Robot Harmonian Attack

Last chapter *crosses finger*. Brace yourself, folks: The glurge flows deep and thick from here on in.

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A/N Hey guys! In response to my last note, I'd like to apologize for asking for reviews - it WAS pretty rude of me and I'm very, very, sorry *pouts* thanks for being loyal and getting me reviews anyway!

+1 to Lady of Pale Emerald Fires for that.

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This chapter is a little different and longer than the last - I just thought we need some relief before the gathering storm *wicked grin*

What, you mean the "storm" were The Potter Bunch fights off those evil evil EVIL Weasleys with The Power Of Love™? Whatever, just get to assasinating the character of the entire Weasley clan and get it over with.

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As for the canon whores who just decided to show up...*yawn* Perhaps you should follow the advice of your Patron Goddess and "go back and reread" because you'll find I'm writing the redheads quite in character

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Harry kissed her again and again as they wandered back from the streets, hand in hand – every time he looked at her he caught the way her eyes shone in the darkness, or the way the lamplight glinted off her hair, Harry knew he just had to have her. She, too, would surprise him with her kisses, which pressed against his cheek, his hair, and his lips like the softest of rose petals.

Dialog by the Harlequin Bodicerip'o'matic 5000.

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When they finally arrived home, they took a moment from their amorous intentions to check on the children. First, they went to see Harry's children – for no matter what that Weasley bitch said, they would always be his children

Ginny Weasley - still a fat bitch.

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and saw they were all tucked in, the moonlight shining across their faces and bathing them in a celestial glow. A quick look into the guest bedroom left Hermione nearly in tears; to see Rose and Hugo curled up in their twin beds, smiling gently, the age brought on by years of torment and abuse dropped from their faces…it brought on a swell of unimaginable relief within her breast, and she fell against Harry for support.

OMFG, she swooned! She actually swooned!

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He picked her up and carried her into the master bedroom as a bridegroom would his new bride. And indeed, it was a marriage of sorts. Perhaps not a marriage of legality, where mere words on a piece of paper and a mere shower of sparks would bond one to another, but a marriage of spirit, where that most holy and sacred of acts, performed in love, would meld two kindred souls together into an unbreakable force.

Didn't know they were Catholic #runaway_runaway

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The bedroom itself was sumptuous. Decorated in dark, Gryffindor colors, the bed was made of mahogany, burnished like a throne. Rich red velvet curtains hung from its four posts, while above the charmed engravings of lions and dolphins cavorted across the intricately carved ceiling. Harry noticed that Mary must have sensed what would occur between the two, for she had brought all of Hermione's things to his bedroom.

Um... How rich is Harry supposed to be, anyway?

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Harry placed her gently, tenderly on the bed after leaving one last kiss on her lips. "Hermione," he said softly, gazing lovingly into her chocolate brown eyes. "I know this will sound tremendously old fashioned, but would you prefer it if we waited a bit before…before going through with this?"

*cue Janet Jackson*

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"Why?" Hermione asked, puzzled.

"I…I don't feel ready for it just yet. I've been through so much today, and so have you, and I want to take this one step at a time. We can sleep here together tonight, side by side,

Sleeping chastely...

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but as for that…I simply want to wait."

"You murdering your husband. My wife's seat not being cold before you showed up. Kinda kills the mood, to be honest."

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Hermione, in a voice full of newfound understanding, replied, "Of course we can wait, darling. It's almost like losing your virginity again, isn't it?

Oh... not in the slightest!

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He kissed her one last time, deep and long. "Now if you'll excuse me, Mrs. Potter, I must get ready for bed."

You guys do realize that you can't get married until Ron is officially dead, right? As far as the world knows, she's still Mrs. Ron Weasley? And that correcting that assumption will open up a Hagrid-sized can of worms? You're aware of all this, right?

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The next morning,

The adrenaline rush had long since passed and reality dropkicked Hermione in the face. Her screams could be heard for miles.

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Hermione awoke to the smell of freshly-made French toast and delicious hot coffee. As she went down the stairs and into the dining room, she found Harry sitting at the head of the dining room table, grinning.

"Guess what we did while you were asleep?"

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Lily immediately ran into Hermione, clutching at the skirt of her nightgown, wide eyes looking up in astonishment.

"Don't get any bright ideas. I'm still the Head Bitch In Charge around here!"

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"Is it true you're going to be our mummy now?"

