Republican party discover internet is full of crazy people

The Republican party want your opinions. So much that they set up a website letting any old weirdo post policy suggestions. Some of them are very special:

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"End Child Labor Laws," suggests one helpful participant. "We coddle children too much. They need to spend their youth in the factories."

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"A 'teacher' told my child in class that dolphins were mammals and not fish!" a third complains. "And the same thing about whales! We need TRADITIONAL VALUES in all areas of education. If it swims in the water, it is a FISH. Period! End of Story."

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"English is are official langauge. Anybody who ain't speak it the RIGHT way should kicked out."

Of course, this isn't the only social media failure for a party. Here is the hilarious story of the Conservative party's attempt to engage with Twitter

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But instead it rapidly turned to embarrassment for the Tory party after it was revealed that the site's template came from a rightwing American group that opposes President Barack Obama's cap-and-trade system – and then became the target of a mass Twitter hack that led to it showing pornography, swearwords, Rick Astley videos, malware links, and redirecting visitors to the Labour party site.

ZoZo wrote:

The Republican party want your opinions. So much that they set up a website letting any old weirdo post policy suggestions. Some of them are very special:

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"End Child Labor Laws," suggests one helpful participant. "We coddle children too much. They need to spend their youth in the factories."

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"A 'teacher' told my child in class that dolphins were mammals and not fish!" a third complains. "And the same thing about whales! We need TRADITIONAL VALUES in all areas of education. If it swims in the water, it is a FISH. Period! End of Story."

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"English is are official langauge. Anybody who ain't speak it the RIGHT way should kicked out."

Those comments just scream

Welcome to the internet, mundane peoploids!
Enjoy your stay!

Unfortunately unless they're rather blatant it's hard to know which messages are trolls and which aren't given the kind of insane ideas some people have. For example someone suggested making all Muslims in the US wear ankle monitors so the government would know where all the "terrorists" are. I'd suspect a suggestion like that is what someone really thinks.

tim gueguen wrote:

I'd suspect a suggestion like that is what someone really thinks.

Which makes "Republicans discover internet is full of crazies" all the more true.

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House Republicans, meet the World Wide Web.

[You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

tim gueguen wrote:

Unfortunately unless they're rather blatant it's hard to know which messages are trolls and which aren't given the kind of insane ideas some people have. For example someone suggested making all Muslims in the US wear ankle monitors so the government would know where all the "terrorists" are. I'd suspect a suggestion like that is what someone really thinks.

Poe's Law, in other words. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

So um, essentially, they found the Tea Party?

If looking at the comments section of my local news site has taught me anything, it's that there's always going to be at least a handful of crazies that have "trollish" ideals. Fuck you Tim James, fuck you.

I sit on the Internet 14 hours a day and there's nothing wrong with me...

Well, it's always four o'clock (in the morning) and the butter's being spread with the bread-knife, but seriously, who could ever think the Netwocky would put up with crazy people?

Trioculus wrote:

tim gueguen wrote:

Unfortunately unless they're rather blatant it's hard to know which messages are trolls and which aren't given the kind of insane ideas some people have. For example someone suggested making all Muslims in the US wear ankle monitors so the government would know where all the "terrorists" are. I'd suspect a suggestion like that is what someone really thinks.

Poe's Law, in other words. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

In fact some of the posts I saw were attributed to a contributor named Poe.

As I said before, when you cannot tell the "true believers" from the parody trolls on a site like that...you have a problem.

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"End Child Labor Laws," suggests one helpful participant. "We coddle children too much. They need to spend their youth in the factories."

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"A 'teacher' told my child in class that dolphins were mammals and not fish!" a third complains. "And the same thing about whales! We need TRADITIONAL VALUES in all areas of education. If it swims in the water, it is a FISH. Period! End of Story."

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"English is are official langauge. Anybody who ain't speak it the RIGHT way should kicked out."

Ahahahaha those are fucking brilliant

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"A 'teacher' told my child in class that dolphins were mammals and not fish!" a third complains. "And the same thing about whales! We need TRADITIONAL VALUES in all areas of education. If it swims in the water, it is a FISH. Period! End of Story."

The cephalopods called. They want you to take that back or they'll unleash the tentacles. I'd comply if I were you. (And then there's crustaceans, seahorses, and probably other things I'm forgetting.)

Keith Fraser wrote:

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"A 'teacher' told my child in class that dolphins were mammals and not fish!" a third complains. "And the same thing about whales! We need TRADITIONAL VALUES in all areas of education. If it swims in the water, it is a FISH. Period! End of Story."

The cephalopods called. They want you to take that back or they'll unleash the tentacles. I'd comply if I were you. (And then there's crustaceans, seahorses, and probably other things I'm forgetting.)

