German Children Starting Primary School Get Surprise

Now I consider this news. Not necessarily Godawful news (though I probably wouldn't feel that way if I were one of these kids parents). Call it 'Odd' news.


German Party Mistakenly Hands Out Porn Pens to Kids

Quote :

To sweeten their first day at primary school German children are normally given a cardboard cone filled with sweets, but schoolchildren in Essen this year opened their cones to find pens which project erotic images.

Children attending the Adolf Reichwein School in the northwestern German city were handed cones containing the pens by members of the German Communist Party, according to the school's headmaster.

Angry parents who discovered that the pens given to their six-year-old children could project erotic images of women informed the headmaster.

In a press release the German Communist Party stated that it had purchased the pens from a discount store, which had said the pens lit up at the push of a button.

Mayhaps they should've enquired as to what, exactly 'lit up' when you pushed the button?

Quote :

"The German Communist Party deeply regrets what has happened and is outraged that this kind of thing, which borders on pornography, can be purchased in normal shops," it said, adding that its lawyers were now investigating whether the vendors could be prosecuted.

Actually, it doesn't border on pornography-it sounds like out and out pornography. Especially when you're giving it to small children.

Quote :

The party has offered to exchange the pens for something more suitable for children.

Here's to hoping no one offers than a good price on bags of 'novelty party balloons.

Rabid Badger wrote:

Here's to hoping no one offers than a good price on bags of 'novelty party balloons.

...B-but they're bubblegum flavour!

Rabid Badger wrote:

Quote :

"The German Communist Party deeply regrets what has happened and is outraged that this kind of thing, which borders on pornography, can be purchased in normal shops," it said, adding that its lawyers were now investigating whether the vendors could be prosecuted.

Actually, it doesn't border on pornography-it sounds like out and out pornography. Especially when you're giving it to small children.

Oh, please. If they're the same pens they sell in Amsterdam, they just show the picture of *gasp* a naked woman. Not suitable, but hardly the end of the world and definitely not 'out and out pornography'. And how does giving these kind of things to children make them more pornographic? Young children are slightly clueless about sex, last time I checked. They probably liked the light a lot better than the lady without clothes.

...Also, is the inappropriate Nazi joke in the subtitle a sort of inverse Godwin's? You win the thread by invoking it immediately? I'm sure the German Communist Party will forgive the comparison if that had been the intent.

I'm with Jay on this, it doesn't sound like a big deal. Hell, it's a good opportunity for a little bit of sex education.

What upsets me most about this story is that those damn, dirty Commies tried to screw the kids out of their sweets. Sure, pens are nice and practical gifts, but when I was their age, I would have traded every pen in the house for a chocolate bar in a blink.

Maybe this debacle has taught them a lesson about fixing what ain't broke.

With Jay and Zo. In Germany, "pornography" is defined as imagery showing explicit sexual acts (what's known as softcore in the US even runs under "erotic movie," not porn - porn is people either penetrating each other or, in case of lesbian porn, stimulating each other's genitalia). It's a tad inappropriate and definitely a fuck-up on the part of the party, but seeing a naked woman isn't going to scar the kids for life.

My dad had pens where the women had a black negligee-formed spot on when it was turned one way and were naked when you turned it around when I was a kid. I didn't find them to be particularly titillating OR scarring, being that I was 6 and wasn't raised to consider nakedness horrifying. They wouldn't have been appropriate for use in schools, of course, which is where the problem is (if I was one of those parents, I'd have raised an eyebrow at that particular gift, myself), but overall, I'd consider that a minor gaffe.

Yeah, what's with the Nazi joke? As far as I know, the Nazis would have put the Communist Party in concentration camps for their degenerate views.


What I don't get, what business does any political party have filling first-graders' Schultüten? Politics? Small children? Hello?

grmblfjx wrote:

Yeah, what's with the Nazi joke? As far as I know, the Nazis would have put the Communist Party in concentration camps for their degenerate views.


What I don't get, what business does any political party have filling first-graders' Schultüten? Politics? Small children? Hello?

... you know, I did not even comment on the Nazi joke. Yeah, Badger, good job on actually being offensive. That's about the worst thing you can call a contemporary German and goes completely counter to who ACTUALLY gave them the stuff. I know this is meant to be flippantly, but really, do you go around calling, say, French people "frog-eating surrender monkeys" etc? This is Mikey's M.O. right there, and he's trolling 90% of the time.

Contrary to stereotype, most of us do have a sense of humor, but for many, it stops right at that line.

As for why they were filling the Schultüten... for one, they were probably primarily trying to gain favor with the parents (which backfired rather spectacularly, I'd say!), for another... "get 'em while they're young," right?

Saleha wrote:

for another... "get 'em while they're young," right?

But that's exactly my point! Who would, approached by the DKP, go "yeah, early political influence, let's!!" -? Especially considering the fact that they are being watched by the feds because they are considered extremists?


This is what I found on a German news website: The party was handing out Schultüten with marketing shit at several elementary schools. What sort of principal lets a political group into the school to influence their six-year-olds?



e: other than the pen, they apparenty also got a pin button saying something promoting vacations for children (I assume summer camp) in the GDR. The party basically said, well, we had them in a box somewhere.

grmblfjx wrote:

But that's exactly my point! Who would, approached by the DKP, go "yeah, early political influence, let's!!" -? Especially considering the fact that they are being watched by the feds because they are considered extremists?

This is what I found on a German news website: The party was handing out Schultüten with marketing shit at several elementary schools. What sort of principal lets a political group into the school to influence their six-year-olds?

e: other than the pen, they apparenty also got a pin button saying something promoting vacations for children (I assume summer camp) in the GDR. The party basically said, well, we had them in a box somewhere.

Okay, that is WAY more bizarre than the pen gaffe, I completely agree with you there. (I wasn't aware of the DKP being on the watch list - I don't think they were around too prominently before I left Germany). What's next? The NPD or DVU organizing graduation ceremonies or offering official tutoring services? Trust some newswriters to concentrate on TEH BOOBIES and completely miss the far more disturbing implications.

But damn, I kinda want one of those buttons; if worn ironically, they'd make for an interesting accessory (not that the kiddies would know how to do so)

I find this strangely related.

Also funny.


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Saleha wrote:

... you know, I did not even comment on the Nazi joke. Yeah, Badger, good job on actually being offensive. That's about the worst thing you can call a contemporary German and goes completely counter to who ACTUALLY gave them the stuff.

I'm pretty sure that byline was tongue-in-cheek humor.

Quote :

I know this is meant to be flippantly, but really, do you go around calling, say, French people "frog-eating surrender monkeys" etc? This is Mikey's M.O. right there, and he's trolling 90% of the time.

Maybe I'm not up-to-date with my offensive national stereotypes but isn't it 'cheese-eating surrender monkeys'?

It is, Aggie. It was something Groundskeeper Willie said in an episode of The Simpsons in 1995, and when US-French relations soured a few years later, the line rose to prominence without its context. Commentators took it to be a serious expression of Americans' attitudes toward the French, ignoring the fact that it was said in a cartoon by a character who was Scottish (and who regularly said similar things about Americans). Americans, of course, ran with it.

Aggie wrote:

Saleha wrote:

... you know, I did not even comment on the Nazi joke. Yeah, Badger, good job on actually being offensive. That's about the worst thing you can call a contemporary German and goes completely counter to who ACTUALLY gave them the stuff.

I'm pretty sure that byline was tongue-in-cheek humor.

Except it's offensive, nonsensical (the Nazis hated the Communists and happily put them into the concentration camps), and not actually funny. It's calling German people Nazis for no other reason than that they're German.

Malganis wrote:

Aggie wrote:

Saleha wrote:

... you know, I did not even comment on the Nazi joke. Yeah, Badger, good job on actually being offensive. That's about the worst thing you can call a contemporary German and goes completely counter to who ACTUALLY gave them the stuff.

I'm pretty sure that byline was tongue-in-cheek humor.

Except it's offensive, nonsensical (the Nazis hated the Communists and happily put them into the concentration camps), and not actually funny. It's calling German people Nazis for no other reason than that they're German.