Hermione looked down at her, and felt her eyes mist over in tenderness. "Yes, sweetheart, I will. And I hope I'll be the best mummy I can be."

Lily buried her face in her skirt. "I'm glad! I didn't like my old mummy. She was mean and she didn't like us one bit. She always said we were getting in her way, and we got her fat."

Ginny Weasley: So awful even her kids didn't like her.

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Hermione tried and failed to stifle a laugh. Rose now came up to her.

"Is Mr. Potter going to be our daddy now? Are we going away forever and ever?"

"Mr. Potter?" Not "Uncle Harry?" Sure...

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Rose and Lily rushed back upstairs while Harry continued. "I sent an owl to Gringotts this morning and just got word back from them – they'll have the Black and Potter fortunes moved to their Paris branch by the end of the day.

IIRC, Harry was rich, but not THIS rich, even if you add in Sirius' money (Which couldn't have really been all THAT much considering he was disowned).

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"My only concern right now is you. Forgive me for intruding on your privacy, dearest, but I had a look at the rags in your bag and, well, I can't imagine you walking around in those…things. I'd give you some of Ginny's clothes, but I'm afraid she took them all."

Hermione shook her head. "Even if you had them, I'd never take them. I couldn't imagine walking around in her kind of clothes. I'll just wait until we get to France and I'll buy some new things."

A) Ginny was an awful human being. WE GET IT.
B) "Dearest?" *gags*

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"It's just like a fairy tale!" Lily bubbled happily. "Where the prince comes to rescue the princess and everyone in the kingdom rejoices and they all live happily ever after!"

More like the original Grimms's tales where the villains died horrible deaths, usually at the hands of the "good guys."

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By the time they had finished packing, the Wizarding taxi had arrived to take them all to the wharf. When they arrived, Hermione and the children gasped – waiting to take them to France was a beautiful, forty-meter yacht.

Harry grinned. "Beautiful, isn't it? We're just renting it for the trip, but I could buy it if you want. I'm sure it would make a lovely vessel for cruising up and down the Loire."

*SNIFF SNIFF* Hmm... Smells like wish fulfillment...

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The interior was just as wonderful as Hermione imagined it – soft white carpeting, golden teakwood paneling and furniture, and wide windows on either side looking out into the blue waters of the Atlantic.

Er... Wouldn't taking the English Channel be far FAR faster than going out into the ocean? For that matter, why are they using a (presumably) Muggle ship, a friggin' expensive one to boot, instead of using the Portkey Network? It's not like they're trying to stay off the grid.

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He stood up to shake their hands. "I'm Captain Peppard.

"My friends call me Hannibal."

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Second Mate Copley's in the bridge at the wheel now and, ah, here's First and Third Mates Cooper and Jackson, now."

Harry and Hermione turned to the spiral staircase in the corner that the children had just run up, to see two more men emerging from the lower floors of the ship. The first could have been Peppard's son – a handsome tanned face with sparkling blue eyes and tousled dark brown hair, connected to a fit young body. The other was black and compact, with muscles visible under his vest and black turtleneck, and he wore a knitted blue hat despite being indoors.

Holy Crap, it is The A-Team!

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"First Mate Cooper, at your service," the first man said with a grin. "And of course, this is Third Mate Jackson." He motioned to the other.

Movie A-Team. Points off for that.

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Hermione was about to ask what sort of experience qualified the four of them to run a boat this huge, but she felt the boat start. The boat was of course enchanted with an Anti-Inertia charm, but she was still shocked by the view of the dock through the window suddenly disappearing to be replaced by a blur of sea and sky.

Okay, so it is a magic yacht. Points for that at least.

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"Goodness! Isn't your pilot going awful fast?"

Jackson let out a snort. "You should've been here when he was bringing the boat around. This is driving in neutral for him."

Cooper rolled his eyes. "Jackson isn't exactly a fan of Copley's driving skills. Don't worry, he knows what he doing, he just doesn't show it some of the time."

"Comes across as howlin' mad, actually..."

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"So, if you don't mind," Peppard said, vanishing his cigar's ash from the carpet with a flick of his wand. "Would you care to tell me your story?"

Someone in the Wizarding World doesn't recognize the name "Harry Potter?"

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"I'd…rather not," Harry said, after a pause. "Let us just say we're fugitives from laws masquerading as justice."

"Boy, do I know that feeling." Peppard grinned. "You have my sympathies."

Translation: I have no idea what that meant, but you're paying the bills so "Smile and Nod" it is!

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The boat speed forward, sending the three (and the rest of the furniture in the room) rocketing to the back. "Now as you can see," Copley continued, infuriatingly cheerful, "This river runs past Nantes and Angers – "

As Hermione fumbled to find her wand to perform the counter-spell, the boat shot into the air, and she slid off the couch. Through the mirror, she saw water rapidly receding from the boat's bottom as it flew over a bridge. For one moment the furniture and the three of them floated in the air as the boat fell to the water, only to come crashing back to the ground once the boat hit river.

Obviously, we're meant to see this as something akin to the Knight Bus from Prisoner of Azkaban (read: pulling off magically enabled hijinks). But I still can't help thinking "Bullshit. That's something like this moving like a speedboad in a Bond movie. Magic be damned, BULLSHIT I say!"

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The boat had finally come down from its tilt – only to rear up, performing what Hermione could only imagine was a nautical wheelie. Below, she could hear Jackson bellowing, "YOU TRYIN' TO KILL ME AGAIN, FOOL?"

Just in case any of you weren't clued in before: They yacht crew is the Wizarding A-Team.

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While still in the wheelie the left side to hit something, sending the boat into the air spiraling. Captain Peppard, Harry, and Hermione (the former cursing like a sailor, the latter trying not to throw up), along with the rest of the furniture, tumbled around the middle of the boat as Copley did barrel roll after barrel roll.

"– of Region Cen-tre! Here we are! Cha-toe de Noor! Entering the har-"

The boat pulled out of its sixteenth or seventeenth barrel roll (Hermione had lost count) to land with one last crash in the river.

Confirming ruling of "Bullshit."

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"Sorry 'bout the mess," he said mildly, lighting another cigar. "If you want to, though, the bridge is just up those stairs." He nodded to a second set of stairs near the front of the ship. "You can have a word with our pilot there."

"Oh, I certainly will," Hermione said, her temper flaring. In a few steps she had covered the distance between her and the steps, rushing up them with Harry close behind.

"And thank you for choosing Batshit Insane Cruise Lines!"

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He gave her a cheeky smile. "Enjoy your trip, ma'am?"

"Enjoy?" Hermione fumed. "Did you think I'd enjoy being tossed around like a rag doll?"

"Not as much as I enjoyed tossing you, truth be told."

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"Don't blame me," he interrupted, blue eyes widening to give a Bambi-like expression. "Was the kids that wanted it. And if you pardon my language, ma'am, this whole 'Anti-Inertia' stuff's for pussies. When I'm drivin' a boat, I wanna feel like I'm drivin' a boat, not playin' some dumbass video game."

At this point, a slap, a refund and a lawyer would be in the offing. Not necessarily in that order.

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Hermione was about to retort with a few choice words when Harry gently took her arm. "Come on, 'Mione. We're at our new home, let's just get out and get settled."

Hermione let out her breath. He was right, it wasn't worth it. She turned to the children.

"Let's go, kids. It's time to move in to our new home."

Even Reckless Endangerment can be soothed with The Power Of Love™!

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"Thank you for riding with us, sir," Peppard said, shaking Harry and Hermione's hands one more time. "I hope we'll see each other again."

And I will make very sure that we won't, Hermione thought bitterly as she took her hand away from his. When Harry and she turned to look up at the imposing castle before them, Peppard spoke one last time.

"If you ever need any help – I'm sure you can find us."

They're the A-Team. WE GET IT. Actually, no I don't. What's the point of this gag other than "I thought it would be funny if they were delivered to Chateau Du Harmony by the A-Team?"

And that, as they say, is that. FOR NOW! *cue ominous thunder*

Freezer wrote:

IIRC, Harry was rich, but not THIS rich, even if you add in Sirius' money (Which couldn't have really been all THAT much considering he was disowned).

You may be right there, but a common trait in Fanon (Along with all the "Harry Potter Characters read the books" fics I've read) is that the Potter fortune has grown to such proportions that you'd need to win the Euromillions ten times even to get close.

She made the movie A-Team guys into her loveboat crew? I think I might have to kill her now. This...what is this, I don't even....



Die, piggy, piggy, die, DIE!

Where is Jacob Grimm when you need him to write a gruesome bloody tale of evil witches being burned, anyway?

