"Let He Who Is Without Sin...Father! Why are you stealing that sofa cover?"

Roman Catholic Priest Busted For Shoplifting

Quote :

A Roman Catholic priest was accused of shoplifting butter and a sofa cover at a Wal-Mart in southern Illinois. Police arrested 41-year-old the Rev. Steven Poole on Friday. He's charged with two felony theft counts. Investigators said Poole failed to scan a $3.22 container of butter and a $60 sofa cover at a self-checkout. Poole then allegedly went to the store's bedding section, picked up a memory foam mattress and switched the pricing bar code. That caused the $145 item to be scanned for $31.

I heard the church was hard up for money, but damn that's bad.

Okay, the butter could have been an innocent mistake but everything else? Not so much. *points and laughs*

Am I the only person who, when noticing that someone is buying an odd combination of items, tries to figure out what they're going to combine them to do?

...yeah, all I'm coming up with so far is "sofa cover + mattress pad = really sore ass? (x eat butter)", but the point stands, hmmmm?

He's not in the news for molesting kids? This is a bit of a step up for the RC clergy.

Delcat wrote:

Am I the only person who, when noticing that someone is buying an odd combination of items, tries to figure out what they're going to combine them to do?

...yeah, all I'm coming up with so far is "sofa cover + mattress pad = really sore ass? (x eat butter)", but the point stands, hmmmm?

Butter or anything greasy instantly makes anything else one is buying take on grubby undertones. Throw a Catholic priest into the mix and I'm sure there's something hilarious in there.

Delcat wrote:

Am I the only person who, when noticing that someone is buying an odd combination of items, tries to figure out what they're going to combine them to do?

...yeah, all I'm coming up with so far is "sofa cover + mattress pad = really sore ass? (x eat butter)", but the point stands, hmmmm?

Just for this, I'm going to take every opportunity from now on to buy totally weird combinations of items for entirely unrelated things, just to raise eyebrows. Hand lotion + needle and thread + vacuum cleaner attachments = nothing, but someone will go crazy trying to figure something out. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

KelinciHutan wrote:

Hand lotion + needle and thread + vacuum cleaner attachments = nothing

Vacuum cleaner attachment for the best fit for your cock.

Needle and thread to tie your condom down to something, like your belt. Otherwise the suction might suck the condom off.

Hand lotion for your cock afterwards.

VileCorp wrote:

Vacuum cleaner attachment for the best fit for your cock.

Needle and thread to tie your condom down to something, like your belt. Otherwise the suction might suck the condom off.

Hand lotion for your cock afterwards.

sounds very painful.

VileCorp wrote:

Needle and thread to tie your condom down to something, like your belt. Otherwise the suction might suck the condom off.

I kind of don´t want to know why you would need a condom when, uh, engaging with your vacuum-cleaner, because I don't think I can take it if yours is the kind of vacuum where there's a legitimate threat of catching some kind of hepatitis.

Jay/Cris wrote:

want to know why you would need a condom

Mom complains about the jizz dripping from the hose.

VileCorp wrote:

Mom complains about the jizz dripping from the hose.

Uh...yeah not something I needed to know.

Delcat wrote:

"sofa cover + mattress pad = really sore ass? (x eat butter)

Oh come on, the butter isn't food. He's going to use it in lieu of ointment to soothe his sore ass, because real men don't buy (steal) pansy-ass lotion, and do you want to be a priest asking for ass ointment in the pharmacy?

VileCorp wrote:

Jay/Cris wrote:

want to know why you would need a condom

Mom complains about the jizz dripping from the hose.

I have just laughed so much, I sprayed a mouthful of wine all over my cat. My sleeping cat. On my lap. Now I am in pain and bleeding profusely. Oh, Viley, I'm so glad I took you off my Ignore list!