Let Myth dominate the SamXBee, I'll go for roboMpreg. This time around we have some unexpected situations, which is why I'm sacrificing this to the gods of WGW - I wish you accept it.
And because of my evil twin kept insisting me to take them out for a snark, here is Jänis again.
Jänis:Yo!
Sorsa:Just don't do anything stupid.
Firestrike's arrival by Kittylover9399
Sorsa:I shall use extra many kitties in this snark to honor the author.
- Quote :
- It was another busy day for the medic, just as usual, once again working on his day off, sighing he continued to read one of the data pads, wanting to finish them off before carrying on with his busy schedule for the day.
Sorsa:Why they are always so busy?
Jänis:Well haven't you noticed how Ratchet has been busy spawning out babies recently? That's why.
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- He said smirking as he leaned on the medic, kissing him as Ratchet automatically began to blush, slightly breaking the kiss.
Sorsa:I really do wonder how a robot blushes.
Jänis:I would be more concerned about the sparks flying when they kiss. Also the screeching voices.
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- A few days later Ratchet woke up, feeling extremely nauseas, the second he stood up he gasped, covering his mouth and running to the waste basket, quickly throwing up into it. Groaning he held his stomach as he threw up again, coughing as he did, Ironhide had walked in while Ratchet was throwing up and gasped, running over to his mate.
“Oh Ratchet! You’re sick darlin’!”
Jänis:AND SO ARE YOU AUTHOR!
Sorsa:Shut up! It isn't necessarily a pregnancy - It could be a virus or something.
Jänis:*Glares at Sorsa*
Sorsa:It was merely a suggestion!
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- The medic groaned some more as he nodded, Ironhide pulling up a chair and sitting down next to him, sighing, what could have gotten his medic so sick…there was no diseases going through the ark, so what could it have been?
Jänis:Gee! I wonder what that could be
Sorsa:Stop being like that! It really could be some sort of disease, maybe a parasite?
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- A few hours later Ratchet began to feel better but began to complain about being extremely hungry, poor Ironhide having to run back and forth from the reck room to med bay until the mech finally snapped and grabbed a tray, filling it up with cups of energon for his mate. After only about one earth hour all the cups on the tray was finished off and desert dried empty, but at least Ratchet was finally full and wasn’t bitching about being hungry any longer.
Jänis:You know Sorsa, there actually is a condition that causes symptoms like this.
Sorsa:What is it? Tell me?
Jänis:Badfic pregnancy.
[You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]Then Ratchet eats some more and more,with occasional cuddling with Ironhide.
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- “I-Ironhide…I-I’m pregnant…”
Jänis:HAHAHAHAHAA! What did I say? I won this one!
Sorsa:SORRY THAT I STILL HAVE FAITH IN HUMANITY!
[You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]Chapter 2
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- “I DON’T KNOW! The tests…they said I was pregnant…this is impossible! How can a guy get pregnant…unless…”
Sorsa:There are robo!pregnancy tests?
Jänis:That's common knowledge STUUUPID!
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- Even if possible though, it was extremely rare and also dangerous for that mech, or better known as a breeder which could be used for the Decepticons cause in order to get more recruits for their growing army.
Sorsa:So basicly Ratchet is a robo!Sow or baby making machine.
Jänis:Totally logical, because medics are ukes anyway, so why not sows.
Sorsa:Didn't I warn you to NOT act stupid.
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- Ironhide murmured as he finished reading the content and turned his head to look at Ratchet who had slight tears forming in his widened blue optics.
Jänis:I can't stand a giant alien robot crying.
Sorsa:What has suddenly gotten into you?
Jänis:I said that I
can't stand it and I mean it LITERALLY.
Now it's the best part of the fic. Take a good seat folks.
- Quote :
- “Shhh, it will be okay Ratch, we’ll think of somethin’…”
“LIKE WHAT?! I can’t do an abortion on myself…better yet it’s wrong to get an abortion anyway! Besides, Prime would be in a frenzy if he found out, there’s a war going on and sparklings are all in such danger at this time! Nobody is ever there to protect them!”
Jänis:IT'S A PRO-LIFER ROBOT!
Sorsa:Aren't you bothered by the possibility of robo!Abortion a slightest bit?
Jänis:ABORTION IS THE RIGHT OF ALL SENTIENT BEINGS!
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- The next day Ironhide went to Prime and began to explain to the leader about Ratchet’s situation, and nearly begged if they could keep the sparkling, promising he would take the best of care of it, putting his life on the line first, especially for when Ratchet was going to be come heavily pregnant in a few months.
Jänis:Something familiar here?
Sorsa:Yeah, more pregnancy cliches...ON A ROBOT!
[You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]Chapter 3
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- It takes about a good five months for a mech to be pregnant until they give birth, a four month difference than the average human birth, by three months Ratchet’s belly had changed greatly, the red stomach sticking out but it was nice and round, perfectly smooth.
Sorsa:At least the author is trying to consider that it's robots we are talking about here. Though I still think I'm gonna throw up.
Jänis:Ratchet has attached a red balloon to himself. YAY FOR THE SUPERLINKS!
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- “I still can not believe my stomach is suppose to get bigger than this…oh goodness…a whole two more months until it is all finally over…how the hell with I manage going through this…?”
Sorsa:Don't ask me Ratchet. I have no idea. I kind of think that ROBOTS SHOULDN'T BE PREGNANT IN THE FIRST PLACE!
Jänis:He has a fanbrat as an author, she'll figure out something.
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- “It is NOT funny Hide!”
Sorsa:There are no words for how much I agree with you.
Jänis:Amen.
[You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]Chapter 4
Jänis:How much more there's to go, because I kind of WANT TO BE SOMEWHERE ELSE!
Sorsa:Don't worry, this is the last chapter.
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- Ratchet could be giving birth any day now, and both Ironhide and Ratchet were extremely happy and excited to see their new sparkling, especially Ratchet since he wanted the darn thing out of him.
Sorsa:Well if I was a giant alien robot, I would want to get out the darn thing too. Hell if I was pregnant as myself, I would like the darn thing out of me like RIGHT NOW.
Jänis:That's because you're one of those nasty Pro-Choice people killing babies.
Sorsa:So are you.
Jänis:Oh...! Yeah...
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- So here he was, heavily pregnant, sore, grumpy, and most of all uncomfortable on the damn berth he was forced to stay on for days on end. Ratchet just couldn’t help but feel like a lazy slob, all he was doing was laying on his freaking aft, eating like a pig (or at least he did when the sparkling was growing and starved him to no end), recharge and watch TV all day, every day.
IT WAS DRIVING HIM NUTS.
Sorsa:I think the author has copy pasted all the description of robo preggers from that crazy author who had robots popping out litters. Can't they be original at least?
Jänis:NOT EVERYBODY CAN BE SO CREATIVE TO PASTE STUFF FROM WIKIPEDIA, STUUUUUPID!
Sorsa:SHUT UP OR I'LL THROW YOU OUT!
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- “I freaking hate you…”
Jänis:I hate you too.
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- His grumpy thoughts had quickly turned into pained ones as Ratchet yelped out, squeezing his stomach in pain, that darn sparkling was doing it again, it was kicking him, and hard, Primus it was painful to the poor medic. But he couldn’t help but smile at the same time whenever he felt those kicks, mostly because they were strong and well, it was just like Ironhide, his father.
“I see you’ve got daddy’s strength…”
Jänis:YOU WANTED ORIGINALITY! HERE'S SOME ORIGINALITY FOR YOU!
Sorsa:Robo babies kick in the stomach. I hope nothing important isn't detached in the process.
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- “Sheesh, you’ve put me through the damn pit you, yet, I love you anyway, but I would sure love you even more if you DECIDED TO LEAVE MY BODY ALREADY!”
Sorsa:This is so schizophrenic.
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- “It’s doing…alright…a little painful here or there, but alright. But Primus Jazz, how did you do it? How did you go through such hardships, I mean…you had TWINS.
Jänis:IT'S A CONSPIRACY!
The rest of the fic is just Jazz and Ratchet speaking like housewives, so instead of trying to do anymore unfunny snark I'll offer you kitties.
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