :

His friends returned his greeting. "What's with the towel?" asked Krysta. Lightning also noticed that Artie didn't have his armor on and was merely wearing his exercising clothes, sweatband and he wore shoes instead of his boots on his hind legs. "Oh, no…! Please don't tell me…?" he groaned.

It was fitness-day- The day when all unicorns were to go through exercise workouts. It wasn't just all believing and having good skill to use magic, they also had to be in good shape and keep fit for normal everyday lives, as well as combat without magic.

Mandatory state-regulated exercise GOGOGO

Quote :

Participation was mandatory, with the exception of Krysta, of course. She wasn't a unicorn, and seemed fit and fiddles for her type.

DURRRRRRRRRRRR

Also, there's the fact that Tinker Bell is probably more useful than Lightning is. But don't tell the author that.

Quote :

Penny put them through all kinds of exercises, aerobics, even a little bit of track and field. Many of the unicorns did superb, but some didn't do so well. Lightning was doing the worst. He could hardly do so many push-ups; he couldn't leap over the jump pole, and during a period of timed jogging he finally collapsed. "Ugh…!"

Oh God this is just so fucking perfect- it's Lightning's entire character summed up!

Quote :

Krysta explained what happened, and Penny confirmed why. "You're overworked, Lightning. Oh, I should've known better than to put you put there. I'm sorry."

"I had wanted to put you in the filly program, but that would have been humiliating and I thought if you just BELIEVED hard enough you would've made it..."

Quote :

Lightning smiled sleepily, "Well… at least now I can get some rest."

Penny nodded, and said she check up on him later.

Krysta decided to get some rest too.

When Lighting woke up again, he felt much, much better. "I feel like I could lift up the moon." he joked. "Bad idea, that." Krysta said. "I don't think you could lift up anything that big."

Lightning laughed with her.

Did I miss the punchline or something?

Sceeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeneeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee Chaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaangeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

Quote :

Meanwhile, Titan had observed the conversation, then he turned to face Rep-Stallion, "And you say you have an idea over this…?" he asked.

... HOW!?

Quote :

"Yes, my lord." answered Rep "What finer way to capture those unicorns that by using something strong and sturdy, something immovable… solid as a rock maybe."

...

Quote :

Titan gave his minion an impatient glare. "Get to the point!"

"You're overpayed, like hell I'm paying you to just talk!"

Quote :

Rep-Stallion continued to explain, that against such a hard and heavy object, "The unicorns won't know what hit them. I will capture Lightning easily, and all his secrets will be yours, might Titan."

This story would honestly be cute if this was an 8 year old wanting to write something "Epic and butt-kicking awesome" but always remember this man when he wrote this was 25 YEARS OLD.

Quote :

As Rep-Stallion prepared for his mission, he suffered the ridicule of his teammates. "Even I know this plan of yours won't work, Rep-Stallion." mocked Mysterious.

It's really, really bad, when really stupid characters can see how retarded a plan is when the main antagonist can't.

Quote :

"Oh, sure you will…" Dementia said with sarcasm as she gazed at herself in her mirror from many angles.

For all the jokes I make on Dementia by pretending she's a 90 year old woman with dementia (again Mykan- way to drop the ball with that name), she's honestly like the most likeable character so far. She's an evil, less magnificent Rarity. Even the main antagonist is just a dumbshit who's afraid of breaking mirrors because bad luck.

And that's just really, really sad.

Sceeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeneeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee Chaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaangeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

So Starla is exercising too much because you know she's a woman and has no other real purpose than to be the love interest and make Lightning look good and shit.

Then, a wild REP-STALLIAN appeared!

Quote :

Rep reached behind him and held out a single ordinary rock he had found, and before the others could react, he reached into a pouch he was carrying, and dusted the rock once with yellow dust and again with blue. "That dust…!" yelped Lightning.

... Strong as a... strong as a...

...

Quote :

The rock began to glow magically as it grew in size and sprouted legs and arms, and an ugly face. Rep-Stallion laughed maliciously as the monster became complete.

...

HE REALLY THINKS HIS VILLAINS ARE BETTER THAN MY LITTLE PONY'S.

A wild STRONG STONE appeared!

Quote :

The monster pounded its huge feet which actually caused tremors which nearly knocked Lightning and Starla down. "Whoa…!" Lightning feared for Starla, since she wasn't in armor, but there was no place for her to go with the buildings all sealed off.

"Can't you just use the rainbow rod?" she asked.

"Now would be a nice time to not be useless!"

