Trucker jackknifes while jacking off

It's a case of driving while wanking.

Quote :

A German trucker suspected of driving under the influence of drugs crashed his vehicle near Borås in western Sweden on Tuesday. He subsequently admitted to masturbating at the time of the accident.

Apparently he did not learn to keep his hands on the wheel in driving school.

Quote :

The trucker, apparently unable to reach a satisfactory climax, then proceeded to continue to pleasure himself while in the midst of a
police interrogation, according to the local Borås Tidning newspaper.

"He was masturbating while the police interrogated him," police prosecutor Åsa Askenbäck told the newspaper.

Wow, how horny do you have to be to do that? Or how unable to orgasm?

Quote :

"He has admitted that he was not paying full attention at the time of the accident. He was playing with himself instead of focusing on the
road."

No kidding.

Quote :

The German trucker, who is in his thirties, has admitted all of the charges directed against him.

[You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] For some reason I find that hilarious.

This is a man who is proud of his accomplishments.

Or crazy.

So he literally 'jacked off'...the road, that is.

I swear I read the title of this thread wrong. I think I prefered it that way. How the hell do you manage that? I mean seriously, why the hell would you jack off and drive?

Pull over if you want a nut that bad. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

T.S.Orr wrote:

I mean seriously, why the hell would you jack off and drive?

Because he was bored? I mean, seriously. It gets dull after the third hour.

Which drugs make this insatiable horniness happen? Er, just so I can avoid them, of course...

Snoof wrote:

T.S.Orr wrote:

I mean seriously, why the hell would you jack off and drive?

Because he was bored? I mean, seriously. It gets dull after the third hour.

It really does get boring and it's even more boring when your vehicle doesn't go faster than 90km/h. You should see what crzy things truck drivers do while driving, though I've never heard of somebody jacking off while driving.

I've seen a trucker jacking off while driving the long, dull stretch through the California desert.

I was very glad my car could easily outdistance that truck.

Quote :

He subsequently admitted to masturbating at the time of the accident.

Even if that's what happened, why on earth would you ever admit to that?

Narwhal wrote:

Quote :

He subsequently admitted to masturbating at the time of the accident.

Even if that's what happened, why on earth would you ever admit to that?

Because if he lies about what happened in an insurance report or statement to the police, he can get charged with fraud or worse, rather than just negligence?

Seriously. It's embarassing and stupid, but he was smart not to compound the issue by lying to the investigators.

Go 'way! 'M batin!

ZoZo wrote:

Which drugs make this insatiable horniness happen? Er, just so I can avoid them, of course...

The "insatiable" bit makes it sounds rather annoying, actually.

Mafiosa wrote:

This is a man who is proud of his accomplishments.

Or crazy.

My money's on crazy.

Snoof wrote:

Narwhal wrote:

Quote :

He subsequently admitted to masturbating at the time of the accident.

Even if that's what happened, why on earth would you ever admit to that?

Because if he lies about what happened in an insurance report or statement to the police, he can get charged with fraud or worse, rather than just negligence?

Seriously. It's embarassing and stupid, but he was smart not to compound the issue by lying to the investigators.

Did you see the part about jacking off during the interrogation?

VB wrote:

Go 'way! 'M batin!

Ah, you've seen Idiocracy too!
I remember once reading this article in a women's magazine where someone asked the health editor how much masturbation was too much. The health editor's answer was "Can you stop long enough to hold a job?" Guess this guy was just doing it too much.

Melissa wrote:

Ah, you've seen Idiocracy too!

I think it's pretty much required viewing for this forum.

Penguin wrote:

Snoof wrote:

Narwhal wrote:

Quote :

He subsequently
admitted to masturbating at the time of the accident.

Even if that's what happened, why on earth would you ever admit to that?

Because if he lies about what happened in an insurance report or statement to the police, he can get charged with fraud or worse, rather than just negligence?

Seriously. It's embarassing and stupid, but he was smart not to compound the issue by lying to the investigators.

Did you see the part about jacking off during the interrogation?

Huh. Shows how much attention I was paying. I stand corrected - the guy's crazy.

ZoZo wrote:

Which drugs make this insatiable horniness happen? Er, just so I can avoid them, of course...

Cocaine, when injected into the penis. This can also cause erections that persist to the point of dangerousness, or so I hear...

saeku wrote:

ZoZo wrote:

Which drugs make this insatiable horniness happen? Er, just so I can avoid them, of course...

Cocaine, when injected into the penis. This can also cause erections that persist to the point of dangerousness, or so I hear...

*files away for future reference*

Pity, coke doesn't seem to agree with me. All it makes me do is double my speed at crossword and sudoku puzzles. And then crow about my prowess.

Penguin wrote:

Melissa wrote:

Ah, you've seen Idiocracy too!

I think it's pretty much required viewing for this forum.

Recommended viewing, anyway. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

This guy is truly a role model for multitaskers everywhere.