Black & Decker does not make sex toys...

...so don't turn their product into one.

Quote :

Some sexual experimentation landed a southern Maryland woman in a hospital with injuries tough to imagine and even more difficult to forget.

Maryland State Police airlifted the 27-year-old woman to Prince George's County Hospital Center early Sunday morning after she was injured in an incident involving a sex toy attached to a saber saw blade, TheBayNet.com first reported.

The man who called 911 about the incident admitted attaching the sex toy to the saw and then using the high-powered, homemade device on his
partner, according to the St. Mary's County Sheriff's Office.

They attached a sex toy... to a saw.

Wow... either she must have orgasmed every time a saw came onscreen in the Saw movies, or she really had a thing for flirting with bizarre genital injuries. Maybe both.

Did these two learn nothing from the couple that tried a dildo on an electric knife in the same way?

How ironic that this is my 69th post.

Specifically, they attached a sex toy to this type of saw.

I mean I've heard of wanting an experience you'd never forget...but this is a bit much, yes?

...Anyone here ever watch Moral Orel?

Mafiosa wrote:

...Anyone here ever watch Moral Orel?

No, because it fucking sucked in every way imaginable.

Mikey Go WOOGA wrote:

Mafiosa wrote:

...Anyone here ever watch Moral Orel?

No, because it fucking sucked in every way imaginable.

oh u

Anyway for those not up to speed, the mom mutilates herself repeatedly with mini jackhammer and power drills to get attention from her doctor.

Life imitates art.

That's different, though. That's Munchausen's syndrome, which does exist in real life, by the way. (Although I don't think it's usually to...that extreme.)

Whereas I kind of doubt that this story was intentional.

I'm all for experimenting with ways to make your sex life better, but I'm drawing the line at power tools.

And did they never stop to think that the saw could cut through whatever it was? Sex toys tend to be kinda cheaply constructed in the first place. If whatever it was was plastic (which I'm assuming it was), how could they expect the saw to NOT cut through it?

One can only hope this has sterilized her so that she doesn't pass on the stupid. (either through genes or parenting)

"Oh, I want a vibrator for my birthday."

"Aw, honey, let's just use my trusty cordless drill. Can't be much different."

This here is a special kind of stupid. If she had died, the Darwin Award would have been her's.

Spotts1701 wrote:

Specifically, they attached a sex toy to this type of saw.

:unskilled78: :unskilled78: :unskilled78: :unskilled78: :unskilled78: :unskilled78: :unskilled78:

Sloth wrote:

Spotts1701 wrote:

Specifically, they attached a sex toy to this type of saw.

:unskilled78: :unskilled78: :unskilled78: :unskilled78: :unskilled78: :unskilled78: :unskilled78:

My thoughts exactly.

T.S.Orr wrote:

This here is a special kind of stupid. If she had died, the Darwin Award would have been her's.

Sterilization is good enough if it's caused in a suitably stupid fashion. This would've qualified, no doubt.

I can't imagine the thought processes that went into this. All I can think is that that conversation went like this.

"Honey, are you sure? A saw dildo sounds kinda dangerous"

"I know... :quagmire: "

I laughed at this. I'm horrible person and I should be ashamed of myself.

We have a saw like that. The blade moves up and down very fastly. It's quite handy tool for cutting through small things, like pipes and thin pieces of wood. For anything bigger I would use motor saw or circular saw.

After saying that it's a handy tool, I also say that I wouldn't ever in my right mind attach sex toys in it. And let's not talk about actually putting that inside of someone, you already saw what happened.

Quote :

Investigators talked to the woman, who told them she suffered the injuries during a consensual act and that she and her partner were trying something new and no crime was committed, the sheriff's office said.]

"It's okay! I meant to do that!" [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

I've seen those before. It sounds like she basically impaled the dong on the blade and, surprise surprise, the blade came through the end of the toy. Smart people would have used a different mount.

Besides, the Craftsman Drilldo seems easier to use...

Quote :

You can penetrate and drill with it alone if you like raw metal

How - wha - ouch! [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] Seriously, what part of her brain thought this was a good idea? Mounting a sex-toy on a Black & Decker tool - sure, that's one thing - but did it never occur to her that taking the saw off first might have been a good idea?

Also - Heywood - that link makes me giggle. That thing looks absolutely ridiculous. It looks like something a carpenter might think was awesome at three in the morning, coming down from a long weekend of getting absolutely drunk out of his mind.

Indeed it does. I mean, it looks like they bundle it with a 7.2v cordless - you'd hardly feel it. Serious users would connect that to a 120v or 240v hammer-drill. It looks like the bit could also be used in a bench-press with a 3/8" chuck...

...how did I know it was going to be a reciprocating saw when I saw the title?

Kitbug wrote:

...how did I know it was going to be a reciprocating saw when I saw the title?

Because a table saw wouldn't move the right way?

Nihilist wrote:

"Oh, I want a vibrator for my birthday."

"Aw, honey, let's just use my trusty cordless drill. Can't be much different."

LOL!

But GOD, we get so much of this kind of crap. People are SO DAMN STUPID.

is this not an urban legend

I didn't know my vagina could wince.