Why God, Why?

HomeHome  FAQFAQ  RegisterRegister  Log in  

Share | 

 You Chose Which Path You Take

Go down 

Join date : 2009-11-27
Location : 221B

PostSubject: You Chose Which Path You Take   Wed Jan 04, 2012 11:28 pm

So basically I'm really in love with the Uncharted games. They're a good bit of fun with memorable, interesting characters, brilliant visuals, and captivating plots that involve dangerous, historical lore-filled treasure hunts. They're basically like playing through a really good action/adventure movie--what's not to love? Now recently I was looking for something to snark and it occurred to me to look in the Pit's Uncharted section. It's a small section, with almost 200 fics as I type this. Surprisingly, most of them are are...well, they're not great, but they're not bad. They're just average.
And then this came along.

This fic was originally called "You Chose Which Path You Take", but it seems that the author has retitled it to "Uncharted: Sic Parvis Magna". It doesn't really matter because both titles are rather bland and uninteresting, which isn't really surprising considering the nature of this fic. The author's name is "Madam Oakheart a Shishou Kamen" and judging by her fanfiction.net profile, she's obsessed with Phantom of the Opera. This bodes well.
Basically the plot of this piece of badfic is that Victor Sullivan (one of the main characters and father-figure to the protagonist of the games, Nathan Drake) actually has--le gasp--a daughter. And Nate is in love with her. Pretty common plot for an OC fic, but what makes this one interesting is not only its total distaste for anything that resembles canon, but its bizarre mood swings. You'll see what I mean. Without further ado, let's dive right in.

(Oh, quick note for those who haven't played the games: Talbot is one of the main villains in the most recent installment of the series.)

Quote :
All right anyone who reads this I need some help.
I’m sure we can get you some meds, if that’s what you’re talking about.

Quote :
You see no one knows Talbots first name so I'm gonna make one up and I would like some suggestions so let me know through a PM or REVIEW
Anyone have a suggestion? Talbot doesn’t have a canonical first name, so I suggest Billyjoebob.

Quote :
Charter 1: Nate's P.O.V Meeting Sully (Sully 32, Cara 13, Nate 13)
Huh, well now that’s strange. Nate didn’t meet Sully until he was 14. Hooray for research!

Quote :
Weary with hunger and lack of sleep I stumbled after Victor Sullivan. I didn't trust the man and I had no idea where we were going so I tried to stay alert.
What were you, roofied? What the hell were you just doing? You seemed barely winded after the whole rooftop chase scene in Cartagena. I mean, you and Sully had a whole exposition scene after that and you were totally normal. Was there something in that soda you were drinking?

Quote :
It was hard but I made it all the way to a small house. Going through the front door Sullivan practically pushed me onto his couch.
You know, if this were out of context it would sound really creepy, considering the fact that Nate is—well, I guess in the fic he’s thirteen—and Sully is in his 30’s.

Quote :
Trying but failing to stay awake I faded into dreams. I hated that I let my guard down but I couldn't help it.
“Three words: Ro-hyp-nol.”
Reference, anyone?

Quote :
"Who is he?" I asked in an angry whisper.
"I saved his life and he has nowhere to go."
"We are not running a fucking orphanage."
"Just let him stay a while alright kiddo."
Who’s in charge here? Sully, or the pre-teen?

Quote :
I threw a glare at the boy asleep on the couch. He had short brown hair and a slim completion.
What does a “slim completion” look like, exactly?

Quote :
Weak and helpless that was the last thing we needed.
“I’ve seen too much death in my thirteen years.”

Quote :
With a snarl I stalked away going into the back yard.
Right, because the crowded area of Cartagena has backyards.
Also: Down girl, down! We told you no snarling at the guests, or you’ll have to go in the basement until they’re gone. And no Kibbles N Bits.

Quote :
Taking a big breath I plopped down on the grass and pulled out my sketchbook. With ease I began to draw it always seemed to relive my stress.
I would think reliving your stress would kinda suck, actually.

Quote :
I drew a picture of the boy but older holding a shot gun. (I don't own the pose found it on Google) It turned out pretty good.
You realize we can’t see the picture, right? You don’t need to…y’know what, never mind.

Quote :
"Is that supposed to be me?" The boy asked behind me. I raised an eyebrow he was quiet.
"An older version of you I think."
"It's pretty good how long have you been drawing?"
"Since I was little I guess. I've got a bunch of sketchbooks full of drawings."
“I guess I drew the pictures inside them. I don’t remember drawing them, but they must’ve got next to my bed somehow…”

Quote :
"If I asked nicely would you pose for me?" Turning around in surprise I searched his face for any kind of jest.
"Alright what kind of pose would you want me to do?"
"Just like you are." I was in a crouching position and my hair was swaying in the wind.
Draw me like one of your French girls
You know, in a heroic pose.

