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 Big Bang Experiment. With Eggnog.

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grmblfjx
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Join date : 2009-06-10

PostSubject: Big Bang Experiment. With Eggnog.   Wed Dec 26, 2012 2:10 pm


So I don't actually read fanfiction. Shocker, I know. But I was browsing -or glancing at, rather- the Promote A Story subforum on AFF (and let me tell you, there is no reason to waste any time doing that) and noticed someone promoting their Big Bang Theory oneshot called [You must be registered and logged in to see this link.] [sic]- and heyyyy I know the fandom, for once, so what the hell...


...this is the point where you notice that I felt compelled to make this post, and go "ooohhhhh." And you are right.


Quote :
I haven’t seen all the seasons of Big bang theory so this will probably not work out the way I want it to.

What won't work out? The show? Your oneshot? "These 994 words totally got away from me!"


Quote :
[Penny] opens the door to find Sheldon not dressed in his normal attire, he was in a red shirt that said “there is only one fat man who brings me presents and it’s not Santa Claus” Bart Simpson was on the front of it.
Why hello, mid-sentence tense change. That right there is usually a dealbreaker, but...

Quote :
Penny giggled. Sheldon Frowned.

...this thing keeps making me laugh.


Sheldon wants to "implore" an experiment with Penny. The experiment is called "what kind of alcohol goes best with eggnog?" and is justified as follows:

Quote :
I have seen year after year our friends drink eggnog and come home drunk. They listed off all the good things that go with Eggnog and I want to try them to gather information and use it for further reference.

...

...I know, right? But, this is Penny/Sheldon, you gotta get them drunk so they'll hook up, I suppose- a great many relationships are based on no more than too much eggnog.
Or so I've heard.

So they drink, and Sheldon enters their "findings" into a spreadsheet, which is a valiant attempt at making him in-character, I'm sure. Except for the part where he buys "at least 20 bottles of eggnog and 10 bottles of alcohol" in the first place. But hey.


Quote :
“Why are you alone this Christmas eve? Why aren’t you with your mom and meeMaw?”

“Because despite having a suitable job, I just couldn’t get enough cash together to go see them in Texas.”

Great line, isn't it? Despite having a suitable job, Sheldon didn't fly home because he can't afford to. If you acknowledge the plot hole, it isn't one! And given the fact that he just spent at least $250 on drinks, I can't seem to muster any sympathy anyway.


Quote :
I could ask you the same thing Penny. Why are you alone this night?”

“Because I don’t have anyone to celebrate with.”

“You have me.” Sheldon says quietly

HAHA WHAT


And now, can I have a drum roll for what is by far the funniest part of the entire thing:

Quote :
Penny stares at him with big eyes. Sheldon blushes and looks up at Penny. Penny blushes and looks down at her drink before looking up.
Oh, I love it. Try reading it out loud, preferably at someone.



Quote :
This could be the alcohol talking but I felt something when we kissed and I actually liked it. Did you?”

“Penny in fact I did like it. I never felt something before with Amy. There was a spark.”

“Yes there was. What does this mean for us now?”

"This means you're an overbearing cow, or two minutes of kissing wouldn't have prompted you to have A Talk."


Quote :
Penny lets go of Sheldon and they settle down on the couch, cuddled up and watched ‘white Christmas’.
TENSES, YO

HAVE YOU HEARD OF THEM



Quote :
“Merry Christmas Penny.”

“Merry Christmas Sheldon”

They cuddle back up and watch the rest of the movie.

...What do you mean they don't even hook up?? What is this fuckery? What the hell did they need twenty bottles of eggnog for, dammit?!


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Reepicheep-chan
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Join date : 2009-06-11
Age : 32
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PostSubject: Re: Big Bang Experiment. With Eggnog.   Wed Dec 26, 2012 2:24 pm

Already being tipsy will taint your results, learn to science Sheldon.



I mean shit I can eat like a whole bottle of pickled onions once I get drunk.
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The Scientist
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Join date : 2010-10-05
Location : Under Strangeland's Iron Sea

PostSubject: Re: Big Bang Experiment. With Eggnog.   Thu Dec 27, 2012 11:56 am

What.


Man, I was at least expecting some awkward sex. Cuddling in a badfic is just....lame.
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ZOOLANDER
Armbiter of Good Fanfiction
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Join date : 2010-10-21
Age : 32

PostSubject: Re: Big Bang Experiment. With Eggnog.   Thu Dec 27, 2012 2:21 pm

The author was probably worse at sex scenes than they are at tenses. Wink
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cristina_chavia
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Join date : 2009-07-14
Location : Nottingham, UK

PostSubject: Re: Big Bang Experiment. With Eggnog.   Thu Dec 27, 2012 3:48 pm

Quote :
my muses wanted something different

Like capital letters and a non-blushing Sheldon?

Since when doesn't Sheldon have money?

I don't care for this.
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