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 Fuck you I'm reviewing guns

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Penguin
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PostSubject: Fuck you I'm reviewing guns   Sat Sep 20, 2014 9:51 pm

Finally got out to shoot. It has been forever since I got to shoot for fun, so that's what I went out to the range to do today. Put about 94 rounds through the G36 and 18 through the DEagle.

Glock 36
Ammo: Fiocchi "Shooting Dynamics" 230 grain .45ACP FMJ
Recoil: Sharp
Muzzle climb: Assertive
Accuracy: Minute of mugger
Fun factor: Rapidly diminishes after the first mag

Eh, is Glock, is shoot. Dat trigger, doe. It's heavier than I remember my G20's being, which is apparently a thing with the G36. The trigger safety, which never was an issue before, wound up giving my trigger finger a blister. With my giant hands, it's also tougher to get a firm grip on it in proportion to the recoil. I found I was fighting my own flinch quite a bit as a result; at one point I was trying to concentrate on the front sight and realized it was vibrating. Recoil is delivered in a strong smack to the palm of your hand, amplified by the slimmer grip (the G36 is single-stack).

Mechanically it's accurate enough but it's short enough that the slightest deviation will send the bullet into la-la land. After I shifted my trigger finger to a less worn-out part of the pad, I wound up yanking the trigger and blasted a long-destroyed target frame to pieces. As it was about three feet lower than the close-range plate I was shooting at, I stared in disbelief for a minute, then figured that was enough Glock for today.

Desert Eagle
Ammo: Parabellum Research 300 grain .50AE JHP
Recoil: Firm push
Muzzle climb: Solid booster
Accuracy: Kerbal Space Program
Fun factor:  IT'S LIKE HOUSE OF THE DEAD ONLY LIKE A HUNDRED TIMES MORE AWESOME

By the time I started shooting the Desert Eagle, everyone else had moved over from the pistol range to the adjacent rifle range. Someone was doing rapid-fire drills with an AR, the pap-pap-pop of which quickly became drowned out because I'M SORRY I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF NEO GETTING MURDERED IN 303. I didn't shoot at the steel targets this time because I wasn't sure what they were rated for, and opted instead for a long- discarded target at the back of the range. I had brought Shoot-n-See targets of my own, but I didn't want to bother anyone to make the range cold. I AM AN INTROVERT.

Besides, I didn't get this Desert Eagle to compete, hunt, or defend myself. I bought it because REASONS.

Those reasons, as it turned out, include a GIANT MUZZLE FLASH in BROAD DAYLIGHT. They include HITTING MYSELF in the HEAD with LARGE BRASS. They include UNNECESSARY ACCURACY. They include CAPITAL LETTERS.

On at least two shots, I hit the piece of target and saw a big dust puff behind it at the bottom of the berm, and then saw another puff of dust on top of the berm. I don't know where those bullets went but I think I finally shut up the Space Core. The funny thing is that it doesn't kick very hard really, it but it REALLY wants to flip. Bad news: The slightest limp-wristing and it might not go back fully into battery, but I think it might just need some oil. We'll see.

EXPLOOOOOOOOOOOOSIOOOOOOOOOOOOONS


Last edited by Penguin on Sat Sep 20, 2014 9:59 pm; edited 2 times in total
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rae
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PostSubject: Re: Fuck you I'm reviewing guns   Sat Sep 20, 2014 9:52 pm

And now yr going to have to explain "Minute of mugger" again. Like, NAOW.
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Penguin
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PostSubject: Re: Fuck you I'm reviewing guns   Sat Sep 20, 2014 9:55 pm

"Minute of Angle" is a term for a certain amount of deviation. Like, if you shoot at a target at 100 meters and the shot is 1 inch away from the point of aim, its accuracy is one Minute of Angle, or 1MOA.

"Minute of _____" is now commonly misused to show you about how accurate something is as a tongue-in-cheek thing. "Minute of pie plate," "minute of bad guy," "minute of Buick," etc
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GamemasterAnthony
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PostSubject: Re: Fuck you I'm reviewing guns   Sun Sep 21, 2014 9:43 am

This thread is Marcus Kincaid approved.

And if I have to tell you who that is, you are required to play Borderlands 2...NOW!
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Mikey Go WOOGA
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PostSubject: Re: Fuck you I'm reviewing guns   Tue Sep 23, 2014 12:41 am

ITT: Penguin becomes Mr. Torgue
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rae
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PostSubject: Re: Fuck you I'm reviewing guns   Sun Sep 28, 2014 11:08 am

Mikey Go WOOGA wrote:
ITT: Penguin becomes Mr. Torgue

He's actually been talking about painting one of them (the DEagle??) like a Torgue weapon. I approve of this decision. TORGUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
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Mikey Go WOOGA
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PostSubject: Re: Fuck you I'm reviewing guns   Sun Sep 28, 2014 11:51 pm

^
YES

Then he has to MODIFY it to fire EXPLOSIVE rounds to JUSTIFY the EXCESSIVE CAPITAL LETTERS!
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Penguin
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PostSubject: Re: Fuck you I'm reviewing guns   Mon Sep 29, 2014 7:15 pm

Mikey Go WOOGA wrote:
^
YES

Then he has to MODIFY it to fire EXPLOSIVE rounds to JUSTIFY the EXCESSIVE CAPITAL LETTERS!

SADLY, the United States is governed by a REPRESSIVE REGIME (since 1934) that considers exploding bullets DESTRUCTIVE DEVICES and DEMANDS a TAX STAMP PER BULLET! Each tax stamp is TWO HUNDRED DOLLARS, effectively raising the price of a FULLY-LOADED Desert Eagle by FOURTEEN HUNDRED DOLLARS. I DO NOT HAVE THAT MUCH CASH LYING AROUND!
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rae
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PostSubject: Re: Fuck you I'm reviewing guns   Mon Sep 29, 2014 7:19 pm

Solution: FUCK LOADS OF TANNERITE
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Sheba
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PostSubject: Re: Fuck you I'm reviewing guns   Mon Sep 29, 2014 9:45 pm

My brother would be jizzing himself reading this thread; he's a national guard fuckwit who all but sodomizes himself with guns.
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Penguin
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PostSubject: Re: Fuck you I'm reviewing guns   Tue Sep 30, 2014 9:44 am

TESTOSTERONE!
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Sheba
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PostSubject: Re: Fuck you I'm reviewing guns   Tue Sep 30, 2014 11:05 am

Or something; I'm beginning to think it's part of the military brainwashing they had to do to get him used to the idea of killing for money.
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Penguin
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PostSubject: Re: Fuck you I'm reviewing guns   Tue Sep 30, 2014 12:57 pm

Uh-huh. What's his MOS?
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Sheba
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PostSubject: Re: Fuck you I'm reviewing guns   Tue Sep 30, 2014 1:07 pm

He's an MP.
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Penguin
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PostSubject: Re: Fuck you I'm reviewing guns   Tue Sep 30, 2014 1:33 pm

So you think "weekend gate guard" = "kill people for money" now?
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Sheba
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PostSubject: Re: Fuck you I'm reviewing guns   Tue Sep 30, 2014 2:08 pm

They're sending him back to Ferguson. And I know for a fact that were it not for his commanding officers he'd be mowing people down. He enjoys the power trip.
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Penguin
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PostSubject: Re: Fuck you I'm reviewing guns   Tue Sep 30, 2014 4:36 pm

Hahaha and this is why Active Duty finds the Guard endlessly entertaining
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