Snap into a Slim Jim? Oh, no...

At least not until September, if not later.

Quote :

Get ready for a summer Slim Jim shortage. The New York Post reports that Slim Jim fans may be hoarding the processed meat product, and it soon could be disappearing from store shelves.

An explosion last month destroyed the only Slim Jim plant in the U.S., the Post reports. And the company that makes Slim Jims, ConAgra (CAG), hasn't produced any since then and won't do so for at least another month.

Industry analysts say that Slim Jim loyalty is very high, and that people aren't going to be OK with substitutes if the real thing is gone. That's why some fans may be hoarding the remaining supply.

Analysts tell the Post that ConAgra could produce as many as 500 million Slim Jims every year. ConAgra said it won't return to full Slim Jim production until the fall.

I have friends this news will send into panic attacks.

Okay, you officially freaked me out. I thought this was going to be an announcement that Macho Man Randy Savage had died. :panic:

Aggie wrote:

Okay, you officially freaked me out. I thought this was going to be an announcement that Macho Man Randy Savage had died. :panic:

Seconded. Too many celebrity deaths on top of each other already.

Slim Jims are nasty shit, so who cares.

Aggie wrote:

Okay, you officially freaked me out. I thought this was going to be an announcement that Macho Man Randy Savage had died. :panic:

I thought it was going to be some kind of horrific RPS foodporn. I cannot tell you how relieved I am to know the truth.

But Oscar Mayer wasn't so lucky.

Mafiosa wrote:

Slim Jims are nasty shit, so who cares.

Seconded. They taste like rat poison.

Nihilist wrote:

But Oscar Mayer wasn't so lucky.

I didn't know A) There was an actual Oscar Meyer or B) the guy that started the company was still around.

I was expecting someone to have bitten a dude's penis off after mistaking it for a Slim Jim while tripping balls.

I'm going to go outside now.

Good idea.

Weirdly, I woke up craving these things yesterday. O.o I should probably go get one. Like NAOW.

Mikey Go WOOGA wrote:

I was expecting someone to have bitten a dude's penis off after mistaking it for a Slim Jim while tripping balls.

I'm going to go outside now.

I'm a little bit ashamed to admit this, but god dammit, I thought the same thing.

I like Slim Jims but I haven't had any in a long time.

Mikey Go WOOGA wrote:

I was expecting someone to have bitten a dude's penis off after mistaking it for a Slim Jim while tripping balls.

I'm going to go outside now.

Good, honey. It sounds like you need some air, stat.

Am I the only one who expected this article to be either about lock picks or marijuana?

I agree Slim Jim's are nasty - they're usually made up of leftover parts.
I've really found only two brands of jerky likable - both of them are made here (and available only here) in Texas. One is Stubb's, and the other is Woody's Smokehouse.

I thought this might be about rocker "Slim" Jim Phantom (of the Stray Cats) dying.

BTW, has anyone here read the nutriion facts on one of those things?

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO I have loved Slim Jims forever DON'T LEAVE ME, DELICIOUS MEAT SNACKS