Quote :

"Not yet I can't… the time isn't right." Lightning had been studying and found out the best time to use the rainbow force was after the monster's weakness had been exposed. Using it now would do absolutely nothing. "That doesn't mean I can't try something else." And he got down on all fours and charged forward… but Strong Stone, lived up to his name by simply raising his huge stone fist to block Lightning from going any further and simply nudging him…

You know what? Lightning isn't a real mary sue. He's a failure sue. He's the big hero when his friends have to do the fighting until he delivers the last blow. I skipped it but Starla had a "Three of us and one of you" line. In other words, she considers Tinker Bell to be a serious fighter in this. That's right, Tinker Bell does more for the fight than he probably will.

Quote :

Starla features hardened. "My turn now…! STAR SHOWER…!"

Sadly, all that bombardment didn't even tickle the monster. "It's like hitting a solid rock."

The HURRRRR emote cannot even remotely begin to describe how retarded that statement was.

Quote :

"Are you afraid to fight us yourself?" Lightning snarled. "Bring it on!" snapped Rep-Stallion.

Despite that Lightning didn't have a weapon or any other magic on him; he managed to dodge all of Rep's scythe attacks. "Being strong isn't everything, you know."

What better quote for a failiure sue?

Tinker Bell gets the monster's attention. The monster attacks by shooting out meteors, and they trick him into shooting straight up (how a rock bends that way I don't know) only for it to crash down on him. So then they discover his weakness is his mouth! Starla shoots a beam into his mouth, then Lightning uses the ultra-manly Rainbow Rod to shoot a beam into it's mouth, and kills the fucking thing.

Rep runs away like a little bitch. Titan is dissapoint. Mysterious and Dementia laugh at how retarded Rep's idea was. Because it was. Ship teasing with Starla.

Quote :

Lightning nodded "You helped me take out that big brute and you weren't even wearing your armor. You see…? You already are strong and fit. So you really don't have to worry about what others think."

"Yeah, because even though the fairy and I did more in that fight than you did at least you have the plot devices to finish it off."

Really, Starla has no real role than being the obligatory love interest with no chemistry and she's STILL a more interesting character than Lightning can dream of being.

Quote :

(In Grand Ruler's palace)

*Grand Ruler is working out*

Grand Ruler: "Turn, and turn… and stree-ee-etch…! Ahh…!"

OH GOD THIS MENTAL IMAGE UGGGGGGGGGGH

Quote :

"Everyone has their own special shape and size, and while exercise is good for you sometimes, it's never a good idea to do too much. Having big muscles doesn't mean you are in good shape either, but there are other ways to get into better shape or stay in shape.

"The plot devices is what makes you really strong."

Quote :

"Eat healthy foods, drink plenty of water, get plenty of rest, and even doing regular chores can be a good workout."

Mykan. There are no little kids reading your story. Also, what the fuck, regular chores?

This might come across as a total surprise, but irl, Mykan is unemployed and lives off of welfare. Sound like another familiar manchild? Perhaps one who though lifting 12 case soda boxes counts as a real work out?

Quote :

"Starla has learned well today, and I am very proud of Lightning for helping her see that being strong is not everything, but being strong-minded and swift can be just as effective."

"See you all next time, and keep on believing!"

Everyone learned Lightning is a failiure. End chapter.

Next time- It's Raining Evil's Pouring.

I'm sure it'll be caca.

Oh man I am cracking up at that PSA bit at the end. 25-year-old man child watches waaaay too much children's programming.

sry if i necro'd this, but.. I HATE THIS SHIT EATING ATTENTION WHORE!   I know it's mean, but I got into a row with this guy and h blocked me. His whole thing is "canon drools, fanon rules."  Also he's a mysongyistic(?) bully who needs a lobotomy stat!  He claims to be autistic! Oh, one more thing: who/what is Project AFTER?

Project AFTER is kind of like our forum, only more pretentious and unfunny. Their entire repertoire of "humor" is based on sharing images of people making expressions and being deadpan.

I should know. I got banned because no one over there has a sense of humor or an open mind.

He sounds like he's either in a mental institution or needs to be in one. i don't think there are meds strong enough for what's wrong with him. I know from personal experience what it's like to be messed up in the head, but not like this. And he's not allowed to make phone calls or leave the house?! What, is he tied up or something?

Thanks for the answer. Have you read his profile lately? It's worse, MUCH worse! He rants non stop about his life which I doubt is worse than mine (joint problems, no car/job), and pretty much make ppl want to flame him! [i]I'm 23 and don't rant like he does[i] ! Someone put his  FF.Net bio on FiMfiction with his MLP in name only fics and it was a hate fest in the comments section. I also have a FF.net account :http://www.fanfiction.net/user/Kaimai

So, there’s this girl. She’s tragically orphaned and richer than anyone on the planet. Every guy she meets falls in love with her, but in between torrid romances she rejects them all because she dedicated to what is Pure and Good. She has genius level intellect, Olympic-athelete level athletic ability and incredible good looks. She is consumed by terrible angst, but this only makes guys want her more. She has no superhuman abilities, yet she is more competent than her superhuman friends and defeats superhumans with ease. She has unshakably loyal friends and allies, despite the fact she treats them pretty badly. They fear and respect her, and defer to her orders. Everyone is obsessed with her, even her enemies are attracted to her. She can plan ahead for anything and she’s generally right with any conclusion she makes. People who defy her are inevitably wrong.

God, what a Mary Sue.

I just described Batman.

Wish fulfillment characters have been around since the beginning of time. The good guys tend to win, get the girl and have everything fall into place for them. It’s only when women started doing it that it became a problem.

TV Tropes on the origin of Mary Sue:

The prototypical Mary Sue is an original female character in a fanfic who obviously serves as an idealized version of the author mainly for the purpose of Wish Fulfillment.

Notice the strange emphasis on female here. TV Tropes goes on to say that is took a long time for the male counterpart “Marty Stu” to be used. “Most fanfic writers are girls” is given as the reason. So when women dominate a genre, that means people are on close watch, ready to scorn any wish fulfillment they may engage in. This term could only originate if the default was female.

In fact, one of the CONTROVERSIES listed on the TV Tropes page is if a male sue is even possible. That’s right, it’s impossible to have an idealizied male character. Men are already the ideal.

In our culture, male tends to be the default. Women take on the distaff parts. “Him” and “mankind” are what humanity are, “her” and “womankind” are secondary. Yet this isn’t true for Mary Sue as a term. That name was created first. It was a Star Trek fic that coined it and the female desigination was likely a big reason it caught on. This female is name the default to use when describing idealized characters. Marty Stu and Gary Stu are only to be used if you’re discussing men specifically. Heck, there isn’t even an agreed upon term for them. So the only time female can be default is when discussing a badly written character, someone who is more powerful or important or liked than they should be allowed to be, someone the plot focuses on more than you would like, someone you don’t want to read about. Hmmm.

What’s really wrong with a thirteen year old girl having a power fantasy, even if it’s badly written? Who is it hurting? Men have baldly admitted to writing power fantasies and self inserts since the beginning of time. How many nerdy, schlubby guys suddenly become badasses and have hot girls chasing after them in fiction? See: Spiderman- blatant everyman who happens to stumble across amazing powers and catch the eye of a supermodel. Mary Sue is considered the worst insult to throw at a character as it renders them worthless. But since when are idealized characters automatically worthless? Aren’t all heroes idealized in some way? Don’t all heroes represent the author in some way? Aren’t these characters supposed to be people we look up to, people who represent human potential, the goodness that we strive for? Fantasy by nature is idealized, even the tragic ones.

If you look at the TV Tropes page for Mary Sue, it’s ridiculous. You can be a sue for having too many flaws, or not enough, for fixing things or messing things up, for being a hero or a villain. And of course, this is specifically pointed out as a trope related to the Princess and Magical Girl genres- genres aimed towards women are naturally full of Mary Sues. Magical girls are powerful and heroic and actually flaunt femininity as a good thing. They are a power fantasy designed for girls. So of course, a girl using traditionally feminine traits to dominate and triumph means she’s a sickeningly pure Mary Sue who makes everything go their way. Feminine traits are disdained and look down on, so when the positive feminine traits are prominent, the reader has an aversive reaction. How can a character be so feminine and triumph? She must be unrealistic, she must be badly written, because everyone knows it is impossible to be feminine and powerful.

Let’s look at what kinds of Mary Sues people will point to. People will claim a female character is a Mary Sue if she is a love interest. Put a female character within a foot of a male character, and people will scream “Mary Sue!” Why does someone falling in love with her make her a Mary Sue? Well, she hasn’t “earned” this awesome dude character’s love. What has she done to show she’s worthy of him? Fans miss the irony that this line of logic makes the male character seem more like the Sue in Question, as he’s apparently so perfect one has work for his coveted love and praise.

The idea that woman has to “earn” any power, praise, love, or plot prominence is central to Mary Sue. Men do not have to do this, they are naturally assumed to be powerful, central and loveable. That’s why it’s the first thing thrown at a female character- what has she done to be given the same consideration as a male character? Why is she suddenly usurping a male role? “Mary Sue” is the easiest way to dismiss a character. It sounds bad to say “I don’t like this female character. I don’t like that this woman is powerful. I don’t like it when the plot focuses on her. I don’t like that a character I like has affections for her.” But “Mary Sue” is a way to say these things without really saying them. It gives you legitimacy.