Quote :
I nodded and he flipped open a beat up sketch book.
His lips pursed in concentration and he began. After about an hour my legs began to ache. "Can we take a break?" I asked.
She held a crouching pose with her hair blowing for an hour? Is she super-resistant to cramping? Does she have perfect balance? Was the wind constant?

Quote :
With realization he quickly responded, "Yea sure." Standing I stretched. "So what's your name?" He asked me.
"Are you related to Sully?"
“Yeah, I’m his boss.”

Quote :
I looked away not sure if to tell him who I was, He seemed nice and all but could I trust him.
It’s not like Sully would tell him later or anything.

Quote :
Well I'll give it a shot, "Yes I'm Cara Sullivan his only child." The boy smiled.
"I'm Nathan Drake."
"Are you of any relation to Francis Drake?"
Of course she knows about Francis Drake. Why would she not? She’s a history buff, of course.

Quote :
"Yes his only descendent."
Okay, I know you’re not really descended from Sir Francis Drake, but even if you were, you’re not really his “only descendent”…You may be the only currently living one, but I mean, he’s had other descendents. People you’re related to, for some.

Quote :
"Sic Parvis Magna." I spoke in a perfect accent for the language.
AND SHE SPEAKS PERFECT LATIN! Of course. The typical thirteen year-old does learn dead languages, of course. Sully doesn’t know Latin. Sully didn’t know much about Sir Francis Drake, and he certainly didn’t know the “Sic Parvis Magna” slogan before Nate told him about it. Is this chick just really pulling the shots? Damn.
Wait, can you even have a “perfect accent” for Latin? It’s a dead language, meaning no one speaks it anymore, meaning no one even has an “accent” for it, per se…

Quote :
"Greatness from small beginnings."
"Perhaps that is us. Maybe we shall achieve greatness one day."
"We can only dream."
“I mean, that’s probably the closest you’ll get to it, anyway.”

Quote :
"I like you Nate. I believe you might actually help this family. Hell I'm up for anything."
A few years later (Sully 35, Cara and Nate 15)
"Run!" I ran faster than ever before as the sound of gun fire sounded behind us. Dad always seemed to get us in this kind of mess.
Really. What would ever give you that impression? The fact that people hire him to steal valuable artifacts?

Quote :
Grabbing Nate's hand I whipped around a corner running straight into one of the men we were running from. Grabbing me I tried to kick him. It was useless I couldn't escape. Nate came out of nowhere and tackled the guy. The man had a knife, about to cry out in warning someone else tried to snatch me. Turning I kicked him and looked back at Nate to find blood running down his arm. Pulling out my own knife I rammed it into the mans side.
Fifteen and no qualms about killing. Hooray! This is totally realistic.

Quote :
Taking Nate's hand again I began to pull him away. He was gritting his teeth and his eyes whipped around in panic. We had been cornered. Putting a hand on my waist he shoved me behind him. My cheeks heated a little at the gesture. "Nate are we going to die?"
I thought you knew everything, Mary-Sue?

Quote :
"I hope not but even if it's a small possibility I want to do this before I die." He kissed me then both of us having our first kiss there at gun point.
“I didn’t necessarily want to kiss you, I just didn’t want to die never having kissed anyone. That would be totally lame.”
Welp, they’ll always have…erm…that alley where they stabbed a dude.

Quote :
A shot fired and I waited for the pain. Opening my eyes slowly I saw one of the men fall soon all of them were on the ground.
Above us I heard Dad shout, "Don't you mess with my family."
“I love them and I—hey, what the fuck are they doing down there—oh my god that is disgusting! They’re practically related! Nate, get your tongue out of her mouth!”

Quote :
He had a gun in one hand the other was flipping them off and in his mouth was a lit cigar. I began to laugh.
Murder is hilarious! I’m glad to know Sully’s children are psychopaths.

Quote :
Through all of this and he was smoking. He walked up to us placing a hand on Nate's shoulder he examine it. "This will need stitched. Cara can do you up when we get back to the car." Both of us blushed at his wording.
Lololol oh Sully you and your innuendos
Come on you guys, that wasn’t even a good innuendo! It’s like it was written by some terrible author—oh, wait.

Quote :
He chuckled and led us to the car. As dad walked ahead Nate slipped his hand in mine and grinned. My blush grew but I kept hold on his hand. I saw dad smile and I knew he knew.
He may play dumb with everyone else but I knew him too well for that.
Wait, what? How does Sully play dumb? I’m genuinely confused about this. How does anything in the games indicate that Sully plays dumb?