Yeah, I was pretty shocked at that one, too. A bit confused, too. It's like a riff on this stereotype of "all Germans are Nazis" when no such stereotype exists. So, yeah, color me weirded out.

grmblfjx wrote:

other than the pen, they apparenty also got a pin button saying something promoting vacations for children (I assume summer camp) in the GDR. The party basically said, well, we had them in a box somewhere.

Well, it's deliciously retro. It could be a fashion statement? A bit like wearing a Mao suit or a Nehru jacket.

Aggie wrote:

Quote :

I know this is meant to be flippantly, but really, do you go around calling, say, French people "frog-eating surrender monkeys" etc? This is Mikey's M.O. right there, and he's trolling 90% of the time.

Maybe I'm not up-to-date with my offensive national stereotypes but isn't it 'cheese-eating surrender monkeys'?

Bah, we eat cheese, frogs and snails, not to forget horses, live oysters...

KelinciHutan wrote:

Yeah, I was pretty shocked at that one, too. A bit confused, too. It's like a riff on this stereotype of "all Germans are Nazis" when no such stereotype exists. So, yeah, color me weirded out.

I think that the stereotype exists (or existed) amongst older people (on the special features and/or commentary for the film Legend, someone at Universal Studios objected to actor David Bennent voicing Gump because they thought he sounded like a "Nazi" due to his accent -- actually, he's Swiss). Not sure how many younger people embrace it.

Also, the plural of "Nazis" is "Nazis". Not "Nazi's", which is the singular possessive.

Oh, the stereotype definitely still exists. Most of us know "Schadenfreude" from Avenue Q, and it pops up in there.

'Schadenfreude' wrote:

Nicky: "Oh, schadenfreude, huh? What- what's that, some kind of Nazi word?"
Gary: "Yep! It's German for happiness at the misfortune of others."
Nicky: "Happiness at the misfortune of others? That is German!"*

Until today, I couldn't figure out what everyone was referring to; on the "View posts since last visit" page, subtitles don't appear. I was tearing apart RB's post and the AP article trying to figure out where the heck this Nazi reference was. But I've found it now.




*[Transcribed by me from the soundtrack CD.]

And that's my cue to post this:

Aggie wrote:

Quote :

I know this is meant to be flippantly, but really, do you go around calling, say, French people "frog-eating surrender monkeys" etc? This is Mikey's M.O. right there, and he's trolling 90% of the time.

Maybe I'm not up-to-date with my offensive national stereotypes but isn't it 'cheese-eating surrender monkeys'?

Yes, and I was about to comment on this before noticing you had already done so. Blast.

Aggie wrote:

Maybe I'm not up-to-date with my offensive national stereotypes but isn't it 'cheese-eating--

The Dutch?
Or is that just a European stereotype?


lmao this thread

No, it's specifically French.

Jeez. You end up in the hospital for a week, nearly bleed to death, and come back to discover everyone's decided you're a racist.

The above is not a joke, BTW.

I will admit I misspoke. I wasn't even aware Germany HAD a Communist Party . Nazi was the wrong word to use, and you could blame it on my age (or the fact that I secretly hate all of mankind), but it was a mistake plain and simple.

And that's all I have to say on the subject. I've spent the last six days being poked, proded, had six units of blood transfused, underwent TWO colonoscopies (the first prep didn't take) and an endoscopy, and no longer have any viable veins in either arm (my IV infiltrated three times, and probably would've infiltrated again, if they hadn't let me go). I feel like shit, my sleep patterns are messed up all to hell, the stupid doctor took me off half my medication without offering me an adequate explanation why, and God alone knows how long it's going to be before I can eat normally again.

So yes, I said Nazi. It was the wrong word, and I apologize. Now for chrissakes go find something better to do with your time than rehashing something that's well over a week old! I'm going to bed.

Well. That was kind of half-assed. :/

Rabid Badger wrote:

I've spent the last six days being poked, proded, had six units of blood transfused, underwent TWO colonoscopies (the first prep didn't take) and an endoscopy, and no longer have any viable veins in either arm (my IV infiltrated three times, and probably would've infiltrated again, if they hadn't let me go). I feel like shit, my sleep patterns are messed up all to hell, the stupid doctor took me off half my medication without offering me an adequate explanation why, and God alone knows how long it's going to be before I can eat normally again.

Wow. That's awful. I hope you feel better soon.