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 THE HUEMN CENIPED 2: THE HUMEN MILIPEDE

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emilyd47



Join date : 2010-08-09

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PostSubject: THE HUEMN CENIPED 2: THE HUMEN MILIPEDE   THE HUEMN CENIPED 2: THE HUMEN MILIPEDE EmptyTue Aug 17, 2010 11:01 pm

I trust you are all familiar with the film "The Human Centipede", or at least its basic premise, but the author of this fanfiction may not be.

THE HUEMN CENIPED 2: THE HUMEN MILIPEDE

Quote :
Doktor scientist got oot of poop water becuz he wasntnot reely dead by only trick to fools police.

Nice, a Freudian slip in the very first line. Also, "wasntnot"? Please make up your mind.

Quote :
"Now I are will create the humen miliped!" He inventioned. Time was goin n work was flyin when eh needed onyly 1 thing left: the pure tearz of the true milipeed.

I'm no biologist, let alone a Doktor Scientist, but I don't think millipedes even have tear glands. Then again, people firmly insisted that all swans were white before they discovered black swans, so it could be that all the millipedes we have found so far are not true milipeeds.

Quote :
But not have ther so went to market plase.

How convenient. The milipeed tearz are in the same aisle as the unicorn blood, I guess. But there's a catch-- the vendor won't sell it because he's evil! But don't worry, our hero won't let a little thing like that stop him:

Quote :
So Doktor scientis did daily quest to get hid rep up to essalted and buy anyway.

Back at ta hom he finnish the humen mllipede. "IT WARKS!" He sheouted.

"Oh no we are humen!" Said milipeeeds.

"Oh no we are millipeds!" Said humens.

This sounds like some kind of body swap. I don't think that's how the human centipede worked... But never mind, here comes another plot twist!

Quote :
Then door.

"I will ansver da door." Doktor sicentist went open door and see it id Men in Black.

Apparently Men in Black are one entity now-- did the Doktor stitch them together when the narrator wasn't looking?

...I'll stop here. The fic doesn't become any more comprehensible.
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Happenstance
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Happenstance

Join date : 2009-11-27
Location : 221B

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PostSubject: Re: THE HUEMN CENIPED 2: THE HUMEN MILIPEDE   THE HUEMN CENIPED 2: THE HUMEN MILIPEDE EmptyWed Aug 18, 2010 12:36 am

Lolwut! :D

That was...whoa.
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Dixie
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Dixie

Join date : 2009-06-12
Location : London, UK

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PostSubject: Re: THE HUEMN CENIPED 2: THE HUMEN MILIPEDE   THE HUEMN CENIPED 2: THE HUMEN MILIPEDE EmptyWed Aug 18, 2010 3:45 am

Meh... Obvious troll trying too hard.
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XLT-100852.0
Sporkbender
Sporkbender
XLT-100852.0

Join date : 2010-07-18
Age : 28
Location : interwebs

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PostSubject: Re: THE HUEMN CENIPED 2: THE HUMEN MILIPEDE   THE HUEMN CENIPED 2: THE HUMEN MILIPEDE EmptyWed Aug 18, 2010 5:00 am

This is not the place to promote your shitty troll fic.
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Vanilla-villa
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Vanilla-villa

Join date : 2010-04-19
Location : England

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PostSubject: Re: THE HUEMN CENIPED 2: THE HUMEN MILIPEDE   THE HUEMN CENIPED 2: THE HUMEN MILIPEDE EmptyWed Aug 18, 2010 5:38 am

Quote :
Author: Sue Mary
The trolls don't even try anymore ._.
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EileenK98
Recovering Fanbrat
Recovering Fanbrat
EileenK98

Join date : 2009-06-10
Age : 52
Location : very, very close to Chris

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PostSubject: Re: THE HUEMN CENIPED 2: THE HUMEN MILIPEDE   THE HUEMN CENIPED 2: THE HUMEN MILIPEDE EmptyWed Aug 18, 2010 6:04 am

Quote :
author: Sue Mary

Quote :
genre: Horror/Parody


Obvious troll is indeed obvious. Sorry, try again.
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Seule
My Mescaline
My Mescaline
Seule

Join date : 2009-06-11
Age : 28
Location : Tea & Castle Land

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PostSubject: Re: THE HUEMN CENIPED 2: THE HUMEN MILIPEDE   THE HUEMN CENIPED 2: THE HUMEN MILIPEDE EmptyWed Aug 18, 2010 8:04 am

Quote :
"IT WARKS!" He sheouted.

"Oh no we are humen!" Said milipeeeds.

"Oh no we are millipeds!" Said humens.


These are my three new favourite quotes.
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Exodia's Right Leg
Shitgobbling pissdrinker
Shitgobbling pissdrinker
Exodia's Right Leg

Join date : 2009-08-04
Age : 34
Location : Niggertown, HUAHUEHUAland

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PostSubject: Re: THE HUEMN CENIPED 2: THE HUMEN MILIPEDE   THE HUEMN CENIPED 2: THE HUMEN MILIPEDE EmptyWed Aug 18, 2010 9:45 am

C'mon, at least be original with your intentional typos. "Humens" was used on Peter Chimaera's "FLC: Free Man".
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Pengwolf



Join date : 2010-08-09

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PostSubject: Re: THE HUEMN CENIPED 2: THE HUMEN MILIPEDE   THE HUEMN CENIPED 2: THE HUMEN MILIPEDE EmptyWed Aug 18, 2010 9:58 am

That was Squirrelking, not Peter Chimaera.

At any rate I don't see why this got so much love from TvTropes. It's not much longer than something by Hans von Hozel and doesn't even look like it took much effort or thought.

Is it just the idea of Human Centipede fanfic existing?
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EileenK98
Recovering Fanbrat
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EileenK98

Join date : 2009-06-10
Age : 52
Location : very, very close to Chris

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PostSubject: Re: THE HUEMN CENIPED 2: THE HUMEN MILIPEDE   THE HUEMN CENIPED 2: THE HUMEN MILIPEDE EmptyWed Aug 18, 2010 3:40 pm

Let's look at some of her other fics, shall we?

Quote :
2. STAR WARS: YODA'S QUEST reviews
Anakin is taken bondage by Dark Vader and Yoda must safe him but can he? WARNIN IS VERY ADULT THEMES WIF A SAD ENNIN!

Setting aside the fact that Anakin IS Dark -- I mean Darth Vader, this can't be too bad, can it?

Quote :
Yodur was at da club drinkin bear and doin it wif hot alien babes wen he got a call on his spacesellfone form Anarin who sayd "YOA HELP VADOR HAS KIDAPPED ME!"

I stand corrected.

How do you fit a bear in a blender? And what is a "spacesellfone"?


Quote :
Ull naver get aways with this, Dark Vader!" Anakin said in his prizxon sell on death store. "No I will cuz I haf ylou kidnapped an none can safety u." Dark Vaser went laff like HAHAHAHAHAHA becuz we was winnin! Meenwhile Yoda was goin in space traffik when his shiip got a rival gangerster challenge for a rase an as da gang lear of da jedis he hads to assept.

You know, it takes real work to spell this badly. I tried to do it for a little piece I wrote, and my inner editor was screaming for mercy by the end of it.
Death store? Is that a place that sells cool weapons and stuff?

Quote :
Da rase wasnt lnog becuz Yoga used the farce to go faster than da otter guy. "Hay! I am much teh faster than u." An Yodo popped a cap in da guy's butt lol. There wuz a huge spaceshipcr ash that bocked hes way an other probem 2 in form of shoot outr! Rivral gnag had loss of guns and lite-saberz an 1 of dem had a hossage!

Okay, this is starting to hurt my brain. Let's just skip to the end:

Quote :
"DYE!" He did a kapenahamenHA and bowed up da deth star an all da bad guyz and Al Captain and Dark Visor 2 so dere wut a party for him by all da otter jetis. But Yodan wast happy becuz he had falled and Anakin was ded.


THE HUEMN CENIPED 2: THE HUMEN MILIPEDE 724940
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Toastuh
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Toastuh

Join date : 2009-07-12

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PostSubject: Re: THE HUEMN CENIPED 2: THE HUMEN MILIPEDE   THE HUEMN CENIPED 2: THE HUMEN MILIPEDE EmptyWed Aug 18, 2010 9:26 pm

I am almost 100 percent sure that this is a troll. An obvious one (Sue Mary? In the 'Lilo and Stitch' category? HUMENS?), but hilarious. Very Peter Chimaera-esque.

Best lines IMO:

Quote :
"Oh no we are humen!" Said milipeeeds.

"Oh no we are millipeds!" Said humens. Then door.

THEN WHO WAS DOO-okay never mind.

Quote :
"GLACIER RETREAT!" And teh Men in Black explodd and died after words.

"Good jub my humen milpede!" Doktor Scientist congratulashuned. So they movinged to Hayee wif Liio and Sitch to go with board surfing and Doktor golt ideans for an experiment centipede maybe seekwill crossvover wif Lilo and Stitch in futer?

I wish the real Human Centipede had gone like this. Doctor Heiter would have a voice like BAMAN from BAMAN PIDERMAN and would be flopping all over and the people would be taped together with duct tape.
And then everybody would get cookies.
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PostSubject: Re: THE HUEMN CENIPED 2: THE HUMEN MILIPEDE   THE HUEMN CENIPED 2: THE HUMEN MILIPEDE Empty

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