Black Mesa Disaster: lots of ejaculating acid. NSFW

Ello everyone, I mostly lurk. But having read some of ComicsNix there's really just too much good stuff for it to just be un-snarked. So bear with me. >_>

The story I'll be doing today is a Half Life fic entitled 'Black Mesa Disaster', starring for the most part an unfortunate but crafty fellow by the name of John Nalicious. The tragic hero of our generation.

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Barney Calhoun's frind John Nalicious was patrolling Black Mesa's
Scientific lab when it all happened. Monster invaded the complex and
started to eat all of his colleagues. John didn't know what to do,
'cause he was just a guard and had no training battling aliens.

Oh noes. Barney and his frind proceed to fight their way through Black Mesa, before a terrible incident separates the two.

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Them John walked on a elevator but when Barney were coming in, it
started to movu upwards.

"BARNEY!!!!"

"JOHN!!! BE calm, will catch you up thre"

John didn't knew but monsters activated the elevator to eat him.

Barney is caught up by monsters, leaving John no choice but to make a daring escape, shooting through the thick metal floor of the elevator with his presumably 9mm peashooter.

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"Ahhhh, they gonna kill, I must do something!!" cried John. He look to
the ground of the elevator and started to shoot his gun, opening a hole.
"This is my escapeway!!!" so John entered the hole. But there was
nowhere to jump, only the elevator shaft.

"GGRRRUUHHAAAAAAA!!!!!!!" the monster entered and started to smell his
scent. "What I'm going to do?". The monster them followed the smell. It
was an alien slave. John saw his foot when it passed over the hole.
"It's my time!!" he grabbed the moster foot and pulled him on the hole

"UAAAARRRRGHHHHHH!!!!!" and John threw him on the hole, to his final
fate. "I'm saved."

Take that, you alien slave! [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

Unfortunately, John's troubles are only just beginning.

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but when John got out of the hole, a headcrabb was there, and it jumped
on his face "UUNNNNPPPHHHHH!!!" The headcrabb started to eat his nose,
ejacullating acid on his eyes melting them in a mixture of blood, pus
and rotten acid liquid. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH my eyes, I can't
see!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" The john picked his gun and shoot the headcrabb on
the head. "BAM!!!!"

This does raise the interesting question of where else you are able to shoot a headcrab. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

So, he's now blind and in extreme pain, stumbling alone throughout Black Mesa during the Resonance Cascade. How could things get any worse, right?

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He them started to touch the walls to guide himself thru the complex. He
had no eyes anymore. But he was down on his luck, a barnacle was well
over him and it's tongue caught John. "What's this crap?!!?" john
started to shoot in every direction, but only when the barnacle caught
his leg he knew where it was. Whit his leg on the barnacles mouth, John
stated to fire his gun on it. The monster expeled toxic wate thru the
bullet holes, and they caught on johns hair. "MY HAIR MY GOD I'm
BALDING!!!" the John shoot the thing for good and felt on the grond. The
barnacle had eaten his left leg, but luckly, his gastric juices
stanched the blood loss.

Man, this is not John's lucky day at all. But, it manages to get even worse when he discovers a horrifying new fact about the zombies that was not depicted in the games.

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John them started to drag himself, not knowing what was before him. He
lost much bllod but he was strong, very strong. "What should I do?" John
thought not know the zombie walking on his way. The Zombie started to
pull its pants of, and his rotten penis was hangin' on his pelvis like a
dead crow's corpse. The zombie them managed to pull his meber on John's
ass. "AHHHH, MY BUTT!!!" John tried to fire, but had no more bullets.
The zombie went on with his evil intent, juggling his dead rod inside's
John now rolled up ass. Blood was sprailling al over the zombie rotten
body, but John didn't knew that it was a zombie driling him. "Is it you
Barney?" no response, but John tried to free himself from the monster
shaking his body and his butt. That didn't quite work, because the
monster got more excitted. After ten minuter of thrusting the moster
reached his climax and them, ejaculated inside John.

"AHHHHHHHHH, my fucking ASS!!!" the cum inside John was pure cautic
acid, and it started to consume him inside out, destroing his internal
organs.

[You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

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But John was lucky that day

[You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

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because the monster was too exausted and satisfied it fell dead aover
John. This monster's cum isn't something normal because it's elastic. If
he lived the cum would glue itself inside john and the two were
destined to be glued forever. But the monster died with a lot of
contractions on his penis, this caused the cum to turn back inseide the
zombie's body.

Hear that, guys? It's the good thing this horny zombie died of exhaustion, or they would have been glued together forever, inside of John's now thoroughly scalded rectum. What a loss, he could have taken this trip on a journey to discover the joys and sorrows of love, as the two vitriolic companions slowly warm to one another before they realize just how destined their love truly was! [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

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John had no eyes, no leg, and no rectum anymore, but he managed to
continue on his jorney towards salvation. The problem was that he
coudln't keep his feces inside his body anymore, so they started to let
and trail of shit where John has passed. He knew it was dangerous, but
he wouldnt letany monsters track him.

How he prevents the monsters from tracking his trail of feces (which you'd think would run out after a short distance) is not explained. I don't let it get to me though, because John proves himself to be very resourceful in the upcoming few scenes.

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John was dragging himself when he heard a sound. "It's people!" he went
to help them. Them, the people started to scream "Oh my god, the zombies
are rapping everyone!!" cried a scientist.

Oh my god, the zombies are rapping, everyone!



Anyway. The scientist is then penetrated anally by a headcrab, who eats his way up through to his mouth. Predictably he does not survive.

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John started to move faster and faster, but it was too late, everyone of
the three hundread scientist hidding were rapped to death by the
zombies. All of the zombies died, noted John. "Apparently they are weak
against human's ass." John had an idea. He must find enough asses, so
the monsters eat them all and die from extreme pleasure. But where he
could find a lot of asses?

It's okay, John. I don't think anyone would blame you for not being able to help here.

But I do have two questions. First, if three hundred able bodied scientists are unable to hide from the zombies, how is a blind, one legged man with most of his innards dissolved able to move without being eaten? Second, how the hell is John able to tell that all the zombies are dying after ass-raping the scientists? [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

Oh well. A man on a mission, John heroically carries on.

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He them remembered a machine they were testing at a lab. He went there
fighting monster allong the way. He got better at fighting, knowing
where to shoot the monster right into the weak spot.

How? [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

Regardless, John makes it to the machine, and orders it to make two million copies of himself. The monsters break through the doors to the lab, but are intercepted by two million naked Johns. Carnage ensues.

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The monsters liked, and started making out with the Johns. The were all
nude, because the machine only copied organic matter. But it doesn't
matter, it worked. All the monsters started to die in pleasure and lust,
and the johns too. But John knew he saved Black Mesa, because he had a
physics degree, and his calculus were exact.

John the Security Guard has a physics degree, everyone. Not only that, but in his blind one-legged badly scalded form he manages to perform calculus; to what end, I'm not sure, as the story never states what he needs calculus for, but he did it, god damn it.

[You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

Then, Barney enters! Together with his frind again at last, the two share a heartfelt reunion.

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"John, you're alive!!! Thank God"

"You're late Barney, I almost died!"

"Oh my god John a headcrab got you, don't it?"

"Yes but, why's that"

Barney shoot him in the head and killed John before he could turn into a
zombie.

After saving Black Mesa, that's the thanks poor John receives. His best frind shoots him despite the fact that the headcrab needs to actually be alive and on your head to turn you into one. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

At least the story ends on a humorous note!

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But Barney knew he woudln't be arrest, there was a clone john left.

"Hey cloned John, wanna a job?"

"What kind partner?"

"Security guard"

"Well, this place is a mess. Okay, the janitors that are going to clean
everything, don't they?"

"Yeah John, ha ha ha, you was born with a good sense of humor, just
like John."

Them, they all lived happily ever after. Clone John got a job, Barney got a promotion, and Black Mesa cleaned the
mess. The other suriving Johns got janitor jobs, but they were happy,
they have clothes now.

Barney, you asshole.

Well, there you have it guys. Black Mesa Disaster, by ComicsNix. *clap*

If someone wants another story to snark that in my opinion is even funnier, check out 'Scooby Doo and the Trip of Lust'.

Thanks for reading.

I took a look at TvTropes' page for The Wolf Blood Lineage

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