Why God, Why?
Would you like to react to this message? Create an account in a few clicks or log in to continue.
Why God, Why?


 
HomeHome  Latest imagesLatest images  RegisterRegister  Log in  

 

 Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter)

Go down 
+13
Freezer
Inciter
anangrychocobo
Chaltab
Melissa
Notomys mordax
Wandering Critic
grmblfjx
unskilled78
EileenK98
Nar
aqua mew
Zoe9
17 posters
AuthorMessage
Zoe9

Zoe9


Join date : 2009-07-18
Age : 32
Location : Hell

Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter) Empty
PostSubject: Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter)   Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter) EmptySun Jul 19, 2009 1:42 am

While I was traversing the Pit, I came across a fic titled Poisoned love and bleeding wrists . You could tell that it would be bad from just the summary.

Quote :
Okay this is a story by my bff, Jade. NO FLAMES! It is really good, trust me. DON'T READ THOUGH IF YOU HATE EMOS! Warning: Self harm
And that is the entire summary. Looks promising, doesn't it?

Now that we are all well informed as to what we are reading about, thanks to the summary, grab your choice alcohol and let's dive right in.

Quote :

HI PPL MAH NAME IS JADE I AM FRANKI'S BF LOL. THE STUPID COMPUTER WONT LET ME CREATE AN ACCOUNT, WE MADE FRIENDS AND NOW SHE LET ME POST MY OWN STORY ON HERE BECAUSE SHE SAYS IT IS GOOD.

ANYWAY I WRITE IN CAPITALS LOL CAUSE IT MAKES IT STAND OUT LAUGH OUT LOUD. BASICALLY BEACSUE I LIKE TO STAND OUT IN A CROWD!!!!1 THAT'S RIGHT. IM SCENE BIOTCHEZ!!!!!!!!!! RAWR! BE JEALOS OF MY BIG SMEXY HAIR!!!!!!!!! XD
GAH! Quit shouting! Jezz... Are you trying to deafen me? Oh, and just because your BFF Franki tells you it's good doesn't mean it is.

-snip-
Quote :
EDWARD HAD JUST FOUND OUT THAT HE WAS A WIZARD SO
he immediately changed his name to Cedric Diggory and left for Hogwarts.

-snip- Bella has conveinently left our wizard!Edward for Jacob, who killed her and then committed suicide. Edward, the Maybelline poster boy, is now emo!Edward too.
Quote :
SUDDENLY, JUST AS HE WAS THINKING WHETHER HE SHOULD CUT HIS WRISTS
HOW?!?! Is the blade made out of dimonds or something!? He's spending an awful lot of money just to be able to cut. It's not even like he would bleed and the blade would probably still break anyway, so what's the point?

I can't take much more of this. It's hard on the eyes. Excuse me while I go kill myself. :headshot:
Back to top Go down
aqua mew

aqua mew


Join date : 2009-06-16

Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter) Empty
PostSubject: Re: Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter)   Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter) EmptySun Jul 19, 2009 2:30 am

Quote :
RAWR! BE JEALOS OF MY BIG SMEXY HAIR!!!!!!!!! XD

WE ARE ALL JEALOS!!!!!!!!!! XD
Back to top Go down
Nar




Join date : 2009-07-17

Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter) Empty
PostSubject: Re: Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter)   Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter) EmptySun Jul 19, 2009 7:15 am

Quote :
EDWARD HAD JUST FOUND OUT THAT HE WAS A WIZARD
SO HE WAS HAD CHANGED QUITE ALOT.
He'd developed curves in all the right places.

Quote :
IT TURNS OUT THAT BELLA
REALLY LOVED JACOB SO SHE HAD RUN OFF WITH HIM BUT THEN HE ABUSED HER
AND SHE SLIT HER WRISTS BECAUSE SHE WAS DEPRESSED ABOUT IT. SHE
REALISED THAT SHE LOVED EDWARD BUT JACOB MURDERED HER AFTER SHE
PHONED HIM TO TELL HIM.
Wait. I'm sure this can make sense. Bella slit her own wrists, but Jacob made her do it with his werewolf emotion moj - no hang on, that's Jasper. It's really hard to keep track of which lame superpower everyone has. Okay, so Jake paid Jasper to make Bella kill herself, and - no. It'll never make sense. (It's exactly like Twilight in that respect.)

Quote :
HE FLIPPED THEM
OFF BECAUSE THEY NEEDED TO FUCKING GROW UP A BRAIN
IN A PLANT POT

Quote :
ALSO, BOYS GOT THE WRONG IDEA ABOUT HER BECAUSE SHE HAD BIG
BOBS
Two large stuffed dolls of Bob the Builder, sellotaped to her chest.
Quote :

UH GUYS I HAVE A
CONFESSION SAID HARRY LOOKING SAD AND EMO I CUT MY WRISTS.
Quote :

SHE RAN AWAY, CRYING AND
CUTTING HER WRISTS. EVERYONE GASPED.
You know in anime, when people run while crying, the teardrops sort of trail out behind them? I'm seeing that, but with blood.

Quote :
Bella was always a really
nice girl, although she had been depressed and no one knew why. It
turns out that Charlie had been abusing and raping her and stuff.
"Yeah, that was a downer."

This can't be serious, can it?
Back to top Go down
EileenK98
Recovering Fanbrat
Recovering Fanbrat
EileenK98


Join date : 2009-06-10
Age : 55
Location : very, very close to Chris

Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter) Empty
PostSubject: Re: Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter)   Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter) EmptySun Jul 19, 2009 7:29 am

Oh dear God, an entire chapter written in all caps. My brain, my brain! Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter) 724940
Back to top Go down
unskilled78
Sporkbender
Sporkbender



Join date : 2009-06-03
Age : 34
Location : a hell of his own creation.

Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter) Empty
PostSubject: Re: Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter)   Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter) EmptySun Jul 19, 2009 12:45 pm

Please can be troll?
Back to top Go down
grmblfjx
Hot and Botherer
Hot and Botherer
grmblfjx


Join date : 2009-06-10

Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter) Empty
PostSubject: Re: Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter)   Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter) EmptySun Jul 19, 2009 1:20 pm

SOUNDS INCREDIBLY MUCH LIKE A TROLL. IS IT ONE OF OURS?



aqua mew wrote:
Quote :
RAWR! BE JEALOS OF MY BIG SMEXY HAIR!!!!!!!!! XD

WE ARE ALL JEALOS!!!!!!!!!! XD

THAT'S NO HAIR
Back to top Go down
Wandering Critic
Sporkbender
Sporkbender



Join date : 2009-06-11

Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter) Empty
PostSubject: Re: Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter)   Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter) EmptySun Jul 19, 2009 3:43 pm

Gotta be a troll.

Not because of the writing, per se (we've seen just as bad, though maybe without the caps) but because of the author's reaction to the reviews. He/she/it is just egging people on.
Back to top Go down
http://wanderingcritic.wordpress.com/
Notomys mordax

Notomys mordax


Join date : 2009-06-03

Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter) Empty
PostSubject: Re: Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter)   Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter) EmptySun Jul 19, 2009 5:49 pm

IF SHE WAS REALLY AN EMO KID/FANBRAT SHE'D KNOW THAT AFI'S TOTALIMMORTAL IS ONE WORD. Trollface
Back to top Go down
Melissa
Sporkbender
Sporkbender
Melissa


Join date : 2009-06-13
Age : 45

Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter) Empty
PostSubject: Re: Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter)   Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter) EmptySun Jul 19, 2009 6:38 pm

When I first saw this, I thought "Please don't be a cutter fic!" It has been nearly five years since my last black out and I don't want to break the streak. However, this fic is so clumsily written that I don't feel the leastthtgfgdsdskwap
.....LOL, J/K.
Back to top Go down
Chaltab
Shitgobbling pissdrinker
Shitgobbling pissdrinker
Chaltab


Join date : 2009-07-19
Age : 36
Location : Outside the middle of nowhere

Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter) Empty
PostSubject: Re: Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter)   Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter) EmptySun Jul 19, 2009 10:20 pm

I'm pretty sure this is a troll, but they do manage some humor. Or at least I thought it was funny. IE:

Quote :
"Man I'm so fucking pissed off," said Harry, starting to smoke some pot. "Want one?" He said, offering Crystle a cigarette.
Back to top Go down
anangrychocobo
Sporkbender
Sporkbender



Join date : 2009-06-13

Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter) Empty
PostSubject: Re: Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter)   Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter) EmptySun Jul 19, 2009 10:54 pm

I'll tell you what this needs. A dramatic reading.
Back to top Go down
Inciter
Sporkbender
Sporkbender
Inciter


Join date : 2009-06-10
Age : 34
Location : My sexual fantasty world

Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter) Empty
PostSubject: Re: Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter)   Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter) EmptySun Jul 19, 2009 10:57 pm

Quote :
"Man I'm so fucking pissed off," said Harry, starting to smoke some pot. "Want one?" He said, offering Crystle a cigarette.
:roflmao:

Quote :
Anyway we all stayed up untill 2:AM, doing drugs, cutting our wrists and listening to all the cool bands that we talked about on the train.
And then they died from a combination of drug overdose and blood loss. The end.

Quote :
EDWARD WAS MAKING OUT WITH HERMIKNIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ah, Hermione's evil twin Hermiknie. I was wondering if she'd appear in this fic.

What an obvious troll. Rolling Eyes
Back to top Go down
Freezer
Epic-Level Pornomancer
Epic-Level Pornomancer
Freezer


Join date : 2009-06-10
Age : 50
Location : Memphis, TN

Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter) Empty
PostSubject: Re: Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter)   Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter) EmptyMon Jul 20, 2009 2:39 am

Quote :
HI PPL MAH NAME IS JADE

HI JADE!

Quote :
I AM FRANKI'S BF LOL.

Good for you, I guess.

Quote :
THE STUPID COMPUTER WONT LET ME CREATE AN ACCOUNT, WE MADE FRIENDS AND NOW SHE LET ME POST MY OWN STORY ON HERE BECAUSE SHE SAYS IT IS GOOD.

Almost as good as mah Inglish!

Quote :
ANYWAY I WRITE IN CAPITALS LOL CAUSE IT MAKES IT STAND OUT LAUGH OUT LOUD.

Not fifty words in and I already want to throttle this twit.

Quote :
BASICALLY BEACSUE I LIKE TO STAND OUT IN A CROWD!!!!1 THAT'S RIGHT. IM SCENE BIOTCHEZ!!!!!!!!!! RAWR! BE JEALOS OF MY BIG SMEXY HAIR!!!!!!!!! XD

Do I really want to know what kind of SUGAHI OMG WAI fanbrat thinks this is amusing?

Quote :
ANYWAY I DECIDED THAT EDWARD IS SEXY AND HARRY IS SEXY SO THIS IS MAH CROSSOVER OH AND ON'T READ IF YOU HATE US EMOS/SCENE KIDS. FLAMES WILL BE LAUGHED AT. JUST REMEMBER THAT HATERS MAKE US FAMOUS XD

Just remember that the person who said "Any publicity is good publicity" was wrong

Quote :
I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT, HARRY POTTER OR ANY OF THE BANDS I MENTION.

Mentioning bands: Fanbrat for "Abandon All Hope..."

Quote :
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Probably the best written lines of the fic.

Quote :
IT WAS THE START OF A NEW YEAR AT HOGWARTS. EDWARD HAD JUST FOUND OUT THAT HE WAS A WIZARD SO HE WAS HAD CHANGED QUITE ALOT.

Edward was the latest bloomer ever.
Quote :

IT TURNS OUT THAT BELLA REALLY LOVED JACOB

She decided she liked her boyfriends less creepy stalkerish.

Quote :
SO SHE HAD RUN OFF WITH HIM BUT THEN HE ABUSED HER AND SHE SLIT HER WRISTS BECAUSE SHE WAS DEPRESSED ABOUT IT.

ALL THIS SHOUTING IS MAKING MY BRAIN HURT!

Quote :
SHE REALISED THAT SHE LOVED EDWARD BUT JACOB MURDERED HER AFTER SHE PHONED HIM TO TELL HIM.

He murdered her over the phone? Neat!

Quote :
THEN JACOB COMMITTED SUICIDE BY SLITTING HIS WRISTS.


Of course, since he's a werewolf, he had to use a chainsaw to be sure.

Quote :
NOW EDWARD WAS ALOT DIFFERENT.

I believe you mentioned that already. Now make with the "How", 'K?

Quote :
HE WAS ALWAYS QUIET AND MOODY. PEOPLE FOUND HIM SPOOKY EVENTHOUGH HE WAS ALWAYS SO HAWT AND ANGSTY XD.

*SMACK* Bad Narrator! No lusting after the Sparklepire!

Quote :
EDWARD HAD DYED HIS HAIR BLACK WITH BLONDE STREAKS AND HIS FRINGE HAD GROWN SO IT FELL MYSTERIOUSLY OVER HIS EYES. HE SPIKED UP THE BACK OF HIS HAIR AND NOW HAS SNAKEBITES.


And we're not supposed to think of him as a weirdo?

Quote :
TODAY, AS HE GOT ON THE TRAIN TO HOGWARTS, HE WAS WEARING A SEXY TIGHT BLACK "AFI" TOP COS THOSES GUYS ARE SO SEXAH! (A.N: EDWARD IS BI.)

Oh course he is. Rolling Eyes

Quote :
AND BLACK SKINNY JEANS WITH A STUDDED BELT WITH A SKULL AND WITH CHECKED CONVERSE. HE SAW SOME GIRLS SQEAL AT HIS HAWTNESS WORDS WORDS OMG WORDS!

Asylum Freezer-Vision!

Quote :
THE GIRL WAS ONE OF HIS RARE FRIENDS. SHE WAS DEPRESSED TOO AND WAS VERY VERY PRETTY. HER NAME WAS CRYSTLE HAVOK

Of the Birmingham Havoks.

Quote :
(SHE WAS HIS DAVEY HAVOK FROM AFI'S COUSIN)

I don't know who that is. Nor do I care. Moving on...

Quote :
SHE HAD LONG BLACK AND BLONDE SCENE HAIR WITH BLUE STREAKS AND MATCHING, SPARKLING BLUE EYES. SHE HAD WHITE FLAWLESS SKIN (SHE IS A VAMPIRE)

Well of course she is! Rolling Eyes

Okay, let's hit the fast forward and see if we can find some actually Harry Potter characters.

Quote :
WORDSWORDSWORDSWORDS...

"HI," SAID THE BOY WITH BLACK HAIR (HE LOOKED KINDA LIKE GERARD WAY) "CAN WE SIT HERE? EVERYWHERE ELSE IS FULL."

I must assume she's talking about Book!Harry, because A) Dan Radcliffe looks nothing like Gerard Way and B) Radcliffe has brown hair.

Quote :
"YEAH WHATEVER," SAID EDWARD, NOT REALLY LISTENING.#

"HEY GIRL, WHAT'S YOUR NAME?" HERMIONIE ASKED CRYSTLE.

"IM CRYSTLE SHE REPLIES.

Of the Highland Replies.

Quote :
COOL LOL. MY NAME IS HERMIONIE" SHE LOOKED MAD, I FUCKING HATE THAT NAME.

Um... Okay?

Quote :
I'M HARRY SAID HARRY.

IM RON REPLIED RON!"

I'm Bored replied Bored, er... Freezer
Back to top Go down
http://freezer.livejournal.com
Misscripted

Misscripted


Join date : 2009-07-16
Location : Middle of Nowhere

Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter) Empty
PostSubject: Re: Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter)   Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter) EmptyMon Jul 20, 2009 3:51 pm

Quote :
RAWR SHE SAID TO CHEER EDWARD UPHE SMILED FAINTLY.

Yes, because saying "RAWR" is the best way to cheer someone up.

I suppose everyone's supposed to be scene in this story? The next paragraph makes my brain hurt with all of the character alterations.

Seriously? I hope this is a troll.
Back to top Go down
Rabid Badger
And This is Why I Need Medication
And This is Why I Need Medication
Rabid Badger


Join date : 2009-06-10

Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter) Empty
PostSubject: Re: Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter)   Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter) EmptyMon Jul 20, 2009 6:55 pm

I'm still waiting for the author to explain how Edward could slit his wrists. And what good it would do, since he's DEAD AND HAS NO BLOOD IN HIS BODY!

Sorry, the author's shouting gets to you after a while.
Back to top Go down
Zoe

Zoe


Join date : 2009-07-22
Location : Standing firm on the Shield

Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter) Empty
PostSubject: Re: Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter)   Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter) EmptyWed Jul 22, 2009 11:38 pm

Quote :
Harry looked like he was thinking for a moment and suddenly he burst out. "I WAS DEPRESSED BY VOLDEMORT!!!!!!!!!!!"

I gasped.

Sweet Eru, what a plot twist! :shocked:
Back to top Go down
rachel
Sporkbender
Sporkbender
rachel


Join date : 2009-07-19

Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter) Empty
PostSubject: Re: Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter)   Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter) EmptyThu Jul 23, 2009 4:51 am

Quote :
"CRYSTLE! (See? I got it right that time and she is not a Mary Sue!)
No, really? Is that why her name rhymes with "gristle?"
Back to top Go down
Sponsored content





Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter) Empty
PostSubject: Re: Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter)   Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter) Empty

Back to top Go down
 
Their poisoned love and our bleeding eyes (TwilightXHarry Potter)
Back to top 
Page 1 of 1
 Similar topics
-
» Marty Stu/Harry Potter bamfs to Middle-Earth using the Dragonballs: from the creator of Rose Potter!
» Harry Potter becomes Neo-Nazi
» Squad Broken? More like HADOUKEN MY WRISTS AND SHORYUKEN MY EYES.
» For Your Eyes Only: Naruto Hermaphrodite Shouta Furry MPreg Porn!
» Heero Potter

Permissions in this forum:You cannot reply to topics in this forum
Why God, Why? :: The Sporking Table :: New Releases-
Jump to: