Failure Fantasy: Rape the Queen's English and Other Bedtime Stories Possibly NSFW

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Reno  says:
 It was night time in the city of Midgar,and it was a stormy night too,Reno walked down the streets in the sector seven slums and sighed due he was sent out on a solo mission by Tseng,which is his first solo mission when he joined the turks.

Reno was walking down the streets and feel slightly uneasy,just then a gang stopped him and they were laughing and had evil smirks.Few hour later Reno gotten back to his and Rude's apartment and had a shower,he was still in the shower when his partner got home.

Man, this happens to me off and on when I go to the bar on campus and it's close to closing time.  Stupid fratboys.  I guess he sat down with them and had a beer or three and headed home for a shower.

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RudeMun says:
 Rude quickly closed the front door welcomed by the sound of water running. He knew the other was here cause of his weapon thrown on the floor in a messy way.

Did it spooge on the carpet? 

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Heaving a deep sigh, the sharp turked walked towards where the water running,

You mean the bathroom?

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stopping infront of the bathroom.

Okay, there ya go.  Even if it is redundantly redundant. 

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'Im...tempted. But maybe he's not in the mood right now.' He tought while scratching the back of his head.-
 The thought of his partner dripped in water

... freaked him the hell out and he rushed in to save him.

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quickly made up his mind. Slowly, the turk twisted the doorknob and stealthy stepped in the steaming room. He undressed hastily taking off his glasses along the way, placing it on the counter. Then he cautionly...

.....dun dun duuuun.

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slid open the curtain. Looking the redhead up down not caring for the consequence. "Reno...Do you need help?" He asked as he stepped in
 Reno  says:
 Reno didnt answer,he heard Rude's voice but couldnt bare to look at him,but he grabed the towel and walked out of the shower and had tears rolling down his cheeks,his work clothes was on the floor and his pale and slender skin was covered in fresh marks from a fight and brusing around his lower area too.

Yes, Reno would turn into a weepy-eyed Uke after a fight.  And LOWER AREA?? FOR CRYING OUT LOUD. 

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RudeMun says:
 "Uh..uhh.."The other turk said dumbly as he quickly snatched his glasses and mentally cursed.

Yes.  That's the first thing Rude would have grabbed given that he was fucking NAKED.  e.e

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He knew he should'nt have done that. But why did reno have tears in his eyes? "Reno!" grabbing a towel also, Rude ran our after his close friend, taking his wrist, while daring.

Daring what? For some reason I have Weird Al running through my head.

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Turning the other around into a crushing hug. He hoped he did'nt scare the red-head, they hardly ever touched affectionly

Of course.  Men can't touch affectionately unless they're gay, dontchaknow. 

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"Tell me whats wrong..partner." He smirked as he remember thats reno's word.

What's Reno's word?  I've used all of those.  Do I owe royalty to Reno now?


 

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Reno  says:
 Reno felt Rude grabbing him,then pulling him into a hug,he looked down and was dripping wet from the shower,but was trembling due he was crying,Reno told Rude what happened on his solo mission what Tseng sent him on.
RudeMun says:
 Rude calmly stroked his long slender fingers

Why do they always have long slender fingers?

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against the redhead's spikes. Listening intentsly as he spoked about the ordeal. One thing Rude hated. His Partner getting hurt. Breathing in deeply after reno finished speaking, Rude stared down at the shorter male, frowning as he wipped away tears from his cheeks. "..Reno, you know I hate it when we're not on a mission together-"
 Snuggling his face into damped hair, Rude exhaled deeply, whisps of hair tickling his cheek "Who did this to you? Tell me now so Ill break their faces."

... break their faces.  Riiight.  Well, at least that's not as bad as it could have been.

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The turk whispered while pressing a light kiss ontop the blazing redhair.
Reno says:
Reno looked and blushed and said"I can't remeber,it happened so fast Partner,but I will be okay in a few days!"

So he was involved with them several hours but it happened so fast?  What?  For some reason I hear Reno talking like a southern belle, complete with hand over forehead. 

