CSI: Mpreg

Now, CSI is quite a superficially realistic fandom. I expect the author will have an author's not explaining the scientific rigour than has gone into this idea and the events leading up to her inspiration.

Quote :

Author’s Notes. This is a take off from Caged. Where Nick and Greg were
talking about Ricins. Or whatever. What if Nick did have something but it
wasn’t Ricins.

Well, thanks for clearing that up.

Quote :

But he smiled that wasn’t such a bad thing. He’d get to see his lover some
today. Nick smiled and headed to the DNA lab. Greg was listening to his music
loud. Nick smirked and came up behind him and slipped his arms around his
waist.

Spooky read the fanfic and typed on the keyboard. The writer strung together
things that didn’t work they probably should have been separate sentences.
Spooky was reading the most boring narrative she’d read for quite some time.

Quote :

Nick smiled. “It better be the only
guy you leave in Bed. Whatcha got for me?” Nick asked stepping back.

I’m liking the capitalisation of Bed. It makes me think there is like a city
called Bed where everyone goes when they go to Bed.

Quote :

Greg smiled. “The stuff you brought me earlier. Is well let’s just say not
found in common things.” Greg said. Nick nodded and looked at the file. Greg
pulled the see through board over and starting drawing.

“ See everyone thought I got this job by sleeping with Catherine.” Greg said
turning and looking at Nick.

Well, I didn’t think that, but it is kind of suspicious when you bring it up
out of the blue like that.

“So, I got the DNA samples you –“

“I did not kill two hookers and use their disembodied heads as slippers, and
I wish everyone would stop saying that!”

Hmm…

Quote :

Nick was at his and Greg’s house laying on the bed when Greg came in 3 hours
after his shift was supposed to end. In that time Nick had been throwing up not
knowing why.

Could have been the poison. Could definitely have been the poison.

.

Quote :

Nick nodded. “Just having problems with my stomach.”

Because of the POISON?

Quote :

Nick nodded. “Yes mother.” Nick said sarcastically.

I’m glad you added that ‘sarcastically’ because otherwise I would have been
like ‘What? This is AU incest genderswap MPREG?’

I just cursed that into existence, didn’t I?

Quote :

“Hello Mr. Stokes. I’m Doctor Cantwell.” The doctor was about 50 years old.
Had nice methodic voice.

I have a nice methodic voice.

Quote :

The doctor nodded. ‘Ok. Lie back on the table and let’s have a look.” The
doctor said. The doctor performed several tests with his hands and when he went
to mash into Nick’s stomach Nick groaned.

Stomach mashing is a test now? How do you mash someone’s stomach anyway? And
does it taste good with bangers?

Quote :

Nick looked at him wide eyed. “T that ain’t possible.” Nick said in shock.

No Nick. I it ain’t.

Quote :

Doctor nodded. “It is. But it is rare. See some men have a small uterus.
Most men don’t have it. And it’s undetectable without the right tests.

STUPIDEST. EXPLANATION FOR MPREG. EVER.

Quote :

I need Reviews to continue.

Author needs food badly.

So, there's like another 20 chapters of this. Anyone?

Quote :

“Hello Mr. Stokes. I’m Doctor Cantwell.” The doctor was about 50 years old.
Had nice methodic voice.

The Methodist voice is so renowned that a whole new adjective has been created to describe its qualities.

Spooky wrote:

So, there's like another 20 chapters of this. Anyone?

Link?

Did I miss the link?

Sounds like this story is...
Getting heavy.

That's almost becoming a tradition for me.. here ya go.

[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.]

Quote :

“I did some testing and found out that Nick is pregnant.” The doctor said.
Greg nodded. “Ok.” Greg said.

This is what bothers me about most mpreg fics. Everyone is so blase about it.

Quote :

“Like I told Nick. Some men are born with a little uterus. And it’s never used cause the women can’t fertilize the eggs.”

Unless you're Paul McCartney.

Wouldn't the presence of a uterus, even a small one, combined with a penis makes the person a hermeaphrodite?

Further, wouldn't the female genitalia reveal themselves at menses?
How did the sperm get to the uterus? An Colongina would be impossible to keep clean, and I'm pretty sure the penis couldn't "suck up" sperm.

God, I hate MPreg.
Maybe if they used an artifical womb, I wouldn't hate it so much. They could still make it a surprise by having one set it up without the others knowledge, and explain symptoms (aside from engorgement) as Couvade Syndrome (which I found through 5 minutes on Wikipedia.)

unskilled78 wrote:

Wouldn't the presence of a uterus, even a small one, combined with a penis makes the person a hermeaphrodite?[=/quote]

It would make them a hermaphrodite, yes; but it wouldn't necessarily be readily obvious. A baby's sex is judged by its outside genitalia, and if it were born with a seemingly normal penis and testes, they'd assume it was a boy.

Quote :

Further, wouldn't the female genitalia reveal themselves at menses?

Depends on whether or not it was functional enough to release eggs. Remember the South African woman racer whose outside genitalia were female, but who was found to have a rudimentary penis and testicles in her abdomen, as well as a uterus that wasn't attached to anything? She never had periods, but since her family was relatively poor, they didn't have the money to take her to a doctor to find out why.

Quote :

How did the sperm get to the uterus? An Colongina would be impossible to keep clean, and I'm pretty sure the penis couldn't "suck up" sperm.

In the case of the south African women, it wouldn't. While she had visible external female genitalia, it turned out her vagina ended in a blind pouch, and there's no connection between it and her uterus. Also, she had no ovaries

In the case of a guy who was outwardly a guy, but had a small vagina with ovaries that did ovulate, and the vagina was connected to the colon, the problem would become obvious when he hit puberty and started bleeding from his colon every month. At which point, I think that the doctor would remove the uterus for the sake of safety.

I found the Wikipedia article fascinating, BTW. I'd heard of 'sympathy pains,' but I'd never realized men would go so far as to actually gain weight and have cravings.

@Rabid: I was refering to this case in particular, not to dual-gendered people IRL.

I find it sad that nowhere in this fic does anybody work in the dark in montage format to find out what's wrong. Isn't that what CSIs do?

ZoZo wrote:

I find it sad that nowhere in this fic does anybody work in the dark in montage format to find out what's wrong. Isn't that what CSIs do?

Are you kidding? Don't you know that "work" is just code for "a place to hook up and then pine for your love".

Sheesh...gotta teach you everything these days. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]