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 "Midnight Run"

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textrix

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Join date : 2010-12-22

PostSubject: "Midnight Run"   Sun Dec 18, 2011 5:46 pm

"A Midnight Run"
Brace yourselves. What you are about to read is cruel and unusual. This is not a troll, because this author has other stories that range from 22-54 chapters.

Quote :
Plot : There is going to be love and some backstabbing . Some fanasty and action and romance . The main characters are Harry Potter and Ginny Weasley and Sirius Black and Cedric Diggory and Hermione Granger. We are all of the ages of 17 and 18 and 19 .
We are all of the ages of 17 and 18 and 19 .
We are all of the ages of 17 and 18 and 19 .
We are all of the ages of 17 and 18 and 19 .
WE.

I can already tell that there's going to be some "fan-nasty." In fact, it's a lovely way of encapsulating exactly what these tards do to a fandom.

Also, STOP PUTTING A SPACE BEFORE EVERY PERIOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Quote :

Chapter 1 : School
Harry Potter's point of view: Here is yet another year at school I'll get to see all of my friends again it has only been a year has passed since I saw Hermione, and Cedric and of couse my godfather Sirius Black . When I am at school I say hello to all of my friends. Then Cedric and Herimione start talking about their day. There is this huge magic exam , and I talk to them me not studying as much, but I know Herimione and Cedric have been studying. Herimione looks at me and hugs me . Cedric was sitting outiside of school.
Okay, so far so terrible. What happens next?

Quote :

Herimione Granger's point of view: I was walking back to school for yet another year, and I already have to already start studying for my huge magic exam, when I looked up and saw Harry walking though the school and I said hello to him and I also gave him a hug. He looked at me and smiled. It seems like he hasn't study for his huge magic exam, I walked outside and I smiled at Cedric Diggory.

Wait--this seems vaguely familiar. Did this happen already?

Quote :
Cedric Diggory's point of view: I am here once again at school and I have to start studying for my huge magic exam and I decided to study outside when I saw Harry and Herimione . I placed my books down when Harry and Hermione came over.
what.

Quote :
Ginny Weasley's point of view: I came back yet another year here and I saw Harry , Cedric, and Hermione . I said hi to them all then, I had to quickly had to grab my books to study for my huge magic exam.

This is like Groundhog Day except instead of the same day being repeated interminably, every moment is repeated 8 different ways. Who would be this stupid? What is going on? Does this author have a space/time continuum tick? A cruel sense of humour? Is it a robot?

Harry: I walked.
Ginny: I saw Harry Potter walk.
Ron: I saw Harry Potter walk and Ginny was there.
Hermione: I saw Harry Potter walk while I was also walking.
Dumbledore: I looked out of my window and saw some students walking.
A bird: I see humans walking beneath me.
The author: I am writing about Harry Potter walking.
God: *facepalm*

Quote :
Harry Potter's point of view: When I went to the boy's dorm , the teachers placed our bags in our rooms. I stayed in the room after I had dinner and spent the rest of the night there.

This is some edge-of-your-seat stuff. Slow down before I have a heart-attack, Breaking_Dawn21!

Quote :
Sirius Black's point of view: After Lilly and James Potter died. They made me their son' s godfather so I could protect Harry and watch him. I know that Harry was just on Summer break and he came over for a visit before he had to go back to school. Some of his friends joined him there names are Hermione Granger along with Cedric Diggory and Harry's girlfriend and her name is Ginny Weasley.

I like how the author has to remind us that this occurs after Lily and James died. Is every P.O.V. going to go back in time too?

Harry: After the dinosaurs went extinct. I was sitting on my bed. I saw a piece of lint on my robe. I picked it off. I threw it on the floor.

Cedric: Before I did what I was about to do, but after what I was going to do before I did that, I saw Harry pick a piece of lint off himself and throw it on the floor.

GAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Quote :
Hermione Granger's point of view: It is finally night time at the school and some of the teachers brought up the girl's bags to their rooms and now I may start unpacking.

Cedric Diggory's point of view: I saw that my bags that I brought here for school year the teachers placed the bags right next to Harry Potter's bed, so that must mean that I'll be sharing a dorm with the famous Harry Potter.

Not only does this author feel the need to repeat time, rather than moving forward, she isn't creative enough to have different things happen to different characters. THE SAME THING HAPPENS TO EVERYONE, AND IT IS REPEATED IN EVERY PERSON'S POV.

Quote :

Harry Potter's point of view: While I was in bed, I was reading a book, after that I noticed that I was sharing a dorm with Cedric Diggory. When I feel a sleep I thought about my girlfriend Ginny Weasly. I know she is here at the school, but I can't sleep in the same room with her because she has to stay in the girl's dorm with Hermione. Cerdric asked me if Hermione is dating anyone I said no Hermione isn't she is no one's girlfriend I said. He said to me thank you Harry, he hugged me. I know Cedric and I are going to become good friends this year.