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he looked and smiled softly,During the night Reno was sitting in the bedroom window and was smoking,while thinking.

Wow, fast forward button.  Obviously there was nothing more important that could have happened during that time and Reno wouldn't, as a member of TURK, remember where he was, what faces looked like or have any idea that the guys were there and to avoid them.  Of COURSE NOT.  e.e

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RudeMun says:
Putting away his shades on the dresser, Rude walked over to the slim turk and sat beside him. He hated not wearing his shades since the saying /The eyes are the mirror to the soul./ Still haunts him.

It just started haunting me, too.  e.e

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He loves his friend more than he should, but he's afraid what the other thinks of the two of them. Shaking away negative thoughts, Rude smiled softly as he tooked the cancer stick out of the others-
Mouth and toward his own. Taking a deep inhale of the stick, he let out a breath coughing slightly. "T-these can kill you reno." Blushing slightly, he dropped the cigarrate and stomped on it.

On their bedroom carpet.  THAT'S going to make their landlord happy. 

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"I dont think Im ready to lose you let..Mate." He added quickly.
Reno says:
Reno looked and smirked and laughed softly,and said"I have been smoking for sometime now,you have only started,and also i dont smoke all the time just one or two!,at least you gotten me off the slums and working for the turks or i will be dead in that alley way if you didnt save me partner!"

This... speaks for itself, sadly. 

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he threw his cigirate out the window and gotten up and walked over to the bed.

Several hours later, the fire department has to come and put out the fire started in the topiary.

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RudeMun says:
"Reno...Just yesterday I found a pack of cigarrates under my pillow." Sighing at the turk's actions, Rude followed the other's movements out of the corner of his eyes. He knew if he screwed this up, the other might punch or never speak to him. "..You want me to take the couch?" He asked as he pointed his head towards the livingroom

You'd think with living together and being friends and so close they would have figured out sleeping arrangements by now.

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Reno says:
Reno looked and then shooked his head and said"nah you can sleep in the bed too!",When they began to settle down Reno cuddled upto Rude and was hugging rude like a teddy bear,Reno wasnt wearing much only a pair of sleep shorts.
RudeMun says:
Rude stared at Reno with big wide eyes as he calcuated the red's barely wearing a thing. Except a tenny tiny thin strip of cloth which is'nt helping his arousal! /Deep..breathes/ Breathing in, Rude slowly wrapped his arms around reno's slim waist, bringing him closer to his tall body, placing a small kiss ontop his hair. "..Comfty?" He whispered. /..You little tease/

Yes, by sleeping nearly naked he's obviously teasing him. 

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Reno says:
Reno looked and smirked

Okay, while Reno smirked twice in the movie, I'm sure he has other facial expressions.  USE THEM.

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and said"yeah I am comfy! and dont forget I always tease you!"

Oh, well, then, I guess it's just an understood.  Boy am I glad Reno told us!  Yes, I suppose Rude would forget that Reno teases him.  Too bad it doesn't help make anything else make sense.

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he looked and kissed him on the lips igoring the fact that he was raped few hours ago he wanted to spend some fun time with his partner.

In other words he's going to take advantage of the situation and, without reading any more, I can guess Reno goes along with it because after being raped the first thing you want is to make love to your one twu luv.  *gags*

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RudeMun says:
/Ohhh..my godd/ Pressing his lips against the others at his own pace. Thoughts came and went as the turk tried to figure out if this was actually happening. /..Oh Fuck it/ Flipping them over so that he was ontop, straddling the redhead's hips. Rude went down on Reno, Controlling the kiss while running his tongue across the young turks lips, asking for permisson.

Morbo says BLOWJOB NOT WORK THAT WAY! 

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Reno says:
Reno blinked a few times in suprisement,and opened his mouth and felt Rude kissing him,,and then felt Rude's tongue in his mouth,Reno was really shocked that Rude would of made his move first before Reno had a chance too.
RudeMun says:
Rude groaned into the others mouth tasting him and exploring the wet cavern as he pleased. Reno truly was like wine.