If a character is badly written, there’s generally something much more problematic than idealization going on. The plot will be dull and the character will perpetuate harmful stereotypes while other characters act oddly. For instance, Bella Swan is one of the only characters I’d even begin to classify as a Mary Sue, yet it’s not really her supposed Mary Sue traits that bother me. I don’t mind that she gets what she wants and everyone loves her, that she’s Meyer’s power fantasy. What I actually mind is that Stephenie Meyer has her perpetuate harmful anti-woman stereotypes- women need to be protected, women are shallow, women’s worth rests in desirability. That’s what’s actually harmful about her and worth discussing. I would criticize that rather than even get to the fact Bella got to be “too perfect and powerful”- that’s just a tiny, insignificant thing not worth mentioning in a huge pile of problems.

And that’s why I don’t call characters Mary Sue anymore. There’s really nothing bad about a power fantasy or wish fulfillment. It’s what’s fiction’s about. If one of my characters is called a Sue, I’ll proudly say “yep”, because that must mean that she broke out of that box a female character is supposed to be in. So I’ll go and say it: I love me some Mary Sues.

What you just wrote is nothing but shit. Nothing. But. Shit. Are you serious? Does this woman really miss the point that it's not how powerful a character is, it's how well the character is written! Nobody's calling Fate or Nahona a Mary Sue, and they could probably level continents.

I have been thinking about a lot of that stuff myself, tbh. I am p sure the reason these types of characters in fanfic tend to be female is partially because fanfic writers tend to be female but also partially because actual canon tends to have very few lady characters in nice meaty role doing badass things. After watching several dozen shows where the dude who is the best of the best fighter/ racer/ starship pilot/ card game player etc is always a man I can understand wanting to write about a woman getting to be the hero for once.

Of course if you look at webcomics I find there are a lot more male blatant self-inserts that everyone loves for no good reason even though they are annoying shitheads, haha.

I'm with Disco Stu on this one, pretty much any time someone is complaining about a trope or stereotype involving a marginalized group it starts to look like a very specific kind of hate real quick. Plus, I imagine the venn diagram of "dudes that hate mary sues" and "dudes that love superman or equivalent" has a hell of a lot of overlap.

Reepicheep-chan wrote:

I have been thinking about a lot of that stuff myself, tbh.  I am p sure the reason these types of characters in fanfic tend to be female is partially because fanfic writers tend to be female but also partially because actual canon tends to have very few lady characters in nice meaty role doing badass things.

It's also interesting to note the how many fanfic readers on this forum are women... Flipping shit toward other women who write Mary Sues. Ladies, please, we have got to let our boobies bounce in solidarity.

Eeveegou wrote:

It's also interesting to note the how many fanfic readers on this forum are women... Flipping shit toward other women who write Mary Sues. Ladies, please, we have got to let our boobies bounce in solidarity.

Haha, well when I am reading fanfic I am not real interested in reading about some OC who is shoving themselves into he spotlight for whatever reason, it is just not that interesting. But I understand why fans do it, and shit I have done the same in my youth. IDK I do not hate girls who write them, esp. the young girls who do it the most often, but they can be pretty hilarious to make fun of when they are way over-the-top. So IDK what I think, honestly.

Reepicheep-chan wrote:

Haha, well when I am reading fanfic I am not real interested in reading about some OC who is shoving themselves into he spotlight for whatever reason, it is just not that interesting.  But I understand why fans do it, and shit I have done the same in my youth. IDK I do not hate girls who write them, esp. the young girls who do it the most often, but they can be pretty hilarious to make fun of when they are way over-the-top.  So IDK what I think, honestly.

I did kind of gloss over the fact that self-insert power fantasies are pretty dumb no matter what, especially when you're an ameteur writer. The excess of anger towards a tropesworth of people who do that is really the only part that rubs me the wrong way, but even then I don't care as much if it's a man being bombarded vs. a woman. I think I had a couple sentences about that in my post but they seemed unwieldly? I don't remember.

I agree with what was said by Disco Stu. A lot of people who jumped on the Mary-Sue meme seem to be expressing a dislike of any female character who seems to do too much in a story. Others seem to believe all OCs have to be mediocre, no matter how well they fit in the story - and that exigence falls disproportionately on female characters.

The defining feature of the Sue, no matter the gender or the guise it appears in is that it's an OC for whom the universe bends backwards to accomodate. While I can't enforce my definitions on everyone else, it's the one that fits the concept the most.
Let's take Bella Swan: she's constantly described as uninteresting and plain, and yet all men in her new school fall for her - the ones who don't are shown to be bad people. Bella's world is divided so that the characters' morality aligns with their liking of Bella and her romance with Edward.
I'd like to say Batman ends up veering into such territory a lot, especially when authors keep making him upstage everyone in ensemble stories.
That's the kind of thing that would be grating in an OC thrown into an established universe, and in fact is a mark of many of the worst badfic writers, from Chris-Chan to Cori Falls.