Yvette's Bridal Formal

If I ever visit Panama City, I think I'll check that shop out. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

Maybe the climate doesn't agree with her?

Nihilist wrote:

I can see they were trying to go for the Sixteen Magazine feel, with that cut-and-paste collage and bright colors....

Fuck, you mean someone made it look like this on purpose?

KelinciHutan, it was me who e-mailed the web mistress. No response.

If someone calls and gets a reply...we can has recap, please?

Also, if any WGWers live near Panama City, how about a drive-by? I've done enough research on this eye-searing atrocity to know that yes, it is a real bridal shop, and a rather unassuming looking one from the outside.

[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.]

That is a link to a pretty positive review of the shop.

[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.]

And creepy man- his name is Sean B.- has given his own place a good review on Yelp.

Achtung Baby wrote:

And creepy man- his name is Sean B.- has given his own place a good review on Yelp.

I love how he doesn't even try to hide it, either.

Also THE TILDES, THEY BURN

Notice on one of those pages it says "Yvette's has a passion for fashion." Isn't it obvious? The website design was obviously done by a Bratz doll. It explains so much.

Ho-lee crap, it's like the website for ANTIGUA: The Land of Fairies Wizards and Heroes (Part 1), only a thousand times worse.

I particularly 'like' that picture near the bottom of the girl with multicoloured energy beams shooting out of her tiara. Evidently that tiara is a magic item that casts Prismatic Spray 3/day.

Verandering wrote:

Delcat wrote:

Dr. Professor Science wrote:

... Hot mess?

Hot tranny mess.

...

*cough* Forget sometimes not everyone reads Achewood, sorry.

I, uh... oh god wtf. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

I didn't even know websites COULD be made that bad. It's like some horrid form of modern art. Like she STRATEGICALLY placed every brightly-colored link, every horribly-artificed photograph in such a way that it would cause the greatest pain to the viewer's eyes. You cannot convince me that any of this was done on accident. Personally, I think the polka music adds a nice touch to that page with the bouncing stick men. It's like she's saying, "BEHOLD! Every horrible thing that could ever been done to a website ever! I have achieved web-designing Nirvana!"

Also, I may have found the most profound page on the entire website. It's the green MS Paint squares, I think. I also can't help kinda rockin' out to the snazzy Indian music on this page.

There's a fine line between colorful and garish, and Yvette's pole-vaulted over it.

Yes, Chris, well done. What a useful and contributory comment.

Resurrecting a dead thread with this rather enlightening Yahoo answers page.

Thoughts?

[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.]

This, too.

And this is enlightening too.

I think my brain BSOD'd from looking at that. Seriously, my sister's alarm went off, the page loaded, I glanced at it...
...And five minutes later, as the alarm went off again, I found myself laughing so hysterically I had a stitch in my side and tears running down my face; with no memory of what had transpired during the five minutes I apparently spent staring at my computer. For all I know, I was abducted by aliens.

I think I'm going to go lie down now...

Re: Achtung

I am will to believe that this Carolyn lady let her (possibly mentally ill) son (the 'artist' promo-ed on the site, Sean Terrence Best) do the website and never really bothered to look at it. It attracts attention, obvs, so she is probably happy with it. I suspected something similar when I first saw it.

What happened to the SA thread? It got all exciting and then people were going to visit and then it just stopped.

CONSPIRACY

Oh my god, my eyes. That is horrendous.
The goggles, they do nothing!

Also, what I've got from Sean Terrence Best is

I don't think he's retarded or autistic or anything, he had a cleft palate when he was born which accounts for the scarring on his upper lip...

I do get a vague FAS vibe from all those photos of him as a child, but I am by no means an expert.

But basically, what I reckon is that he was a pretty normal guy until he hit about 30 (there are photos of him looking normal and hanging out with friends from his late teens, and he claims to have been married) at which point the shittons of hallucinogens he'd been taking since he was a teenager (he refers to having taken a lot of drugs when he was young, and has some poems up about being high) kicked in, at which point he became utterly nuts, started painting, photographing everything ever and prancing about in a bedsheet. On his page about how he started painting, he even claims to have had trippy, recurring dreams right before.

So yeah, there's my armchair psychology right there.

I have the sneaking feeling that running this site through Geocities-izer would do one of the following...
1) Nothing, as it looks as it's been processed by the site already...
2) Said processing will improve the look of the site (contrary to expectations), as it will make look it less dire (or at least provide a excuse...).
3) Cause the Geocities-izer site to crash, as it's so dire already...

Why not find out for yourself?
Spoiler: Actually, I think it's an improvement on the original, not by much, but at least the horrible rainbow vomit is gone.

[You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

...Do you think they'd be offended if I called and asked if I could re-design their website?

Just think of what happens if the offer was accepted, and then they went around diddling with your code to make it look like vomit again.

Oh god you're right, and that would just be downright awful or something.