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 Ichabod Crane by JDLuvaSQEE

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Reepicheep-chan
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PostSubject: Ichabod Crane by JDLuvaSQEE    Mon Oct 31, 2011 7:53 pm

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OK, Sleepy Hollow is a good Halloween fic, yeah? I hope so, because I am all dressed up and have no Goddamn fucking ass trick-or-treaters.

Fuck.

Anyways, this is a short poem describing some girl/ girl-like troll's crush on Ichabod Crane (Johnny Depp). She describes him as looking and smelling like pumpkins and candlelight and such. I think she might have her characters confused! She ends with this memorable final line:

Quote :
Ichabod Crane: The Most Gorgeous Constable in all of New York.

And since that was short I will [You must be registered and logged in to see this link.] by the same author to you as well. It cuts to the point by just being about Johnny Depp. In it the author describes his voice as 'cashmere' and his scent as 'amethyst'. Thin line between poetry and synesthesia, author! She pulls it together for the more straight-forward end note, though:

Quote :
Johnny Depp: The Handsomest Actor in the entire world.

Ok, [You must be registered and logged in to see this link.]! I will let you read that one on your own, but *spoilers* the final line is:
Quote :
Tarrant Hightopp: The Handsomest Mad Hatter in Wonderland!

Or maybe it ends like this!

Quote :
Willy Wonka: The Most Scrumdidilyumptious Chocolatier in the Entire World!

Or like this!

Quote :
Sweeney Todd: The Most Handsome Demon Barber in all of London.

Or like this!!

Quote :
Chucky: The Sexiest Homicidal Doll in the World!





Wait, what?
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Hawaiian Shirt
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PostSubject: Re: Ichabod Crane by JDLuvaSQEE    Mon Oct 31, 2011 8:00 pm

I know poetry is subjective and there is no one way to make a poem and that art is a living, breathing creature and I just DON'T GET IT but I'm pretty sure rhyming "candlelight" and "moonlight" doesn't count.
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Reepicheep-chan
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PostSubject: Re: Ichabod Crane by JDLuvaSQEE    Mon Oct 31, 2011 8:03 pm

Hawaiian Shirt wrote:
I'm pretty sure rhyming "candlelight" and "moonlight" doesn't count.
I am also pretty sure that the line "He has curly bright orange hair that splays out in all directions and has a dark green top hat that has a bunch of other colors in it and a soft pink ribbon around it." does not count either, but what do I know?
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PostSubject: Re: Ichabod Crane by JDLuvaSQEE    Mon Oct 31, 2011 9:47 pm

Poor Johnny Depp. He doesn't deserve all the fangirl obsession and the endless parade of Sues that hook up with his characters.
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PostSubject: Re: Ichabod Crane by JDLuvaSQEE    Mon Oct 31, 2011 10:43 pm

it's bullshit that no one obsesses over his character in Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas
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PostSubject: Re: Ichabod Crane by JDLuvaSQEE    Tue Nov 01, 2011 11:11 pm

^^^ This. And yet that movie is ignored by most people...

But what about Edward Scissorhands? Or that guy whose name I can't remember from Benny and Joon? Where's their love?
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Reepicheep-chan
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PostSubject: Re: Ichabod Crane by JDLuvaSQEE    Wed Nov 02, 2011 12:01 am

I am honestly surprised she left out Edward Scissorhands. Even I have a crush on Edward Scissorhands.
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PostSubject: Re: Ichabod Crane by JDLuvaSQEE    Wed Nov 02, 2011 3:33 am

My god, you need to bring supplies if you want to make it through her profile page. I think that has to be the longest one I've ever seen.
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