Of course he's cliche.

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Spicy and Addictive.

That's more Chipotle than wine in my experience.

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As he broked

Heh.  Broked.  Like my brain.

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from the kiss to catch his breath, Rude worked his mouth onto the turk's neck. Nipping and licking as he brought his hands up to the fondle with the pink nipples begging for attention. "..Wait Reno" Rude breathed as he fought control. "Are you...sure?

He doesn't care that his partner has been raped and wants fun time and NOW he gets a conscience?

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Reno says:
Reno looked up at Rude and was blushing and nodded and breatly said"Yeah I am sure,I want to feel you touching me,and inside me too,I want to get rid of this sent what those men put on me!"

Yes because it's not psychological at all.  Seriously???

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he looked and leaned up and kissed Rude on the lips again and then blew into his ear.

Who outside of a fourteen year old things blowing in someone's ear is sexy? 

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RudeMun says:
Shivering as he breathed into his ear, Rude nodded quickly as he slowly slid down his turk's boxers. Smirking at the straining erection while wrapping long slender fingers around it. "Ill erase what they marked on you Reno. No one will ever touch you again while Im by your side."

So what happens when he gets sent out on a solo mission again? 

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Saying this Rude crushed his lips onto Reno's sloppily, making his way south the turk, kissing everything along the way
Reno says:
Reno arched his back fully and moaned out softly,he was suprised that Rude wanted this as soon he came home from work,Reno loved Rude as a lover and a friend and a partner,but he is starting to think that Rude was only using him,when he was back on the streets.

.....WAT??

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Reno moaned Rude's name out.
RudeMun says:
"I know..Reno." The taller turk whispereed as his lips finally rest ontop of the dripping member.

He... might should get that checked. 

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Bringing a finger into his mouth, Rude wetted it, taking the digit out of his mouth inorder to wrap it around the crown of his head. Very carefully, he snucked his finger softly into the entranced of the turk, being really careful. As he done this, Rude suckled slowly on the member, wanting to bring 
More pleasure than pain

Then invest in some good lube and use it!

Quote :

Reno says:
Reno arched his back fully his body was begging for more from Rude,he was already hard his nipples was hard too,Reno tightn his hands on the bed sheets and moaned out in pleasure,Reno's face was flushed and was enjoying every moment,of it,Reno opened his eyes and looked down at Rude and moaned out again.just then Reno said quitly "I...cant hold it!"

Can't... hold... Ohgoodgods.

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RudeMun says:
Hearing this, the other turk clumsily whipped his head away from the dripping member, quickly positioning his body between Reno's legs. "Please try and hold it in Reno"

Hold it in??  WHAT?

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Rude whispered while sliding down his boxers, holding his hard member in his left hand. "Try to hold it in.." Saying this one last time, He gently pushed the straining cock inside the other, gasping at the tight heat.
Reno says:
Reno flung his head back and felt Rude's member going into him,he moaned out even more,Reno looked and said"R...rude I love you!"

Nothing like being raped and then fucked by a guy who doesn't give a shit that you were raped to draw out the expressions of love. 

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he looked up at Rude and was enjoying the moment,while he was under Rude,Few moments later the phone was ringing,Reno had his arms above his head and looked and saw it was Rude's phone and it was Tseng.Reno looked at Rude and waited to see what will happen.

I... I got nothin'.  There's too much that can be said here.

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RudeMun says:
Beginning to thrust harder into the small male. Rude's ears picked up on his ringtone /I like BIG butts i CANNOT LIE. You other bro's CANT DE-NY-/

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA!!!  **breathes** AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHA! 

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Snatching the phone off the dresser next to his shades, Rude frowned as he flipped open the phone. "Rude." Nodding ever so often, he sighed as he lightly closed it, only remembering Reno's confession. "Wha- What did you say?" Rude had to make it over-To the shinra building urgently, He regretfully crawled away from the young turk, grabbing his boxers before turning to look at the redhead.