Seahorses are fish, as members of the class Actinopterygii, which are bony fish.

This...

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Build a wall along our borders. Not a wimpy fence. China did it and the toursim dollars the wall brings in will more than pay for the cost. I'm thinking a 1000 feet high and a 100 feet or more thick. A man made mountain range. That'll keep people out! P.S. Canadians are a bigger threat to our security than we realize. Did you realize the late Peter Jennings' Canadian, yet hosted an American news program? They can blend in unnoticed into our society and our border with them is totally demilitarized!!! They can just sneak across and pretend to be Americans, with their stinkin' European-wannabe socialism. P.P.S. Maybe anchor some mines along our coastal waterways so no one sneaks in on boats.

This is fantastic.

Edit: Wow. On the first 'American Values' page, all the ideas were progressive, except one which was voted down. Is this... could this possibly be... my faith in humanity being restored?

(Hahah, nah.)

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P.S. Canadians are a bigger threat to our security than we realize.

Take that back, or Dr Rodney McKay is going to unleash atomic bombs on your heads.


(ps: McKay is a character from Stargate Atlantis, and he's Canadian. He's also said to have built an atomic bomb at the age of ten, for a science fair.)

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Keith Fraser wrote:
"A 'teacher' told my child in class that dolphins were mammals and not fish!" a third complains. "And the same thing about whales! We need TRADITIONAL VALUES in all areas of education. If it swims in the water, it is a FISH. Period! End of Story."

But if it gives birth to live young, it's a mammal. So either God screwed up somewhere along the line, or some mammals are capable of swimming.

I can see this person's head exploding at the mere thought.

Rabid Badger wrote:

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Keith Fraser wrote:
"A 'teacher' told my child in class that dolphins were mammals and not fish!" a third complains. "And the same thing about whales! We need TRADITIONAL VALUES in all areas of education. If it swims in the water, it is a FISH. Period! End of Story."

But if it gives birth to live young, it's a mammal. So either God screwed up somewhere along the line, or some mammals are capable of swimming.

I can see this person's head exploding at the mere thought.

There are several non-mammal species that give birth to live young, including many varieties of fish. And some mammals don't give birth to live young, and instead lay eggs (monotremes).

Rabid Badger wrote:

I can see this person's head exploding at the mere thought.

I can see this person's head exploding at any thought.

That said... I wonder how many of the Poe's Law level posts will be adopted by GOP. English as the official language of the US is something that keeps popping up every few years. Fortress America (at least along the Mexican border) is another idea that keeps coming back. A sufficiently desperate GOP could adopt those ideas or worse if they think it's what is required to win, regardless of the actual results.

Why do I feel Rules 1&2 is behind this? I approve though, this is amusing.

I bet the GOP is going to de-emphasize the role this site should play, and quietly pull the plug about three months from now after everyone's forgotten about it.

Any takers?

Adagio wrote:

Edit: Wow. On the first 'American Values' page, all the ideas were progressive, except one which was voted down. Is this... could this possibly be... my faith in humanity being restored?

More like the population of the internet generally leans liberal.

Rabid Badger wrote:

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Keith Fraser wrote:
"A 'teacher' told my child in class that dolphins were mammals and not fish!" a third complains. "And the same thing about whales! We need TRADITIONAL VALUES in all areas of education. If it swims in the water, it is a FISH. Period! End of Story."

But if it gives birth to live young, it's a mammal. So either God screwed up somewhere along the line, or some mammals are capable of swimming.

I can see this person's head exploding at the mere thought.

also you forgot to take seals and otters into account come on badge you're losing your touch

TheHermit wrote:

I bet the GOP is going to de-emphasize the role this site should play, and quietly pull the plug about three months from now after everyone's forgotten about it.

Didn't even take that long.

“This is not a political party in search of a keel or in search of principles. It’s not a listening tour. House Republicans know what we believe. House Republicans know that the American people know better than elected officials and politicians about what putting those principles into practice really looks like.” - Rep. Mike Pence (R-IN), the same day the website launched.

In other words, they will listen to ideas so long as those ideas are ones they already have.

Rabid Badger wrote:

But if it gives birth to live young, it's a mammal.

No, if its young feed on milk produced by their mother, it's a mammal. The monotremes aren't quite extinct yet.

I'm a pretty good swimmer, am I a FISH too? Question mark! I am open to answers.

EDIT: Seriously I can't stop giggling at

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"If it swims in the water, it is a FISH. Period! End of Story."

because what if it swims in like, jello? Does that make it INCREDIBLY HAPPY? Because I'd be INCREDIBLY HAPPY that I was swimming in jello.