"This Game Is Bugged!"

This is DSPGaming. This is Phillip Burnell. This is DarkSydePhil.

He's really bad at this whole Let's Play thing.

Some problems with him:

*He's as stupid, unperceptive, and moronic as one human being can possibly be. I'm surprised that he can feed and bathe himself when he pulls shit like this:



As the video description says, "Maybe Phil is one of the aliens from Signs."

Also, he doesn't know where England is on a map of Europe. Show of internet hands-who doesn't know where England is on a map?



*It's never his fault, though.

Oh yes, all those failings, all those imperceptions-they're because the game is bugged. Get ready to hear his catchphrases a lot: "There was nothing I could do!" "I didn't do that!" "This game is bugged!". Watch as he claims he has a bug that is only present in his copy of the game! He's getting paid to do this, by the by:



*He's not funny.

Get used to this guy's laugh. It's everywhere. That horrible, horrible, ear-raping "pffftt ha ha ha ha ha" or, "huhuhuh". It's like he's Butthead or something. He really thinks he's a laugh riot.



*He never pays attention to cutscenes (also, he's a perv!)

Observe this:



*He's...well, actually, that's pretty much it.

Oh, yeah, his girlfriend may the most annoying woman on the planet.



Discuss below.

This guy...honestly found him through envilaj a few weeks ago. He makes me look like a pro at Dark Souls and I gave up after the Tauros Demon.

One of the worst parts about him is the final videos on all of his Let's Plays, where, despite hundreds of videos of bitch, whine, bitch, moan, he says...he loves the game! I can think of about thirty reasons for why he would do this, and all are variations of "covering his ass".

Never seen the official ones, since I don't want to support him at all. He makes me ill, yet I do play them just to have something to listen to...and remind me I'm normal.

Man, this looks like me playing Prince of Persia: Warrior Within while high as shit with my friends when I was 14.

EDIT because my guitarist showed me this when I mentioned this guy to him:

Heard about this guy recently. Apparently people are saying his Jak II Let's Play is the worst of all time? That might be an overreaction, though.

I watched three videos of Phil trying to figure stuff out, and he's so comically bad that it's like watching a cartoon character. His ignorance of geography is terrible but not surprising, but his handling of the block-stacking puzzle and the fence with the hole are just beyond failure.

I have to wonder if he's clowning around and isn't actually that dumb. I mean...can a person be that dumb?

oh how fun, it came to play with us

kghaleon wrote:

What have you ever created that anybody has ever enjoyed?

*points at signature*

kghaleon wrote:

You just sit there on your fat asses making up shit to defame him.

yeah it's not making up shit to criticise videos he actually made, dipshit.

kghaleon wrote:

Why don't you all go kill yourselves and make the world a better place. #dspositive

Well that's us telt.

kghaleon wrote:

Look at all you sad people, criticizing DSP. What the fuck is your problem? What have you ever created that anybody has ever enjoyed? You just sit there on your fat asses making up shit to defame him. Why don't you all go kill yourselves and make the world a better place. #dspositive

Oh hey, we found your videos! They're funny, sure, but not for the reason you think. You're really bad at videogames; are you like, hydrocephalic or something?

I actually think this guy is not DSP. His name points to it being this guy: [You must be registered and logged in to see this link.]

Or maybe DSP's so spineless he's hiding behind the name of one of his fans. Who knows.

What he fails at is being good at video games, you sad little syncophant. If anything this dude harbors delusions of adequacy.

kghaleon wrote:

You're pathetic. You faggots will just believe anything you want to believe in order to follow the crowd. What, you can't handle a real let's player, one who's honest and shows his fails? Get fucked. Oh, and cyberwolf, your shit is unbearable. Don't get delusions of grandeur.

Maybe this is just your brain damage talking, but we never once mentioned we're better. We just think he's incompetent at gaming.

kghaleon wrote:

He plays games for FUN. F U N, FUN.

Wow, you can spell "fun". You must be so proud of yourself.

Quote :

You don't understand this shit, and then claim I have brain dmage? Unlike every other let's player on youtube, he tells it like it is.

Is it such an overexertion of braincells to be able to do a Let's Play competently?

Quote :

If a game is shit, it's shit. He doesn't sugarcoat it like IGN or something.

Yeah, shifting the blame of his own stupidity onto the game because he can't figure out how the controls is clearly the game's fault. The game must be broken because it didn't do a proper job of holding his hand all the way through, so it's not his fault. How wrong of me. I'm sure to lose sleep over this massive insight.

Finally, some action! I missed the big rows with Cynthia Hanson and the loveshy guy, so this will be exciting! I hope he sticks around and uses more slurs

So question, dude: If it's the game's fault and not your friend's, why is it that hundreds, if not thousands, of other LPers manage to play it just fine every single day? Does your friend have the one single, defective copy in existence?

kghaleon wrote:

You're pathetic. You faggots will just believe anything you want to believe in order to follow the crowd. What, you can't handle a real let's player, one who's honest and shows his fails? Get fucked.

WHAT

CRITICISM

TERMINATE YOUR EXISTENCE, YOU PITIABLE HETEROSEXUAL

Quote :

Oh, and cyberwolf, your shit is unbearable. Don't get delusions of grandeur.

Ah, ah, kghaleon, I never said it was bearable. You asked what I'd ever done that anyone had enjoyed. Judging by the reviews (especially for Turnabout Lockdown), I made something over a hundred people found enjoyable. What's the matter bro, you jellie?

kghaleon wrote:

He plays games for FUN. F U N, FUN.

Oh, well we do this for fun. Don't like it? There's a big X in the corner you can click. There, all gone.

Cyberwulf wrote:

TERMINATE YOUR EXISTENCE, YOU PITIABLE HETEROSEXUAL

haha holy shit, sigg'd

Thought this website was turning into The Caamib Show, so here's more DSP to wash that taste out of your mouth! Even as somebody who hates DSP's goddamn guts, this is an actual, unbelievably stupid glitch. Perhaps not stupid enough to justify a rage quit, but nevertheless...

DSP is kill.

Oh my god, look at the post date! KG either has no life or is an obsessive lunatic. Possibly both.

kghaleon wrote:

shut up you fuckin jew

stop talking you fornicating national socialist