Womens Topless March Attracts Men

itt: american values

Jesus. wrote:

No one says "gratuitous gore" or "gratuitous violence" or anything like that.

Mmm, have to argue here, in that I have seen that used, but mainly in the context of horror or exploitation/gore cinema. Just a nitpick, though.

Jesus wrote:

It's "gratuitous boobs" or "gratuitous sex." And who gets naked first? Always the woman. There is not sexy cinematography of the mans body because the movie is generally tailored to straight men. You'll never see an action movie tailored to straight women where the woman initiates, strips him, has the lingering gazes all over the abs, the bulge, the contours of his back and waist close ups of his face, his sex sounds... I could go on.

...



...That is so hot that I bolded the hottest parts because I am demanding that this film be made RIGHT NOW.

Jesus wrote:

And if there is a movie like that, its generally because the woman is not only badass, but known for using her sexual power, which, again, is usually code for whore. Come to think of it, I honestly don't know how you would cinema-graphically plan a movie where the sexual "conquest" IS the man. Like I honestly don't know how that would go.

IT MUST GO BECAUSE IT SOUNDS AWESOME

Jesus wrote:

Oh wait, never mind. Mens scent commercials. remember that Aqua Di Gio one? In black and white with waves, then wet body, waves than wet body, waves, face? That was hot.

Yeah, you ARE right, those do generally feature pretty heavy female-centric (or the ad-makers' idea of what's female-centric) visual eroticization of the male body, which is pretty damn cool.

Chaltab wrote:

I'd call a man who is constantly sleeping with multiple sex partners a slut. I don't think being promiscuous is something to be proud of regardless of your sex.

Why?

InkWeaver wrote:

Chaltab wrote:

I'd call a man who is constantly sleeping with multiple sex partners a slut. I don't think being promiscuous is something to be proud of regardless of your sex.

Why?

...Because I don't hold men to a different standard than women? Because being promiscuous demonstrates stupidity, commitment issues, or at the very least low self esteem?

Chaltab wrote:

InkWeaver wrote:

Chaltab wrote:

I'd call a man who is constantly sleeping with multiple sex partners a slut. I don't think being promiscuous is something to be proud of regardless of your sex.

Why?

...Because I don't hold men to a different standard than women? Because being promiscuous demonstrates stupidity, commitment issues, or at the very least low self esteem?

Or a strong sex drive.

Chaltab wrote:

InkWeaver wrote:

Chaltab wrote:

I'd call a man who is constantly sleeping with multiple sex partners a slut. I don't think being promiscuous is something to be proud of regardless of your sex.

Why?

...Because I don't hold men to a different standard than women? Because being promiscuous demonstrates stupidity, commitment issues, or at the very least low self esteem?

If they're being safe and not being horrible to their partners, its not a huge deal how much sex they have. It needs to be between consenting adults that understand the nature of the encounter- if thats the case then there's no harm done and hopefully everyone is satisfied.

See, this is what I mean. Third party, snap judgments, mystique, etc etc. I am not a huge fan of having multiple sex partners, but thats because most of the time, you hear of promiscuous people either being jerks (typically men) or sluts (typically women), and not just people who enjoy sex. There is also the assumption, your assumption, that someone who enjoys a lot of sex with multiple partners has underlying problems. Polyamoury, heavily sexual marriages, open relationships, consta-dating, one night stands, etc are all perfectly valid relationship styles that can be carryed out by mentally and emotionally healthy people, and can in fact, be better for them. Commitment means different things to different people, and tbh, commitment is not for everyone.

Malganis wrote:

Jesus wrote:

Oh wait, never mind. Mens scent commercials. remember that Aqua Di Gio one? In black and white with waves, then wet body, waves than wet body, waves, face? That was hot.

Yeah, you ARE right, those do generally feature pretty heavy female-centric (or the ad-makers' idea of what's female-centric) visual eroticization of the male body, which is pretty damn cool.