Quote :
Nate was smiling a huge smile. The pain from his arm forgotten with being able to hold my hand. Grinning I slipped into the back seat of our stolen Mercedes. Dad drove a few miles before pulling over so I could doctor Nate.
Oh, and a fucking doctor, too. She’ll be a Nobel Prize winner by chapter two, at this rate.

Quote :
Flinching at the sight of the needle he looked away as it punctured the skin. My other hand went to his and gave it a reassuring squeeze. Once it was stitched and bandaged we took off again. "Where to now?" I asked.
"I was thinking Peru."
"Alright Peru it is."
"I actually don't like Peru." Nate put in.
"Live with it Nate."
"Really we got arrested there 3 months ago. At least wait a while longer."
"That was your own damn fault kid." Dad injected.
"Sorry Dad but that was your fault. You were the one that made him pick pocket that old lady for lunch."
"I was hungry."
"That's nice."
"I bailed him out."
"You got him there in the first place."
That's true Sully."
If I wanted to hear this conversation I would go play Uncharted 3 again. It was infinitely more entertaining. And the writing was twenty thousand times better.
Also, is it really a good idea to go back to a place you were presumably performing illegal treasure hunting acts in after so short an amount of time? Just seems like an unwise decision. Or is it just that the author doesn’t know any other places for them to go? That’s probably it.

Quote :
"Shut up you two love birds."
"Sully!" Nate and I said in unison. He laughed and looked away.
"I'm just stating the obvious but damn I couldn't be happier. Can I come to the wedding?" I slapped myself in the face and groaned he was never going to let this go was he.
Wow, um. Why, exactly, are you so happy about the fact that your daughter is going to be doing it with your adopted son?

Quote :
"Congratu-fucking-lations." I snarled. My cheeks were a fierce shade of scarlet. Right now I wanted to blow away in the wind.
"Ignore him Cara." Nate said rubbing my knee. Leaning down he kissed me. Dad opened his mouth to say something when I flipped him off. We sure were one strange family.
I’ll say…there’s one more of you than there should be.

There are two more chapters of this (because the badfic gods are being good to me, I guess), and they just get worse as it goes on. I should have them up soon. c:
Back to top Go down


Join date : 2011-01-05
Location : Somewhere far, far away

PostSubject: Re: You Chose Which Path You Take   Thu Jan 05, 2012 9:00 pm

Quote :
Wait, what? How does Sully play dumb? I’m genuinely confused about this. How does anything in the games indicate that Sully plays dumb?

Sully doesn't have to play dumb, he just is dumb. Kidding, I love Sully. Don't hurt me.
Back to top Go down
My Mescaline
My Mescaline

Join date : 2009-06-11
Age : 25
Location : Tea & Castle Land

PostSubject: Re: You Chose Which Path You Take   Thu Jan 05, 2012 9:24 pm

Happenstance wrote:
AND SHE SPEAKS PERFECT LATIN! Of course. The typical thirteen year-old does learn dead languages, of course.
Just like to say, in many European countries it's very common to learn Latin at school. My Italian ex learned it from age 6, and it was taught as compulsory at my (English) school up to age 14 (and offered to age 16). Just saiyan, it's not so unusual.

Happenstance wrote:
Wait, can you even have a “perfect accent” for Latin? It’s a dead language, meaning no one speaks it anymore, meaning no one even has an “accent” for it, per se…
On this bit you're right, it's impossible. You get taught to speak it how it's spelled, as pronounciation is a massive point of contention. The two Latin teachers at my school used to have giant rows over whether "v" was pronounced as a "w" sound or not, for example. You can make an educated guess as to how it's pronounced based on modern Italian etc but there's no real consensus.

Back to top Go down

Join date : 2009-11-27
Location : 221B

PostSubject: Re: You Chose Which Path You Take   Thu Jan 05, 2012 11:06 pm

Seule wrote:
Happenstance wrote:
AND SHE SPEAKS PERFECT LATIN! Of course. The typical thirteen year-old does learn dead languages, of course.
Just like to say, in many European countries it's very common to learn Latin at school. My Italian ex learned it from age 6, and it was taught as compulsory at my (English) school up to age 14 (and offered to age 16). Just saiyan, it's not so unusual.
Ah, I did forget about that. Although since Sully is American (and we don't learn foreign languages as children because broadening your cultural horizons is useless to most public school systems, apparently) and I'm assuming his "daughter" doesn't go to school anyway due to their illegal activities, I doubt she'd really have the opportunity to learn the language...

Anyway, chapter two.