Oh hell nah they would NOT have just left it hanging like that!  If Reno was about to blow it would have taken him just another few minutes to bang him and get the job done.  I don't know anyone who would have left things hanging like that.  Must just be so they can have ANGST!

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"Tseung saids

Who is this Tseung guy they're talking about?  New character?

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he needs me over urgently. Ill be back as soon as possible..Kay? Reno.." Sighing softly, Rude grabbed his clothes quickly putting them on along with his shades, While stepping out the small apartment into the cold night...
Reno says:
Reno was left there by his partner,and sat up and was fully naked and watched Rude leave the apartment,Reno looked down at himself and remebered what Tseng called him just few hours ago before he went out on that mission,Reno cuddled up and began to cry again and thought to himself "Is tseng telling me the truth that Rude is just been nice to me,but he is using me! for sex!"he looked down and gotten off the bed and went into the bathroom and had a shower,after he did he settled the sofabed up and collasped on it and sighed and Reno knew that he and Rude are partners and why tseng didnt ask for the both of them!",Reno gotten up and walked into the fridge and gotten a few cans of beer out.

Apparently Reno is also cracked out or something to be talking about he and Rude in the third tense.  Considering we've never seen that Rude has ever banged him before, I don't think that classifies as being used for sex.  Also, who the HELL makes an assumption like that out of nowhere??

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RudeMun says:
Rude watched his feet as he walked on, every now and them looking behind him when he heard the slightly moment. /Now Im being paronoid/ He sighed while rubbing his temple. He did'nt wanna leave his spicy addiction.

I'm pretty possessive of my burrito bowl, too.  Extra rice, corn and mild salsa, oregano... mmmm.

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He just hoped whatever the hell Tseung wanted better be worth it! And at 3:00 in the morning also, /Im sorry..Reno/ He thought as he looked up at the shinra building. Walking through- the double doors, Rude quietly made his way to Tseung's room. Not knowing the danger beyound the door
Reno says:
Meanwhile Reno was sitting on the sofa and was thinking about what Tseng wanted with Rude this time of the moring,speically its a saturday.Reno layed back only in a pair of shots and a shirt,and watched the tv.
RudeMun says:
"Oh Hell No.." Rude said outloud, purposely, on the sight that greeted him. Tseng sat under his desk with alligator hat on his head.

.....  *blink blink*  Wh--  Tseng called him out to... Are you fucking serious?

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"Not again...Tseng, I can assure you that there's noone trying to suck you into the closet.

Yes, because Tseng is obviously an incompetent buffoon since he runs Turk. 

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"And how would you know? Being the most hat-" "Tseng! This was a waste of time...Im goin home now.." Rude said shaking his head and walking out once more. He tooked out his-
phone and dialed Reno's number
Reno says:
Tseng watched Rude leave and sighed,Meanwhile back at the apartment Reno was laying on the sofa and was asleep,few moments later he awoke and saw the door opened and it was Rude,and said"Yo Rude,how are you doing!"he sounded drunk
RudeMun says:
"..Dont tell your drunk Reno" Rude sighed while looking into Reno's eyes, seeing them woozy.

Woozy eyes?  I think I saw that once.

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Taking the others arm without saying anything, He noticed the sun coming up from the horizon. "Reno, stop squirming so much, Look, we need to hurry and rest..

Hurry and rest.  How does that work exactly?

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Well, I need to and you need to sleep the alchohol away.." He said once they entered the bedroom
Reno says:
Reno looked and said"oh come on partner its the weekend we dont have to work!"he looked and tried to kiss Rude.
RudeMun says:
It felt like a ton of bricks hit his head "We-Weeke-" He was cut off by Reno's sloppily kiss, returning it right away as he fixed his glasses. Breaking away from the kiss slowly, The turk brought a hand to rest on Reno's cheek, frowning at the intoxicated look in his eyes "But Reno...Your still drunk" He sighed while pulling the other away and gently placing him in the bed. Joining him afterwards
Reno says:
Reno looked and pouted,few seconds when he was placed on the bed he fell asleep streight away cuddled upto Rude,

Few hours later in the afternoon Reno awoke with a headache
RudeMun says:
Waking up at the feel of reno's foot in his face, Rude removed his glasses and silently smirked at the others face. "Rude awakening Reno?" He wanted to laugh outloud but did'nt, he also did'nt wanna make breakfast! "...Come on Reno, we're going out, I cant cook and you dont look like your in the mood. Chop, chop out of bed!" He said while slapping the other's butt, putting his glasses on
Reno says:
Reno slowly opened his eyes and pulled the covers over his head and said"Man my head!"he cuddles up in the covers again
RudeMun says:
Rude paused midway out the door, looking back at the redhead. "..Reno.." Stalking back over the other, he lifted the aching turk bridalstyle, carrying him into the livingroom. dumping him on the couch as he did. "Now do you see why I hardly drink?" Quirking an eyebrow over his shades Rude contiuned, "It may taste good..but the end results are what ADs warn us about Reno.." Taller turk said as he-
flipped the other an asprin pill while he grabbed his keys, "We're going out"
Reno says:
Reno looked and blushed and landed on the sofa and tooked the painkillers and said"alright partner let me go and get dressed!"he looked down at himself and gotten up and headed back into the bedroom to get dressed and have a quick shower.

That's what... the fourth shower he's taken in this fic?  He's gotta have some damned good lotion to keep from having alligator skin. 

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before getting dressed.
RudeMun says:
Waiting for the other to hurryup, Rude checked his wallet finding that he had enough money. Well..being a turk of course he has money. He sighed as his belly rumbled, demanded for food. Feeling like he had'nt eaten in years..he was starving. Shaking his head away at such thoughts as Reno cameback out.. He flashed the other a small smile before going over to him "What do you feel like eating today-
"..Besides cereal"
Reno says:
Reno looked and then said"I am not sure!"he looked and began to think,few moments later they were in a small cafe and Reno was eatting some toast due to his hangover

Did Reno learn how to use teleport?  And since when is toast a hangover cure?  I'll have to try that next time I drink too much.

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RudeMun says:
Rude gabbled

He did what now?

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down his breakfast as fast as he could. He stared at Reno still chewing on a pancake that was still in his mouth

I thought Reno had toast. 

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"..Reno youh shouldsh eatsh smor than dat roast" Swallowing quickly, he lifted up his spoon that still had oatmeal on it." It this, it'll at least give you strength..SugarFREE." He stated knowing Reno loved sugar in everything

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Link? Or is it in the post and I just missed it?

I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT THIS AUTHOR DID WITH THE REAL RENO AND RUDE!

Sweet Jesus on a trike. I have never been able to understand authors who write Reno as a frail weepy little uke. This is the man who dropped the fuckin' plate on Sector Seven, folks. He killed God knows how many people because President Shinra TOLD him to. He's a Turk. He wears the uniform. I would think even gangs would think twice before messing with a Turk, because they tend to take one of their own getting hurt very seriously. You mess with a Turk, you're looking at a major beatdown.

And just because Rude doesn't say much doesn't make him a lumbering neandethral who'd force sex on his partner after he'd been raped.

Sparrow wrote:

Link? Or is it in the post and I just missed it?

It was an RP sample sent to me via messenger in RTF. There isn't a link. I take it that's something I need before posting? If so, I'll take it down.

Solitia wrote:

Sparrow wrote:

Link? Or is it in the post and I just missed it?

It was an RP sample sent to me via messenger in RTF. There isn't a link. I take it that's something I need before posting? If so, I'll take it down.

Hmm, I honestly have no clue if a fic is not allowed to be snarked on WGW if is not posted somewhere else you can link to. You may want to ask Nihilist.

This. Is. asdfgh.

...that's all I can say right now. O.o