I just thought of something else! Remember in Why Did I Get Married where Sheila (the fat woman who had the dick husband) was staring down the Sheriff guy when he was stocking the general store? The closeups of the back of his neck, his shoulder blade, his armpit and elbow? Not my favorite parts of the body, but thats one of the better (perhaps the few) examples of sexy male body cinematography. And I loved her faces the whole time. It was adorable and hot at the same time. xD

Chaltab wrote:

InkWeaver wrote:

Chaltab wrote:

I'd call a man who is constantly sleeping with multiple sex partners a slut. I don't think being promiscuous is something to be proud of regardless of your sex.

Why?

Because being promiscuous demonstrates stupidity, commitment issues, or at the very least low self esteem?

Says who?

Jesus. wrote:

Verandering wrote:

... Wow, Jesus., I think you just outlined for me pretty much exactly why I'm asexual. Hm.

Now
if only I could afford a mental health professional out
here.

It's pretty much the reason I'm still a virgin. I want to
have sex, or even really just find someone, but I'm scared about what
it will mean to my identity, my purity, whether or not I can
handle the sexual jungle, the power struggles, etc etc.

I say this as someone who went through the same inner struggles while
thinking about sex (before I got to college, oh...college,): Sex is NOT
that much of a huge, pivotal experience. When you peel back the social
connotations, it's honestly a physical act between two people. The two
people don't necessarily have to be in love, or in like, or even know
eachother very well. Granted, I have personally found that the
experience is better when it's shared with someone you care about, but
even this doesn't necessarily need to be within the bounds of a
traditional romantic relationship.

It's just that people tend to conflate sex with love when they really
aren't one and the same, or even comparable. Love is definitely a
life-changing pivotal experience, but sex...it's just sex. Really.

Regarding the bolded part of your comment, though what does purity
mean to you in this context? I'm earnestly asking because I want to
know what your feelings are on that before I decide whether or not to
give you advice on it.

Bamshalam wrote:

Jesus. wrote:

Verandering wrote:

... Wow, Jesus., I think you just outlined for me pretty much exactly why I'm asexual. Hm.

Now if only I could afford a mental health professional out
here.

It's pretty much the reason I'm still a virgin. I want to
have sex, or even really just find someone, but I'm scared about what
it will mean to my identity, my purity, whether or not I can
handle the sexual jungle, the power struggles, etc etc.

I say this as someone who went through the same inner struggles while
thinking about sex (before I got to college, oh...college,): Sex is NOT
that much of a huge, pivotal experience. When you peel back the social
connotations, it's honestly a physical act between two people. The two
people don't necessarily have to be in love, or in like, or even know
eachother very well. Granted, I have personally found that the
experience is better when it's shared with someone you care about, but
even this doesn't necessarily need to be within the bounds of a
traditional romantic relationship.

It's just that people tend to conflate sex with love when they really
aren't one and the same, or even comparable. Love is definitely a
life-changing pivotal experience, but sex...it's just sex. Really.

Regarding the bolded part of your comment, thoughI what does purity
mean to you in this context? I'm earnestly asking because I want to
know what your feelings are on that before I decide whether or not to
give you advice on it.

I guess a big part of it is that I don't really trust other people with me. Its not really about *love* so much as it is communication, sharing, intimacy. I mean, it's probably not a big deal in the long run because it really is just a physical act, but I feel like somehow, I'll have lost something about me. I feel like i'll be scared, I'll be lost, and I'll have made a huge mistake that I will beat myself up for. I don't really trust men, as I think you can see up there, and I'm not particularly open to sex with women. Just feels like unless its with someone that I KNOW I can trust, I feel like I'll have given myself up. I grew up with madonna/whore, men are pigs, some day my prince will come, yada yada that even though I *know* is bullshit, it's still heavily a part of me. Never really had a boyfriend, I don't really know who I am so I don't know what it is to trust myself with another person, and I don't really even *like* myself that much, I just sort of coast being me and don't expect things to happen with me. To be with another person would make it all too real. Not sure I can handle that.

I don't want to fuck just to drive home to myself that it's just fucking. I'm probably setting myself up for disappointment and mass amounts of fail, but whatever. I'm 19 years old, in college, I have friends, still kinda unfulfilled, etc. Come too far to turn back now. Plus all the bodily fluids are just EW. I can barely tolerate my own fluids, kthx. I'm not waiting for marriage, twu wub, or anything like that. I'm looking to finally be comfortable with myself and being with another person like that.

Nihilist wrote:

Chaltab wrote:

...Because I don't hold men to a different standard than women? Because being promiscuous demonstrates stupidity, commitment issues, or at the very least low self esteem?

Or it demonstrates that you like something that's perfectly natural. Now I know promiscuity can be bad in a relationship where one person expected the other to be committed, because it's a blow to the faithful person's self-esteem ("Was I not good enough?") But that's why one has to talk it over beforehand and come to a mutual understanding before they decide to let their relationship go to shit. I usually drop the girls who go "Now don't cheat on me!" after explaining I'll go out, screw whoever I damn please (safely of course), then come back and have the real quality time with her.

Um.

No.

The issue with cheating, aside from the emotional betrayal of what was thought to be a mutual agreement, is the fact that sleeping around opens up your partner to all manner of diseases that you could, theoretically, pick up from other people. It's one thing if you're sleeping around on your lonesome, but seriously, do not do that shit to other people. That's all manner of foul.

Bamshalam wrote:

Nihilist wrote:

Chaltab wrote:

...Because I don't hold men to a different standard than women? Because being promiscuous demonstrates stupidity, commitment issues, or at the very least low self esteem?

Or it demonstrates that you like something that's perfectly natural. Now I know promiscuity can be bad in a relationship where one person expected the other to be committed, because it's a blow to the faithful person's self-esteem ("Was I not good enough?") But that's why one has to talk it over beforehand and come to a mutual understanding before they decide to let their relationship go to shit. I usually drop the girls who go "Now don't cheat on me!" after explaining I'll go out, screw whoever I damn please (safely of course), then come back and have the real quality time with her.

Um.

No.

The issue with cheating, aside from the emotional betrayal of what was thought to be a mutual agreement, is the fact that sleeping around opens up your partner to all manner of diseases that you could, theoretically, pick up from other people. It's one thing if you're sleeping around on your lonesome, but seriously, do not do that shit to other people. That's all manner of foul.

Weeeell, I think what he's talking about is an open relationship, which actually is not hard to find or maintain if both partners are ok with it. Plus, he said he is very safe about it. I think this is a case of terrible wording.

Jesus. wrote:

Bamshalam wrote:

Jesus. wrote:

Verandering wrote:

... Wow, Jesus., I think you just outlined for me pretty much exactly why I'm asexual. Hm.

Now if only I could afford a mental health professional out
here.

It's pretty much the reason I'm still a virgin. I want to
have sex, or even really just find someone, but I'm scared about what
it will mean to my identity, my purity, whether or not I can
handle the sexual jungle, the power struggles, etc etc.

I say this as someone who went through the same inner struggles while
thinking about sex (before I got to college, oh...college,): Sex is NOT
that much of a huge, pivotal experience. When you peel back the social
connotations, it's honestly a physical act between two people. The two
people don't necessarily have to be in love, or in like, or even know
eachother very well. Granted, I have personally found that the
experience is better when it's shared with someone you care about, but
even this doesn't necessarily need to be within the bounds of a
traditional romantic relationship.

It's just that people tend to conflate sex with love when they really
aren't one and the same, or even comparable. Love is definitely a
life-changing pivotal experience, but sex...it's just sex. Really.

Regarding the bolded part of your comment, thoughI what does purity
mean to you in this context? I'm earnestly asking because I want to
know what your feelings are on that before I decide whether or not to
give you advice on it.

I guess a big part of it is that I don't really trust other people with me. Its not really about *love* so much as it is communication, sharing, intimacy. I mean, it's probably not a big deal in the long run because it really is just a physical act, but I feel like somehow, I'll have lost something about me. I feel like i'll be scared, I'll be lost, and I'll have made a huge mistake that I will beat myself up for. I don't really trust men, as I think you can see up there, and I'm not particularly open to sex with women. Just feels like unless its with someone that I KNOW I can trust, I feel like I'll have given myself up. I grew up with madonna/whore, men are pigs, some day my prince will come, yada yada that even though I *know* is bullshit, it's still heavily a part of me. Never really had a boyfriend, I don't really know who I am so I don't know what it is to trust myself with another person, and I don't really even *like* myself that much, I just sort of coast being me and don't expect things to happen with me. To be with another person would make it all too real. Not sure I can handle that.

Ok, that's entirely fair. I hope that gets easier for you in the long run; it's an extremely personal thing, so I'm not going to inundate you with my opinions. Just wait until you're ready, is all I'd say. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

Jesus. wrote:

Plus all the bodily fluids are just EW. I can barely tolerate my own fluids, kthx. I'm not waiting for marriage, twu wub, or anything like that. I'm looking to finally be comfortable with myself and being with another person like that.

SEMEN IS SO GROSS I'M SO GLAD I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE WHO SEES THAT.
But, ignoring that, it's good to see someone who's not ready for sex readily admit so, you know? It's way better than rushing in.

Bamshalam wrote:

Jesus. wrote:

Plus all the bodily fluids are just EW. I can barely tolerate my own fluids, kthx.

SEMEN IS SO GROSS I'M SO GLAD I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE WHO SEES THAT.

DUDE SERIOUSLY. Its bodily goo, guys, kinda gross. The idea of oral sex still freaks me out, giving or receiving. Everyone says YEAH I USED TO BE THAT WAY TOO BUT NOW ITS LIKE CRACK SEMEN VAGINAL GOO NOM NOM

I'm like, good for you.

Zoey wrote:

-Two men followed me along the street on a day it was fucking hot so I had bare legs.

Maybe you and them were going to the same location? I mean, the other two are kind of inexcusable, but here you're just being stupid.

Mikey Go WOOGA wrote:

Zoey wrote:

-Two men followed me along the street on a day it was fucking hot so I had bare legs.

Maybe you and them were going to the same location? I mean, the other two are kind of inexcusable, but here you're just being stupid.

I don't know, saying "hey lady" and making a noise like you're calling a cat kind of implies they were after me.

Mikey, sweetie, I'm so pleased you recognised this behaviour as inexcusable. You're doing way better than most of the men in this thread.

Nihilist wrote:

Just, the thing is, it's hard to find someone who isn't repressed, or someone who has a high enough drive to want to fuck 3 times a day, or even someone willing to put up with how terrible I can be in regards to this because to so many, this act means a lot more than what it is.

God damn, Nil, why do you live in the wrong country?

Chaltab, can you explain what's wrong with not wanting commitment?

I have to admit it's debates like this that leave me wondering 'why the fuss?' because I'm asexual. I don't exactly understand the fascination with certain body parts. I probably never will either.

Jesus. wrote:

I don't want to fuck just to drive home to myself that it's just fucking. I'm probably setting myself up for disappointment and mass amounts of fail, but whatever. I'm 19 years old, in college, I have friends, still kinda unfulfilled, etc.

I wouldn't worry to much lady, I didn't loose my virginity till I was 21 simply because (and this is true why I've gotten any since) I'm petrified of making a move on a lady in case I'm seen as one of these jerks who just objectifies women and uses them, 100% stone cold petrified, I was accused once and I spent the next two days tearing myself apart mentally till a mate brought me round.
Just enjoy being at collage and having good mates, trust me, it's better than the mind games you'll play with yourself.

Chaltab wrote:

InkWeaver wrote:

Chaltab wrote:

I'd call a man who is constantly sleeping with multiple sex partners a slut. I don't think being promiscuous is something to be proud of regardless of your sex.

Why?

...Because I don't hold men to a different standard than women? Because being promiscuous demonstrates stupidity, commitment issues, or at the very least low self esteem?

Maybe it's because you've never heard the word "lecher"?

Off topic, but someone's post reminded me of a documentary I watched the other night on the MPAA's film ratings system and how some films get labeled with a NC-17 rating (TO PROTECT TEH PRESUS CHILLENS!) for "inappropriate sex scenes" rather than violence. Examples of this was a "But I'm a Cheerleader" which showed a female masturbating over her clothes (NC-17 in the original cut, it's rated R now after editing) versus "American Beauty" which showed a guy masturbating in the shower (R); a male-on-male anal rape scene in "Boys Don't Cry" (NC-17 in the original cut, rated R after editing as above) versus... well, take your pick on films depicting sexual violence against women (all R, for the most part); John's Waters' film on sexual fetishes "A Dirty Shame" (rated NC-17 for "pervasive sexual content; " When the MPAA were asked what would needed to be cut to obtain an R rating, they replied that if everything the MPAA objected to were to be removed, the movie would only be 10 minutes long.") versus the crude sexual humor (and violence) of "Scary Movie" (rated R). The list goes on.

... yeah, anyway, it was an enlightening documentary of how movies get rated, why the rating is what it is, and the comparison between sex and violence in the movies and how that affects the rating.

IMDB link to the documentary.

Chaltab wrote:

InkWeaver wrote:

Chaltab wrote:

I'd call a man who is constantly sleeping with multiple sex partners a slut. I don't think being promiscuous is something to be proud of regardless of your sex.

Why?

...Because I don't hold men to a different standard than women? Because being promiscuous demonstrates stupidity, commitment issues, or at the very least low self esteem?

This is a mindset I could never understand.

Stupidity - if you put your health at risk, you're stupid. If you put your partner's health at risk, you're stupid and an arsewipe. But otherwise, how exactly does my enjoyment of sex translate to a lack of intellectual prowess?

Commitment issues - possibly, in some cases. But I fail to see why an exclusive relationship is somehow a prerequisite for sex. I mean, logically speaking, these are two different things. You can want one and not want the other, both ways.

Low self-esteem is the most baffling one to me. My gut reaction was, well, when I'm having a bad day the last thing I want to do is hoist my insecurities onto anyone else, so if anything, I have sex when I feel good with myself. Then it dawned on me that you probably view sex as somehow demeaning, the way Cosmo-style guides tend to - that it's a prize to be won after carefully following the prescribed steps, that it's something you give to another person and never get back, finally that it's an expression of submission to another person's will. And that is, frankly, a view which I can't even coherently comment on.

Apologies, but I'm currently working with a text which describes women as "overflowing buckets of unfulfilled love", and I can't tell the author off for being a pretentious snotwaffle, so I had to vent. I'll return to my scheduled lurking now that I got this out of my system.

^Don't. I like you.

Yeah, I remember you from green GAFF. I remember you being a poster I always read the posts of.

Aahh. Finally, we've had "WOMEN LEER AT MEN TOOOOO", "WELL I CALL MEN SLUTS THEREFORE SOMETHING" and of course "HAVING SEX, I MEAN BEING PROMISCUOUS, MEANS YOU HAVE ISSUES". I think that's about everything, do you?

I really need more alcohol in my system before this thread starts to be coherent.

Seriously people, your attention spans are like a Golden Retriever's.

Cyberwulf wrote:

Aahh. Finally, we've had "WOMEN LEER AT MEN TOOOOO", "WELL I CALL MEN SLUTS THEREFORE SOMETHING"

Maybe "therefor people and society aren't as totally unfair as you're clearly hell-bent on believing they are?"

gaijinguy wrote:

Cyberwulf wrote:

Aahh. Finally, we've had "WOMEN LEER AT MEN TOOOOO", "WELL I CALL MEN SLUTS THEREFORE SOMETHING"

Maybe "therefor people and society aren't as totally unfair as you're clearly hell-bent on believing they are?"

No, I'm pretty sure it's "therefore my experience means everyone who has experienced life differently is clearly delusional". But please, mansplain and minimise sexism more.