Quote :
You guys. We have to write a “sing review” for this fic. I’m taking that to mean a musical number, so someone should get on that.

Quote :
Chapter 2: Sully 52, Nate and Cara 32 17 years later
Yeah, I’m sure nothing important happened in the time that’s passed.

Quote :
"Nate." I mumbled. Leaning over I reached for his side of the bed only finding empty air I sat up. Glancing around I saw no one but me in the room. Getting up I pulled on my robe covering the tank top and underwear I wore. "Nate." I called out again as I entered the living room.
Nate lay asleep on the couch. The TV was still running full blast. I shook his shoulder and he blinked awake. "What…"
"You fell asleep on the couch." Once he realized this he stood up. Taking his hand I pulled him into bed with me. Snuggling up against him I faded back into dreams.
Nate left to go watch reruns of Say Yes to the Dress as soon as she was asleep, groaning about how fucking clingy his dipshit half-sister was.

Quote :
The sun hit my eyes at the worst angle waking me up. Groaning I sat up in bed. Rubbing my eyes I stumbled over to my dresser (.com/cgi/set?id=41382347)
I…don’t…what? Did the word processor have a seizure? Is that supposed to be a link to a picture of her dresser? What the fuck?

Quote :
pulling out an outfit I put it on.
See, with Mary-Sues you can have two equally annoying ends of an extreme. You can have Mary-Sues that irritatingly describe every single aspect of their outfits, or you can have Mary-Sues like this one, who don’t describe it at all but mention it once in a while with no detail, leaving you frustrated.

Quote :
With the smell of French toast in the air I stumbled towards the kitchen to find Nate holding a plate of syrupy goodness.
Nate’s eating a plate of syrup? He’s really putting effort into becoming Doughnut Drake, isn’t he?

Quote :
Smiling I collapsed in a chair pushing my hair out of my face.
Nate grinned and sat beside me. Patting my leg he grinned sheepishly and his hand went a little high. Slapping the hand away I took a giant bite of the French toast, syrup slipping down my chin.
Yeah, that’s sexy. Does the author have a breakfast fetish or something?

Quote :
Nate then kissed my chin and licked off the syrup.
"You two need to learn to do that outside my sight, gonna give me a damn heart attack one of these days." Dad said getting some coffee.
Huh, you were all too eager twenty years ago, Sully.

Quote :
"He did it. He always does it, s'not my fault."
"Yet you do nothing to stop him do you." He said raising an eyebrow.
"Well…it's just…uhhh….I….damn you." I stuttered out my cheeks a fierce shade of scarlet. Nate still completely unashamed grinned and put an arm around my shoulder.
Leaning into him I savored his warmth against my skin. Recently Nate and I had been heavy in activities if you catch my drift
Yeah, but are you having sex?

Quote :
but he comes home smelling weird a lot lately.
…Uh…thanks for sharing?

Quote :
Now I knew my Nate and the chance of him cheating was slim to none but I suspected. I had been terrified it was true and he had met a girl named Elena Fisher a while back and I caught him flirting with her once.
Don’t let that canon bitch break you up, Cara! Fight the good fight, girl!

Quote :
I remember the anger and the heartache that came after that. Sometimes Nate takes things for granted. To tell you honestly I'm rather sick of it.
Ladies and Gentlemen: a love-hate relationship.
“I love my boyfriend! We just started having sex twenty years into the relationship and I couldn’t live without him—except when I hate him. Sometimes I really hate him.”

Quote :
I could think of no better time nor no easier way to find out so sitting at the dining table I asked him with a strong but stubborn voice, "Nathan are you cheating on me?"
WHOA, WAIT. You bring up your personal business in the middle of a normal breakfast moment, out of the blue, in front of your dad?

Quote :
Dad dropped his plate and it shattered on the ground. He stepped towards Nate eyes full with rage.
Uh, and sudden mood swings from Sully! Who instantly wants to murder Nate despite there being no evidence or suggestion that he actually is cheating on his daughter, and that Sully would never in million years do anything to hurt Nate, and…
Never mind. I’ll just stand back here reading Nolan North’s book.

Quote :
Nate stood up speechless and said, "I love you."
“But…I…uh, have to go now. Parkour, awaaaaaay!”

Quote :
"Liar…" I whispered I could see the panic in him eyes just as I could see the guilt and regret. "Why Nate…"
"I don't know why it's just…I'm sorry I'll never see her again."

