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 Raping Amanda Bynes and Avril Lavigne (NWS)

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Saint Archie

Saint Archie


Join date : 2009-06-12
Age : 37
Location : The outermost fringe of madness.

Raping Amanda Bynes and Avril Lavigne (NWS) Empty
PostSubject: Raping Amanda Bynes and Avril Lavigne (NWS)   Raping Amanda Bynes and Avril Lavigne (NWS) EmptySun Jun 14, 2009 12:26 pm

Raping Amanda Bynes and Avril Lavinge!

One of the most infamous celebrity rape-fics in existance, this nine-part epic, written by one Dave Haugen, has become notorious for the following three reasons:

1. It is really fucking long.

2. The level of detail he goes into, whilst describing the various acts that his thinly-veiled self-insert gets up to, is frankly astonishing.

3. It has an ending that is so shockingly pathetic, it has to be seen to be believed.

So, it starts out with our hero, Dave, (he actually calls himself Mike in the story, but he's not fooling anyone), explaining how much he, er, admires Amanda Bynes:

Quote :
Don't know her? Check her out on the old www.imdb.com movie database website. If you like 'em young, thin and innocent, you'll love my little Amanda. I'd been jacking off to her for years. I'd have given up my eternal soul to have 24 hours with her 5 foot 8, 105 pound body. Some of you might not like your babes that skinny, but for me, it just means more tightness to plow through when your mattress-mashing 'em.
So yeah, that's pretty much everything you need to know about Dave as far as this fic's concerned. He really wants to fuck Amanda Bynes, to the extent that he would sell his soul for 24 hours with her at his mercy.

Well, it just so happens that Dave has a friend named Steve, who just happens to work at the very studios where Amanda is filming a TV show! If that sounds somewhat contrived, well, that's because it is. Anyway, Steve's been working as a corporate lawyer for Warner Brothers for over a decade, and seems to have a pretty good career built up, but fortunately for Dave, Steve has absolutely no problem with putting all of that at risk so that he and Dave can spend a happy week together raping some celebrities:

Quote :
Steve had some great opportunities to set up a kidnapping, and that he did. I'll spare you all the details; basically my job was to wait inside my Passat at a predetermined location until Steve dropped off the chloroformed and bound girls to me. Right on schedule, about 9 pm, Steve drove up and handed me the two limp bodies that were effectively roped, duct taped, gagged and hooded.
I should advise readers that this is the last occasion where Dave will opt to spare us all the details for quite some time.

With the problems one would expect to encounter whilst trying to kidnap two people by oneself conveniently dealt with off-screen, Dave drives the two girls out to his private bungalow near Yuma. That's private as opposed to those regular bungalows that people can just walk right into at their leisure, presumably. Once there, he proceeds to explain how he had already brought his dog, Duke, out there at an earlier date, and how his neighbour, Craig, had been looking after the dog, but that now Craig would be going on a convenient trip to Europe, so there'd be no chance of him realising that something was amiss. Because, unlike the irrelevant matter of that kidnapping, this is shit we need to know.

When he "unwraps" them however, he's shocked to discover that, thanks to another bizarre contrivance, Steve grabbed, not Amanda's co-star Jennie Garth, but Avril Lavigne! Who just happened to be with Amanda for some reason, when Steve came to grab her! What amazing luck these guys have! So, with his airtight plans having come to fruition, Dave wakes the two girls up and gets started:

Quote :
CRACKKKKKKKKKKKK!!!! I slapped Miss Lavigne hard, hard enough to send her face turning to the right side of her body, and to leave a nice red stinging palm print on her delicate little cheek.
It's worth mentioning that he repeats that ALLCAPS WITH MULITPLE EXCALMATION MARRRRRRRKKKKKS!!!!!!! motif every time he hits one of them.

Every. Single. Time.

And he hits them a lot.

For some reason, despite his earlier talk about selling his soul for 24 hours with Amanda Bynes, it's Avril who gets by far the bulk of the abuse once Dave gets going:

Quote :
My flogger was 16 inches long with 12 strands of leather. Perfect for turning chests red without doing any real damage. It would hurt like hell I'm sure. What did I know, I didn't have milk glands in me thank God.

SMACKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Amanda cried out the number "one" in distress as I laid into Avril's tits, causing them to jiggle a bit. Avril screamed out loudly, piercing my ear drums, and a series of pink stripes began to magically appear over her tender skin.
And once he gets going, he just keeps on going...

Quote :
WHAAAPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP!!!!!!!!!!!!

"FUCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!" yelled Avril loudly before Amanda even had a chance to count. Avril's hands flew down and started massaging her painfully sore boobs in an inevitable failing attempt to somehow, ANYHOW, relieve the terrible pain she was feeling.

"Oh God, no more!!!! You're KILLING me!!!!!! No more!!!" begged and pleaded Avril pathetically. I loved it.
...and going...

Quote :
Stepping off the bed, I grabbed a roll of duct tape and began to plan the position I wanted Avril to be in. I grabbed her kicking left leg, which wasn't easy with all of the thrashing and yelling going on. I took her ankle and pushed her foot back until her heel was just touching her left butt cheek, resulting in her knee pointing straight up to the ceiling. I began wrapping duct tape around and around, effectively keeping her left leg completely bent. I then repeated the procedure on her right leg. Perfect!
...and going...

Quote :
"Since you're kind of ugly Avril, I thought you should be eating your meal from a dog food bowl. Here you go!" I said as I placed it on the floor, just in front of her. Her eyes looked down and she caught the wafting odor of the horrible smelling canned dog food. She recognized immediately what it was, but I don't think she knew that it was more than just dog food...that it had my urine soaking through it!
..and going...

Quote :
I quietly got out of bed, so as not to disturb Amanda, and I peeked underneath the covers to see how Avril was doing. She too was sleeping, but the neat thing was that you could see her tummy vibrating as I knew that the monster dildo inside her cunt was still thrumming away. I wondered what the end result of that would be. I sure hoped that I didn't numb all of Avril's inner tissues as I wanted her to experience more brutal penetrations of her stuck-up pussy. I was sure that even when I yanked that dildo out of what I assumed would be a nice large gaping hole, that she would feel it and start bitching me out again as I was so happily used to by now. I replaced the covers and decided that it was time to make some breakfast.
...and going...

Quote :
"Well Avril, you lost the contest fair and square, so it looks like you get a date with Duke as a reward! Aren't you lucky? I'll bet you're the first ever bestiality pop star! Maybe I should film this for posterity. After all, an event like this doesn't happen everyday. Imagine if this thing ever got out...it would start circulating around the black market forever! I can just see it now, people bidding on E-Bay for DVDs of your pussy getting dog fucked."
...and going. I defy you people to read this thing in its entirety. How could anyone type up this much with one hand? There are nearly sixty-fucking-thousand words of it. And most of it is much worse than the parts I've quoted. There is, however, a noticeable shift in the structure of the fic after part 7; the last two chapters are considerably shorter, and also feature the introduction of some Random Huge-Dicked Black RapistsTM, that Steve had to enlist to cover up evidence after that kidnapping he did.

Being black men in a bad rape-fic, they naturally want to fuck everything that moves with their freakishly large penises, and, as one would expect by this stage, Dave is only too happy to let them have their way with Avril. Unfortunately, as one of them is getting started, his colossal weight (see, he's also a big fat black guy), causes the bed they're on to collapse, right on Steve's toes! What a catastrophe! What a disaster! What a really big fucking contrivance!

Yes, just when it looked like Dave would be unable to spare his beloved Amanda the horrors of being raped by those big black monster dicks, Steve gets his foot crushed, necessitating a trip to the hospital. But it's not all plain sailing:

Quote :
As I started to push the front passenger seat back in preperation to hold Avril, another rush of adrenaline started to flow through my veins as I heard Amanda uttering out a sharp piercing scream...

"MIKE!!! HELP ME!!!!"

Faster than I've ever ran before, I dashed back inside the house to find that Lou had awoken somewhat and had a hold of Amanda's ankle in his hands. Grabbing my golf club, I slammed it down onto Lou's chubby forearm, which caused him to instantly let go of Amanda's leg. A few more shots to his head assured me that he was knocked out again.
YEAH! YOU GET HIM, DAVE MIKE! YOU'RE A FUCKING HERO!!!

See, because she's been treated somewhat better than Avril, Amanda's pretty much developed Stockholm Syndrome in the space of two days, so she's only too happy to nurse Steve's foot during the drive to the hospital. Meanwhile, Dave's had something of an epiphany:

Quote :
Things hadn't turned out exactly as I had planned, but I knew that I didn't want any harm to come to Amanda, and that the best place for her was back home with her family where she would be safe.
So, all's well that ends well. Amanda (technically) didn't get raped, and Dave learned that sixteen-year-old girls are better off at home with their families, and not held against their will at the mercy of a sadistic rapist. Which is, I think, a valuable lesson for all of us. Anyway, before long they arrive at the hospital, and are forced to say their goodbyes:

Quote :
"This is where you'll get out too. I just want you to know that I, uh..." I was trying to get the right words out, sounding like some gawky teenager ending a first date.

"It's okay," interrupted Amanda, flashing me a quick smile. "I know."
Awwwwww... I love bittersweet endings, me. However, that's not quite the end:

Quote :
She then opened the car door, and walked around the car, to help Avril out. Several hospital attendants came out to meet us, and quickly ushered Steve and Avril inside....

...WHAM!!!...

...My hand went crashing on top of my alarm clock as it woke me up out of my deep slumber. Sweat was beading down my forehead as I took a few seconds to gather my thoughts before realizing where the hell I was.

I looked at the now silenced clock, it's digital readout telling me it was 5:45 in the morning. It felt like I had been asleep for a thousand years.

I fell back, my head hitting the pillow, as I slowly started to wake up, realizing I was in L.A., in my house, in my boxers, in my bed.
Yes, that's right: It was a dream.

The entire thing.

Was a dream.

That is the kind of twist ending I'd expect from a ten-year-old. Or the writers of Dallas.

A dream!

IT WAS A FUCKING DREAM!

I honestly don't know what disgusts me more, the fact that someone took the time to write 150 pages' worth of this excruciatingly detailed shit-fic, or the fact that "lol it was all a dream" was the best ending he could come up with for it.

Anyway, that's pretty much all I have to say about this fic. There's still a lot from the earlier chapters I skipped over, but that's because writing anymore about the thing means reading it through properly, and that's just not something I'm prepared to do twice in one lifetime.
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