German Speakers

For my German oral final, my partner and I are making a mockumentary about a band splitting up. In one scene, we are going to get into a big argument and begin insulting each other. Are there any equivalents of US kids insults like, "You big meanie head," or "You dummy," or anything like that? Basically I'm looking for insults that are so light that it's ridiculous for adults to be using them.

Hm, I can't come up with much, childhood's been a while and honestly? Since swearing isn't regarded as "ZOMG the humanity!11" as it is in the US, our kids do use some pretty heavy caliber cuss words relatively young. I once walked by the kindergarten in my home town and had the kids scream things at me that made me blush.

BUT, here are some harmless and rather ridiculous sounding insults that most adults wouldn't use.

"Doofmann" - literally "stupid man", but can be used for both genders.

"Blödian" - "dummy"

That is literally all I can come up with. When I was six, I called people I disliked "asshole"

Doofmann and Blödian are perfect.

Are animal-insults much done there? When I was a kid, we'd call each other things like stupid cow and dog-face.

The only insult I remember being taught in German class was Dumme Kuh, literally stupid cow.

E-mail Bikini Zebra at [You must be registered and logged in to see this link.] for help, she's really good with German and has a dictionary with really good phrases.