Please kinky butt sex. Please kinky butt sex. Please kinky butt sex.

Quote :

Cedric Diggory's point of view: I spoke to Harry while we were in the boys dorms and I asked him a question about a girl that I had my eye on her name is Hermione Granger. I had asked him if she was seeing anyone and he said to me no she isn't she is no one's girlfriend that I know of at the moment he said to me. I smiled at him and gave him a hug before we both went off to bed for the night.

NOooOOoooOOOooOOOoo.

Quote :
Hermione Granger's point of view: I shared a dorm with Ginny Weasley and I know she is happy dating Harry Potter who is my best friend . We got to talk and she said a boy was looking at you Hermione. The boy's name is Cedric Diggory. I blushed deep red, because I knew Ginny was right . I want to know if she is right . I think she is.

"I knew Ginny was right" "I want to know if she's right" "I think she's right"

Quote :
Cedric Diggory's point of view: I dislike being single and well both of us Hermione was looking at me and I was looking at her she is preety and smart and I like her and that is what I like in a girl . So well both of us were taking a break durning school and I asked her on a date.

Hermione's Granger's point of view: I saw that Cedric was looking at me and well the both of us were taking a break durning school he started talking to me and he asked me on a date and I said yes to the date which is on next Friday . He hugged me and kissed me on the lips that was my first kiss and now I am dating Cedric Diggory.

THE END!!!!!!!!!! Nope. Four more chapters. So far.


Last edited by textrix on Sun Dec 18, 2011 8:02 pm; edited 1 time in total
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TheIan
Armbiter of Good Fanfiction
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Join date : 2009-06-12
Location : Dining car on the Train of Time, DenLiner

PostSubject: Re: "Midnight Run"   Sun Dec 18, 2011 7:02 pm

It's customary to drop a link to the story.

I've seen some stupid writing, but this... I just don't even
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Sutremaine
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PostSubject: Re: "Midnight Run"   Sun Dec 18, 2011 7:07 pm

Is this a stealth Haruhi crossover?
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WD40
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PostSubject: Re: "Midnight Run"   Mon Dec 19, 2011 12:55 am

Quote :
Herimione Granger's point of view:

Fffff...

Quote :
Cedric Diggory's point of view:

FFFFFFF...

Quote :
Ginny Weasley's point of view:


FFFFFFF...

Quote :
Harry Potter's point of view:

[You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]



... that is all.
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grmblfjx
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PostSubject: Re: "Midnight Run"   Mon Dec 19, 2011 8:11 am


Hahahaha oh God I LLol'ed. Well done.


Quote :
I like her and that is what I like in a girl .


I like these characters, they... well, I wish real people were that simple.
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Yattara
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PostSubject: Re: "Midnight Run"   Mon Dec 19, 2011 8:49 am

The thing that bothers me the most, apart from the repetitions and the multiple POV's? Why is Cedric sharing a dorm with Harry? They're from different Houses.

Also, where's Ron?
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textrix

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PostSubject: Re: "Midnight Run"   Mon Dec 19, 2011 12:07 pm

Yattara wrote:
Why is Cedric sharing a dorm with Harry? They're from different Houses.
I might be wrong (I didn't read the whole thing, because, pain!), but I suspect it's because there's going to be some sort of girlfriend swap occurring. The fic states that it will be a Harry/Hermione story. I guess it simplifies things if the two guys share a room?

Or maybe it's because every POV has to have the same scene, so the less complicated, the better?

Or maybe it's because the writer is a RETARD?

I don't know. If I think about it too much it hurts.
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Reepicheep-chan
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PostSubject: Re: "Midnight Run"   Thu Dec 29, 2011 11:21 am

Hahahaha... omgosh. The hell is this even.
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Kari Izumi
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PostSubject: Re: "Midnight Run"   Fri Dec 30, 2011 2:35 am

Quote :
This is like Groundhog Day except instead of the same day being repeated interminably, every moment is repeated 8 different ways. Who would be this stupid?
This is like Brenda Hampton wrote this. Go watch an episode of 7th Heaven post season 8 or that Secret Life show, and you'll have no less than four scenes with four sets of characters talking about the EXACT same even, almost word for word.

That's what this fic reminds me of.
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SouthSimGal
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PostSubject: Re: "Midnight Run"   Mon Jun 25, 2012 10:58 am

When I was 9 years old I wrote a short story with POV swaps and repetition like this... a year later I found it and it became the bane of my writing career. I suspect that the author of this "story" is actually way too young to be on fanfiction.net unattended.
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dracowaltztard



Join date : 2010-10-12
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PostSubject: Re: "Midnight Run"   Mon Jun 25, 2012 8:21 pm

Here's a link.

And. . .it gets worse. I've only skimmed it, but I've noticed more of the same, with Revived!James and Lily, random marriages and pregnancies, and characters from "Pride and Prejudice" and "Water for Elephants" popping out of nowhere. I'm starting to agree with SouthSim that whoever wrote this must be young.
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