Kjos Ministries

Welcome to Kjos Ministries, the online catalog of the stupidity and paranoia of one elderly woman. Berit Kjos is a hyperconservative Christian columnist who considers herself a "humble servant of God" who has been called specifically by the Deity to expose all the schemes that the 'liberals' are trying to perpetrate on the world. Except to her, a 'liberal' is anyone who does not believe in the absolute Truth of the Bible* and share a far-right political view. John McCain? He's a liberal. C.S. Lewis? He's a liberal and a pagan. JK Rowling? Nobody's farther to the left than her, given that she is, of course, a hardcore Witch trying to set Harry Potter up as a false Messiah. Allegory? What the hell's an allegory?

I've thought about mentioning this here for a long time, but I came across something today that utterly blew my mind: this lady is totally oblivious to the point of Huxley's Brave New World? She actually believes that Huxley was arguing for the type of society we see in the novel. She thinks that it's what he wanted. Kjos has no idea what fiction is and what it's supposed to do, or that 'Myth' can mean something besides 'a story that isn't true'.

Ever heard of the novel The Giver? It's a wonderful piece of adolescent literature about the dangers of rampant statism. You'd be hard pressed to find a better novel with a more straightforward conservative message. Kjos thinks it's a scheme by liberals to get your children to consider the 'unthinkables'--euthenasia and infanticide and thus 'desensitize' them to the idea. Despite the fact that the author is clearly portraying these things as monstrous.

*This Truth, is of course, never metaphorical or hyperbolic, but always one-hundred percent literal. Except when it says to love your neighbor, then it's okay to ignore that in the name of all the other Truth.

Oyyy, Kjos. I've tried several times to contact either her or 'Peter' (the alleged ex-sorcerer who supposedly provides them with HARCORE TRUTH ABOUT REAL OCCULTISTS AND HOW THEY RECRUIT KIDS INTO DEMON-POSSESSED OCCULTISM VIA WORLD OF WARCRACK), and surprise, surprise, gotten NO reply.

I've always wondered why this is, as my emails are polite, friendly, never question 'Peter's' supposed experiences, and are from a fellow Christian who simply has some questions about some of Peter's interpretations of the Bible.

Same here. I've sent an email pointing out that they're pretty much idolizing the Bible instead of honoring God and another one pointing out that the passages in Deuteronomy and Exodus that forbids 'witchcraft' are talking about specific occult practices that have nothing to do with Harry Potter style fantasy magic, which never has existed and never will. No response whatsoever, even to tell me how wrong I am.

Chaltab wrote:

Same here. ... No response whatsoever, even to tell me how wrong I am.

Isn't that weird, though? Just from reading their letters section and the "Ask Peter" section, you'd think that they'd take up the opportunity to respond to someone disagreeing with them, since they do it so frequently. Peter even wrote several TL;DR responses to an HP fan who was barely capable of spelling anything if it didn't have a netspeak abbreviation. :suspect:

Chaltab wrote:

*This Truth, is of course, never metaphorical or hyperbolic, but always one-hundred percent literal. Except when it says to love your neighbor, then it's okay to ignore that in the name of all the other Truth.

No, no, you're doing it wrong. She loves all these liberal scum with all her heart and wants to save them from their folly by bringing them to the light of Jesus. It's called "tough love," and sometimes you have to do it with letter bombs.

Quote :

There IS a world of magic out there that most Christian 13 year old girls know NOTHING about NOR SHOULD THEY.

So these people think magic is all real ... and they call us delusional?

I've always wondered how they reconcile the innumerable conflicting systems of magic throughout fantasy literature. The magic of Harry Potter, Chronicles of Narnia, and the Valdemar books, just as a random sample, have virtually nothing in common aside from being called "magic".

What I find particularly telling is the absolute shallowness of the knowledge of this "expert" and "insider". For instance, he says:

Quote :

Runes are what witches use to guide their decision making.

One has to assume from that statement that all he knows of runes is from the popular runic divination kits available in shops. If he really had the esoteric background he claims, he would know that runes were also believed to have magical power and could be used for spellcasting, not just for divination. He comes across to me as a showman bamboozling the rubes, making up his patter as he goes along. It works just great until someone who actually knows what he's talking about comes along and queers his pitch.

Also ... he claims to be, or have been, a Third Order master in the Golden Dawn ... don't you have to be dead for that?

DVFH, CTA MIRV

That Peter guy sure loves to mention how he KNOWS about the occult since he practiced it all the time for 30 years, so he's an EXPERT, dammit! It certainly is convenient that he never has to explain what he knows and how, since then he'd be passing the information on to susceptible 13-year-old girls, much like J.K. Rowling is with the Harry Potter books.

Wandering Critic wrote:

He comes across to me as a showman bamboozling the rubes, making up his patter as he goes along. It works just great until someone who actually knows what he's talking about comes along and queers his pitch.

Please, please do.

DeeDee wrote:

It certainly is convenient that he never has to
explain what he knows and how, since then he'd be passing the
information on to susceptible 13-year-old girls, much like J.K. Rowling
is with the Harry Potter books.

Except in a far less entertaining way than Rowling, don't forget.

I just find his assertation that playing video games is a preparation for RL spellcasting to be hilarious. Ditto for the claim that occultists target gamers, ala the aliens and their Space Invaders-type game in The Last Starfighter.

Wandering Critic wrote:

Quote :

Runes are what witches use to guide their decision making.

One has to assume from that statement that all he knows of runes is from the popular runic divination kits available in shops. If he really had the esoteric background he claims, he would know that runes were also believed to have magical power and could be used for spellcasting, not just for divination.

Heck, you can learn that from playing a video game. Of course video games area also evil, so that explains why nobody there is actually familiar with them.

Kjos' bizarre interpretation of Lord of the Rings has always made me want to scream with frustration.

Quote :

Since Tolkien denies any supposed allegorical
link between his myth and Biblical truth, it's not fair to hold his stories
accountable to that truth. Nor is it wise to continue claiming that they teach
us God's truth. Those who do could easily be tempted to lower their guard, set
aside discernment, internalize the fascinating suggestions and be drawn to
occult images -- the opposite of God's warning in Romans 12:9:
"Abhor what is evil. Cling to what is good."

She seems completely immune to the idea that, while Tolkien's LOTR was not an allegory, it was in a large way inspired by Tolkien's personal and religious morality... specifically Catholic morality. And also, that maybe, just maybe, the guy just wanted to write a really good story.

Quote :

Tolkien's talent as a
storyteller, gives life to this mythical world. He makes sense of the deadly
ambitions of the power-hungry Lord Sauron who serves the evil Melkor.
Therefore, the wizardry we would shun in the real world becomes a welcome
solution in the context of this story ...

Yeah, the next grey-bearded, staff-carrying, firecracker-toting wizard that comes to my doorstep and scratchs a rune on my door, I'm totes telling him to take a hike. 'Specially if he's brought a bunch of dwarves along.

SHUUUUUN, SHUUUUN THE WIZARDS! :redangry: