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 Transformers ROTF The MST

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Harley Quinn hyenaholic
KGarrett
Penguin
Root Admin
Lysander
theweirdkind
Lapin
Melissa
KelinciHutan
Miss Prince
Mae Bedlam
Psy-4
Maximilia
anangrychocobo
DarthDarthington
Aggie
Cyberwulf
Rabid Badger
Snake Bandage
Ratchetmon
A_Note_Chaotic
Freezer
Alana
unskilled78
InkWeaver
Narwhal
Manny
Somath Cegem
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Alana

Alana


Join date : 2009-06-11
Age : 34
Location : Missouri

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PostSubject: Re: Transformers ROTF The MST   Transformers ROTF The MST - Page 4 EmptySun Jul 12, 2009 11:20 pm

So, who else boggled at the Leo=hispanic=Raoul thing Wulfy kicked up?

Seriously, Raoul was kickass, funny, smart, and generally a good kid, carjacking aside. A pretty great character for G1-- far better than a lot of the humans in 80s cartoons/TF series. Leo was sometimes-funny, and I didn't even notice he was supposed to be anything more than a horny college boy being horny and in college. Not much alike at all. (Though I would fully support it if Movieverse decided it needed a Tracks. Even though he makes fun of upper-class ivy league-schooled snooty New Englanders. RACISM!)

Next, let's talk about the Italian guy working at a deli. RACISM!
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Psy-4
Armbiter of Good Fanfiction
Armbiter of Good Fanfiction



Join date : 2009-06-10

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PostSubject: Re: Transformers ROTF The MST   Transformers ROTF The MST - Page 4 EmptySun Jul 12, 2009 11:51 pm

Alana wrote:
So, who else boggled at the Leo=hispanic=Raoul thing Wulfy kicked up?
At that point it was clear that if you cut Cyberwulf, she would bleed White Guilt.
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Melissa
Sporkbender
Sporkbender
Melissa


Join date : 2009-06-13
Age : 45

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PostSubject: Re: Transformers ROTF The MST   Transformers ROTF The MST - Page 4 EmptyMon Jul 13, 2009 9:37 pm

Other than the technical difficulties I had mentioned, it was a pretty good movie. It had lots of shit blowing up, as Michael Bay movies always do. I liked that they didn't juggle a dozen or so story lines like in the last movie. I expected that they would focus mostly on already established characters. I thought the chichuahua was cute.

Now, I will save Wulfie some trouble by insulting the above for her.
You fucking dumbass! How can you say the movie was pretty good and then say it had shit blowing up? I guess you'd like EVERYTHING to blow up? Wouldn't you, you fucking cunt! Cunt, by the way, is a sexist term that no one should use on anybody, but I'll make an exception for you! What's the matter? Are you just too stupid to follow more than one story line? You weren't bitching about Arcee not having a bigger role, so therefor I can safely conclude you are a sexist piece of shit! You thought the chihuahua was cute? What about the pug? You're just a breedist idiot if you don't think pugs are cute!
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Psy-4
Armbiter of Good Fanfiction
Armbiter of Good Fanfiction



Join date : 2009-06-10

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PostSubject: Re: Transformers ROTF The MST   Transformers ROTF The MST - Page 4 EmptyMon Jul 13, 2009 10:06 pm

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Mae Bedlam
Sporkbender
Sporkbender
Mae Bedlam


Join date : 2009-06-10
Age : 36
Location : The Coney Island Disco Palace

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PostSubject: Re: Transformers ROTF The MST   Transformers ROTF The MST - Page 4 EmptyTue Jul 14, 2009 8:33 am

And you wonder why you're considered the most ignorant poster. Jesus Chris91.
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Lysander
Armbiter of Good Fanfiction
Armbiter of Good Fanfiction
Lysander


Join date : 2009-06-10

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PostSubject: Re: Transformers ROTF The MST   Transformers ROTF The MST - Page 4 EmptyTue Jul 14, 2009 9:12 am

I stole this movie from the Internet. I still walked out after twenty minutes.

Michael Bay is the God-Emperor of Shit.
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Melissa
Sporkbender
Sporkbender
Melissa


Join date : 2009-06-13
Age : 45

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PostSubject: Re: Transformers ROTF The MST   Transformers ROTF The MST - Page 4 EmptyTue Jul 14, 2009 10:43 am

Mae Bedlam wrote:
And you wonder why you're considered the most ignorant poster. Jesus Chris91.

I'm sorry. I keep forgetting people can say anything they like about me
but god forbid I say anything about anyone else. From now, on all my
words will be sugar and spice and all that's nice. I'll just lay over
here with the word "Welcome" tattooed to my back. Or should I hang
myself up and have the word "Everlast" tattooed to my back? I only
exist to please, you know.
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Cyberwulf
NO NOT THE BEEEEES
NO NOT THE BEEEEES
Cyberwulf


Join date : 2009-06-03
Age : 42
Location : TRILOBITE!

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PostSubject: Re: Transformers ROTF The MST   Transformers ROTF The MST - Page 4 EmptyTue Jul 14, 2009 11:24 am

Melissa wrote:

I'm sorry. I keep forgetting people can say anything they like about me
but god forbid I say anything about anyone else. From now, on all my
words will be sugar and spice and all that's nice. I'll just lay over
here with the word "Welcome" tattooed to my back. Or should I hang
myself up and have the word "Everlast" tattooed to my back? I only
exist to please, you know.
OH TOUGHEN THE FUCK UP, WOULD YOU.

I've told you before - this place where you can vomit out whatever refuckulous idea pops into your brain and everyone treats it like a nugget of pure wisdom from the glorious arse of King Solomon himself and nobody disagrees or tells you it's stupid does not exist. People say all kinds of shit about me and to me and you don't see me stapling my hand to my forehead and whining self-pityingly.

This is an opinion board of incredibly diverse members, none of whom agree on everything. Get used to it.
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Mae Bedlam
Sporkbender
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Mae Bedlam


Join date : 2009-06-10
Age : 36
Location : The Coney Island Disco Palace

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PostSubject: Re: Transformers ROTF The MST   Transformers ROTF The MST - Page 4 EmptyTue Jul 14, 2009 12:07 pm

Melissa wrote:
Transformers ROTF The MST - Page 4 896582

PROTIP: The more defensive you get about it, the more you prove my point.
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Melissa
Sporkbender
Sporkbender
Melissa


Join date : 2009-06-13
Age : 45

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PostSubject: Re: Transformers ROTF The MST   Transformers ROTF The MST - Page 4 EmptyTue Jul 14, 2009 1:23 pm

Cyberwulf wrote:
People say all kinds of shit about me and to me and you don't see me stapling my hand to my forehead and whining self-pityingly.
You know you'll go to Hell for lying, right?
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Root Admin
Administrator
Administrator
Root Admin


Join date : 2009-06-03
Age : 35
Location : 997

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PostSubject: Re: Transformers ROTF The MST   Transformers ROTF The MST - Page 4 EmptyTue Jul 14, 2009 1:32 pm

Melissa wrote:
Cyberwulf wrote:
People say all kinds of shit about me and to me and you don't see me stapling my hand to my forehead and whining self-pityingly.
You know you'll go to Hell for lying, right?

Melissa, your keyboard is typing. Might want to get it checked. :eng101:
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anangrychocobo
Sporkbender
Sporkbender



Join date : 2009-06-13

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PostSubject: Re: Transformers ROTF The MST   Transformers ROTF The MST - Page 4 EmptyWed Jul 15, 2009 11:15 am

REFUCKULOUS COCKOSITY DOUCHEWEASEL COCKBUCKET DICKDOUCHETARD JUMPING CHOCOLATE JESUS BALLS

"Creative" swearing on the internet is getting pretty tiresome.
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Penguin
NO NOT THE BEEEEES
NO NOT THE BEEEEES
Penguin


Join date : 2009-07-18
Location : Wild Gray Yonder

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PostSubject: Re: Transformers ROTF The MST   Transformers ROTF The MST - Page 4 EmptySun Jul 19, 2009 12:30 am

Transformers 2 ROTFlcopter has to have been the worst movie I've ever seen. And I've seen some stinkers.'

Here's why:

1.) Sam goes to college. Mikaela decides to give up any shot at an education to have sex with motorcycles for her leering coworkers, which somehow keeps her "manchild" dad out of trouble.

2.) Sam's parents are the most annoying characters in the movie. You'd think they wouldn't be in it when Sam goes to college and then around the world and shit, but no. THEY. NEVER. GO. AWAY. By the time they showed up seemingly out of the blue in Jordan (missed the capture scene) I was clawing at my own face, screaming "WHYYYYY? WHY ARE THEY HEEEERE?!"

3.) Speaking of WHY ARE THEY HEEEERE, what the FUCK does Sam's roommate have to do with ANYTHING?

4.) Decepticon seduction ploy. Very clever of the baddies, enrolling a prostibot in Sam's school which then attempts to kill him for no apparent reason.

5.) Can we just admit that the US military is completely irrelevant in this movie? I don't think they succeed in scuffing the paint of a Transformer in this movie, it's like we're in it just so Michael Bay can jerk off to B-1 carpet bombings, which Sam is mostly immune to. It's like they exist to die while the robots blow up half the world.

6.) Why is the existence of the Transformers covered up after they pretty much showed themselves to EVERYONE ON THE PLANET in the first one?

7.) No matter how many times they have Megan Fox running towards the camera, it will never make up for the shitfest that is this movie.

8.) Farting, vomiting robots. ROBOTS WITH WRECKING BALL TESTICLES. LEG-HUMPING ROBOTS COME ON WHAT THE FUCK

9.) WHY DOES MOST OF THIS MOVIE EXIST ARRRGH

10.) I didn't pay for this movie and I want my money back.
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Lysander
Armbiter of Good Fanfiction
Armbiter of Good Fanfiction
Lysander


Join date : 2009-06-10

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PostSubject: Re: Transformers ROTF The MST   Transformers ROTF The MST - Page 4 EmptySun Jul 19, 2009 12:36 am

Penguin wrote:
Decepticon seduction ploy. Very clever of the baddies, enrolling a prostibot in Sam's school which then attempts to kill him for no apparent reason.

Yeah, what the fuck was that about? Are the Decepticons subcontracting out to the Cylons now, or something?
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KGarrett
Sporkbender
Sporkbender
KGarrett


Join date : 2009-07-07
Age : 1013
Location : New York, aka the most boring state there is.

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PostSubject: Re: Transformers ROTF The MST   Transformers ROTF The MST - Page 4 EmptySun Jul 19, 2009 12:40 am

Knowing Michael Bay, would you really be surprised?
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Penguin
NO NOT THE BEEEEES
NO NOT THE BEEEEES
Penguin


Join date : 2009-07-18
Location : Wild Gray Yonder

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PostSubject: Re: Transformers ROTF The MST   Transformers ROTF The MST - Page 4 EmptySun Jul 19, 2009 12:49 am

I don't know. Fortunately, there's a hilarious FAQ here.

Some highlights:

Quote :
What is the status of the Transformers at the beginning of the film?
The Autobots have joined the military to hunt down the Decepticons. We're told the Decepticons are "doing things," but they appear to be hiding peacefully when the Autobots show up and brutally murder them.

What?
Yeah.
The Decepticons aren't apparently doing anything, then the Autobots show up, the Decepticons run for their goddamn lives, and the Autobots hunt them down and brutally murder them. It's kind of weird.

Quote :
How is Sam Witwicky dragged back into the fight?
Well, he finds a fragment of the Allspark shard. You know, the Allspark that he spent all last movie being told he shouldn't give to Megatron, but when he gave it to Megatron, it killed Megatron. That one. Anyways, the shard makes the Beef see symbols and act like more of an spaz than usual.

So the Decepticons want the shard? Why?
Uh... to bring Megatron back to life?

What?
That's what they said.

But the Allspark killed Megatron in the first movie.
Yes.

...and now it can also bring him back to life.
It's very powerful, this Allspark.

Quote :
So Turturro translates the symbols.
No, that would be silly.
He does, in an incredibly bizarre series of connect-the-dots, lead them to Jetfire, an elderly and deceased Transformers whose corpse is hanging out in the Air & Space Museum.

What good is he dead?!
Ah! Remember the shard? Sam uses it to bring Jetfire back to life!

Not Optimus?
No!
This way, Sam can get the symbols translated... so he can, er... find the ancient machine... that can, uh... possibly bring Optimus back to life.

Quote :
Hold on. That's what the Matrix of Leadership does in the movie?
Yes. Works the sun-exploding machine.

I'm fuzzy on how "Leadership" covers that.
I didn't name it. But it does sound a little nicer than "Matrix of Blowing Up the Goddamn Sun."

Quote :
Can you explain Megan Fox's appeal?
Yes. She looks like a porn star and has the same acting talent as one, yet for some reason she makes mainstream movies. This tonal disconnect is what's so appealing about her.
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Harley Quinn hyenaholic
Knight of the Bleach
Knight of the Bleach
Harley Quinn hyenaholic


Join date : 2009-06-12
Age : 38
Location : Taking that picture...

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PostSubject: Re: Transformers ROTF The MST   Transformers ROTF The MST - Page 4 EmptySun Jul 19, 2009 5:09 am

Michael Bay did not make a good Transformers movie, but for many reasons, including body fluid jokes, racial stereotypes, broken promises about character development and Megan Fox. Then calling it "good clean family fun".

I have worked out why Transformers will never make a good Live-Action movie. It's actually remarkably simple, and we're probably all been thinking it, but I found the right words.

The thing is, for a movie to be Live Action, it inevitably requires a large human presence. Otherwise you might as well pull off a full-length CGI movie. Which probably would have been a considerably improvement.

Unfortunately, if you watch any episode of Transformers - even G1 Season One, which takes place almost entirely on Earth - you'll notice that about half the episode has large parts where there are no humans on the screen at all. The robots are standing around talking to each other without a human in sight. And amazingly, they aren't always blowing things up while they do that. Humans show up occasionally to be surprised at the presence of giant robots, or to give them a little information on human culture. And that's Season One, which takes place on Earth. Move onto later G1 seasons that go into space and there's considerably less humans around.

To pull this off in Live Action would require pointing a camera at an empty set for about half the movie. Later they'd superimpose the CGI robots, which kinda defeats the purpose of Live Action.

Bay managed the same time for all-robot-scenes - about 15 minutes - but forgot to get the ratio right. Robots are the sidekicks - and it isn't made any better by Optimus Prime being unable to kick Megatron's ass, but Sam doing it. Almost all the scenes with robots in have humans. Many of the scenes with robots have them conveniently in alt mode. There are very few scenes consisting entirely of robots, and they're very short.

Ultimately, Transformers doesn't have a large enough human presence to make a Live Action movie. But Michael Bay apparently said "Fuck that, we'll just decrease the robot time and increase the human time. Nobody will notice." Trouble is that most of the people who went to the movie went because they're Transformers Fans. This was your target audience. NOT people who laugh at robot genitals. NOT little kids. NOT action film fanatics. NOT romantic-drama fans. Transformers fans were your audience, and 75% of the reason you missed that audience is because a Live Action Film needs humans, and the franchise of Transformers does not.
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Cyberwulf
NO NOT THE BEEEEES
NO NOT THE BEEEEES
Cyberwulf


Join date : 2009-06-03
Age : 42
Location : TRILOBITE!

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PostSubject: Re: Transformers ROTF The MST   Transformers ROTF The MST - Page 4 EmptySun Jul 19, 2009 2:50 pm

Harley Quinn hyenaholic wrote:
Ultimately, Transformers doesn't have a large enough human presence to make a Live Action movie. But Michael Bay apparently said "Fuck that, we'll just decrease the robot time and increase the human time. Nobody will notice."
Actually, I think Michael Bay just said "FUCK IT EXPLOSIONS EVERYWHERE WITH LOTS OF ARMY MEN AND AWESOME MILITARY HARDWARE TO JACK MY HOT SPICY BONER TO WOOOOOOOOOOOO"
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Harley Quinn hyenaholic
Knight of the Bleach
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Harley Quinn hyenaholic


Join date : 2009-06-12
Age : 38
Location : Taking that picture...

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PostSubject: Re: Transformers ROTF The MST   Transformers ROTF The MST - Page 4 EmptySun Jul 19, 2009 3:49 pm

Also true. Michael Bay apparently likes explosions more than he likes plot.
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Penguin
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Penguin


Join date : 2009-07-18
Location : Wild Gray Yonder

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PostSubject: Re: Transformers ROTF The MST   Transformers ROTF The MST - Page 4 EmptySun Jul 19, 2009 3:55 pm

He also pops a stiffy any time military hardware comes on-screen. This is why the Transformers get so little screen time: Most of them are still just generic GM automobiles without any sort of gun or remotely military application until they turn biped-shaped and shoot things.
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Harley Quinn hyenaholic
Knight of the Bleach
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Harley Quinn hyenaholic


Join date : 2009-06-12
Age : 38
Location : Taking that picture...

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PostSubject: Re: Transformers ROTF The MST   Transformers ROTF The MST - Page 4 EmptySun Jul 19, 2009 4:39 pm

Every time I look at ROTF I think of Rolling On The Floor.

Hmmm... I think this marks the end of an era for CGI. Bay has, through his arrogance, shown us that there is only so much you can do with CGI. That no matter how good a movie's special effects are, they are still not a replacement for plot.

Not that CGI won't continue to be used, of course, but people are going to realise that Special Effects aren't quite as important as we thought.
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gaijinguy
Shitgobbling pissdrinker
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Join date : 2009-06-10
Location : Assuming a spherical frictionless cow

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PostSubject: Re: Transformers ROTF The MST   Transformers ROTF The MST - Page 4 EmptySun Jul 19, 2009 8:24 pm

Harley Quinn hyenaholic wrote:
Every time I look at ROTF I think of Rolling On The Floor.

Hmmm... I think this marks the end of an era for CGI. Bay has, through his arrogance, shown us that there is only so much you can do with CGI. That no matter how good a movie's special effects are, they are still not a replacement for plot.

Not that CGI won't continue to be used, of course, but people are going to realise that Special Effects aren't quite as important as we thought.

Three words: Star Wars Prequels. If that didn't teach Hollywood that CGI doesn't replace all other story elements, they aren't going to learn.
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Chaltab
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Chaltab


Join date : 2009-07-19
Age : 36
Location : Outside the middle of nowhere

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PostSubject: Re: Transformers ROTF The MST   Transformers ROTF The MST - Page 4 EmptySun Jul 19, 2009 10:35 pm

Well the Star Wars prequels were telling an interesting story, fall of a great republic and all, the problem was the dialogue and acting were garbage.

Transformers doesn't even have that to its credit.
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Harley Quinn hyenaholic
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Join date : 2009-06-12
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PostSubject: Re: Transformers ROTF The MST   Transformers ROTF The MST - Page 4 EmptyMon Jul 20, 2009 5:00 am

Yeah, Bay was relying on the success of the franchise to make the film a success. He wasn't a fan of Transformers or he would have understood that he didn't have the robots talking TO EACH OTHER enough.

He would have understood that Transformers fans don't NEED to have genders explained to them. And that Transformers fans don't want to hear about a human romance, but a robot romance is okay.

You know, for the third one he's contemplating using Unicron. The problem there is that he insists that his robots must find room for every piece, which is all very well, but when it comes to robots big enough to devour a planet... well, Unicron had enough scale issues with scenes with other robots when he was ANIMATED.
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gaijinguy
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PostSubject: Re: Transformers ROTF The MST   Transformers ROTF The MST - Page 4 EmptyMon Jul 20, 2009 6:20 am

Chaltab wrote:
Well the Star Wars prequels were telling an interesting story, fall of a great republic and all, the problem was the dialogue and acting were garbage.

Transformers doesn't even have that to its credit.

I'd disagree. The tale of the prequels was that of the Sith takeover of the Republic and their. . . um. . . army of cloned slaves they use as cannon fodder? scratch Remind me, why exactly are we supposed to be on their side? Maybe it works as a shaggy dog story ("you know that great Old Republic? Yeah. . . not so much with the greatness") but otherwise, it's just sort of there.

Besides, RotF is still doing good business. Hollywood's not going to learn anything from a movie that makes that much money, however negative the reviews are.
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