| Terrible lines that made it into published works | |
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Dr. Professor Science Ghoti
Join date : 2009-06-25 Age : 32 Location : One of the guys with the giant papier-mâché dongs in Lysistrata
| Subject: Terrible lines that made it into published works Sat Jun 27, 2009 5:15 pm | |
| What are the worst things you've ever seen in a published book? My personal favourite is: - Quote :
- A broad grin brightened Kirk’s face. It was as if the sun had dispelled dark clouds. Spock felt dizzy just being near such a mercurial being.
It's from Star Trek: Academy. In fact, this glorious work of the purest art has been given form in this image by tlc010. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] | |
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Braigwen Why yes, I am a Rocket Scientist!
Join date : 2009-06-14 Age : 44 Location : Punching Udina.
| Subject: Re: Terrible lines that made it into published works Sat Jun 27, 2009 5:24 pm | |
| And then they found an empty broom closet and played Leap Frog... | |
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karmyn31 Sporkbender
Join date : 2009-06-10 Age : 48
| Subject: Re: Terrible lines that made it into published works Sat Jun 27, 2009 7:24 pm | |
| - Quote :
- You can suck my titties now.
The word titties does not belong in a romance novel. I haven't really been able to read Vickie Lewis Thompson since then. | |
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KJM Sporkbender
Join date : 2009-06-11 Age : 45
| Subject: Re: Terrible lines that made it into published works Sat Jun 27, 2009 9:17 pm | |
| - Quote :
- A broad grin brightened Kirk’s face. It was as if the sun had dispelled dark clouds. Spock felt dizzy just being near such a mercurial being.
Nope, no K/S here. | |
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Sloth Sporkbender
Join date : 2009-06-03 Age : 34 Location : Location: Location
| Subject: Re: Terrible lines that made it into published works Sat Jun 27, 2009 9:36 pm | |
| - Quote :
- A deafening scream tore out of Eragon
- Quote :
- A deafening scream tore out of Eragon
- Quote :
- A deafening scream tore out of Eragon
- Quote :
- A deafening scream tore out of Eragon
Christopher Paolini used that phrase roughly ten million times in the first novel he excreted, and it gets more irritating every time I read it. It doesn't help that the phrase somehow creates in my mind the image of a Casper-like anthromorphic scream clawing its way out of someone's mouth. | |
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Dr. Professor Science Ghoti
Join date : 2009-06-25 Age : 32 Location : One of the guys with the giant papier-mâché dongs in Lysistrata
| Subject: Re: Terrible lines that made it into published works Sat Jun 27, 2009 10:13 pm | |
| - KJM wrote:
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- Quote :
- A broad grin brightened Kirk’s face. It was as if the sun had dispelled dark clouds. Spock felt dizzy just being near such a mercurial being.
Nope, no K/S here. This novel was written by Shatner himself. | |
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Miraba Sporkbender
Join date : 2009-06-10 Location : Washington DC
| Subject: Re: Terrible lines that made it into published works Sat Jun 27, 2009 10:35 pm | |
| - Dr. Professor Science wrote:
- KJM wrote:
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- Quote :
- A broad grin brightened Kirk’s face. It was as if the sun had dispelled dark clouds. Spock felt dizzy just being near such a mercurial being.
Nope, no K/S here. This novel was written by Shatner himself. As if we didn't need another indication of the size of his ego. | |
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Spotts1701 Chief Cook and Bottle Washer
Join date : 2009-06-10 Age : 44 Location : New Vertiform City
| Subject: Re: Terrible lines that made it into published works Sat Jun 27, 2009 10:59 pm | |
| - Miraba wrote:
- Dr. Professor Science wrote:
- KJM wrote:
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- Quote :
- A broad grin brightened Kirk’s face. It was as if the sun had dispelled dark clouds. Spock felt dizzy just being near such a mercurial being.
Nope, no K/S here. This novel was written by Shatner himself. As if we didn't need another indication of the size of his ego. Nah - his name's just on the book. Judith and Garfield Reeves-Stevens write most of it. And seriously, it's pretty awful stuff and I don't read it (and I've read some really terrible Trek books like Mutiny on the Enterprise and The Entropy Effect). | |
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Dr. Professor Science Ghoti
Join date : 2009-06-25 Age : 32 Location : One of the guys with the giant papier-mâché dongs in Lysistrata
| Subject: Re: Terrible lines that made it into published works Sat Jun 27, 2009 11:19 pm | |
| - Spotts1701 wrote:
- Miraba wrote:
- Dr. Professor Science wrote:
- KJM wrote:
-
- Quote :
- A broad grin brightened Kirk’s face. It was as if the sun had dispelled dark clouds. Spock felt dizzy just being near such a mercurial being.
Nope, no K/S here. This novel was written by Shatner himself. As if we didn't need another indication of the size of his ego. Nah - his name's just on the book. Judith and Garfield Reeves-Stevens write most of it. And seriously, it's pretty awful stuff and I don't read it (and I've read some really terrible Trek books like Mutiny on the Enterprise and The Entropy Effect). I got it as a joke present for my birthday from one of my friends. Shatner's name is at least four times as big as the other authors. | |
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Root Admin Administrator
Join date : 2009-06-03 Age : 35 Location : 997
| Subject: Re: Terrible lines that made it into published works Sun Jun 28, 2009 1:54 am | |
| - Dr. Professor Science wrote:
I got it as a joke present for my birthday from one of my friends. Shatner's name is at least four times as big as the other authors. Uh, this reminds me: I was in middle school and thought cool books had cool book titles and cool author names. There was this awesome looking hardcover in the Science Fiction section that appealed to my childish ways of finding a good book to read. Guess what the name of that fucking book was: Tekwar. I opened it, read two pages, got dizzy, set the damn thing down, tried to read it again, got past another paragraph, then threw it into the night drop with disgust. I don't even remember what those two pages were about- I just remember being really fucking disappointed. Maybe I'll try it again someday. Tekwar taught me a lesson: books with cool titles can be super, super terrible. Or a book named Tekwar is not about Lego Robots. Yeah, I thought it may have had Legos in it at the time. Like Lego Borgs. What?
Last edited by Nihilist on Tue Jun 30, 2009 7:59 pm; edited 1 time in total | |
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EileenK98 Recovering Fanbrat
Join date : 2009-06-10 Age : 55 Location : very, very close to Chris
| Subject: Re: Terrible lines that made it into published works Sun Jun 28, 2009 6:38 am | |
| Do I even need to mention the one about the lion and the lamb? You all know what I'm talking about. *facepalm* | |
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Chris91 Knight of the Bleach
Join date : 2009-06-13 Age : 56 Location : Salem, Mass., USA
| Subject: Re: Terrible lines that made it into published works Mon Jun 29, 2009 11:07 am | |
| Maybe they do, but I don't. | |
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Miraba Sporkbender
Join date : 2009-06-10 Location : Washington DC
| Subject: Re: Terrible lines that made it into published works Mon Jun 29, 2009 11:53 am | |
| - EileenK98 wrote:
- Do I even need to mention the one about the lion and the lamb?
You all know what I'm talking about. *facepalm* You're mentioning just one quote? What restraint. | |
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Fitchsticks Sporkbender
Join date : 2009-06-10 Age : 34
| Subject: Re: Terrible lines that made it into published works Mon Jun 29, 2009 12:17 pm | |
| - Miraba wrote:
- EileenK98 wrote:
- Do I even need to mention the one about the lion and the lamb?
You all know what I'm talking about. *facepalm* You're mentioning just one quote? What restraint. Can't forget the constant chagrin either. It's always just around the corner. | |
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Mae Bedlam Sporkbender
Join date : 2009-06-10 Age : 36 Location : The Coney Island Disco Palace
| Subject: Re: Terrible lines that made it into published works Mon Jun 29, 2009 12:30 pm | |
| I'm fond of "my own personal brand of heroin" myself. Amy Lee must be kicking herself for not coming up with that one. | |
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Lysander Armbiter of Good Fanfiction
Join date : 2009-06-10
| Subject: Re: Terrible lines that made it into published works Mon Jun 29, 2009 1:19 pm | |
| "PUCKERED!"
Just fuck you. Fuck you, and fuck your puckering. | |
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Yenflarg
Join date : 2009-06-17
| Subject: Re: Terrible lines that made it into published works Wed Jul 01, 2009 3:55 pm | |
| - Quote :
- She shuttered from excitement
Some Alison Tyler-edited erotic anthology. Any one of her edited anthologies is good for at least 5 glaring typos. Another one I loved (but don't remember the exact quote) is from Jennifer Crusie's "Anyone But You." It talks about someone on an exercise bike on a balcony who was - Quote :
- peddling away.
Romance novels and erotica are usually rife with typos. (edited to fix type size in the first quote, and to place a period inside of a quote box) | |
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Tungsten Monk Sporkbender
Join date : 2009-06-11 Age : 36 Location : Cedar Rapids, IA
| Subject: Re: Terrible lines that made it into published works Wed Jul 01, 2009 7:15 pm | |
| Evening mentioning "Eragon" once seems like an unfair advantage--Paolini's purple prose is legendary--but I think my favorite phrase of his has to be "the courage, nay, the desire . . ." I had to put it down so I could go outside and laugh. | |
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SokMunkie Sporkbender
Join date : 2009-06-11 Age : 45 Location : KC,MO
| Subject: Re: Terrible lines that made it into published works Thu Jul 02, 2009 9:25 pm | |
| - Fitchsticks wrote:
- Miraba wrote:
- EileenK98 wrote:
- Do I even need to mention the one about the lion and the lamb?
You all know what I'm talking about. *facepalm* You're mentioning just one quote? What restraint. Can't forget the constant chagrin either. It's always just around the corner. Well, I'm completely lost... | |
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Miraba Sporkbender
Join date : 2009-06-10 Location : Washington DC
| Subject: Re: Terrible lines that made it into published works Thu Jul 02, 2009 9:26 pm | |
| We're talking about Twilight. | |
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Inciter Sporkbender
Join date : 2009-06-10 Age : 34 Location : My sexual fantasty world
| Subject: Re: Terrible lines that made it into published works Thu Jul 02, 2009 9:45 pm | |
| - EileenK98 wrote:
- Do I even need to mention the one about the lion and the lamb?
You all know what I'm talking about. *facepalm* That line's so bad that my sister, who's a huge Twilight fan, thinks it's retarded. When we watched the movie and that part came up, she turned to me and said "Why couldn't they just cut that out of the movie? It's probably the dumbest line in the whole book.". :D I'll have to go with any sentence in HBP that talked about "the beast in Harry's chest". | |
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Sheba Shitgobbling pissdrinker
Join date : 2009-06-10 Age : 36
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SokMunkie Sporkbender
Join date : 2009-06-11 Age : 45 Location : KC,MO
| Subject: Re: Terrible lines that made it into published works Thu Jul 02, 2009 11:00 pm | |
| - Miraba wrote:
- We're talking about Twilight.
Oh, duh! And I've even seen the movie. | |
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KJM Sporkbender
Join date : 2009-06-11 Age : 45
| Subject: Re: Terrible lines that made it into published works Fri Jul 03, 2009 12:22 am | |
| - Sheba wrote:
- Harry had a chestburster?!
Sounds like a great idea for an AU fic. Also: "I'll kill you to death!" | |
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Jenny Islander Sporkbender
Join date : 2009-07-16
| Subject: Re: Terrible lines that made it into published works Tue Jul 21, 2009 7:41 pm | |
| "But this was no chicken. This was evil manifest." | |
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| Terrible lines that made it into published works | |
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