UK Foreign Office Apologises to Pope for Internal Memo

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An internal Foreign Office memo about this September's papal visit to Britain which started as a Friday afternoon joke, today has resulted in a formal government apology to the Vatican.

Suggested... he might like to "start a helpline for abused children"...

...sack "dodgy" bishops, open an abortion ward, launch his own brand of condoms, preside at a civil partnership, perform forward rolls with children, apologise for the Spanish armada and sing a song with the Queen.

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In a statement, the Foreign Office said: "This is clearly a foolish document that does not in any way reflect UK government or Foreign Office policy or views. Many of the ideas … are clearly ill-judged, naive and disrespectful. The text was not cleared, or shown to ministers or senior officials before circulation. As soon as senior officials became aware of the document it was withdrawn from circulation. The individual responsible has been transferred to other duties. He has been told orally and in writing that this was a serious error of judgment and has accepted this view."

The civil servant responsible, said to be in his 20s, appears to have written the document on a Friday in early March, some weeks before the latest waves of child abuse accusations engulfed the Catholic church, which has indeed resulted in the departure of several bishops, including two this weekend, in Ireland and Belgium. Among the memo's other suggestions were that the now-Catholic Tony Blair and the singer Susan Boyle might be suitable candidates to be introduced to the pope, while the aggressive atheist Richard Dawkins and Wayne Rooney – who married in a Catholic ceremony – might be less suitable.

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The ludicrous nature of the suggestions did not prevent some within the Catholic church reacting to what they claimed was a disrespectful slur, demanding apologies that many senior Vatican officials have in recent weeks declined to offer children abused in church care.

Oh, come on.[quote]

They're really grasping as straws if they're trying to make themselves look like victims.

That memo is awesome.

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The ludicrous nature of some of the memo's suggestions did not prevent
some within the Catholic church demanding apologies for a disrespectful
slur rather more urgently than senior Vatican officials have offered
apologies over children abused in church care.

Says it all really.