And does so with his trusty butler Dave. And no pedophilia [at least, not yet anyway I hope
please God don't let this devolve into slashfic I'll pay you cash monies I swear]!
The Wall - a South Park fanfic by
kennethey - Quote :
- Here's my new SP story which combines the show “South Park” and the movie “Pink Floyd The Wall”. Here Stan, Wendy and their friends are part of the Neo-nazi plan of the Pink Floyd The Wall actor Bob Geldof to take over the world. Also, there will be characters from the show “SuperNews!”
I must, first of all, say that I have seen neither The Wall [though I'm a fan of the album and have been for years] nor 'SuperNews!' [though a quick watch of the top video result on YouTube shows yet another generic political commentary show], so those two aspects of the fic may prove too difficult to overcome in my snark. Oh, wait, what am I saying - the level of WTF present in the text completely overshadows such a thing happening.
- (POV from the narrator from "SuperNews!) wrote:
-
completely missing the point of The Wall to begin with.
But I believe escaping from the world, isolation and alienation
were the whole point behind
The Wall to begin with. Because Roger Waters' childhood was messed up and HIS DAD DIED IN A WAR and he hated the world and so on - if this was parody!fic and you were brushing over everything with hum-
- Quote :
- Genre: Horror/Angst
... no.
Bad author.Well. Let us just get buried in to the fic itself, shall we?
- Quote :
- Daddy's flown across the ocean
Leaving just a memory
...
All in all it was all just bricks in the wall.
Hey! I'm trying to listen to Zappa here; if I would have known you were going to go all Songfic on me here I would have put on my own copy of the album to get in to the mood of things. Oh, actually, now that I remember the genre of the fic in question I think it would be a great time to check out the
trve kvlt Blvck Metvl remix of The Wall I have buried somewhere. And maybe sacrifice a teenager. HORROR AND ANGST.
- Quote :
- Bob Geldof was just returning from his concert and driving in his limo.
“Driver my house,” he said.
Was this one of those special
James May Alfa Romeo/Saab limos, with steeing wheels at each end? Co-operation is the key to handling one of those feats of engineering.
- Quote :
- His limo was surrounded by fans of his music and then they drove off at 50 MPH.
"That's the perfect speed in which to shake off the hordes of screaming teenage girls. Lennon told me this: too slow and they just hold on; too fast and, well, you know those rumours of Paul being dead... ? I believe you hear of his fate should you play Revolution 9 backwards."
- Quote :
- “My God it's like 'The Wall'” Bob said.
My God, it's like a badfic!
- Quote :
- He goes up to his front door where he is greeted by his butler, Dave.
“I had the most eventful day,” Bob said in a grim reaper voice.
[You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]"I had the most eventful day"[You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]Then I put on my rape face Grim Reaper voice. - Quote :
- “I know you just got back from your Cross-country tour--”
“Actually I'm just taking a break and I'm be back on my feet in no time,” Bob said while making tea.
Bloody musicians and their tendencies to take up marathoning/saving the world outside of their performances.
- Quote :
- “You did a gig in Tokyo?” Dave asked.
“Yes,” Bob said.
“I see,” Dave said.
Quite the entralling interaction between men we are witnessing here. I am enraptured.
- Quote :
- “You know Dave I want to rule the world because it is not a friendly place and I want to clean it up a bit,” Bob said.
"Clean it up a bit"? What, spray a little
Windex on Somalia? Spit-shine famine? And just who do you think you are, Mr. Geldof? Light Yagami? Go call up Bono, I'm pretty sure something can be worked up.
- Quote :
- “I need a child not just any child but a child who is sensitive enough to get kids associated with him to trust him with anything,” Bob said.
“Oh,” Dave said.
“But how can I find a popular and nice child? How?!” Bob asked.
As we're in badfic country, I suggest an orphanage, Mr. Geldof. Chances are you will come across a darling little boy with a twagic backstory and is completely and utterly perfect and loved by everybody.
- Quote :
- “You know there's facebook,” Dave said.
Excuse me while I clean up my dinner. I seem to have knocked it over whilst laughing for the last thirty minutes.
- Quote :
- “Facebook? What is this facebook,” Bob asked.
Oh, my chicken fillet is cold and dirty now.
- Quote :
- “Facebook is a social networking website that helps you see people,” Dave said.
“I see with this facebook I can find a child willing to be my power for world domination,” Bob said.
“Yeah and you have builded the weapons,” Dave said.
This fic can be analyzed in several ways: from the mind of a badfic snarker, I cannot say I eagerly await the explanation behind why Dave knows how to "see people", or why Bob needs a "sensitive child" when he is Bob fucking Geldof, or what these "weapons" may be.
And "builded"?
I don't think such a word exists in texts from the last few hundred years. Bob may be something of a Dinosaur, but he can keep up with the times, buddy.
- Quote :
- “Indeed,” Bob got up from his chair and went to his computer to find this child he is looking. He is setting up his facebook account.
Bob
Geldof
.
PinkFloydTheWall
Male
10/5/1951
This profile is boring. This profile is so boring it has sapped away what little sense of humour I may have had left. I hope you're happy with yourself.
- Quote :
- Then he tried to search for a sensitive and popular child who is under ht age of 13. An hour later his search was completed.
And late into the evening, the cops were kind enough to pay him a visit.
The Sun's front page, the following day:
NOB GELDING OFF ON CHILD PORN - Quote :
- “Did you find this child you were looking for sir?” Dave asked.
“Oh yes Dave and I found a cute 8 year old boy,” Bob said.
"and"? And?
And? :roflmao:
So in addition to actually finding the boy he wishes to use in taking over the world, ol' Bob thought he'd also reach out to a second child because... well, maybe he was lonely?
- Quote :
- “He's Stan Marsh who lives in a small mountain town in Colorado called South Park,” Bob said.
“Wow,” Dave said.
I can't stop laughing at this "He said, he said" dialogue. It just adorable.
- Quote :
- Then Bob got out his iphone.
[You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]This just in: Bob Geldof is an Applefag. Goddamn hipster.
- Quote :
- “Whoa,” Dave said.
Dave is simply a gibbering mess of shock and awe, as you all see.
- Quote :
- “Can it be done Master?” Dave asked.
"Yes," murmered Darth Fatherofasluttywhore, as he contemplated the mission he was about to undertake.
- Quote :
- “This isn't some kind of joke is it?” Dave asked.
“I am not known for my sense of fun,” Bob said.
:roflmao:
- Quote :
- “Master if you go will there be--”
“A new kind of Death will arise from the minds of the living help and that help is Stan,” Bob said.
“You don't know him sir,” Dave said.
“No, but when I see him I will hardly recommend it,” Bob said.
“Oh You'll see him then,” Dave said.
“Oh yes when he comes for me,” Bob said.
This seems to be what you'd hear if Monty Python tried to do a Star Wars sketch.
*****
Well, thanks for at least entertaining me, dear author. Unfortunately there's only one chapter uploaded so far however he has several other stories that are all based off of some kind of historic event/novel. I'm not all that savvy on any of the other topics at hand, however. I figured anybody reading this would possibly be interested to know of their existance, however.
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