What? That's the title.
Wattpad.com
is a site that hosts user-generated (read: crap) ebooks, to be
downloaded onto poor unsuspecting people's iPhones via the Wattpad
application. Two of the most popular tags for the ebooks are VAMPIRE and
VAMPIRES. One of the others is FANTACY.
Fantacy mostly gets you
'Shadow of the Night' parts one to fifty-seven, an epic teen romance
with vampires stop me if this starts to sound familiar. Also this, The Tail of Ellinora and Jonathan.
I have no idea whether that typo is intentional. Maybe Ellinora and
Jonathan are secret furries. Here is the entirety of the story: you
figure it out.
- Quote :
Something was wrong. I didn't know
exactly what but that same something had women me up. What was it? A
simple question. One that I didn't have the answer to until I smelled
the arcid scentl of smoke. There's afire? The thought came to me more
like a question than a fact. That's when I looked around me and saw the
fire. It was practically surrounding me, how had I not noticed it
before? Right after I noticed the flame two things happened at once.
The bright orange-blue flame caught on my blanket and started to burn
my skin and the intense heat of the fire hit me. I opened my mouth to
let out a blood curteling scream and was met with silence. I tried to
move next but it wAs as if my body was a giant brick. The pain was
intense and traveled up my body from my leg. "This is all a dream," I
told myself. "It has to be. There's no way this is happening again. If
only I could wake up" All my efforts were in vain. I could not pull my
self from this dream.... No it wasn't a dream, it was a
nightmare.
- Quote :
- a blood curteling scream
No, not my blood! I need my blood noncurteled!
Anyway, that's enough possible furry fiction for me, back to the vampire princess's scholarly troubles.
- Quote :
- Aaarrggghhh! Why do I have to go to school! Why! Why! Why!
You have to learn that why is a question and should have a question mark.
- Quote :
- Urrrgghhh! When I am queen I swear I'm gonna make a rule saying that girls don't have to go to an all boy's boarding school!!
I would have thought that was implicit in 'all boys boarding school'. I guess that's why I'll never be queen.
- Quote :
- It's only because my dad is friends with the Headmaster that I'm even going to this stupid school.
At no point will the Vampire Princess explain why she can't just go to a regular, all-princesses boarding school.
- Quote :
- I'm getting married in 4 months to a guy I don't even know, well my dad
told me his name one time but it was soooo long ago that I don't even
remember.
Your future husband's name does seem like the sort of thing it'd be easy to forget.
- Quote :
- an all boys boarding school, which means no girls
Holy shit, it does?!
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