I didn't realise that the boat crew were the A-Team, not least because my eyes had glazed over from all the glurge, but now you point it out it's so obvious. And besides, who expected anything original after the first four cliché-ridden chapters?

GeorgeUK wrote:

You may be right there, but a common trait in Fanon (Along with all the "Harry Potter Characters read the books" fics I've read) is that the Potter fortune has grown to such proportions that you'd need to win the Euromillions ten times even to get close.

One particular fic of my acquaintance made offhand mention of his bank account doubling every ten weeks as a result of Snape's potion sales. This implies the demand for potions and Snape's ability to satisfy it also doubled every ten weeks.

OMFG, she swooned! She actually swooned!

Well obviously, her corset was too tightly laced and Harry's suggestion gave her an attack of the vapors!

My sister has a antique Victorian fainting couch, and whenever I visit her, we take turns swooning onto it, with one hand thrown across our fevered brows. Sweet Jesus, I don't think even Harlequin romances are this sappy any more!

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One particular fic of my acquaintance made offhand mention of his bank account doubling every ten weeks as a result of Snape's potion sales. This implies the demand for potions and Snape's ability to satisfy it also doubled every ten weeks.

My math sucks, but by my best estimate (assuming the Wizarding World follows a 52 week calender), Snape would have to be working non-stop 24-hours a day seven days a week, and he STILL wouldn't be able to keep up with the demand for potions.

Besides which, by this point, he's dead, isn't he?

I don't know if authors want to get Harry and Hermione together, why don't they kill off their respective spouses without assassinating the characters as well. This one has Ron working as an Auror (noncanon): sure it can't be that hard to be offed by a runaway Snatcher, get in the way of a Killing Curse, or be processed into werewolf turds. For Ginny it's a bit harder but if she's a blood betraying Weasley and Harry Potter's trophy wife to boot, she would be game for a 'revisionist' serial killer. Then as they grieve together Harry and Hermione find out they have become more than friends.
Does this look far-fetched? That's how my great-grandparents married and had my grandfather (they both had children of their own from their previous marriages).

The vitriol aimed at Ron always me. I'd understand if he was depicted as insufferably perfect and The Wesley; he's not, and he gets even more flak for that. I'd be very very wary of Harmonians in RL - people who manage to fail at picking up the obvious, and then hate someone's guts because of that, are to be given an airplane runway-sized berth.

To me, canon Hermione is The Wesley.

I don't know about that. Hermione has her own flaws that the boys recognize: She's bossy, to the point of annoying them at times, she has a really hard time telling people her own feelings, she gets irritated easily, and she tends to show off if left to her own devices. Occasionally, she gets on the boys' one last nerve and they tell her. She's never portrayed as perfect or always right (Except when it comes to class), because she tends to think by the book and not practically.

I like Hermione, because she's really silly at times, despite how clever she is.

The Harry/Hermione thing is something I never saw. When Harry met her, he was in a pretty vulnerable place. He'd never had friends, or even companions. (He was also 11) And the spot Hermione filled was kind of more familial, at least to me. She filled that voice of reason slot everyone needs among their friends, and took care of the boys. I just couldn't see anything romantic when Harry treated her like a sister. This is kind of the same reason I could never see the Harry/Ron angle. Hermione and Ron just filled a different sort of slot in Harry's life to me.

Half the problem these shippers have is that they can't seem to see that love is not all the same. Harry does love Hermione, and Ron. But that doesn't mean he wants to sleep with them.

Whether Hermione is The Wesley is surely a matter of debate, and although your arguments are very valid, I personally just think she is sueish and obnoxious and everyone who matters is in awe of her awesomeness. But, like I said, it's up for debate.


I agree wholeheartedly that Harry/Hermione have no sexual tension whatsoever. They love each other, but they're not in love. This is something you get a lot in fanfics, though: authors pairing people who would never hook up...like siblings. Ask them if they would screw their own brother/sister and see what they reply to that.

The shipping wars were the main reason why I left the HP fandom.

Freezer wrote:

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Who's this guy? He totally looks like one of our employees and I just must tease the hell out of him because of it.

Rabid Badger wrote:

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One particular fic of my acquaintance made offhand mention of his bank account doubling every ten weeks as a result of Snape's potion sales. This implies the demand for potions and Snape's ability to satisfy it also doubled every ten weeks.

My math sucks, but by my best estimate (assuming the Wizarding World follows a 52 week calender), Snape would have to be working non-stop 24-hours a day seven days a week, and he STILL wouldn't be able to keep up with the demand for potions.

Besides which, by this point, he's dead, isn't he?

It's from Deserving, the fic that my signature comes from, a Snarry mpreg marriage law fic that manages to be an affront to logic on more levels than I care to count. Even by the standards of Snarry mpreg marriage law fics. The exponentially growing potions are one of the less ridiculous things.

Pengwolf wrote:

The Unoriginal wrote:

Freezer wrote:

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Who's this guy? He totally looks like one of our employees and I just must tease the hell out of him because of it.

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NUUUU That's comedy gold. I wish I could provide you with a pic of our guy's ride - you'll have to take it from me that it would be the West Coast Customs crew's wet dream. As it is, it sat uninsured and unregistered in our lot for so long that it had cobwebs underneath.

Everyone is so OOC, I feel like I'm reading an original story with people who just happen to have the same names as the ones from Harry Potter.

I lol'd at the A Team randomly appearing though

Yeah. Steering the love boat to sweet freedom.

I can't get over this. I just can't.

Arise Thread Arise!

I decided to give this thing the full MSTing treatment. Or more accurately, the Rifftrax treatment, as I decided to go with Mike and crew instead of Joel and the bots. Here's some of what I got so far:

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Hermione sighed and checked the kettle one more time.

Kevin: [Hermione] S’okay in the pot?
Mike: S’okay in the pot!

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He was late again. Now she would have to find a way to keep the stew warm while preserving the tenderness of the meat bits.

Mike: So… Somehow taking stewed meat off the flame makes it less tender?
Bill: Wizarding food is weird!

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Why did I marry him? She thought to herself, pushing few stray strands of hair from her face.

Bill: Hey, no one told me this was a Chris Rock crossover! I’m filing a protest with the league!
Mike: No, Bill – that’s “Why Did I Get Married.”
Bill: Oh. Though come to think of it, a good Chris Rock rant might spice things up.
Kevin: Now come on. We’re not two sentences in.
Bill: Kevin, four words: “Harry.” “Potter” “Fan.” “Fiction.”
Kevin: I withdraw my objection.

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Was it because she felt sorry for him, that apparently no other girl would want him?

Mike: And we’re talking about…?
Bill: Ron. We’re talking about Ron. There’s no “Him” in the Potterverse that would attract that kind of derision right off the bat.
Mike: And you would know this because…?
Bill: What? I’m allowed to have hobbies!
Kevin: [Muttering] Fangirl…
Bill: One word, Murphy: “Zutara.”
Kevin: [sputtering] How did you know about...! I mean, “I don’t know what you’re talking about!”
Mike: I’m surrounded by nerds. Baffling, scary nerds.

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Or was it because she felt this was the closest she could ever get to the only man she'd ever loved –

Mike: Neville Longbottom.

Harry Potter, the Boy Who Lived?

Kevin: Technically, you’d be closer by having an affair with Ginny.
Bill: Or one of their kids.
Kevin: …But that would wrong.
Mike: …To say out loud.
Kevin: Of course!

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Ever since she had embraced him in the Potions room during the quest for the Sorcerer's Stone, she knew her heart would belong to no other.

Mike: Yes, she knew her true love ever since she was 11!

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Krum, McLaggen, even Ron, in a sense – they had all been childish attempts at catching his attention, ways to incite jealousy within his heart.

Bill: So Hermione got dumber as she got older? Is that what I’m reading?

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Late at night, while Ron snored and snorted away on his side of the bed, she would warm her heart with treasured memories of Harry – the way he had looked at her as if seeing a goddess on Earth when she had descended the steps to the Yule Ball,

Kevin: Ron’s equally gobsmacked reaction being so much background debris…

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the way he'd gently held her steady as they rode Buckbeak to help Sirius gain his freedom.

Mike: The way his hand would gently caress hers as he copied her potions notes.
Bill: The way his voice would quiver whenever he asked for help in McGonnogal’s class.
Kevin: The way she would apply undue emotional significance to Harry’s actions.
Mike: Yes, thank you, Kevin.
Kevin: …I just missed the point again, didn’t I?
Bill: Just a little.

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She would then cry and curse herself bitterly for not telling him of her love during those precious months when they were alone together seeking the Horcruxes, when night after night they had sought comfort in the other's embraces, and slept in each others' arms.

Kevin: [Hermione] Sure, the sex was great! But where was the love?

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She had finally garnered the courage to speak of her love, to finally find words that could describe the love towards him that poured out of every inch of her being like golden water –

All: EWWW!

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only for that filthy coward to return for God-Knows-What reason.

Bill: Yeah, how dare Ron show up in time to save Harry from drowning? The jackass!

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She still would smile with satisfaction when she thought of the beating she had brought down on him, the rain of blows for ruining the delicate, perfect balance between Harry and her,

Mike: I think someone’s been reading a different version of Deathly Hallows than the rest of us.
Bill: Got that vibe, yeah.

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and wished she could deliver the same beating on him now. But she knew, of course, that whatever abuse she hurled on him, he would in turn hurl tenfold on the children.

Kevin: I’d ask the obvious “Then why don’t divorce him” question, but I have the sinking feeling we’re going to find out. And it’s going to make no sense.

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She checked the kettle again, and sampled a touch of the meat. Still fairly tender.

Mike: If by “tender”, you mean “boiled down into a grayish slurry…”

I wonder, if she hated Ron since the beginning, then why in the Nine Hells did she marry him in the first place? She could go for anyone else.

Speaking of that, why do those fanbrats think Hermione would keep Ron around for seven books anyway?

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golden water

Perhaps the most unfortunate terminology ever.

Assuming this fanbrat's logic is correct and that is a HUUUGE streach of assumption. and the wizarding world is so sexist that there is no spousal abuse support PERIOD, and the divorce laws are so male centric a drunk child abusing bastard like this Ron Clone can get custody no questions asked....

Has this author forgotten that there is a large world of non magical folks that Hermione has lived in for a LONG time and she can call the police who can come and arrest Ron. Or that there are support structures in the non magical world that she could reach out to if necessary.

Trying to arrest a wizard is not such a good idea, but she could go back to the Muggle world, I suppose. They're so stupid, these Weasley Clones, they'd never find her.

How I read this fic (only gone through chapters 1-3):

Ron has PTSD. His wife and best friend are to wrapped up in one another to really care. In fact, his wife murders him instead of running away with the children to a muggle half-way house. Or, you know, talking to someone about the matter. Or finding a loophole that will get her out of the marriage and with the kids.

Ginny is depressed and wishes that her husband loved her. She tries to fill up the hole in her heart by money, friends, and random men. But no matter what, Ginny will never be loved her husband always will wish that she is someone else. Plus the kids are starting to hate her and she can't figure out why. Finally once she loses her looks her husbands dumps her out into the street with nothing but what she could grab right away and goes after a still skinny and good looking other woman. The same night he kicked her out.

bleachedblackcat wrote:

How I read this fic (only gone through chapters 1-3):

Ron has PTSD. His wife and best friend are to wrapped up in one another to really care. In fact, his wife murders him instead of running away with the children to a muggle half-way house. Or, you know, talking to someone about the matter. Or finding a loophole that will get her out of the marriage and with the kids.

Ginny is depressed and wishes that her husband loved her. She tries to fill up the hole in her heart by money, friends, and random men. But no matter what, Ginny will never be loved her husband always will wish that she is someone else. Plus the kids are starting to hate her and she can't figure out why. Finally once she loses her looks her husbands dumps her out into the street with nothing but what she could grab right away and goes after a still skinny and good looking other woman. The same night he kicked her out.

You must post a review discussing this on the pit.

I'd ask to do it myself, but I do my reviews in-character, and I figure one of these days I'll find someone who realizes I'm a troll.

Done

If I get kicked off the pit or spammed I'm gonna blame you

bleachedblackcat wrote:

How I read this fic (only gone through chapters 1-3):

Ron has PTSD. His wife and best friend are to wrapped up in one another to really care. In fact, his wife murders him instead of running away with the children to a muggle half-way house. Or, you know, talking to someone about the matter. Or finding a loophole that will get her out of the marriage and with the kids.

Ginny is depressed and wishes that her husband loved her. She tries to fill up the hole in her heart by money, friends, and random men. But no matter what, Ginny will never be loved her husband always will wish that she is someone else. Plus the kids are starting to hate her and she can't figure out why. Finally once she loses her looks her husbands dumps her out into the street with nothing but what she could grab right away and goes after a still skinny and good looking other woman. The same night he kicked her out.

Ported wholesale (with credit) over to TV Tropes.

SQUEE!!!

You just made my entire day so much better Freezer!