Guptill89 Presents Top Ten Hottest Female Sonic Character's

Watch it.

I have, and misery loves company. WATCH IT!



And now the breakdown:

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Sonic the Hedgehog. One of the greatest and most attractive characters ever thought up

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He knows how to handle the females

We've all read the Love-Shy thread, right? We all know what's wrong with this sentence, right?

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Speaking of females

UGH

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The sonic universe might also be classified as Hot Chick Heaven

In all fairness, one of this contestants is Wave the Swallow, so 'chick' works, right?

wrong.gif

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Number 10 - Amy Rose

YOU START YOUR TOP TEN LIST OF SEX OBJECTS WITH AN UNDER-AGE CHARACTER!

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Though more of a cutie than a hottie, you can't deny that she's still attractive.

I fucking can, you know. SHE'S TWELVE!

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Number 9 - Cosmo

EIGHT

YEARS

OLD!!

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Number 8 - Cream the Rabbit's Mom, Vanilla

Well, at least she's fucking legal.

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She's attractive, and is the size of an average human mother.

It's as though 'mothers' are a subspecies and as such their average height is classified differently than other humans.

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What really surprises me about her is that the leader of Team Chaotix, Vector the Crocodile, falls in love with her.

Another character falls in love with Vanilla, and this is somehow her fault... There's that distinctive 'Love-Shy' aftertaste again.

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she doesn't do much

You have said this about all the characters in this list.

Should we read that inactivity is part of this guy's idea of what is attractive, or that the female characters in Sonic X have no active parts? Flip a fucking coin.

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Number 7 - Wave the Swallow

Well, I learned something in this video at least. Up until now I didn't know this character's name, or the name of her team-mates. THERE I'VE FOUND MY SILVER LINING, DON'T ANY OF YOU TRY TO TAKE IT AWAY!

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Number 6 - Takal the Echidna from Sonic adventure 1

Fuckin' WHO?

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Named after an ancient myan city of the same name

Redundant sentence is redundant.

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She's yet another character who hardly does a thing.

Par for the fucking course...

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*The Count*

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF

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Number 5 - Mina Mongoose

Fuckin' WHO?

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How could you go wrong with a girl who looks like this!

[You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]
Answers on a fucking postcard.

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Number 4 - Blaze the Cat

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What really lands Blaze in the number 4 spot is that her attitude is apparently more different from the other females

There is so much fucking wrong in that sentence that I don't even know where to begin.

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Number 3 - Julie-Su the Echidna

I'll say it again: Fuckin' WHO?

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What's better than a female with cascading quills? How about a female with cascading quills and hair

"A female" ...

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[she's] downright HAWT! Just look at that long ponytail!

Also, what is up with this guy and his obsession with headfur?

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Number 2 - Princess Sally Acorn

The face that launched a thousand furries.

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Antoine constantly tries to woo sally but fails

I wonder why he deemed Antoine's crush so important? It's not as though he was alone in pining for Sally.

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The princess is also a semi-perfect example of an excellent love interest.

"Semi-Perfect"?
Okay, urm, present your argument then, please?

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Although there were...

OI! Answer the question! Why is she a "semi-perfect of an excellent love interest"?

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Although there were some times when she really snapped and acted like a lunatic

No? Not gonna qualify your statement? Fine...
Also - "Snapped and acted like a lunatic", ehhno. The phrase you are looking for is: "spoke her mind and made choices for herself". Although, given all the preceding, I can understand how you can some to confuse the terms.

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Sally Acorn really stands out amongst the slew of females

I can actually hear Cy cracking her knuckles...

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Not just because she's [...] the only one who didn't wear clothes.

He points this out twice... Also, there were several female characters in Sat:AM & the comics who were furry nudists. Also: THEY'RE FUCKING FURRIES!

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[She's hawt because] in the comics she grew very longs hair...

Again with the hair?

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Who can possibly top those kinds of females?

antilifejustifiesmyhateantilifejustifiesmyhate

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Number 1 - Rouge the Bat

BECAUSE SHE HAS BEWBS HURRRRR

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My hat goes off to you, Sonic Team USA. You aught to be proud.

And if any of them ever sees this video, I'm sure they will be.


What do you make of this, Sonic?

[You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

You know why I could never get into Sonic, even as a kid?

The mono-eyeball.

That shit could never work. Ever. It's physically impossible. Nevermind that there's talking, shoe-wearing, sound-barrier-breaking hedgehogs in this universe.

Mono-eyeball.

Can't.

Happen.

WD40 wrote:

Fri Feb 18, 2011 10:40 pm

Sakurelf wrote:

10:43 pm

The video is eight minutes long. You have not watched it!

WATCH IT! NOW!

...

...

I don't want to suffer alone...

WD40 wrote:

WD40 wrote:

Fri Feb 18, 2011 10:40 pm

Sakurelf wrote:

10:43 pm

The video is eight minutes long. You have not watched it!

WATCH IT! NOW!

...

...

I don't want to suffer alone...

At school. No sounds allowed. :<

It seems appropriate to add this in response to that video, WD40.

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One of the most attractive things about [Amy] is that she wears a dress

pffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffftsnrrk

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Numero Ocho (spanish)

ORLY

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Num-hehro Cease

Dude, you've already worked way too damn hard to compile this stitty video, enough! Stop raping the Spanish language.

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One word: Pyrokenesis. How much would you love to have that power? I mean, she could play in the Himalayas for hours and be perfectly fine!

Well, that's one use for that power, I suppose. Simple minds...

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Her future self is just plain hot! Just look at that ponytail! Now we're talking!

I feel wierd for saying this, but really? Ponytail? Nothing about the fact that she has the Sonic equivalent of DDs or one of the most non penis/cameltoe crotches I've ever seen? Nothing about any of that, just her ponytail? Dude, if you're going to objectify women, do it right.

OH YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN DON'T SHOOT ME

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ONE TWO BUTTON MY SHOE!!

WHY???

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[Rouge] is as strong as Knuckles

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[Who wouldn't want to] be as strong as Sean Johnson

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[Reasons to find Rouge hot] 3: Strength of a gymnast

So Knuckles is only as strong as Sean Johnson, the gymnast?

This guy has the nerdiest voice I think I've ever heard in my life. Holy God, that was painful.

Jesus. wrote:

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One word: Pyrokenesis. How much would you love to have that power? I mean, she could play in the Himalayas for hours and be perfectly fine!

Well, that's one use for that power, I suppose. Simple minds...

It's sad that's the only thing he could think to use Pyrokinesis for. Me? I'd be Carrie with a penis!

WD40 wrote:

WD40 wrote:

Fri Feb 18, 2011 10:40 pm

Sakurelf wrote:

10:43 pm

The video is eight minutes long. You have not watched it!

WATCH IT! NOW!

...

...

I don't want to suffer alone...

OKOKWATCHINGITNOW

My first impression: This guy seems like he's reading out a post he found on a forum somewhere. The video is actually pretty well-timed andthe clips and pictures would require some editing skill.


"Have you ever seen anyone else with three giant pink whatevers sticking out of their head?"

No. Because it's a cartoon.
It's like it wants to be sarcastic, but then the next sentence is just so full of WTF.

"Something Tails needed for a LONG while."

Look, no-aging-in-an-old-series jokes aside, isn't Tails a kid? Like 12?

"She's attractive and the size of an average human mother."
So, about 5'6?

Oh, wait, you meant fat.

"Wave"

Everything about this character is stupid.

"...transitions..."

First Spanish, then French, then I find myself thinking "Oh, please not another language." Thankfully, no. It's... the Count.

"Blaze could play around in the Himelayas for hours and she would be perfectly fine!"

UNTIL YOU GET EATEN BY A YETI NOM

"Julie-Sue"

Facts that make me think this character is a victim of inbreeding:

- Her name is Julie-Sue
- She wears no pants

"So, you've seen a cat, a swallow, two gorgeous echidnas and a PRINCESS."

That proves it. Disney Princesses ARE another species.

"... the rest of it..."

Can't care enough to comment. :<

...This is a troll, right? How can this actually be serious?? ...I'm going to just go on believing this is a troll. :|

[edit] THE VIDEO ENDS WITH A FUCKING RICK ASTLEY SONG?? BITCH, YOU BE TROLLIN'!

your mom wrote:

...This is a troll, right? How can this actually be serious?? ...I'm going to just go on believing this is a troll. :|

[edit] THE VIDEO ENDS WITH A FUCKING RICK ASTLEY SONG?? BITCH, YOU BE TROLLIN'!

I want to believe this, but a little googleing and wading through response vid after response vid, Guptill89 appears to be a genuine nutball.

This Top-10 list is no longer hosted on his own YouTube page, (The bio of which paints a particularly sad picture) and there is evidence of a number of response-vid replies, that have also been pulled.

There is also a Facebook page that matches the Youtube profile. One intrepid researcher has said he's found Gyptil's webpage, which, allegedly, presents an equally sad picture...

Consensus on Topless Robot and Comics Alliance is that the guy is, sadly, genuine.

[edit] Website

Oh man... I almost feel sorry for him... If he wasn't a creepy misogynist, anyway.

WD40 wrote:

your mom wrote:

...This is a troll, right? How can this actually be serious?? ...I'm going to just go on believing this is a troll. :|

[edit] THE VIDEO ENDS WITH A FUCKING RICK ASTLEY SONG?? BITCH, YOU BE TROLLIN'!

Oh man... I almost feel sorry for him... If he wasn't a creepy misogynist, anyway.

Do you think that something might actually be wrong with him? Because honestly, the voice, what gets him all excited, the style of the video, makes him seem either very immature or very simple more than just plain cuckoopants. He seems to have a very odd view of the world. not excusing it, I'm just putting that out there.

I'm calling closet furry on this guy. There seems to be no other possible explanation.

Jesus. wrote:

Do you think that something might actually be wrong with him?

Hell yeah. In fact, after reading his summary of the video, I'm convinced he regularly indulges in every narcotic that's known to man and one or two that aren't.

WD40 wrote:

WD40 wrote:

Fri Feb 18, 2011 10:40 pm

Sakurelf wrote:

10:43 pm

The video is eight minutes long. You have not watched it!

WATCH IT! NOW!

They might have already seen it on Topless Robot, I know I did.
(And it was bad )

TheIan wrote:

I'm calling closet furry on this guy. There seems to be no other possible explanation.

Clostet? [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

Oh god why did you do this to me.

Why.

This makes me so glad that my only exposure to Sonic as a child was the shitty cartoon every now and then.

This kind of makes me want to find stupid 'top 10' lists for other series because I'm morbidly curious and apparently enjoy torturing myself.

I see this guy and all I'm thinking is "it's like there's a second Chris-chan in the world".

Snake Bandage wrote:

I see this guy and all I'm thinking is "it's like there's a second Chris-chan in the world".

...you stole my line


In fact I kind of want Chris and him to become friends interesting science progect for the shit disterbers out there

Snake Bandage wrote:

I see this guy and all I'm thinking is "it's like there's a second Chris-chan in the world".

God, let's hope not. The first one's bad enough.