Quote :
"Get out of my house." I heard dad growl behind me. Nate looked at him in confusion. "I said get you damn ass out or I'll throw you out!" Dad's voice lowered pure rage taking over.
Now here’s a conflict. This is both canonical and non-canonical: Sully would talk like that if he were to ever throw Nate out, except he’d never do that, because Nate’s like the son he never had and goddammit, they’re a family and he would respect Nate enough to let him get out of his relationship with this Cara bitch.

Quote :
Now I knew my dad was protective but I never knew he'd take it this far. Love shown in my eyes along with gratitude. He gave me a small smile as Nate stomped off.
So…suddenly Nate’s an abusive douchebag? Wow.

Quote :
It was only when he was far away did I begin to cry. Sinking to my knees I bawled my eyes out like a new born babe. Dad wrapped his arms around me and whispered comforts in my ear. Sobbing I clutched his shoulder. He rubbed my back. Pulling away I wiped my eyes and stood.
Going over to the broken plate I began to clean. Dad told me I didn't have to that he would do it but I didn't listen I couldn't hear anything but my own thoughts. I was 32 and could leave if I wanted too.
But I won’t, because of reasons?
Seriously, your dad handles all your problems. Grow the fuck up.

Quote :
Inside my head I planned the two notes I would write. Telling Dad I'd be in my room I locked the door and began to write. Setting the two papers down I reread them. One read:
Dear Dad,
I'm sorry but I can't stay here it brings it all back.
You know, all the stuff that happened just as recently as minutes ago.

Quote :
I have a friend who lives in town. I'll stay with them. Don't worry I'll be safe, for you I always am. In case of emergencies just call me. Track my phone and I'll never forgive you. For once I need to go it alone. I'll stay in contact and if I get a new phone I'll send you the number. I love you, Daddy…
Your little girl Cara
The other note was for Nate:
Nathan Drake,
Hello, as you will know I have left. I hope your relationship with Elena Fisher goes well. All I want is for you to be happy. I'm sorry that I was never enough and hope you can forgive me for it.
Damn, girl. Let it go. As far as I can tell you’ve been in a relationship for TWENTY YEARS. IF YOU’RE NOT MARRIED BY NOW YOU PROBABLY NEVER WILL BE.
Just deal with the fact that you’re boring and move on.

Quote :
Though I have a favor to ask, take care of Dad alright.
Nate, reading the note later, thinks “yeah, I would do that, except I was kicked out because of you. If you had brought up your concerns in private, things might be different, but nooooo.”

Quote :
I want to know he's safe. Thank you for what we had once for those memories are what I'll never forget…
Goodbye Nate,
Cara Sullivan
Taking a deep breath I gather up all my clothes and my gun. Pushing my favorite knife in my boot and tying one of Nate's scarves around my waist I climbed out of my window. Walking away I turned a corner into an empty alley way taking my phone from my satchel I dialed a number. "Hello?" A voice said.
"I'd like to speak to Conner Talbot." The sound of the phone changing hand came and a voice I hadn't heard in a long time spoke.
Meh, I still like Billyjoebob more as a name.

Quote :
"Who is this?"
"It's Cara."
I could almost hear the smile in his voice, "Hey! How have you been?"
"Horrid. I hate to ask but do you have a place I could crash?"
"Of course where are you, I'll come pick you up."
Right, yes. Because Talbot’s a casual dude who has a couch for people to crash on. He’s chill like that.

Quote :
"I'm in Central Square."
"I'll see you soon."
"Can't wait." The phone clicked and I headed to Central Square.
Are you supposed to be in New York? Do you mean Central Park? Wait, where are you?
Okay, hang on, I googled it. Apparently Central Square is in Cambridge, Massachusetts, but somehow I highly doubt that’s what the author meant.

Quote :
Sitting on a bench I waited. A black car pulled up and Conner stepped out. He had a fancy suit on and I had to hold in a laugh.
"Long time no see." I called out.
Seeing me he smiled rushing over he pulled me in for a hug. "You have no idea how much I've missed you."
To be honest I’m surprised Nate hasn’t accused you of being unfaithful…you don’t seem like the type to keep your affections inside around dudes. In fact he would have about the same amount of evidence that you had when you accused him of cheating.
Back to top Go down
Sponsored content

PostSubject: Re: You Chose Which Path You Take   

Back to top Go down
You Chose Which Path You Take
Back to top 
Page 1 of 1
 Similar topics
» [Board] Roll the Dice: A Hero's Path [September 16th 2014 - September 19th 2014]
» Phase Splitter Tubes and Effect on Sound?
» Medieval Town - Updates
» PAS 3X - loudness and filter switch
» Carpinus "Killer nebari", winter session

Permissions in this forum:You cannot reply to topics in this forum
Why God, Why? :: The Sporking Table :: New Releases-
Jump to: